Battlemage
"So, what do we do?" Rarity asked while keeping her sight on Twilight's parents, floating in front of her, high above ground. "Couldn't you teleport them away?"
"I told you, the sphere around them is a disruption spell. It prevents us from getting them out just as well as it keeps them from teleporting away. If I had time, I could find exactly what spell and frequency it uses and get rid of it," Twilight explained.
"How long would that take?" Rarity replied.
"An hour, maybe more if the spell is more complex," she let out in a sigh. "I would have to try different spells and see how it affects..."
Rarity interrupted her by pointing at the two floating ponies. "They are all in sweat from keeping that spell for hours! I doubt they would last that long!"
"Whoever did this is a monster!" Twilight cringed. "They drop their shield and they fall down to their death, or they stay inside and die from exhaustion when they run out of magic."
"Can't we move them here? Then they could drop their protection spell safely." Rarity proposed.
Twilight shook her head. "No, for the same reason, the disruption field messes up any spell that... touches... it." She hardly finished her sentence and the last words were barely audible.
"Twilight?"
The purple unicorn had that expression when she was deeply thinking. She turned around and looked at Azure that was sitting behind them. A smile slowly crept on Twilight's face as her brain started calculating the magic needed. "What?" the confused filly said as Twilight walked up to the edge of the gallery.
"You know, your teleportation spell isn't really one. I think the better term would be displacement." The filly appeared confused by the remark. "If I can displace the whole volume... My parents, their shield and the disruption spell... It could... It will work!" Twilight explained with some forced optimism. "As long as my spell doesn't touch the others," she let out in a whisper.
"That's a huge volume!" Rarity countered. "That outter spell is almost the size of a bathroom, do you think you have enough left to do that?"
Twilight tried to count all the spells she performed today. Between the reality bubble, the changeling spell and the numerous teleportation; from Ponyville to Canterlot, to her parent's house and the dozen required to find a safe spot in the mountain, she should have been exhausted. She wouldn't mind going in a warm bed for a long night, but she expected to be in far worse shape than she was right now.
"There's only one way to find out," Twilight said as she readied herself while facing her parents.
"You're sure?" Rarity asked while putting a hoof on her friend's shoulder. Performing a spell that one didn't have the magic to supply was a dangerous task. At best, the incantation would simply fail before being released. For more complex one, the spell's components could keep draining the caster until the required energy is met. Without magic, the only source available would be the caster's life force.
"Rarity, I'm fine and there is no other solution. You can't cast it and Azure doesn't have the magic pool needed for it," she explained while pushing her friend back.
"We could get the Princess here," Rarity countered.
Twilight thought about it for a moment. "No time, it could take a while to find them and managed to teleport back here." She tried to display a reassuring smile. "If I fail, we go get her, alright?"
The white unicorn gave up, walked back and sat beside the blue filly. "And you, what do you think?" Rarity asked.
"I... I don't know," Azure replied unsure. "I never read anything about disruption spell."
"I meant..." Rarity sighed. "Bookworms," she whispered.
"What?"
Rarity pointed at Twilight, whose horn started glowing brightly. "I meant, do you think she can do it?"
The filly thought of the question with a hoof on her jaw. "Would you give that task to another pony?" She finally asked back.
Rarity took a deep breath and hummed. "No. No I guess I wouldn't." She eyed the filly. "You're pretty smart for your age." Sparkles showed up in Azure's eyes before focusing back on Twilight.
Twilight had the spell's structure nailed down for a while now, but wasn't releasing it. She kept adding magic to it, as for any spell that involve a volume of space, anytime the caster would double its initial radius meant adding nine times more magic, or more depending on the spell complexity. After what felt an eternity, her spell was roughly the size of the bubble she had to engulf. She felt the exhaustion creeping on as her knees started shaking.
Can't take any chances.
She felt it wasn't enough, as any imprecision at placing the spell in space would cause them to intersect and all her effort would be wasted by the disruptive magic. She needed her spell to be bigger. She had no room for error and she could only cast something like that once, so she kept going. Twilight clenched her teeth, closed her eyes and kept adding more. Her coat was wet in sweat and her muscles start burning as she felt she was now draining beyond her magic reserve. Her whole body was now shaking in pain. Fully rested, she was confident that she could have done it without so much effort. After all, she had lifted that Ursa Minor over a year ago.
The moment she couldn't take it anymore, she opened her eyes and let the spell go to its destination. Just as she did, she started falling to her side but didn't react as her focus remained on her parents. She felt another body break her fall, she didn't need to look to know that Rarity was keeping her up.
The spell started to take effect, slowly ripping pieces of the fabric of space as two volumes were forced to overlap each other. The sphere, big enough to encompass her parents, their shield, the blue draining and disruption spells, slowly shimmered like a crystal in the dark cavern.
