Momentary Reprieve
Chapter 11: Momentary Reprieve
How does one find joy when something precious hangs by a thread? There was no solution for the problem at hoof save waiting, and that was something nopony enjoyed. And thus, Silver set out to find some way to alleviate the pervading gloom, if only for a time.
“Applejack, this has got to stop. I know things are serious right now, but I can’t stand seeing everypony so down.”
“Ah feel the same way, sugarcube. You have any ideas? Been dang close to a week now, an’ nothin’s changed. Fluttershy only just got cleared to walk yesterday, an’ even still she only leaves fer necessities. Spends every moment of every day with Whisper.”
“I don’t have much hope for cheering her up. She’s fallen hard fer ‘im.”
“Yer talkin’ like me again,” she chuckled, standing and getting him a fresh cup of cider before returning and resting her head on his shoulders and a hoof on her stomach. “Ah think Fluttershy ain’t as depressed as the rest o’ us. The times I’ve been in t’ see her, she’s smilin’. It ain’t fake, either. She honestly believes that stallion is gonna wake up any day an’ things will be right as rain.”
“Now, if only we could get our friends to have the same attitude.” Applejack sat silent a moment before rapping a hoof on the table and pulling away, beaming ear to ear.
“Ah got it! Silver, it has been a while since you magicked somethin’ interestin’, so why don’t you whip up somethin’ crazy to share? Oh, and make something non-alcoholic fer me an’ Dash. Ain’t fair, not bein’ able t’ drink. What was ah thinkin’...” A kick gave her a none-too-gentle reminder. “All right, now don’t go gettin’ all ornery, ah didn’t mean nothin’ by it. This feller has quite a buck. Must be an earth pony,” she muttered, staring wistfully at Silver’s glass.
“It’ll be worth it, Applejack. And besides,” he added with a wink, “I’ll treat you to a nice glass of Zap...”
“Don’t you mention that moonshine o’ yers, that’s right frightful stuff. It’s too dang good t’ be real and makes me go all crazy, an’ you know it.”
“High praise from the master cider brewer of Ponyville. Come on,” he motioned, draining his glass and standing, helping her to her hooves, “I need an assistant.”
“How scared should I be? What’ve you got in mind?” she asked, trotting after him.
“It should be safe... mostly.”
Silver’s assessment was scarily accurate. No injuries, or spontaneous combustion of his horn, or freezing of his nether regions occurred. What did occur was a dirt devil which nearly gained tornado status and the partial flooding of the lab, both events requiring several hours of cleanup after each. Silver couldn’t help but admire Applejack’s acceptance of his somewhat dangerous talents, dealing with them calm, rationally, and normally with humor. In fact, he had already discussed having a “Best Pregnant Mare” trophy made by his mother to award her after she came to term.
Applejack’s patience aside, he had managed to create two new drinks and one more poison joke additive, and with everything laid out and ready, he sent Applejack to spread the word. Assuming they were having some kind of brunch or something due to being instructed to bring some of their favorite dish, Rainbow Dash brought some of her vegetable stir fry, it being one of the few things she could cook. Twilight brought blueberry ice cream, though this time fortunately without tartar sauce and pickle juice. Her book about pregnancy had been well received, though not initially. After some digging and interviews with other pregnant mares, she compiled the notes and re-released her findings, not as a simple cookbook but as an advice guide primarily focused on unicorns and how not to make their spouses’ lives miserable. Cerulean had been hesitant to have his exploits as a charming mare spread across Equestria, but eventually he relented.
Pinkie, predictably, brought cupcakes. And cake. And brownies. And pretty much one of everything from Sugarcube Corner, including the hard candy. Rarity was much too refined for petty sweets, and thus brought crumpets which were inarguably the most refined of snacks. At Applejack’s request, Big Mac and Crimson joined in for the festivities, along with Berry and Snowdrift. As everypony gathered, he held up a hoof and waited.
“Uh, sugarcube? What’re you doin’?”
