• Published 16th Feb 2015
  • 3,277 Views, 91 Comments

I Don't Think I'm Supposed to be Here - Architect Ironturtle

What happens when the Merchant screws up a displacement?

  • ...

Mental Misconceptions

I needed answers, and lots of them. Where did the Radiant crystal come from, how long has it been here, what happened during my memory gap, and why did those ponies attack me on sight? I couldn't exactly get those stumbling around in the Everfree, so I dodged around the Elements of Harmony and hightailed it down the path. It would probably lead to a city of some sort, and from there I could get my bearings and find out what I needed to know. I recast Skeleton Walk as needed, and let my mind blank out to process all this so I wouldn't snap and do something stupid, fingering the crown in one hand and the Direstone (to counteract the Radiant's corrupting presence) in the other. I also allocated that last skill point so it would stop bugging me.


Twilight groaned and sat up. Her horn had gone from blinding pain to a dull throbbing, and she could focus on her surroundings again.

"What. The. Hay. Was THAT!?" Rainbow shouted.

"I don't know," Twilight responded, "I've never seen anything like it."

Twilight didn't understand: they'd found the creature, and it was just like Celestia had described it, right down to the missing hair. They'd started charging the elements, and then-then the creature had slammed one of its paws into the ground and shouted, "Global Silence!" and, and-

What's with all the and, and, stuff? asked her internal critic, You know exactly what happened. It completely blocked our ability to use magic, that's what it did. After that her horn had started drilling into her skull and she hadn't been able to focus on anything but the pain. Judging by the moans surrounding her, she wasn't the only one affected like this.

Just the idea that anypony could turn Twilight's magic off like that was enough to make her want to curl up in bed and never come out again. Magic was everything to her, and how it felt when it was missing... Twilight turned green and shoved the sensation from her mind. No, she would not think about it, no, no, no!

"I know, I know. He cast Global Silence on us!" Pinkie tried to say happily, but didn't quite reach her usual level of peppiness as she was still trying to stand up.

"He did what now?" asked Applejack, who was stuck in the same predicament.

"Global Silence? You know, where he stops all spell casting everywhere for 7 seconds?"

Everypony stared at Pinkie for a moment. She just grinned, and started eating a cupcake she pulled out of her mane. Then what she'd stated sank in.

"All spell casting? Oh, no, the Princess!" Twilight wheeled about and started sprinting towards Canterlot. "We have to make sure she's ok!"

If this creature was so powerful and destructive, then why hadn't he used this ability before, or killed them when he had the chance? Thought Twilight frantically. It makes no sense! Nothing was adding up, she couldn't figure out how to make it add up, and it was driving her crazy!

The others fell into step behind, trading wary glances with each other. Since none of them were feeling particularly suicidal Twilight remained uniformed that her crown was missing. It wasn't like she couldn't figure it out for herself, after all. Why court death by bringing it to her attention?


I am confused, therefore something I believe isn't true.

Getting into the city proved to be no challenge what-so-ever thanks to Riki's Permanent Invisibility, and I was busily perusing the royal library for newspapers and other useful books. I'd just sat down and cracked open a stack of this year's most prominent papers, in hopes of finding something about my exploits. The only problem was, there wasn't anything about me personally or any unexplained events that could be attributed to me. I couldn't find a single thing that could have possibly been my fault. Instead, the latest papers were filled with proclamations of Discord's second defeat. Well, at least now I knew when I was in addition to where, but that brought me back to my first question: where could I read up on my past actions?

What do I believe?

1. I believe that I killed a large number of creatures in order to get enough experience to hit level cap.

Probable, since if it hadn't been like that I would have had to allocate 25 skill points instead of just one. Also, I wouldn't have been standing on a dead Hydra when I came to. That was a pretty strong piece of evidence.

2.I believe that a killing spree of the size required to hit level cap will have drawn a lot of attention.

Also probable. Doubly so, thanks to the sensationalist tendencies of the media, and triply so given the trail of bodies I left behind.

3. I believe that I have been doing this continuously since I first arrived here. STOP.

That's it. I'm not in the news because whatever I did wasn't recent enough. I'm looking in the wrong place.


I'd finally found it in the ancient history section of the archives, between a record of Discord's insane lawyers and a tome on the fall of the Crystal Empire. Apparently, I was a creature known as Massacre, who appeared 1111 years ago and left a trail of slaughter in his wake before finally being nailed by the Elements of Harmony and sealed in stone. I'm just glad I didn't have to experience all that time. It probably would have driven me crazy. Well, crazier.This actually explained a lot of things, including why I had over 58 billion bits. It still didn't explain why Radiant crystals were on this planet in the first place, though. There also seemed to be a disturbing lack of Direstone, or wars with the Dire. Equestria was pure Radiant in the most thorough sense of the word, and you'd think that would draw the ire of any Dire followers.

Wait, it did. Discord, The Changlings, Sombra, Tirek, they must be the Dire users, and they have fought in the past. Equestria just won. In any case, what I had to do was clear. The ancients known as the Radiant and the Dire enslave anything and everything they come across, warping the mind and ensnaring the soul, and forcing their followers (slaves) to fight each other. If I stood by and let it happen I'd be an even worse monster than they already think I am. That means I have to expunge their influence from this planet, and prevent them from ever coming back. And to do that I'm going to have to track down every piece of Direstone, every shard of Radiant ore, and destroy them once and for all. Including the Elements of Harmony.

Of course, I had to follow up such a declaration with a heroic pose as I embarked upon my quest to save the world, so I did, snapping to attention and placing my left fist over my chest. "This I swear by the power vested in me by whoever-that-merchant-guy-was!"

"Ahh! Monster!" Oh, right, I'm a wanted criminal. I really should have known better than to expose myself.

Now, where to start. I don't have any clue where to look for these things. I'll need something capable of tracking an object or creature over vast distances, which I don't have, or some way to detect the Radiant and Dire when they're close by... Wait a second. I pulled out the two anomalous stones, used some magic immunity to shield my mind from their influence, then only had one out at a time and waited. A few minutes later I was heading deep into the tunnels under Canterlot for the first Radiant shard, the Direstone in hand and my mind holding off the corruption as best it could. I just hoped the shard didn't have any defenses, living or otherwise. I'd made enough of a mess already, so I didn't exactly want to add to it.

Author's Note:

8/15/2017 This one needed fewer edits than I thought it would, but I still got rid of a bunch of stuff that had been bugging me. On to chapter 3!

P.S. Go check out A Farmers Tools by Imperial Bedlam. It manages to stand out pretty well, which is impressive in the ever growing displaced continuity.