(Warning: Displaced Story) Allen was just a normal guy before he went to a convention cos-playing as Gaige from borderlands. Nothing wrong there right? Everything was fine until he made the mistake of buying from a shady merchant. Nice going Allen.
5952861 Well, Max is going to need a distraction from running her Equestria, trying to catch the pegasus that killed Celestia and Luna -- one of which was her lover --, and she needs to let off some... steam as well.
Basically she's gonna tag along with Allen/Len for two or three chapters, all of which will be in your fic.
5952960 let me get a few chapters in, I plan on having her stoned by chapter 6 or maybe four, depends on how I decide to go, and then reawakened after either discord's return or Nightmare Moon's return. Haven't fully decided yet, or four chapter 3 that would be a nice place to start, all things considered. ya that'll work, give me till I finish and upload the second chapter and We can get that started. Unless you'd rather wait until after she get's petrified? My plans are always changing by the way.
5953048 Well I have a Golden Freddy Displaced and then a Displaced pair of Cthulhu (from Cthulhu Saves The World) and XJ9 Jenny Wakeman. Either of those sound good?
5953130 Len just recently got transformed into a girl and you want to have her body explored? Sure, why not. Had to happen eventually. Len should enjoy herself, even if she'll feel wrong and sick for enjoying it so much.
5953165 Less like a contest and more like a community for HIE characters, a relateable event that happened to each of them. In other words, a templet for a background that you can use, or at least thats my take on it, but to each his own.
5953132 wait, that's your story about the xj9 and cthulu? I was planning on reading that this weekend anyway, sure, be kinda cool to do so. Ill just read up on them a bit to sort of get the gist of their personalities and how they interact with other displaced and get back to you.
Well, when trying to add this story to the TF/TG group, I accidentally, briefly added it to a Conversion Bureau group. The moral of the story is to not use the group add feature on an iphone, because trying to scroll things on a touch-screen handles like ass.
Anyway, all in all this story is pretty alright. The grammar and spelling could use a touch-up, possibly an editor, and the pacing is a little wonky, but the fight scene played out pretty well, so I think this has a fair amount of promise.
I hope you know what you've gotten yourself into. All of us Displaced basically, but especially the other Borderlands Displaced. Especially, especially Handsome Jack.
Nobody who interacts with his world in some way gets off clean, even if Jack himself is a (somewhat) okay guy, the forces he's arrayed against are far from willing to ignore other potential victims.
5954169 Len: You can tell Jack to bring his worst, I'll blow his ass out of the sky... y'know, if he shows up like 1,000 or so years from now.... and I've actually became somewhat good... I might be a little screwd.
5954152 Well that's a relief, someone for Len to relate to.
I'd like to request a re-edit to this story, pacing is too quick, the flow is off and the character interactions are out of place.
Ending up in a forest, okay Got over the fact he's a lady now, huh... Suddenly Star Swirl appears, still okay Follows him for no reason other than trusting him saying so, okay... Griffins attacking, good, entering into a conflict blithely ignorant and unaware of the world events around you, classic story plot A griffin, ready to kill the MC with a flaming sword but stops to ask "Why?"
Why does she even need to know, she's a griffin, a natural predator, a battle hardened soldier but some random creature kills her comrades and suddenly she loses all precedence of offing the MC? I think the logical sense, even in an illogical world, would've been to try and violently murder a mysterious hostile creature. And for the MC to not know where 'she' is but suddenly mention the EverFree and start spouting what would've been nonsense is taken with a grain of salt, even then, talking about exposition and a 'sorry' somehow curbs the story into a formal duel.
I like the displaced genre, I'm even happy someone made one as Gaige but if the opener is too quick, too off balance, it makes me cringe on how the MC is going to interact with others further into the story.
I will still like this, there is room for improvement, like this-
‘Alright, two down, probably like 10 more to-Oh fuck!’
strong enough to send the gryphon flying a good 6 feet.
Ten and six, numbers below ten are written as the word not numeral but to show professionalism or to look clean, most still keep to the word of numbers unless giving dates or very large and exaggerated numbers (ex: the total is 10,000 bits or ten thousand bits)
You know, if you'd like to change the rating to Mature, Max would be happy to... show Allen/Len the ropes....
5952813 I think we'll keep that in mind for the future. Though my mind is generally always in the gutter, so, what did you have in mind exactly?
Why is every HiE story about a damn merchant and cosplay? am I missing something?
Ok... Allen=Gage, Len=????
HELP!!!!!!
Like and Fav! Borderlands 2 rocks! You open to crossover yet?
5952861 Well, Max is going to need a distraction from running her Equestria, trying to catch the pegasus that killed Celestia and Luna -- one of which was her lover --, and she needs to let off some... steam as well.
Basically she's gonna tag along with Allen/Len for two or three chapters, all of which will be in your fic.