“Call it a hunch, sweetheart.” A few more seconds of silence passed before a knock sounded at the door and Celestia strolled in, Luna in tow, though fortunately Discord had been barred from being anywhere near alcohol after the “incident” with the Dragon Liquor at the castle. “Princess, are those...”
“What, have you something against pancakes?”
“No, yer... your Highness, nothin’ at...” Oh, forget it. “Ain’t nothin’ wrong with flapjacks.”
“I should say not,” she stated, minorly annoyed that she had even needed to say it. “Where is Dawn?”
“Pancakes!” The foal fell from the skies like a shooting star, landing face-first on the spongy breakfast and devouring half before she was hastily pulled away by Luna who was having quite a difficult time being stern with the filly.
“Dawn, when I have need of a taste test, I shall summon you. Until then, do not interfere with my breakfast.” The filly showed her remorse by offering what was left of her mouthful in an outstretched hoof, causing laughs from everypony save Twilight, who was thoroughly embarrassed by the foal’s audacity.
“Celestia, what did you bring?” Twilight inquired, quite curious to know what her teacher’s favorite food might be. To her surprise, disappointment, and all around confusion, the regal, majestic princess set down a single, admittedly overripe banana, grinning ear to ear. Silence ensued, and Dawn trotted over to inspect the fruit, looking up at Celestia and then back down again.
“Ewww.” Celestia looked truly hurt as the filly pointed her snout in the air and walked away as everypony erupted into laughter, Luna’s hoots of derision nearly reaching royal Canterlotese volumes. Twilight failed to stifle her snickers before the princess flashed her a most disturbing smile and then stowed the banana out of sight.
“All right, everypony, that’s exactly what we need,” Silver said, wiping tears away as the merriment subsided. “Now, I know things have been pretty dour around here, but from what I’ve heard from Fluttershy, Whisper is a nice stallion. Skittish, but nice. He’s taking one doozy of a nap, so let’s have a good time and laugh extra hard so he can hear, all right?” A rousing cheer and a blast from a party cannon, and the testing was officially underway. The first alchemical wonder he unveiled was “Breezy Blush,” a wind-infused grape wine, as opposed to the mixture of berry juices used for the Shockberry. What exactly the drink did he kept quiet about, handing the cups out one at a time. Pinkie was first, and she quaffed the drink in one go and waited to float away on the wind. Instead, her mane and tail turned to felt, which was even better than flight.
“Hey, the outside of my head looks like the inside of my head! That means I’m twice as smart now! C’mon, Twilight, hit me with your best shot!”
“Ok, Pinkie, divide something by zero.”
“Duh, I don’t even have to think about that, I do that all the time! It’s forty-two, silly. Ask me another!” Rarity was served next as Twilight engaged in a trivia battle of the most nonsensical subjects, and she simply stared at Silver like he had just poured her a glass of mud.
“You cannot honestly expect me to drink such a thing after seeing what kind of disaster it wreaked on Pinkie’s already unsightly mane. No offense, dear.”
“Suit yourself, I won’t force anything, sweetheart. Here you go, Twilight.” Ignoring the pink mare’s ramblings, she drained half the glass and gave Rarity a quizzical look, her lungs filling to the brim but forgetting to release as she sat stunned by the magnificence of Twilight’s mane.
“Rarity, are you ok?” In response, and still not breathing, she pulled out a mirror and held it up for Twilight to see. Her mane seemed to flow on a breeze that wasn’t there, much like Celestia’s, and shimmered like the evening sky, dotted with stars. Dawn was instantly upon her, giving an excited squee of approval before diving for the cup. Twilight quickly yanked it out of the way and finished the rest, whereupon Dawn began to pout.
“Want pretty hair.”
