Revitalization: The Tale of Pumpkin Cake?

by RealityWarper

Crimson Eyes

Verisimilitude, a fickle definition. I know it as a very funny concept.

At times it's known as a reality, projected as a simple illusion yet fooling the mind and confusing those who attempt to grasp it. However, I won't bother with circumlocution. It's a pointless round about I don't very much care for. I am by no means a sesquipedalian, and prefer words smaller where I don't have to actually process and look for a definition for the word.

No, in short verisimilitude is what I was facing at this moment. My eye lids were tickled as I felt the light beyond them. It was so devastatingly bright I was forced to actually check and see what this bright glowing death was. As I wrenched open my eyes and gazed at the world anew, I flinched back, my pupils doubtlessly shrunk even if I couldn't see it happening. I forced my eyes shut once more, before blinking several times to adjust myself to the bright room. Once my vision was no longer spotted from the assault on my vision I stared, awestruck to find before me stood two giant over-sized horses sporting a multitude of technicolor I'd never seen so accurately in my life. Of course this whole area was ridiculously which would bring me to a theory that verisimilitude was indeed the answer, and I had been shrunken.

But that's just a theory.

A game theory.

Ahem.

The point I'm getting at is that I was having a hallucination that I wasn't quite sure was just a false vision. Hallucinations aren't accurate, at least not often. They don't usually match up, for one. However, I could see everything vividly as I did in my every day life. This was highly upsetting, startling, and sub-optimal.

The two horse in question bared grossly incandescent smiles of both pride and surprisingly -

Love.

This made my internal organs metaphorically churn at the very thought that someone was looking at me with the same eyes that I desired not so long ago. Something I could never quite...reach. Be it because of me pushing my chances with friends and love away to work or chase fame, or simply because I had never been loved. Not even my own parents were fond of me like to two strangers of a different species entirely with large tear filled eyes with looks of something akin to approval in them. I was half afraid I'd need to turn around to check as see if they were watching their child and I happen to be in the way. Which I would have done had I not apparently been tied up with some sort of cloth.

After about a few seconds of staring on their part and mines; their eyes lit up with horror and shock. The mare actually took a step back before she actually spoke.

"W-What's wrong with my baby?"

It crashed upon me like an anvil, apparently I was now a baby and there was something 'wrong' with me. Implying that being a infant wasn't already wrong. It also occurred to me that they were speaking my language. Or maybe I was speaking theirs. Maybe by chance were they creatures that could see souls? If so, I was done for. This wasn't my body clearly, and this is something out of a fantasy or sci-fy book. These were possible as anything else I suppose.

"There's nothing wrong with her, she's just a little different..." Though these words were said, they clearly were grounded out in fear and lowly whispered. The male horse's, stallion as they call it; Legs were shivering with something I could misinterpret as terror. He was looking like a dear before the headlights, his eyes wide with obvious hysteria. I did however, notice the slip of 'she' in there. This meant my gender had been transformed as well as my form.

Great.

The day had just begun, and it's outcome was already looking bleak. I simply stared at that, awaiting anything to happen to break this awkward situation. I prayed to whatever gods existed. Of course, they did not heed my call being the nonexistent beings that they are.

Go figure.

The mare and the stallion both couldn't seem to wrench their eyes from my own. I had captured them in some eye trance that was making them shiver in terror the way one would before a knife being held above their head and they knew their time was up. Or perhaps like their soul was about to be devoured. Yes, an accurate description. Their coat had become several shades lighter than they were before, their pupils shrunken into pinpricks, legs quivering- shaking like a leaf as they gazed at me, tensed up like a statue aside from the shaking. If I didn't know better they'd look like they had seen the devil himself. Strangely, the room looked much darker than it did before. The light bulb began flickering, the room began trembling and the other contents of the room began moving on their own- rocking back on forth and began etching writing onto the walls of the room.

Wait what?

Snapping out of my self induced stupor, the room suddenly turned back to the same way it had been before my hallucinations. Implying this wasn't one.

"Whoa, dude that was freaky." I blurted out to no one inparticular. This grasped the attention of my parents immediately.

Instantly they went from their quivering states to cooing once, they were picking me up and nuzzling me on either side with words of praise.

"Aww, isn't she just adorable?"

"Indeed she is my dear!"

That's not what you two were saying a second ago.

"I wonder what she was saying...How are you enjoying seeing for the first time Pumpkin Cake?" The blue coated, pink maned, aptly designed matching eye color, and decidedly round mare beamed at me- eyes filled with joy.

