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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Excuse me, before I read this, can you tell me what the fuck is wrong with you?
NO offense, but what made you want to write this? Its...really fucking strong.
Now I shall read
EDIT: Ok, I read it...What. The. Fuck.
i1058.photobucket.com/albums/t414/Brony4ever/Pinkiecrazy1.jpg
Thats my face after reading this, yup, I'm sexually turned on now.
Dude NO!!!!!!! Pinkie should not go there with Derpy . while I admit Soarin got what he deserved, being brutally murdered and torn to pieces by Pinkamena. He deserved no less after he raped Rainbow Dash but don't ruin Pinkie and Derpy love they have. I really hope Pinkie gets some psychological help from Ms.Winter Breeze before she reaches that point. But yeah i Totally saw AJ going nuts after seeing what zecora and applebloom did thank celestia Twilight was there to straighten the situation out. But yeah love your stories but only cupcake those ponies who deserve it, Derpy is an innocent soul. and yeah it was a bit hard to clop with all the heavy stuff going on in this chapter but that's not a bad thing. Keep up the good work Soul. Nightshade Darkmane Signing out.
341723 Well, I just like seeing into the reality of things. You know.... go beyond the border of those illusions we create and call "love" and "lust". Uniting them into a new definition of what the twisted mind of someone being infatuated over another person can do just for the sake of his or her own unstable affection. How violent we get, how unforgiving we act, what wrong decisions we make only because the inner voice says it's right. Can't we go beyond it? Can't we see behind the fragile flesh and touch the very marrow of our souls to see what we really are? Is that fair? Is it? No.... it isn't...
That's why I'm here.... to show a guiding light in the true world of darkness we try to escape. It's there.... and it will always be there *twitching grin*
I agree with 342131, Pinkie should NOT kill Derpy. Please?
That sweet, gray mare is way too lovable too kill. She would probably Pinkie-swear to keep the secret for Pinkie.
Also, Is Spike going to get laid here or not? I would really like to see what you have for him.
Ps: 342549 . Nice Speech there
342549
...
That was beautifiul.
i1058.photobucket.com/albums/t414/Brony4ever/Pinkiesorrow.jpg
weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/dis-gon-b-gud.gif
myfacewhen.net/uploads/1821-bro-hoof.png
First word of the story.... Murdered.... Pfft!
I thought you did a time-skip and Zecora had been murdered.
However, I have to ask, where is Big Mac, and what does he think of FlutterBerry?
And Luna. It seems she'd preside over all the elite and sneaky soldiers, or at least have some interesting turn-ons.
I will just believe that you meant Cranky Doodle with Pinkie's story... *whistles with an unaware expression*
The thought of having Pinkie as a lover is terrifying, but at the same time exciting.
Pinkie scares me, a lot.
That's just messed up.
Yet amazingly entertaining.
I mean, this almost disturbed me as much as this picture, nein it disturbed me much more (in a good way).
3.bp.blogspot.com/_irRD0qEb4jw/S54bvPeKyiI/AAAAAAAAHLQ/T-WvkaiG8Mg/s400/Freaky+Foto+Manipulation+(7).jpg
344210 Ponyville's Lusts will go on for quite a while, so there are still a whole bunch of characters that still needs introduction. Big Mac is one of them, I promise
344522 it sur is exciting, ain't it?
343600 thx, and right back at ya
343080 people say I have a talent for it, yes
345011 Good! I'm glad you aren't trying to wrap it up as soon as you can. There are a lot of different arcs you can run, and even go back to old ones.
Theoretically, you can keep fresh content in for another five hundred thousand words.
Two things though: I keep imagining Soul Hook to be in a fitted suit, and thus keep thinking therapists use Slenderman / Slendermane as a way of reaching peoples' / ponies' souls. An effective method, but......
Anyways, why is that? Does he wear a suit, or am I thinking of something else?
Also, if I didn't need money so badly, I would bet that if you removed all the vernacular titles (Striped exotic mare, etc) and replaced it with their name (Zecora), you could shave off over one thousand words.
It's good to see variety, but when you spend half the story reading a new title, it can get a little confusing and even tedious (Though still amusing when you think about how much effort it must've taken to write) to read.
Perhaps try doing it every other address on the next chapter?
I get that every author has their own calling card / signature writing style, so try it and see if it's still Soul Hook. If not, carry on as you were and I'll just be quiet.
344791 I have seen much worse.
345624 As have I, just thought that was a funny picture.
345624 My profile pic shows exactly how Soul Hook looks like. He wears nothing but his casual cigarette in the mouth now and then
And yes, I know what you mean about prolonged descriptions, but it feels really weird using the name of that character or "she" too many times. It feels like I'm repeating things way too often that way. I try to vary the words as often as I can without effing it up too much. I'll see what happens as I improve
352693 Then I must just be watching too many Marble Hornets...
At any rate, a fitted suit would make him very intimidating.
Like.... Walk-into-Canterlot-and-threaten-the-Princess-and-walk-out-without-the-guards-willing-to-do-anything-to-stop-him intimidating.
But then you go from not giving any fucks to being a gangster (The REAL kind. Not the idiots who don't know what a belt is or how to use a gun).
I don't really remember the last time I saw "she" or "<name>", so clearly you aren't doing it too often.
But you absolutely can not do that during plot-important dialogue. It makes it too easy for a less articulate reader to skim it, and end up confused later.
Hell, it wears on me, and last time I did the test at school, I had a lexile of 1607 on a scale of 1700.
Like I said, try a chapter that will alternate between lengthy description, she, and name. Unless interrupted by dialogue or the introduction of a new character, in which case a lengthy description would fit perfectly.
If it doesn't feel like SoulHook, don't write it that way any more and go back to what you were doing.
Damn Soulhook you just got cock blocked by Rainbow Dash, in your own story. LOLWUT? Can't Wait to see where you take this story next I'd love to see the doctor in this. after reading beating the heat he's one of my fav background characters now.