PONY

by Deathsia

Rediscovering who i am

REDISCOVERING WHO I AM

“She's still not over him?” The cyan blue Pegasus asked incredulously a week later as the two left surgarcube corner.

“Doesn't look like it, and what's worse is her hair is flat and not it's normal puffy look. Is that normal for her when she's depressed?” Ericka asked curiously.

“Yeah, but I’ve never seen her down in the dumps for this long before. She usually bounces back in a day or two.” Rainbow Dash replied in a concerned tone as the two walked up to Twilight and Rarity whom were talking up till the two walked up to them.

“Still the same?” Rarity asked to which the two mares nodded.

“We need to do something for her, but what?” Twilight remarked as she placed a hoof on her chin.

“Hey, I got it! How about a gift?” The cyan blue Pegasus suggested.

“That's a wonderful idea darling! We'll each bring her a gift! That should cheer her up!” Rarity exclaimed excitedly.

“Then it's agreed, we'll each bring Pinkie Pie a gift.” Twilight chimed in at which point the four left each other and went their own separate ways for the time being.

-------------------------------------------

“So what do you plan on giving Pinkie Pie to cheer her up?” Rainbow Dash asked curiously as she did some tricks in the sky while Ericka sat on a cloud reading the same book she was the other day.

“I'm going to draw her something, but what, is the question. I still have a lot of remembering to do if I want to draw anything near as good as I want to give her.

“Not to rain on your parade Cloudkicker, but drawing for earth ponies and Pegasus is a rare thing. In all my years in Cloudsdale, I've seen only two artists and even their work wasn't as good as a unicorn could do. But if you say you were an artist before you lost your memories, then I'm sure it'll just take something big to jar your memory.” The cyan blue Pegasus replied to which Ericka gave a worried expression unknown to her fillyfriend as she looked at the pages of the book.

“If what she says is true and I have no reason to doubt her, then how am I supposed to draw her what I see in my mind? If I can't be as good as I want to be, then what's the point?” Ericka thought to herself depressingly.

“No! I won't give up that easily! I willed myself to fly and I'll do the same with becoming the artist I used to be!” Ericka thought to herself dramatically.

(Play Remind me who I am now)

♫ When I lose my way,♫

♫ And I forget my name,♫

♫ Remind me who I am.♫

Ericka began to run the brush along the canvas now doing her best to draw what she saw in her head now. Yet no matter how many times she tried, it came out horrible. “I can't give up. She's counting on me.” Ericka thought to herself as she began to try again.

------------------------------

Ericka now stood in her base looking into the mirror as she combed her hair and stared at her reflection as if transfixed by it.

♫ In the mirror all I see,♫

“Who am I? Before all this began I was so sure, but now, I don't know anymore...” Ericka thought to herself with a saddened expression now.

♫ Is somepony foreign to me,♫

FLASHBACK

♫ Remind me who I am.♫

Ericka stood over her sister's casket now sobbing aloud as she stared at her body. “I'm so sorry little sis...You were counting on me...and I failed you...I'm so sorry!” Ericka said aloud between sobs.

♫ In the loneliest places,♫

♫ When I can't remember what grace is.♫

END FLASBACK

♫ Tell me once again who I am,♫

Ericka now stared at her most recent painting, though it looked far better, it was no where near as good as she wanted it to be. The dark blue Pegasus then grabbed the edge of the paper with her mouth, yanked it off and balled it up in her hooves before tossing it behind her. “No where near good enough!” Ericka exclaimed and began to try again.

♫ Who I am to You.♫

“Is she okay? She's been drawing for nearly a week strait and barely has taken a break to eat and sleep.” Twilight asked in a concerned tone

“Ah'm sure she's just fine Twi, she's just got her heart set on drawin ah think.” Applejack remarked as she looked at the dark blue Pegasus though a hint of worry could be seen on the farm pony's face now.