“Silver, you wouldn’t happen to...” she started before he slid a child’s cup over, nodding to Dawn who drained it and watched with fascination as her hair took on the coloration of the morning sky, dotted with shining lights. It was, perhaps, too exciting for the filly, who leapt from the table and began tearing around the room haphazardly, not even noticing the times she fell over after tripping on her wondrous mane. Convinced, Rarity drained hers and promptly fainted at the splendor, her mane reflecting the light like it were made entirely of a midnight amethyst. Cerulean’s looked like a blizzard, Storm’s looked dangerously like an agitated thundercap that flashed with lightning, and Dash’s got twenty percent cooler, maintaining it’s awesome color and and flowing like she was flying at Sonic Rainboom speeds.
Berry had, perhaps, the strangest reaction to the drink, leading her to believe that Silver had somehow tampered with the beverage solely for the purpose of humiliating her. True to her name, her mane fell flat and looked like it was going to wash away, and it took every ponies intervention to keep Pinkie from trying to drink the mare’s mane which looked all the world like pink punch.
“What’s that look for, Berry?” Silver asked, grinning at the mare’s obvious displeasure with the results.
“I just nearly had my mane devoured, what do you think it means?”
“Who knows, it might not have been so bad.”
“Yeah, it’s not so bad!” Pinkie squealed, leaping upright. “I had this weird dream once where there was this pizza...” she started before Twilight tackled her to the ground, forcibly halting the recounting and and whispering dire warnings should she attempt to continue.”
“Twi, what ‘n tarnation is she talkin’ ‘bout?” Applejack inquired, shooting the pair a quizzical glance.
“You really don’t want to know. Pinkie, are you done?”
“What? No way, I was just getting to phase...” Twilight didn’t particularly care for having her hoof in Pinkie’s mouth, convinced that whatever enzymes went into digesting her food so fast would likely dissolve her hoof in a matter of minutes, and thus simply put up a noise canceling barrier around the mare who chatted to her hearts content. Snowdrift shook his head and downed his, smirking at Berry who clearly thought he had received the better end of the deal.
Like a wind blown tundra, his mane turned pure white, billowing of its own accord and seeming give off snowflakes that dissipated after a moment or two. Big Mac and Crimson took theirs at the same time, and both were more than satisfied with the results.
“Darlin’, it’s a good thing Applebloom ain’t around t’ see yer mane all aglitter like that. She’d be right jealous.”
“I must say, it never quite crossed my mind, but that pompadour is quite comely on you. Silver, I think I’m going to need some of this to go.”
“Eeyup.” They turned as the last pair, the royal sisters, drank their fill and looked at each other with confusion.
“Sister, thine mane is yet unchanged. Perhaps it is not strong enough for you? What of mine?”
“It is still the same. Silver, you flatterer.”
“Uh, beg yer pardon, your Highness, but what do you mean?”
“Nothing, Silver, do not worry yourself over it. Come now, what is this other creation? There must be a reason we brought all this food. Oh, Twilight, do remove your spell from Pinkie. She looks a little anxious.” Anxious wasn’t quite the word, as Pinkie was dangerously close to having a meltdown from being ignored and recounting her tragic tale. Twilight quickly removed the hex and offered a comforting hoof.
“I didn’t mean... to eat...” Twilight gently placed a hoof over her mouth with her other around the mares shoulders, nodding to Silver who poured a glass and raised it for all to see. The fluid was utterly uninteresting to look at, as it was clear like water.
“Vivacious Vodka, for those wondering. Quite a curious drink, if I do say so myself. May I have a volunteer?”
“Do you have a ‘pregnant mare’ version?”
“That I do, Rainbow Dash. One moment.” Pulling out a different cask, he poured another cup and continued. “So, what is it that you brought to dine on, Rainbow Dash?”
“Stir fry, ‘cause it’s simple.”
“Excellent, may I see some?” She slid the plate over to him, and he unwrapped it and, much to everypony’s shock, levitated a small cluster of noodles and plopped it into the drink. Shock gave way to awe as the noodles dissolved into the fluid, leaving it the same color with no particles left. He returned the glass to Rainbow Dash, who looked at the cup with growing suspicion.