After what felt like ages, the sphere started to disappear, as if someone was ripping the wallpapers off a wall. It was soon gone, sending its content to a place Twilight knew to be safe, the Princess' apartments. The cavern was now much darker as there wasn't any spells to light it up. Twilight released her breath, unaware she had kept it in since she released her spell. Even after running the marathon of the leaves, she didn't felt that tired. Now the only thing on her mind was to go home and sleep for a week, and hopefully forget about the whole story.
"Dear, you never cease to amaze me," Rarity said with a large smile. "But right now, you look terrible and I'm not really found of all the sweat."
"Sorry," Twilight replied automatically. With some efforts, she managed to calm her shaking knees long enough to sit down properly. Her head spun as the heat generated by her horn started to diffuse in her body. A single very strong spell had simply no time to dissipate the residual energy, and now she could feel a headache building up as it propagated along her forehead into in her brain.
"That was... so awesome!" Azure cheered while jumping in front of Twilight. "It was huge!" she said while doing a wide motion with her front hooves. The quick motion of the filly wasn't helping Twilight's head and the walls were slowly rotating in front of her eyes. White sparkles were flying through her vision in chaotic motions wherever she looked. She lay down and closed her eyes, letting the coldness of the stone floor eat away the fever that always results of powerful spells. "Twilight?" the filly asked concerned.
"Azure, come here," Rarity asked. The filly trotted to her. "You know a lot about magic. I'm sure you know what happen when a unicorn cast a spell that requires a huge amount of power?"
"The excess of magic may turn into heat as..." she started as if she was reading from a school tome, then realization struck, "Oh!"
"Yes," Rarity replied with a smile. "Just give Twilight a moment."
Once during her training, Princess Celestia made her cast spells after spells for almost a whole day only to fully understand the signs that came with being drained of magic. Every magic beginner's book warned the junior spellcaster of the danger linked to going beyond one's limits. After that trail, the fever and the feeling of being empty of energy took almost a week to subside. The whole time, anytime she wasn't at the court, Celestia sat beside her bed in silence.
The third day, she asked the Princess if she did something wrong. Her teacher smiled and explained that she didn't expect the filly to put so much effort into it. She added to the young student that she should see that as a learning experience, something that no book could explain as precisely and to memorize how everything felt. The naive one replied that if magic exhaustion was that painful, she would never use that much magic ever again. The ageless pony looked away in her thought.
Sometime, you don't have the luxury of choosing.
For Twilight, the cold stones felt like a huge relief from the insane day. One moment the stones under her were slowly heating up while cooling her body, the next they were once again fully cold. A small scream from beside her forced her to open her eyes. She quickly realized that something moved her without her noticing it, she was not longer on the third floor of the room but on the ground at the bottom. She tried to stand up, but her legs didn't accept the quick motion. She felt back and decide that only moving her head around would have to do for now. A quick look toward the source of the scream showed that both Rarity and Azure followed her in whatever transported here down there. The two were looking in front of them and Rarity was using her body to protect the filly from whatever her sight was locked on.
Twilight turned her head once again, happy that movement didn't mean a wave of nausea. Her sight finally stopped on a pony that was standing in the shadows cast by the upper floors. Then it hit her, obviously whoever was keeping her parent prisoner had good chance of being around to wait for her parent's death. If she was that pony, she would have tried to detect the presence of intruders and teleport to them... or teleport them to her. She suddenly felt stupid from not planning a way to leave this place quickly after saving her parents.
Feeling a bit of her strength return, she decided that whoever the pony was, she would be better facing it on her hooves. She managed to stand up and after a moment, felt stable enough that she wouldn't fall back. After all, it wasn't the first time that Twilight experienced magical exhaustion.
"Who are you?" Twilight shouted. As if the dark figure noticed her for the first time, he walked toward them. Entering the middle lit part of the room, Twilight heard Rarity gasp.
"You!" Rarity hissed with disgust. Twilight looked attentively at the white stallion with a blond mane that had showed up and while she felt some kind of déjà vu, she couldn't name that pony.
"Well, I don't know how you managed to save your parent, Sparkle," he said with a mean voice while keeping his head raised high. "But it's only a small delay." He looked at Rarity and Azure while a smile slowly crept on his face. "Three pains in the flank reunited at the same place, such a gift." He stared at Azure. "You, little brat! You cost me my best assassin."
"I knew you were a jerk the first time I've met you Blueblood!" Rarity shouted.
"Blueblood?" Twilight asked confused.
"That's 'Prince Blueblood' for you, peasant," he replied. "But it's not like you would remember me. We might have lived in the same castle for over a decade, your only friends were Celestia," he spitted out with rage, "and books."
"What do you have against the Princesses? That doesn't make any sense! You're of royal blood, why would you do all this?" Twilight asked back, her mind unable to find logic or structure in his actions.
He tilted his head and displayed a fake smile. "You're right, it doesn't make sense. But, for you, Sparkle, it doesn't have to!" he said while quickly lowering his horn.
The blue bolt of magic took Twilight by surprise, her mind still trying to decipher the motive behind his actions. It was a few hooves away from hitting her when a chunk of rock flew in front of her chest and blocked the attack. Twilight stumbled back a few steps trying to focus on what happened. "Thanks Rarity! Nice reflex!"
