Hello darkness my old friend
CRACK!
It sucks to be with you again.
CRACK!
God I am thankful that I don't have a nose or otherwise it would be broken all to hell right now.
CRACK!
Is he done yet?
CRACK!
I will take that as a no...
Before I could ponder any further as to if Sombra has stopped using my face as a punching bag I received yet another of his famous black crystal clad hoof to the face, one again leaving a slight dent to my forehead but now cracking the small bridge on my nose that I do have (although I wouldn't call it a nose cause it is so damn small) and therefore breaking my nose.
One bloody mess later Sombra dropped my head and let me land back on the floor and just as I placed my hands on the floor to pull myself up and to show that bastard what I had thought of him over the millennia, he used the fragments to form around all four of my hands and locked me in place.
"Oh Skolas, Skolas, Skolas, did you honestly believe that it would be this easy?"
Looking up at him all I could really think and say was...
"In all honesty, yes. Yes I did think it would be this easy." And for saying such a thing I received yet another open hand...open hoof to the left cheek. I swear hooves are soft and fuzzy one moment and the next they are hard as a fucking rock the next.
Harrumphing at my answer I heard Sombra trot away from me before using the crystals to barricade and reinforce the bars keeping me here, the same cell that I was stuck in when I first arrived here.
"Do stay here and stay out of trouble. It would be such a shame if I were to suddenly...hurt somepony you care about." Sombra said in a taunting tone before leaving the dungeon, cackling loudly as he vanished, leaving me alone with my thoughts.
Man I am so going to murder the shit out of this fucker.
With nothing but my thoughts, an empty dungeon, and my hands, all I could think about was the many horrible, gory, painful and terrifying ways I could kill Sombra as they ranged from tossing him into a wood chipper, a pool full of hungry sharks, even shot-putting him into a volcano terminator style.
Once I was sure that he was gone and couldn't hear me completely, I drained the darkness that he infused the crystals with and watched as they crumbled into tiny cracked shards and with it my hands were free. Flicking the shards off and away from my person I stood up and inspected the bars holding me here and with a roll of the eyes I scoffed at the weak display holding me here.
Such diluted darkness...seems like Sombra isn't at full strength yet, now is my chance to make sure he doesn't reach it.
Phase-shifting through the bars I turned my head to both directions, making sure that there are no mind-controlled guards on patrol but when I heard nothing but my own heavy breathing I let out a small sigh of relief. I can't recall how Sombra managed to combine the darkness with magic runes but all I do know is that he secretly placed those runes on a vast majority of the guards and they didn't know what hit them until the rune was activated.
So many ponies died because of that action, but it was enough for him to almost win.
Not on my watch, never again.
Walking through the enlarged halls I cast my gaze at the surrounding area, noticing that everything now has a darker hue and that there are jagged black crystals lining the halls and ceiling. Seemed like Sombra took his time to greet me and decided to make this palace more homely for himself. I wonder how he will feel when I beat the shit out of him and use his body to break every single piece of corrupted crystal stacks? Probably not to happy, but he has a lot to pay for.
Stalking the halls of my new home I saw that things have barely changed since I've been staying here, usually I would just ignore everything and just do my job, but now that I have only one thing to do it surprisingly is giving me the time to truly enjoy what I have been bypassing for years.
The crystal spires and priceless artwork that decorate the place suits of ornament armor lean against the wall and lastly a stylized window of the two princesses moving in a circular motion with the sun and moon in their respective places.
I wonder why Sombra hasn't smashed this yet? IF those two couldn't stop someone that is younger and less experienced in combat magic than them, then they clearly aren't meant to rule anything. I mean seriously, I only told him how to harness the darkness and yet he managed to best two alicorns and a legion of guards. Although I admit it, I too was caught off guard and allowed this to happen, maybe I shouldn't have taught him how to harness his inner hatred and anger.
Picking up the pace a bit I started to scale the stairs to reach the second floor, recalling back the memories of my first time being here...
It has been an hour since I was released from my prison cell, Princess Celestia called it all a misunderstanding but I was busy grumbling and snarling to myself as we went up the stairs leading to the surface. I had to duck and mostly crawl up the stair as they were too small for me to properly walk through, further making it longer for us all to get up top and make this embarrassing situation go away. Well, make it go away for the princesses but for me, I am going to hold onto this for a later date and time to dangle over their heads.