“If it can just melt food like that, what’s it going to do to my stomach? It’s not going to melt that too, is it?”
“Hmmm, haven’t seen it yet. Here, we’ll do a few more tests if you like. You do have two other ponies to think about, after all. Pinkie, you’ve brought... half a candy shop, great. Uh... what would you like to put in?” he asked, sliding over the glass and waiting. Silver, not having known Pinkie as long as the rest, couldn’t have anticipated her putting in not one item, not two, but everything she brought into the cup. A whole cake, half a tray of brownies, enough cupcakes to knock Dawn out and even a sack full of assorted hard candies: everything went in. And still, at the end, the drink looked exactly the same. Rainbow Dash was about as comforted as she might be waking up in the arms of an Ursa Major robbed of her cub, and she quickly shoved the glass away and watched in horror as Pinkie chugged half of her own glass.
It was rare, but Pinkie could be struck speechless at times, usually only by unbridled joy. The drink, having absorbed all the sweetness of every treat she had put into it, was, without a doubt, the most delicious thing she had ever tasted. Her wide, unblinking eyes were testament to this fact.
“Ok, Silver, your drink just broke Pinkie. I’m not just worried, I’m really bucking freaked out!”
“Cousin, what does that drink actually do?” Berry asked, waiting for Pinkie’s brain to reboot any second.
“It simply absorbs the taste of anything put in. Twilight, better do yours next, or that ice cream is going to be a drink in and of itself.” The concept was crazy, the drink scary, and the magic behind it all too exhilarating for her to pass up, and she eagerly shoveled two large scoops into her glass, watching as they dissipated with giddy excitement. She gave it a swig, followed up with a gasp, and finished by chugging the rest.
“Silver, you have got to show me more alchemy. This is too amazing!” One by one, they all started trying the various foods they brought, and Silver’s plan was deemed a rousing success. He still had one last trick for the night, but as with most pranks, they are better revealed suddenly and without warning. Pouring a glass of the vodka, he levitated a crumpet out of Rarity’s basket and dropped it in, along with a vial of a new additive derived from the poison joke. It was a little disappointing, really, but with Rarity it may be good for some laughs.
“Sugarcube, ah hope you know what you’re doin’,” Applejack warned, her seriousness tainted by the evil grin dominating her muzzle.
“Don’t worry, sweetheart. I’ll still be at the top of her list, I think.”
“You can always blame it on me. That’s what Rainbow Dash does,” Cerulean chuckled, glancing over at the guilty mare who held an air of indignation for just a moment before devolving into a fit of snickers. After a few gentle prods, the mare stirred back into wakefulness, blinking for a few moments before she remembered why she had lost consciousness in the first place.
“My mane, is it? It is! Silver, you are truly a marvel! I’m so happy, I could just...”
“Easy there, Rarity, he’s already spoken for.”
“Yes, well, it is most unfortunate, I suppose. Oh, now what is this then? It’s rather plain looking,” she remarked staring at the clear fluid.
“Don’t fret about the color, sweetheart. Just look, Pinkie’s enjoying it.” While speech had yet to return to the mare, she had managed to lift the corners of her mouth into a gargantuan smile that had Twilight slightly boggled as to how it were physically possible. The answer was that it wasn’t, but it was Pinkie, so she dismissed it and watched eagerly as Rarity tilted the glass back and had about the same reaction Twilight had. The similarities ended as Rarity got a free, albeit unasked for, cosmetic adjustment.
“Whatever are you all staring at me for? I know my mane is simply fabu... What is the meaning of this?!?” she howled, glancing down at herself in disbelief.
“C’mon, Rar, everypony knows Zecora talks in rhyme!” Dash chimed in, staring at the mare who now had black stripes to match her white coat.
“Stripes? What... but... I never wear stripes! Not even my mane could detract from... from...”
“Zebra Surprise, sweetheart. I’m sure there are other animals in there too, but as I’m sure Twilight can attest, working with Poison Joke is...”