Rarity let the stone drop off her magic grip. "That's the result of having an overexcited filly at home all day," she explained with a weak smile.
"I'll thanks Sweetie Bell later," Twilight added while spreading her hooves to have a more balanced position, ready for any other attack. She noticed that Blueblood wasn't really in a hurry of doing another move.
He sat down and clapped his front hooves. "Bravo!" he said in a sarcastic tone.
"Surrender!" Twilight shouted back. "It's three versus one. You stand no chance against us."
Blueblood snorted at the weak retort. "A foal, a dress maker and a unicorn empty of magic. Sure, I feel like my life is in danger." Twilight hated to admit that he was right and he did manage to capture her parents. A sparkle of hope appeared in her mind, if he battled her parents today that meant he could also be exhausted. His smile widened as he noticed her staring at him and as if he was reading her thought, "Don't even think about it. Your parents offered no real resistance beside their pesky force fields. I didn't even break a sweat. The royal bloodline does offer some advantages."
Twilight cringed at the retort, but she had to admit he didn't look exhausted. She dived deep inside herself, trying to find any drop of magic. She looked at every corners of her being and places she knew didn't store any, just in case. She hated to admit that she did manage to empty all her reserves today. However, she was somewhat relieved that her last spell didn't dig in her life force or she wouldn't be standing right now.
She was about to give up when a small sparkle caught her inner eye. Magic! There was no doubt about its existence, but she was sure she had looked at that spot before and it was as dry as the badlands. Any pony's reserve would replenish itself over time but any real recovery would come from a good night of rest. How could she miss some like that?
She took that droplet and carefully brought it to her horn, trying to be as ready as possible for Blueblood's next move. Just as she was about to exit her inner self, another sparkle caught her eye. Could it really be? At the same spot where she found that bit of magic laid another one. Her analytic mind tried to find an explanation for that odd event but couldn't find any; magic simply doesn't appear like that, by magic! The process of a pony converting food into energy and then that energy to magic was very well known and documented. Magic appearing like that out of nowhere was scientifically impossible.
Her thought were interrupted when Blueblood spoke again. "Dear dress maker, let's see if you can do anything against that!" On his last word, his horn lit up and fired a bolt of magic upward. The vault over their heads cracked and a huge slab of rock was hurled down. Rarity tried to react but she simply didn't have the experience or the magic skill to prevent such a mass from falling. She pushed all her telekinetic ability toward that rock, hoping to be able to at least deflect it. Seeing it wasn't slowing down, she closed her eyes and waited for the inevitable while trying to protect Azure with her body. After what appeared to be a too long delay, the cave roared as the mass of rock crashed against a wall. Feeling no pain beside her ringing ears, she slowly opened one eye. Seeing no direct danger, she looked around and finally found the slab of stone embedded in the wall to the right of Blueblood.
The mad unicorn was grinning as his horn slowly lost his blue glow. "Now, that was impressive." Rarity wondered for a moment if the prince actually changed the rock's trajectory until she noticed Twilight's horn's glow.
"Twilight!" Rarity shouted while taking a step toward her purple friend. She was stopped in her tracks by a purple glow as her and Azure was lifted from the ground.
Twilight looked over her shoulder. "I got this Rarity," she claimed while trying to sound reassured. Rarity wasn't fooled and could clearly see the exhaustion in her friend's eyes. However, she could do little as the telekinetic field floated her and the blue filly to the far corner of the room. When her friend's magic finally dropped her, she wasted no time and tried to dash back to her side but only managed to crash face first in a purple sphere that appeared around the two ponies.
Rarity saw stars as her head slowly stopped spinning. That fooled librarian had locked her and Azure in a force field, no doubt to protect them. She hit the field with her front hooves in vain. Force field was Twilight's family specialty, and this one was particularly solid. She knew what it meant, Twilight would use her life force to save them and she couldn't accept that!
Once sure they were safe under a layer of her best shield spell, Twilight brought her focus back to Blueblood, only to see the cursed stallion, once more, send a bolt of magic upward. She readied herself, hoping she wouldn't have to deflect another mountain, but the bolt went way over her head. Too late she noted its trajectory as it hit the vault above her friends. The wall cracked in half and the upper portion crashed down on the trapped ponies. "Twilight!" Azure shouted before being buried alive. As the dust settled, in horror she could see no trace of her shield.
"They are fine," Blueblood claimed. "For now. Who know how long your force field will hold."
Twilight clenched her jaw to prevent it from shacking while she faced the stallion once more. "It will hold as long as needed," she replied in between her teeth, not sure at all of her statement.
The prince laughed, not threaten one bit by Twilight's presence. "Maybe, but the air they have under that might not last as long."