♫ Tell me lest I forget who I am,♫

Richard walked past Ericka now whom was still reading a book. Upon closer inspection he realized it was a book that he couldn't read or even understand yet Ericka was reading it like it was her native language. “Ericka, what are you reading?” Richard asked curiously.

“A book I brought back with me. It's called; Intermediate drawing for earth ponies and Pegasus.” Ericka replied as if what she was reading wasn't anything out of the ordinary.

“And you can understand it?” Richard asked incredulously.

♫ Where I belong.♫

“Cloudkicker, I'm really starting to worry about you. You've been drawing and reading those drawing books like a mare possessed for the last month. I'm not one to knock anypony for working hard, but this is bordering on obsession.” Twilight remarked in a concerned tone as Ericka continued to draw the picture on the painting easel.

“I'm fine Twilight. But I can't stop now. She's counting on me and I won't let her down.” Ericka replied not looking away from what she was drawing now.

FLASHBACK

“Oh my gosh! This is so neat! And this is for me?!” Ericka's little sister exclaimed joyfully.

“Yes, I drew it just for you. Do you like it?” Ericka asked with a smile.

“I love it!” Ericka's little sister exclaimed and hugged her tightly. “I love you so much big sis!” Ericka's little sister exclaimed as she continued to hug Ericka whom returned the hug.

“I love you too little sis.” Ericka replied with a warm smile.

♫ When my heart is like a stone,♫

Ericka now stood in front of the exact picture she had drawn for her little sister a day after her funeral as tears streamed from her eyes.

♫ And I'm running far from home,♫

As if in slow motion Ericka began to flail and strike at all her paintings, tearing some to shreds, and punching holes in others until she fell to her ass and looked at what remained of the picture she had drawn for her little sister, reached out, picked it up, and held it close to her heart.

♫ Remind me who I am.♫

END FLASHBACK

Ericka continued to draw now unaware of the tears that now streamed from her eyes as she worked on her current picture though the memories still charged through her mind as if they were a live action movie.

♫ When I can't be there for you,♫

“Damn it! It's not good enough!” Ericka exclaimed as she yanked the painting off the easel and tore it to shreds and moments later sighed.

♫ Afraid I'll never be enough,♫

FLASHBACK

“Chase me!” Ericka's little sister exclaimed as she ran around the yard being chased by Ericka while the two laughed aloud joyfully.

END FLASHBACK

♫ Remind me who I am.♫

Ericka leaned forward and took the paintbrush into her mouth again and began to draw again.

♫ If I'm the one to come to your rescue,♫

FLASHBACK

“We'll always be a team right?” Ericka's little sister asked as she looked up at her while the two sat on a swing together.

“Of course.” Ericka replied.

“And you'll always be there for me right?” Ericka's little sister asked.

“Come hell or high water, I'll be there for you, always.” Ericka replied and hugged her little sister tightly.

♫ Can You help me believe it?♫

END FLASHBACK

♫ Tell me once again who I am.♫

♫ Who I am.♫

♫ Tell me lest I forget who I am,♫

♫ That I belong to here, oh.♫

--------------------------------------------------

“Cloudkicker, that's amazing!” Twilight exclaimed in a shocked tone as she stared at Ericka's painting that she was nearly finished with now.

♫ Tell me once again who I am.♫

“Thanks, but it's not done yet.” Ericka replied with a smile as she applied the final touches to her masterpiece.

♫ Who I am.♫

“I've never seen a earth pony or Pegasus do a work that is this good before.” Twilight thought to herself in awe.

♫ Tell me lest I forget who I am,♫

Ericka walked up the stairs to Pinkie Pie's room now and opened the door to see the pink mare.

“If it's another gift, I've gotten enough of them.” Pinkie Pie replied depressingly.

“I think you might like this one.” Ericka replied as she took the painting out of her saddle-pack and placed it in front of the mare who's eyes widened in surprise at this.