“Absolutely horrible! I cannot believe you would do this to me, Silver! And here I was, thinking that you were different... All you stallions are the same!”
“Eeyup.”
“Big Mac, you’re not even on the list yet, but I assure you if I add your name now you will be below even Cerulean should you continue to speak!”
“Darlin’, how do ah rank on yer list?” he asked, ignoring the fuming mare and nuzzling Crimson. It was, unfortunately, a tender display of affection, and one that Rarity couldn’t possibly use as justification or fuel for her rant. In truth, she wasn’t all that upset about it, not having any plans to go out and certainly nopony around to impress. Besides, if it gave everypony a laugh, she could bare it. After all, despite what she claimed, she knew that everpony’s worries were on her shoulders, intentional or not. So, she continued to act the spaz, smiling inwardly as everypony had a good laugh at her antics which, this time, were being used for good.
Disturbed by the inexcusable noise, Bangles descended the stairs and watched the proceedings. Cerulean noticed and beckoned her over, mentally kicking himself for not having thought to invite her in the first place. She shrugged off his apology and sat down at the far end, furthest away from everypony and content simply to watch. Silver caught the look from Cerulean, and making his selection, poured her a glass of Breezy Blush and slid it over.
“I’m already staying in your tavern for free. You give me food and a place to sleep, I really can’t accept anything more from you.”
“Sweetheart, I have certain pregnant mare that would be right sore with me if I didn’t offer, so do me a favor and accept before I get in trouble, would you please?” She yielded without a word, raising the glass with her magic and taking a sip. The flavor was outstanding, and though she didn’t normally indulge, as she was surrounded by cheerful goodwill, she made an exception and downed the cup, though she still drank slower than most of the ponies around the table.
“Bangles, if you want to see something really funny, you should go find Freefall,” Snowdrift suggested, imagining the look on his friend’s face upon seeing the change in her mane.
“Why would I want to make him any more nervous around me than he already is? As it is, he hasn’t spoken to me since the first time...”
“You know, I can’t believe I’m actually going to say this, as Freefall has always been the one doing the chasing, but maybe you should go to him. Nervous or not, I bet he’d... no, I know he’d like to see you.” She pondered the suggestion, oblivious to the magic working through her hair, and decided that she really had nothing to lose. It was still hard for her to look most of Cerulean’s friends in the face, so the excuse to get away for a bit was readily accepted. After thanking Silver for the drink, she strode out the door and made for Sweet Apple Acres.
Perhaps it was her imagination, but she was being stared at a good deal more than normal, one of the main reasons she stayed in doors. It was almost enough to make her bolt back to the tavern, but something urged her on. Breaking her usual canter, she galloped towards the orchards, unsure of how to go about finding Freefall should he actually be outdoors somewhere. Such worries were unnecessary, as a startled yelp followed by a painful sounding impact bid her turn towards the barn, where Freefall had tumbled from the roof. His embarrassment only grew worse, along with his blush, as the mare trotted over and stood just a few hooflengths away.
“Are you all right?”
“Y... uh...” I don’t know what kind of freaky magic she’s using right now, but that mane... There’s no way I can talk to her like this.
“You know... I wouldn’t normally say this, but articulation can be an aphrodisiac.” I don’t know why I even said that. What the hay am I trying to imply?
“Is it... really?”
Was that... coherency? “Well, I would like whatever stallion that takes an interest to at least be able to speak with me.
Well, that all but knocks me out of the race. Can I just scream, does that count?
He’s hesitating again. What was it that... She looked up at him, faintly amused. “Really...”
Really? What’s that supposed to mean? Oh buck, she’s moving closer!
“Talk dirty to me.”
“Whoa, hold on, I’m not like that! I’m serious, I just want to go out with you, ok? I mean, sure, later on, yeah, that’d be awesome, but...” What the hay... did I just spout off. She took a step closer.