The purple mare growled as her brain automatically computed the time they had left. The move that she thought would protect her friends was instantly flipped around, turned into a race against the clock. She could feel the force field still linked to her magic reserve, draining whatever was left as the mass of rock was pushing against it. She couldn't explain it, but the field was holding and even after pushing away a bolder ten time her mass, she could still find some. A part of her brain warned her that she was most likely draining part of herself that wasn't meant to be used. She quickly pushed that thought away, if she had a choice she would take it, but right now her friends needed her no matter what.
She gathered any droplet of magic she could find and fired it in a purple bolt. To her surprise, the attack was more powerful that she expected but Blueblood didn't appear impressed as he conjured a flat angular field to easily deflect it to his side. The bolt bounced off and exploded against a stone pillar. Blueblood stared for a moment at the field he created as a crack had appeared at the place Twilight's bolt hit it. With a swift move of his head, he dispelled the field. "Interresting," he claimed with a dangerous smile. "You might be more interesting to play with then I thought."
Twilight quickly checked that the force field protecting her friends was still active. It was still strong and somehow was still draining magic from reserve that twice now she looked into to find empty. She looked up to Blueblood. He was ready, standing up with his horn aimed at her. "It has been a very long time since I had the chance of a real magic duel."
The next bolt that he shot toward her was much faster than the previous one and was pulsing with something in it. Unable to cast a defense in time, Twilight dodged to her side. The bolt disintegrated the rock she used to stand on, it wasn't a bolt of simple magic, but a complex spell crafted to kill. She was ready for the next one as her own square of force field deflected it.
And the next one... and the next... and the next. Blueblood gave her no chance to retaliate as he kept firing bolts of magic toward her. She was blocking them with surprising ease, but she couldn't continue endlessly like that, her friend's time was counted. She needed to attack back. Gathering once more magic from that mysterious source, she teleported a dozen meters to her left and shot a bolt of magic as quickly as possible. The bolt hit the wall with no Blueblood in sight, he teleported away!
Spinning around, she readied her force field just in time to be stuck in his telekinetic field. He fired a bolt just as she teleported away from his grasp. To her surprise, the bolt trajectory changed, followed her and struck her in the chest before she could react. The impact left her breathless for a few seconds, but she managed to stand strong on her hooves. Quickly checking for damage, she found that it would hurt for a while to lie down but nothing major was broken.
"I'm sure you can do better!" he shouted with the same mad smile. He shot another bolt and just as Twilight was about to intercept it with her force field, it changed its trajectory and once again hit her on the chest. She took a step back as she started to see stars. The spell wasn't strong, but she couldn't take many like that.
The idea of putting a full force field around herself crossed her mind, but she would be unable to attack back. If she was to save herself and her friends, she had to defeat him. Sadly, Blueblood appeared to have much more experience with direct magic duel then her. Celestia never trained her in the kind of magic duel where your opponent tries to kill you. She was used to civil duel, where two unicorns would cast more and more complex spells to find who the better magician is.
Once more he aimed at her and his horn glowed. Twilight readied her magical shield, not knowing what to expect, but at least she was sure to be able to protect herself from previous attack type. The bolt of magic he sent wasn't very fast, but after traveling half the distance, it blew in a thousand sharp shards of magic. The purple mare tried to react quickly by expanding her shield and while it blocked most of them, some managed to pass and dug deep in her left flank. She couldn't hold back a bark of pain. Giving a quick glance to her behind, she saw that the spell left a dozen small dots of blood on her cutie mark, as if someone repeatedly probed her with a needle. Her rear left leg was in pain and wouldn't react as quickly.
"Why?" She screamed, hoping to get an answer.
"Because!" He screamed back while casting another spell. This time, no bolt came and the moment Twilight wondered what the spell was, she noticed her hooves were now frozen on the floor. The moment she lower her head to melt that ice away, she felt a telekinesis field appear around her throat. She didn't try to dispel it, instead she grabbed with her own levitation a nearby rock and shot it as fast as he could toward her opponent.
The rock caught Blueblood by surprise and stunned him a moment long enough for Twilight to free herself. A red line of blood was visible on the side of his head. Twilight never wanted to hurt anypony, however she was running out of options and time. She was trying to come up with a solution, but train of thoughts were only finding dead-end.
He shocked his head to clear his mind. "You're weak," he said. "You missed another opportunity to attack me." Without waiting, he attacked again with chained bolt of magic. The attack was aggressive and Twilight was once again forced on the defensive. She summoned a second force field just in time to block a rock thrown at her. She took a step back, then another and another. She was forced to expand her force fields to block the rain of rocks and bolts coming from every direction.
Her next step put her in the corner of the room. She couldn't even remember how she ended up cornered like that. The deluge of attacks was continuing and her force fields were starting to show sign of weakness under the stress. She felt hurt, her body ached and she had no idea how to save her friends, let alone saving herself. She was about to give up when it happens. Similar to when someone closes the lights in a room, you only notice it was there the moment it's gone.
There was a small blue light in her mind, sometime with time she got used to and didn't notice while she was focused on something else. With it gone, its absence was like a small black void in the middle of herself. Her eyes went wide at the realization, her mental link with Azure was gone. They should have had more air than that in her protective shield. Or did they? Was the shield still up? It was supposed to hold longer! She couldn't think clearly, she couldn't even check if the spell was still functional as attacks continued to hammer her protections.