♫ That I belong to here, oh.♫

Pinky stared at a green and blue canvas with glistening light reflecting of the delicate brushstrokes on the grass and leaves. The focus of the picture was the two ponies, sitting at a blanket . "This is us?" Pinky replied looking at the detailed artwork. "It's so beautiful!"

♫ Tell me once again who I am.♫

“Yeah, it's yours little sis.” Ericka replied without thinking.

♫ Who I am.♫

“What did you call me?” Pinkie Pie asked with an wide-eyed expression.

♫ Tell me lest I forget who I am,♫

It was at this point she had realized just what she had said and gasped aloud before she smiled, walked up to the pink mare and hugged her tightly. “You're my little sister. And I'll be there for you, always.” Ericka replied as tears streamed from her eyes now as did Pinkie Pie's but these were not tears of sorrow rather they were tears of joy as she returned the hug.

At this exact moment, as the two shared their hug, a bright light flashed from the side of Ericka's side which caught both mare's attention. “Is that...?” Ericka asked but trailed off now unable to say anything.

“Your cutie mark...it appeared!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed and at this exact moment her hair puffed out to it's normal frizzy appearance.

♫ That I belong to here, oh.♫

On Ericka's flank now was the image of a paintbrush and easel. “I-I can't believe it. I got my cutie mark.” Ericka remarked in a stunned tone as she stared at the image on her side the best she could.

--------------------------------------------

“That's awesome Cloudkicker! You've finally discovered your special talent!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed as she hugged tightly before locking lips with the dark blue Pegasus in front of Twilight, Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity, and Pinkie Pie who just stared at her and smiled proudly.

Ericka looked to the at Pinkie Pie now and could have swore she saw her little sister smiling at her while she danced around the pink mare before her image faded away just as she hugged the pink mare. “You never left me, I just had to find you again little sis.” Ericka thought to herself as tears of joy swelled in her eyes as she stared at Pinkie Pie now...

Comments

[Penguin_Lord]

Was not expecting that to be her cuitemark maybe miss the clues towards them or did seen them. any ways good chapter.

[Deathsia]

1540690

I thought it was quite the tear jerk.

[Cyana Flame]

eeeeeeeeee~!

[Penguin_Lord]

1540710

The chapter showed all the right emotional bits you wanted it also made me sad and tear up a little and I also was just a little bummed that I miss what her cutie mark could be.

[Deathsia]

1541156

Well just like the cutie mark crusaders will eventually learn, a pony's special talent isn't always what we think it is.

[DrakeRenar1]

Yay new update!

Oh and sweet Ericka finally got her cutie mark, and Pinkie Pie is now her little sister!

[Toyloli]

I made a bunch of comments in the google docs version. Also sorry about not getting on till late. Uncles back in hospital. This chapter was sweet, you portrayed the emotion nicely although I'm beginning to hate how you rely upon the 'FLASHBACK' tag... There has to be a less stand outing more grammatically correct way of depicting those bits.

[Flint]

i was listening to this

while reading this chapter

[TheWanderingPikachuPony]

Another sad chapter, but was confused as to the time gaps where Erika got the book in the base and some other moments. Did have a lot of character building I guess, even if a bit short again. Nice after several chapters ago, that Pinkie Pie officially becomes Erika's new little sister. Lot of d'awwwwwww potential there, assuming we get to see how they become in future chapters. I guess nothing left to do now but see where it goes from here, even though doubt Pinkie Pie will forget about Richard/Stiffhorn and Erika's superiors might not be happy about her cutie mark, I imagine. If it means something to them more about Erika getting too close to the ponies, needing to take care of her, etc.

[ArcCahlon]

love it when you add music cue's it always brings out the emotions more. loved the fact her cutie mark had to do with painting since she use to love it before losing her sister, and now she has them both back (sorta). while it was a short chapter it was packed with a lot of insight and emotion on erika's behalf. really looking forward to seeing how this all plays out.

[ZephyrStrife]

I... I... THIS WAS SO BEAUTIFUL!!!! I... I just need a minute before I can keep reading...