“If you’re interested in a little fun, all you have to do is ask, Freefall.”
“Ok, here’s a question; will you bucking go out with me?”
“Yes... sorry.” I can’t believe... I just said all that. I hate acting like... like I used to, but... it worked.
I can’t believe I just asked that. Wait, she said yes? “Buckin’ scoooooooooooore!”
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Baseless theory time: Bangles' drink had a bit of Silver's truth serum in it.
“Hey, the outside of my head looks like the inside of my head! That means I’m twice as smart now! C’mon, Twilight, hit me with your best shot!”
“Ok, Pinkie, divide something by zero.”
“Duh, I don’t even have to think about that, I do that all the time! It’s forty-two, silly. Ask me another!”
SO AWESOME
best chapter yet!
...
oh, and first!
Wait...
...let me get this straight. So Freefall is a Brazillian soccer commentator. 
649673
Nope
Oh, and you forgot the pizza mare dream.
649668
I will shoot this down right now. There was no Elixer of Truth in it. We may have some plans for it later though...
...i want that booze. I MUST HAVE THAT BOOZE!
649693
And that's why baseless theory time is not really a good time.
At least you get to mess with our expectations a bit more.
649704
The Breezy Blush or the Vodka? Cause both are awesome.
649718 you're kidding right? all of them! and what I wouldn't do for a little of that poison joke additive....
649725
At the same time.
Might as well go out in style.
nice, also zebra rarity made my day :)
649813 i was thinking more "put this stuff in my principal's coffee"
649818
Oh, that.
And now I wonder how I've managed to survive this long.
649823 and why is that?
649832
Because I just suggested mixing drinks that change your hair into magic shows, absorb the taste of anything, give you zebra stripes, and other assorted effects, and drinking the mix all in one go might have been a good idea.
Not the best of hangovers, let me tell you that.
649847 oh no, i do crap like that all th' time. one time i almost went into cardiac arrest from mixing all of th' samples at th' Coke plant.
649857
Silver would be yelling at us both right now.
649894 hellz yeah. wouldn't care though.
wonder what Bangles hair looks like
649683
pizza pony dream? i though that was a separate fic, not a chapter?
649946I'm curios about that too. Hey Cerulean1313, we gonna ever figure out what Bangle's hair looks like with the Breezy Blush?
650032 Completely seperate fic. I amused myself with making it cross over as a dream Pinkie had here, and thought that maybe fans of both would appreciate it. It is, admittedly, quite... bizarre, not the type of thing one would expect from somepony who writes serious stories.
650079 649946 As of this point... haven't written it in yet, but since you asked, I will make sure that is displayed eventually, though it won't be for a few more chapters at least.
653094I can live with that.
653094 it was strange, and i was "wut" for 3 hours afterwards.
653094 Thank you.
649718 All the boozes that Silver Moonshine has concocted. ALL OF THEM! My fellow bronies and I must drink them at all of our meetups.
Well, all of them except for the Dragon one and the Poison Joke varieties of drinks...
May the Grace of the Valar Protect You
Shire Folk
1329333 i want all of silver's creations, each put in an enchanted vial so that they never run out.
I don't know if the banana thing has to do with that YouTube video because that's what I thought it was and I laughed a bit too hard at that
TO THE MOON!!!
*chck**chck*
(Extra Quotation)
*boom*
Hey Beavis that pony just scored. What?! I wanna score! Nnaaaahgga! *slap*. Calm down fartnocker.
Oh God, the memories...
I have no... I ha... I... I... I... I... I...
God dammit you broke him again.
I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I... I...
Same as last time?
I... No... Have... I... I... Have... I... No... No... I...
I would think so Polaris.
Have... Have... Have... No... I... I... I... No... I...
Okay, Perceiver, this might feel a bit odd.
A bit? That was far more than a bit!
At least it felt kind of good.
It did? Well, at least you liked the resolution.
Yes, that I did. I imagine it felt similar to how. feeding does for Polaris.