No! No! No no no no no no... No!
With tears in her eyes, something inside her broke. Something she didn't even know existed. The white explosion of pure magic that radiated from her dissolved her force fields as well as Blueblood's attacks and protections. The white stallion was pushed violently against the wall by the blast. When he managed to open his eyes, it was as if a miniature sun was radiating from within the purple mare. He tried to cast a spell, only to find his magic disturbed the moment it left his horn. He tried to cast the fastest magic bolt he could, but the missile dissolved in midair way before reaching its target.
For the first time, he found himself without options and he didn't like it at all.
Twilight was floating toward the middle of the roam, her brain locked on two tasks, stopping Blueblood and saving her friends. She couldn't think clearly as her mind was as white as the light that was filling the room.
He must not be able to cast spells was the closest she got to a coherent thought.
Just as her brain came up with that much information, the magic flow around her pulsed in response. Blueblood was almost back on his hooves when he felt something change. In front of his eyes, something long and white fell down on the floor. The moment he started to wonder what it was, he collapse on the floor, shaking violently.
Almost as if she was reading a checklist, Twilight came to the next item; saving her friends. Once again, the magic sent a wave outward. The rocks and the force field under them vanished, disintegrated, exposing two ponies. Rarity was wrapped around Azure, as if her body could protect the filly from the crushing weight of the now gone rocks. It took a moment for the white mare's eyes to adjust to the bright light that was filling the room.
Finding her friends safe and no more important item on her list, Twilight let out a breath of relief. It was also the moment the magic disappeared, letting her fall hard on the floor. But she had passed out long before touching the stone.
Rarity rushed to Twilight's body, but was beaten to it by Azure.
"Twilight!" the filly screamed but no answer came back. Fearing the worst, Azure hugged the purple mare.
Finally close enough, Rarity noticed her friend was still breathing. She carefully took Azure off Twilight with her telekinesis. "She's alright," she said softly. "But if you hug her like that, she won't be for long."
Turning around to face Rarity, Azure was crying. "You're sure?" She asked in tears. "You saw it too! She must have drained her life to win! It's... she's..."
Rarity hugged her. "There! Twilight is tougher than that," she explained, not really convinced herself. "She is still breathing, and if she is, it means there is still enough force in her," she said while giving the filly her best smile. Something moved in the corner of her sight.
Her smile disappeared as she scanned the darkness. Something white at the end of the room was moving, kicking. "You!" Rarity screamed while standing up. She walked in the direction of Blueblood, who was on his side, his legs kicking the air as if he was trying to stand up. She held her head low, ready to protect or to attack.
"Bastard!" she screamed. "Twilight might have been too good to end you, but I'm not as nice." While she thought she was prepared for anything, when she finally came close to him, the sight of Blueblood made her stop in her track.
The stallion was on his side, his legs taken by spasms. He was breathing erratically and his eyes were similar to a crazy animal, rolling in their sockets without conscious control. Rarity noticed his horn was missing, a trickle of blood dripping through his mane, forming a pool under his head. She had heard what damage to a unicorn's horn could do; the top of the list being a neural shock but she wasn't expecting something like that.
Azure had come beside Rarity while her focus was on the stallion. Noticing the filly, she turned around. "Azure, please, can you stay with Twilight?" She asked with a firm tone. Azure nodded, understanding it wasn't time to argue. She walked back to the middle of the room and sat down beside Twilight, not leaving Rarity from her sight.
After a moment, Blueblood stopped kicking. For some reason, Rarity was sure he was trying to say something, but couldn't as if he had lost control over his body. After all he did, she was ready to kill him, but seeing him like that, helpless and defenseless, she couldn't do it.
She cursed under her breath, happy that Azure wasn't close enough to hear it. Why her generosity had to kick in the worst moment? That monster didn't deserve it. She sat down her sight locked on him, unsure what to do next.
"T... tss... Tat..." Blueblood said, as if he was trying his voice for the first time. Rarity had to admit he did sound weird, but she was no expert on horn damage. For all she knew, it could be a side effect she never heard of.
Blueblood closed his mouth, as if he was exasperated by his vocal cords. He closed his eyes and after an eternity of trying out, with a voice more suited to a foal than a stallion, managed a soft "Thanks."
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Once again a huge thanks to Shutaro and Obsidian Raindrop for the pre-reading. You both have a patience far beyond I would ever have.
How did that chapter ended up at 5k+ words? No clue.
I think my ability to write interesting magic fight isn't very good.
And yeah... It's "kinda" a cliff hanger. But not that much, no?
An update?
"Thanks."?
Oh my, is something higher working here? Powerful enough to control ponies?
Wait, why do I ask? You won't confirm nor deny, because spoilers...
And Twilight is scary here. She merely needs to formulate her wish and poof... granted...