To me this is downright embarrassing cause here I am, Skolas, The Wolf Kell, crawling up a flight of stairs on my hands and knees, with my face mere inches from a horse guard's tail and I must say, if I feel hot wind then I am going back to that prison cell for murdering a guard.
Lucky for me I felt nothing and once we left the prison what I saw was something you would find in a final fantasy game. Everything around me was grandiose and extravagant for a backwater planet, exquisite art, silk tapestries, priceless busts of horses of some importance, expertly crafted suits of armor on stands and flawless looking urns and jars. In all if one was to enter this place for the first time them they would be in awe with everything present, but for me it was more like a 'one-and-done' sort of thing for me, sure its a nice looking foyer and all but its nothing I haven't seen before, example, The Buckingham Palace.
When they showed me the grand foyer for the Crystal Palace I had to admit it was nice, but then they started to lead me up more flights of stairs, saying that this place took a decade to build and when it was finished these ponies said that it is truly a wonder that can eclipse anything that any other pony or non-pony can ever build. I simply ignored that comment because I thought back to Mount Rushmore, the Statue of Liberty, and to me those were amazing, a crystal palace is just showing off.
Once the first floor was done we moved up to the second floor which housed the servants and other castle workers alongside with the crystal guard as their barracks was right next to their own. I have to admit when I first met the crystal guards I thought that they were terrible and were underpowered, and for the most part they are with the exception of the princesses personal guards as they are wearing some pretty sweet gear. I saw that they are wearing crystalized armor and from what the Princess Luna has told me, it is enchanted by them so it is stronger and much more durable, made lighter and also it infuses with the pony wearing it some attributes that match their monarch.
The solar guards were made white, blond manes, and they seemed to have a low sun-like glow to them.
The lunar guards were made a dark grey, bat wings if they were a pegasi, their ears had fur tufts, small cute fangs, cat-eyes, and a habit of hiding in things to spy on people...ponies. How did I know they hide in things?
I found one in my bathroom bathtub.
My response was to turn on the bathtub and to toss the wet pony out the room before slamming said door shut.
Anyways, the regular guards wore substandard armor made of bronze and fabric, iron was considered a luxary because of how hard it was for them to forge it let alone successfully smelt it because their forges are garbage along with their knowledge on metallurgy and blacksmithing.
I could tell them how to actually make iron, hell I could even tell them how to make proper steel, folded steel even, but why would I tell them such a thing? Give them something that is beyond them, and they just might destroy themselves or worse go on a warmongering spree and enslave those with inferior arms and armor let alone a weak leadership structure.
Keeping the means to make better metal along with the ability to make plated armor, chainmail, studded armor, crossbows, hell seeing how this place is all fantasy and magic 'n shit, maybe steampunk style power-armor. But I'll just keep it to myself, maybe if I can get myself into a position of power within the ranks of these ponies and have my own soldiers, I just might share these secrets of the modern world.
Thank you 'How it's Made' and the Military Channel, your countless hours of boring bullshit on the week days will finally be put to some use.
Once I was given the tour of the second floor we immediately went to the third floor which was just a guest suite, my guess was that the nobles here must on occasion show up here to suck up and kiss the asses of their leaders.
And apparently that is where I am assigned to stay until they can find me a way back, but in all honesty I think I just might stay here. I don't know why but this place might be better than Earth, now if only it had tv and porn then this place will be ideal.
"Now Skolas, while you are staying here you must abide by our laws and rules, I do not want to send you back to the dungeons because you decided to break the law. I will be sending one of the servants to deliver to your room a scroll containing a short list of our laws but to make this easy for you, do not do anything that you know is wrong and you will not have a problem with me. Have a pleasant stay." Princess Celestia said before turning around and trotting off, her sister stayed behind for a few seconds to linger and glare at me before saying some parting words of her own.
"Heed my Sister's command carefully Skolas, fail to listen and thee will spend thy life in the dungeons till death." and with those words I watched the dark winged unicorn trot after her sister, her royal guards following closely behind her as I rolled my eyes and entered my room.
First problem I noticed was that the door was not large enough for me to fit through it. I solved the problem by phase-shifting through the open door before closing it behind me.
My second problem was that the bed was way too small for me. I did not solve this problem at all, I instead had to let my arms, legs and lower portion of my torso to off of the bed. At the very least my head was on a pillow.
And lastly there was my third problem, my bathroom was too damn small, even for me to properly fit in. I guess my only solution to this problem was to tell the princesses that I will either need a larger room and bathroom, or if need be use magic to make it bigger. I know there is a spell out there that can make the room bigger than it really is, I played 'Dungeons and Dragons', that shit should apply here as well...well magic spells and mystical equipment wise anyways.