"Now Cupcake," Begun the chastising of the orange maned, dark yellow coated stallion with green eyes who also decidedly needed some meat to add to his bones. "It's not like she can understand us!...But what curious...crimson...spooky...deathly-" He was 'elbowed' by who I assume to be his wife, who was now to be addressed as 'Cupcake'. This would be a pet name of course, but it was all I had to go on. Crimson red spooky eyes? "-Sorry Cup'. It's just that...it's much worse than being on the receiving end of Fluttershy's stare. With her it's...disapproval. It makes you feel like the worst pony and you want to be forgiven. But with Pumpkin Cake...It felt. I don't know, evil... supernatural. It felt like my soul was being ripped out the longer I watched. I felt like I was dying...I felt like my sanity was tearing itself to shreds...I saw...madness. I was madness..." His shivering picked up once again, but it looked suppressed. Cupcake looked equally as worried but laid a hoof upon the stallion who looked closed to blubbering like a baby. "B-But I guess her eyes are just...a gift maybe. It'll keep away bad ponies right?" He laughed nervously.

"Hun'..."

"We'll be fine," He sighed, and muttered. "I hope...I need something else to think about."

"Well, Pound Cake will be happy to see his new sister when he comes home!"

"Oh, where is Pound Cake anyway?"

"He's with his friends, The Cutie Mark Crusaders and some kids from his class."

"Why do we let him play with those Crusaders again?"

"Well..." Began Cupcake, but I tuned it out. I'd figure more out later, I was uncharacteristically tired at the moment. Oh so very. I closed my eyes, and saw only darkness.

I was still alive.

Time to make the most of it.

Comments

[Wand3r3r3]

I saw that you posted this in the 'I just want a comment' group ^-^

I really like the concept you're bringing here, and I love how you go into deep detail inside the minds of all the characters, how you describe the theory of being reborn into a strange new world, and the way you went ahead and told us how the main character died, but in the way you sort of indirectly told us, within your lore.
But there are also times when you need to be careful with the prose you're choosing to write this story with.

The actual events that were told in this chapter seem a bit too...dismantled and vague, if this makes sense. You tell of the events, but you do so with a very cloudy glimpse (that I also got)each time you bring up a new detail about them. I mean, don't get me wrong, please. I personally admire this sort of prose, but...not everyone is willing to dissect everything you give us. Either they don't really know how, or just don't have the time for it, but, again, I personally love it.
With future chapters, I'd recommend telling the direct events of the story a little more easy to grasp and follow.

Best of luck to you! And if you ever need any help, I'm here~

[RealityWarper]

5923367 Thank you so much for your apt description for my story and a my first comment!

Yes, I'm glad you picked up on that specific detail, I have a bad habit of actually giving discreet and subtle hints whilst not giving out all the required information! This is a habit picked up from Five Nights at Freddy's lore! The clues are in the story as it progresses leaving only theories usually! You can piece together what happened after a certain time period. I'll try to go easy on it, for those who don't want to dissect it for such!

Thank you for your offer on help! I hope to see you around!

~Timantha

[dargondarkfire]

hmm... why did this pop up in my feed... i don't remember following a timantha.... wait.. did you change you name from something else?

edit: oh, you wrote the foald story! ... i don't remember you name being timantha? you haven't blogged in months so i though you had left fim fic.

[MidnightBlaze16]

*reading descrption*
'Give gifts. Give life*
THATS IT IM READING THIS RIGHT NOW!!

[ThatOneGuyWhoIs]

I found myself enjoying the format in which you told the story, it's a great deal of fun to put information together until I have the full picture.

[RealityWarper]

5923584 I've been really busy and haven't felt the want to force an update! So, I haven't! But now that I've got a little time I may or may not update it. This is the center of my attention at the moment!

5923783 I would do the same for any story that said that.

5923788 It's great to see that you enjoy it! I wasn't sure a lot of people would! I love mysteries and making theories so this is my way of telling stories now!

Thank you all for your feedback!

[ferret]

derpicdn.net/img/2014/8/8/694729/tall.png

[PartyponyXD]

Love that game theory reference.

[DF]

Well, you've caught my interest with the whole Room-o-Madness you've got going there. Mostly decent (with some glaring exceptions) grammar is a definite plus as well.

[Texus]

Terror child? It would be interessting if she would have dark powers, but well would use them for more or less good stuff.
I mean it more or less like he wouldn´t think much about that kind of power, and the Ponys probably only know (black and white), while he is more like grey.
I tried to explain, but it seems I'm not exactly able to do it perfect tonight.