1734388
I wouldn't give your pre-readers armored tons of destruction, also know as huge tanks.
1738020 Why I shouldn't thanks my... oh.
Well, they would deserve one anyway, since they manage to fix my shitty English.
As for Twilight, I only wanted her to re-experience her magic flare from her entrance exam.
1738040
,
Yeah, sorry, that was kind of rude on my part...
About Twi and her flare; I wonder if she's going to try embracing it.
And just how big is this pool of magic she has available? Time will tell.
I guess Blueblood is no longer... *puts on glasses* HORNY! dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra_dealwithit.png Yeeeeeeeeeeeah!
I love this story. Very nice update.
1497632 It was before Discord. Equestria was already founded when Discord showed up. And it was after Discord showed up that Celestia and Luna emerged from whatever heavenly abode they'd been watching everything unfold.
1738573 Do you have any citation for that statement?
1504104 But it was the power of the Elements that sealed him. On her own, Twilight was as utterly powerless as the rest of them. Her Failsafe Spell was useless. She couldn't resist Discord's chaos magic in the slightest regard. And recall that with a mere snap of his fingers, Discord relieved her of her horn, and all her magical abilities. And the moment she doubted her friendships, she turned grey. Only Fluttershy required a direct, forceful application of mind-altering power from Discord. If we were to look at it that way, Fluttershy was the strongest. But, that was merely because he toyed with the others until they gave in and became frustrated when she wouldn't. It had nothing to do with power. The only thing strong about Fluttershy was, oxymoronically, her meekness.
The Elements are the only weapons effective against Discord. Nothing else at all shows any affect upon him.
This story is making some assumptions that simple common sense analysis disproves.
1738613 My question was more about the historical statement you presented. You said Equestria existed before Discord showed up, my story goes the other way around.
As for Twilight being powerless against Discord, I never claimed otherwise. I never said the Elements of Harmony were useless.
Please, what are the assumptions this story is making that common sense would disprove?
...
*clears throat*
This is so great! I don't even have words for this! I just can't...
1738678 Exams? I can understand your pain and your joy.
1738580 I have the timeline, and it was one of the things I'd asked Lauren Faust about during my chat with her at the Brony Documentary dinner the night before Bronycon. I'd already worked out a rational timeline and it matched her internal canon of events. The Hearth Warming story is set before Celestia and Luna came to power, as they began to rule right after defeating Discord, meaning the 3 tribes would have been united by default after that time.
If the 3 tribes had united AFTER Discord's reign, under the auspices of Celestia and Luna, there would have been no reason for the Hearth Warming story to be made up in the first place as it was. A legend arising from that altered origin would more likely have revolved around a central precept of chaos being evil and order being good. Remember, legends arise out of the circumstances the peoples in a region find themselves in. The Hearth Warming story does not fit the discorded Equestria nor any aspect of its resolution.
Also, bear in mind that a coverup on this scale never works. One has only to look through the history on any nation to learn that no matter how violent the repression, the truth always bleeds out into a sizeable fraction of the population, which is why we know of these things today. If the repressors had been successful, we'd know nothing.
Also, we must look at rationale behind a coverup. What is the point? Discord's statue was right out in the open and there were stained glass windows depecting him in the castle. If there was any attempt at covering up history, one would think his place of imprisonment would be far more secure (say, in the caves under the castle where nopony could ever find him) and all physical records of his existence the Princesses had access to would have been destroyed. His story as it stands could have easily been manipulated into pro-Princess propaganda. Simple the fact that they alone stopped him would be enough to build a monumental degree of support. There is absolutely no reason to make up an alternate history that, if uncovered, would then lead to doubts.
And if I, a simple human of 36 years can consider these points, I would think that a powerful alicorn with many long years already behind her would be more than clever and wise enough to reach the same conclusions.
Too little credit is given to Celestia's intelligence and experience in far too many stories. One does not rule in peace for a thousand years unless one is doing things that work well. The human race barely manages a few decades at a time, with wars and ruin in between. This would seem to indicate that the Princess is quite a bit wiser at ruling mortals than we are at ruling ourselves.
There is also Celestia's word that she and Luna intervened only when they saw how unpleasant Discord made life for the ponies.
is this the end?
1738762
I won't answer to that, because it falls into the "I heard that" and "X said Y". Until Hasbro publish something to make any historical event canon or otherwise, it remains a wish. Lauren had planned a lot of thing for the serie, but most remained on the drawing board. Because she planned something doesn't make it any more canon. For all I care, I could flag the story "Alternative universe" if it would please you.
Why there would have been no reason? I thought I actually gave a good one in my story. Survival against a devastated nature by uniting their efforts. And I never said the play was "made up", but like any legend, it tends to be deformed by time to only carry the important bits.
Really? You would tell me that we have a very clear picture of what happened two thousand years ago in our own history? That the few documents that survived that long, found here and there are actually rock solid proof? Coverup work pretty well for stories... From your point of view, I would guess the story in Assassin's Creed must sound pretty stupid too. We could learn tommorow that Jesus never existed... Well, there's a ton of people that would be disappointed, and that would make for a very impressive "coverup", or at that point, is it more historical innacuracy brought that time itself?