Letting out a sigh of exasperation I opened my door in time to see a castle servant waiting there, a mare, if the smooth round features are to be believed in, was standing there, scroll in mouth. I took said scroll from her and thanked her before closing the door again, didn't even hear her say your welcome and whatever it is that servants say when they do their job.
When I looked down at the scroll in hand I realized that I had a fourth problem, I couldn't read what was written down on the piece of parchment in my hands.
"You got to be fucking shitting my nuts...I can understand everything they say but I can't understand a word of it on paper...what kind of joke is this? Like seriously, this is some fucked up shit." I said to myself as I put the scroll down and decided that I might as well go see the princesses, maybe they will be so kind as to inform me about the laws or at the very least the basic things so I don't fuck up and get thrown back in jail.
Shaking my head at this world's strangeness to give me a language I can verbally understand and the same one I can't understand writtenly. I think this is just the universes way of fucking with me.
With nothing to do but to wait here until they either come here and get me or they just drop off a cart with food on it in my room while I am asleep...eh, either way I get food. I just hope it isn't hay or god forbid...grass.
Lying mostly off of the bed and with nothing to occupy my time I decided to do what any man does when bored out of their mind and have no means of alleviating boredom.
Sleep it off.
And sleep it off I did, but I didn't get to truly enjoy my nap because exactly two hours later the door to my room opened up to reveal both princesses standing there. The white one was fighting back a smirk at my current position while the dark blue one was simply laughing.
"So We see that thee hath been enjoying thy self. Is thee's bed comfortable?" Princess Luna said as she fought back a few snirks before breaking out into laughter again. Well fuck you to princess, I hope you step on a lego block and it gets stuck in your hoof.
"Well, it has enough give to it so I don't completely sink in it which is good, only downside to it is that I don't completely fit on it." I said truthfully to Celestia, but to Luna she might as well think that I said that in a snarky or snide sided tone.
"We could always have the carpenters guild construct a bedframe that will fit your size if you wish?"
"Nah, I'm good. Only problem I have is the door being too small and the bathroom not fitting my size, but other then that its all good." But I really do wish for a toilet and shower set that I can actually use, mostly the shower part though, smelling like death is the perfect chick repellent and a job ender...I really just hope that if there are any viable women here that none of them are gold diggers or snobby little shits.
"Excellent, we are both hoping that you are willing to answer a few questions for us. You are not in trouble but this will help alleviate any worries that we both might have and also help us understand you better so there won't be any confusion or trouble now or later on down the path." Princess Celestia said as she waved a wing at me, not sure how one can wave a wing like that, those things aren't meant to bend like that but then again I really don't know anything about wing structure and what else they are capable of doing.
"Sure, not like I can say no to the two rulers of a foreign country that I am in without fearing the repercussions of being tortured and/or interrogated for what I know of if I ever said no to you both." I really laid the sarcasm out really thickly on this one. I just couldn't help myself, the inner asshole within me is strong.
And of course the two princesses gave me their best 'Are you serious?' face, Luna's looked much scarier than Celestia's but there is no way I am going to risk the ire of one or both of them so I relented and accepted their questioning.
"So where shall we go for this interrogation? I mean questioning." I said trying to be smooth (Not!) but sadly they did not see it as such. They waited somewhat patiently for me to get my fat ass up off the bed before being led out of the room (I had to short-teleport myself out) and marched straight to the throne room.
Now let me tell you, its a nice throne room. It has two thrones made out of solid crystal, one is a light crystal throne while the other is a slightly dark crystal throne, and for me throne is a bit of an understatement, its more like a very, very low seat. Like, three inches off the ground before being a seat with an elongated back but sadly with no armrests. Those thrones would be pretty sweet if they floated in the air, had armrests and also made you look bigger then you really are.
"Soooo...shall we begin?"
...and what happened next well, lets just say it gave me reason to pause when I suddenly found myself standing in front of the throne room doors, closed tightly but not locked and sealed.
Unlocked, unsealed, and not a single guard in sight. It would seem young Sombra never bothered to fully control the entire crystal guard corps while he still had the chance while I was unconscious. Seems like he still hasn't fully learned from the last time I have managed to stall and bested him.