5952960 let me get a few chapters in, I plan on having her stoned by chapter 6 or maybe four, depends on how I decide to go, and then reawakened after either discord's return or Nightmare Moon's return. Haven't fully decided yet, or four chapter 3 that would be a nice place to start, all things considered. ya that'll work, give me till I finish and upload the second chapter and We can get that started. Unless you'd rather wait until after she get's petrified? My plans are always changing by the way.
5952957 Just about, I'll let you know when i'm ready to accept crossovers, but first, what did you have in mind?
5953045 Okay, just remember: Max'll teach Len about the Displaced and Len's own body. s.mlpforums.com/uploads/post_images/img-487603-12-my-little-pony-friendship-is-magic-brony-shining-armor-certainly-does.jpg
5953048 Well I have a Golden Freddy Displaced and then a Displaced pair of Cthulhu (from Cthulhu Saves The World) and XJ9 Jenny Wakeman. Either of those sound good?
5952950 This is that cosplayer human in equestria thing, not all HiE stories are like this
5953156 oh so its like a little contest ok
5953130 Len just recently got transformed into a girl and you want to have her body explored? Sure, why not. Had to happen eventually. Len should enjoy herself, even if she'll feel wrong and sick for enjoying it so much.
5953165 Less like a contest and more like a community for HIE characters, a relateable event that happened to each of them. In other words, a templet for a background that you can use, or at least thats my take on it, but to each his own.
5953132 wait, that's your story about the xj9 and cthulu? I was planning on reading that this weekend anyway, sure, be kinda cool to do so. Ill just read up on them a bit to sort of get the gist of their personalities and how they interact with other displaced and get back to you.
Well, when trying to add this story to the TF/TG group, I accidentally, briefly added it to a Conversion Bureau group. The moral of the story is to not use the group add feature on an iphone, because trying to scroll things on a touch-screen handles like ass.
Anyway, all in all this story is pretty alright. The grammar and spelling could use a touch-up, possibly an editor, and the pacing is a little wonky, but the fight scene played out pretty well, so I think this has a fair amount of promise.
I can see a funny crossover coming on.
5953800 Was about to post a wordy, slightly frustrated response about this story not being TCB until I saw your post. Kudos for owning up, friend
5953672 Well I haven't gotten super far along yet, but the story is called 'My Life As A Teenage Elder God'
I hope you know what you've gotten yourself into. All of us Displaced basically, but especially the other Borderlands Displaced. Especially, especially Handsome Jack.
Nobody who interacts with his world in some way gets off clean, even if Jack himself is a (somewhat) okay guy, the forces he's arrayed against are far from willing to ignore other potential victims.
So fun.
5954169 Len: You can tell Jack to bring his worst, I'll blow his ass out of the sky... y'know, if he shows up like 1,000 or so years from now.... and I've actually became somewhat good... I might be a little screwd.
5954152
Well that's a relief, someone for Len to relate to.
I'd like to request a re-edit to this story, pacing is too quick, the flow is off and the character interactions are out of place.
Ending up in a forest, okay
Got over the fact he's a lady now, huh...
Suddenly Star Swirl appears, still okay
Follows him for no reason other than trusting him saying so, okay...
Griffins attacking, good, entering into a conflict blithely ignorant and unaware of the world events around you, classic story plot
A griffin, ready to kill the MC with a flaming sword but stops to ask "Why?"
Why does she even need to know, she's a griffin, a natural predator, a battle hardened soldier but some random creature kills her comrades and suddenly she loses all precedence of offing the MC? I think the logical sense, even in an illogical world, would've been to try and violently murder a mysterious hostile creature. And for the MC to not know where 'she' is but suddenly mention the EverFree and start spouting what would've been nonsense is taken with a grain of salt, even then, talking about exposition and a 'sorry' somehow curbs the story into a formal duel.
I like the displaced genre, I'm even happy someone made one as Gaige but if the opener is too quick, too off balance, it makes me cringe on how the MC is going to interact with others further into the story.
I will still like this, there is room for improvement, like this-
Ten and six, numbers below ten are written as the word not numeral but to show professionalism or to look clean, most still keep to the word of numbers unless giving dates or very large and exaggerated numbers (ex: the total is 10,000 bits or ten thousand bits)
Just when I thought it couldn't get any better with these displaced stories. This one comes along. Love it!
5954574 thank you, second chapter not all that right now, but i hope that you'll like it still.
You know this is probably the best written displaced story I've read in a while (a while being since these stories started popping up)
img.pandawhale.com/97663-Thumbs-Up-Horse-Head-gif-Imgur-CvMD.gif
OMFG!!! Borderlands 2 crossover with my favourite character!!!
Wonder if 'she' is gonna get the IQ boost like the other did?
7002369
Go fuck your self