Most people have no clue why WW1 broke out, and that wasn't a thousand years ago. People have a very short memory and tend to adapt it to fit their idea or pre-conception. "It's only an old mare's tail"
After all, the winner write the history.
But I never said Celestia actually covered anything, did I? You have to remember that most ponies didn't even know about Nightmare Moon or Discord's history, even while they had clear sign of their past in their faces. What kind of sign does that give you about ponies' historical accuracy when the biggest vilain of their past is totally forgetten for what they truly did and only becomes symbols? Hell! Ponies didn't even know Discord's statue was actually the real thing turned to rock.
You should know that the best way to kill history, is to simply let it go to the wave of time and not try to cover it up.
Again, you assume thing I never said or never even implied. I totally agree that she had experience in ruling that country... but two thousand years ago, she didn't have that experience. This story only have her explaining some of her past mistakes. She is far from perfect, after all her sister did turn into Nightmare Moon right under her nose, she did fail to save her and had to banish her.
I didn't say that. For all I know, it could have been months or years of epic adventure to craft or find the Element of Harmony.
So far, you brought a lot of argument, but very little proof or fondation for them. I'm under the feeling you don't like the tone I gave to this story, and it's perfectly fine, not everybody like the same thing. But if you want to present argument that the backstory I've put up is illogical or incoherent, I would ask a lot more from you to prove me that.
1738857 2 more chapters, from what I planned, to wrap things up.
1738921 Nightmare Night. The ponies DID know about Nightmare Moon before she appeared. Also, Twilight found the storybook with her story quite easily. Again, there was no coverup either deliberate or passive, merely a seeming disinterest by most ponies in their nation's history. This actually makes sense, given that they've had a thousand years of peace. Look at how little interest there is for history in our world, with its pages saturated with one bloody conflict after another. Everything is going great for the ponies, so why look so far into the past to learn irrelevant unpleasantries about things that haven't come up for dozens of generations? We cannot even be sure that they aren't taught history in school, but, like so many in our own world, completely ignore and forget what they learn. Indeed, we saw that Cheerilee was teaching the students about Discord. Now, perhaps it was lost to time that the statue WAS actually Discord, but the notion of him was clearly retained within the general educational system. And the foals are stil yet in early grade school-level education; that they are even being told what a draconequus is at that age is something I find revealing. A curious student would certainly use that unusual information to seek a deeper truth. Who can say into what depths of detail high-school or university studies in Equestria delve?
You bring up the start of WWI, which is (or at least was when I went to school) something taught in every world history class. There was no hiding it. We all had to do a paper on it! (And, as I said, I hardly recall a thing now, 20 years later.) But we were given all the facts. Retention of said facts was our own responsibility. There's also only so much time that non-historians can devote to the innumerable events of history. I'm quite sure that the historian ponies in Equestria are quite a bit more informed than the general population, not by any thought of coverup whatsoever, but by lack or time or interest in the subject.
We have limited backstory to go by as it is. The show is primarily about the characters and their adventures, not about giving us a detailed Equestrian History 101 lecture; and so I'm going by what canon we've been given, and assuming it is accurate. That's the only reasonable way to conclude anything with the show. We can't exactly waltz into the Canterlot library and read their entire history for ourselves. Anything else is akin to the Area 51 alien conspiracy theory, where lack of evidence is somehow construed as proof positive.
You're making things up which have no basis in the canon. Where is any evidence for what you are claiming in this story? In the match of facts supported by canon, the ball is clearly in my court. You may make reasons up behind the events in your story, but there is no possible way you can claim they're supported by the actual show.
Nightmare Moon wasn't a mistake. Celestia plead with Luna, and Luna refused to listen. That isn't a mistake, that's compassion. People like to then make up stories where NM killed thousands of ponies in her battle with Celestia... and again, I would like to point out that all of that is utter conjecture without a shred of fact to support it. Given how NM 'fought' with the Bearers when she returned, it certainly gives credence to the general notion that even as NM, Luna was unwilling to seriously harm the weaker ponies. She could have simply outright killed the Bearers when if she were truly that possessed by darkness and hatred.
As for banishment, you forget that Celestia only had partial control of the Elements. When they fought Discord, BOTH sisters used the Elements to turn him to stone, meaning they each had approximately a 1/2 connection to the Elements' powers. She needed Luna to use them as well for the full effect. Rather than let the conflict escalate, she used what powers of the Elements she could to do the only thing she could to protect her ponies and to save Luna from herself, likely before she committed mass murder which would have rendered her irredeemable.
I'm frankly amazed Celestia could use them at all, given her heart must have been broken at the time. To pull together the strength of will to push so much power through the Elements in spite of the bitterness and grief which would surely have polluted the power of Harmony... Celestia has far greater emotional fortitude than most. Her utilization of the power of darkness and hate when explaining dangers of Sombra to Twilight gives a clue to this as well. She can call upon dark powers at will without being consumed by them. This is something only a being with incredible strength of character could accomplish.
1738924 YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY!
1739610 You're pretty much doing assumptions the same way I do. Because your conclusion differ from mine doesn't mean one is more valid than an other as both are way out of the canon scope. Bulding on top of canon information doesn't garanty that the derived story would be anymore canon. I like my stories when the parts make sense and follow a logical chain of events, but mostly that a character could explain why it happened. I build on the part of the story that are in the shadows, the part we don't know and were never mentionned in the show and twist the information that could clearly be historical fallacy or time deformation. For example, because Cheerilee talk about the notion of discord, representated by the statue, in no way imply that the ponies' history remember what really happened back then. They remember his species and what he represented. Nothing else is explained in the show about the historical value of that character, what he did or even how he was beaten. The Princess explains that they used the Elements to banish him a long time ago, but we don't know if the history books actually remember that... But since Celestia had to explain it as the ponies didn't understand what was going on... And that's it! It's quite easy to extrepolate scenario based on that kind of limited information. It's also why you see so many fic about what happened between Celestia and Luna, nopony know beside the Princesses. Even Twilight's book about NNM was shady at best about what happened and was presented under the form a legend. That was a thousand years ago, so double that time and historical accuracy is out the window.
LOL
! oh yeah smart guy, very wise move taking on Twilight
wonder what he would have done differently IF he had known about the extent of Twilight's TRUE abilities. probably soiled himself when he found himself in a duel he decided was to be to the end
considering that her FULL reserve is now at her disposal and Celestia herself would be the only single pony with a snowballs chance in a one-on-one
1740135 Well, I see spells similar to science... It does take you a specific level to understand quantum mechanic.
Or another example, I understand video game engine on an instinctive level. Which is really not the case for most, but on the other hoof, I can't draw even if my life would depend on it.
And yeah... if you check the comments, even mine, you would see that grammar (well English mostly) is far from being my strengths. I only got pre-readers for the last 3-4 chapters, and even them cannot spot all the errors I write.
Yay, finally got around to read this chapter, great to see this story continuing, heh, thanks a lot for putting it up there :)
I did a reread of all the chapters of this sequel to freshen up my memory (soon a month ago I read it ^^ ), not sure if that was a great idea, now Im looking forward for an continuation even more
Eh, but, really, this fic and idea is great. The characters are well-defined, and you also add touches of science into it, which makes it a lot better to read
So, again, thanks a lot for continuing this series, and overall, as stated in some earlier comment too, thanks for putting this up here for everyone to enjoy ;)
M
The story is great but the super long walls of words in the comments is very disheartening, to say the least. Can't we all just enjoy the story?
This is definitely awesome. I liked the magic duel especially. Also, instead of filly Twilight power surge mode, once she got pissed off like that, I imagined her more in Rapidash mode.
Maybe you could use another prereader. I'm currently woking on starting my first story, so maybe I can find inspiration by working on another piece of fiction. Let me know what you think.
wow...
this is awsome, keep up the good work
Blueblood to me seems out of character. In the show he's a pompous pony who wouldn't dare soil his hooves dealing with common trash. It's also hard to believe that a pony like him would have the patience to learn anything beyond what he can use to make himself look pretty.
You should probably go back and fix your mistakes. (Issues with making nouns plural, typos missed by the spellchecker, weird sentence structure and redundancy) If you're using pre-readers, fire them, because they're not doing their job very well. If I were you I'd try to find an editor, hopefully he can help you point out your weak points/areas to work on.
There are plenty of writing guides out there to help you out, if english is your second language. (That's my assumption from reading this, if I'm wrong then I apologize)
1743833 Not a wrong assumption, since I speak French. I had a pre-reader only for the last 3 chapters. So yeah, the first few aren't impressive on a grammar cleanliness.
A sequel?! Why wasn't I informed of this?
I know what I'm doing tonight.
I love it, just as I did it's prequel. Well done, well done that is.
1779342 I'm really aware of grammar and plural stuff. You would be surprised how many people told me, but it's not as easy as you might think for someone whose brain simply refuse to see the errors or when English is not something you speak. However, you shouldn't find many in the 4-5 last chapters of this story, as my pre-reader is pretty good. Of course, with the insane amount of errors I give him, some are bound to slip up.
Missing sentences?
I can miss a word once in a while, but not sentences. Got any examples?
Next, I want you to write a story in French.
1858388
I heard you like hmmm... bananas? 
1927221 What is?
I'm sorry to ask but will this story be updated or will it be permanently incomplete?
2478969 Damn good question.
2478969 and I guess the answer is yes it will be updated..
1779435
New chapter and i reread last ones to refresh my memory and reading comments I could only agree that prereader who would also look over whole story is a must.
Some things that should be fixed in this chapter:
2580470 Thanks plenty. I fixed all of them, I think. With every mistakes, I learn new things.
happens
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Twilight's so BAMF!