Staring at the massive doors I checked myself for my weapons only to find out that they are still locked up in the barrack armory, locked up tighter than a tax collector's purse, or back then, tighter then a chastity belt with a missing key. And as for that story...well lets just say that I encountered someone that had an infatuation with me that simply wouldn't die down no matter how many times I rejected it...
And look what that led to...things that at first never seemed to be connected turned out to be a series of events that snowballed into one massive clusterfuck that resulted in the collapse of an empire, the banishment of its capital and the exile of several thousand ponies along with their princesses...
But here we are again...just like last time but with the exception that I am alone, and so is he. This time I will no longer retreat, no longer compromise, no longer regret...this time, I will end this before it takes the lives of those I care about...and this time I will not fail, never again.
Feeling myself for any weapon that may have been left behind during their search and seizure I found that I had nothing on me, nothing but my hidden surprise on my lower arms.
Looks like these will have to do...
With nothing but my wits, my guile, my strength and my sharp tongue I slowly started to push on the doors, the twins creaking as they haven't been oiled in a long while and as I pushed the doors open I saw my target, right where I said he would be.
Sitting there on his throne was the corrupted crystal warlock, my first friend...and my first greatest failure.
Sombra.
"So happy to see you out of the dungeons, brother."
The autism over this story is real.
7106152 Still, you can't blame them, the older one WAS better. Besides, "too similar"? What a load of horseapples. Too popular morelike.
7106264 well the story was going full off the rails and insisting it wasn't.
7106415 it did not go off the rails, it had a sieries of events that it went threw, not like suddenly dragons attacked or anything
7106152 hello dropbear fanboy, if you don't like the story, than don't read it. continued harassment and i will tell the mods
omg such a drastic change to the story, it got so much more dragged out . that and i almost died as soon as i read "Hello darkness my old friend..."
7106152 Hello. If you don't like this story, then go somewhere else. Otherwise, don't say anything because you are choosing to be here.
7106152 Do explain, in my current state of three-hours of sleep only and coffee bingeing I don't really understand.
I loved the old one, and it sucks that it's gone, but I will most likely come to love this in time.
Can't wait for more
Dude good story. I'm making a story myself called a displaced vs. The conversion Bureau. Any tips
7107274 Yeah, make sure that whatever it is you are writing, make sure its not a carbon-copy of someone elses or else the ones you did the copy from will get a mod to drop the hammer on your story and force you to rewrite it. Apparently my was close to Dropbear's but he complained that it was a carbon-copy of his story. Hard to carbon-copy something when it wasn't even the same thing.
7107279 thanks. Mine's about a displaced with the gamer powers fighting the conversion Bureau
7106264 No, plagarism kinda is too similar.
7106551 Dropbear fanboy?
...You are a special little snowflake, aren't you?
7106573 People have a right to opinions bby.
7106678 The fact that people are losing their minds over why this story was taken down. It's pretty stupid honestly.
7107283 Ah, I see. I already did explain why my story was taken down before and if they can't accept that it was taken down because it apparently was a copy of Dropbear's and they are still complaining about it well...just let them be. I moved on from that tragic experience and everyone else should to as well. You are one of the few people who has accepted the story as it is instead of complaining about it.
People, my story was forced to be rewritten because Dropbear reported this story to the mods because this WAS a copy of his story and he didn't like it so the mods put the hammer down on me. This story is being rewritten and that is final, so stop whining and complaining about it being rewritten, if you don't like that it is being rewritten then do please move on.
7107282 Welp, I got nothing then.
7107283 and you do, but it wasn't what you said, it was how. For example, if there was a story I didn't like, if I said something like " This story sucks balls," how, does that help the story get better and fix it's mistakes? Then again, I'm just 14. What the hell do I know
Liked the old story (and happy I have it saved still) but will not blame you for wishing to re-write it. Will retract my favorite for now but keep the like. Will see after chapter 10 if it is still a favorite of mine like the one before. Thanks for keeping writing this in what ever form it may take and no matter what I rate this in future (though would advice to let others be able to get the old copy since it is still a favorite in my heart).
+++ after reading further on the situation I thank you for keeping up with this story in a form of a rewrite and F--k reality:P
Good bit of backstory, and a good display of Skolas's abilities in this setting. Looking forward to more.
7107332 Lol i read the original, and it was good, but this is really good, I like the idea of him meeting the princesses on a good start, and then he rejects them for being weak. This story is going tobe great even better than the last. Cant wait to see more.
7107283 i guess your also a tumbler troll considering that that term is used on people who use tumbler who ask for attention and act better than the others.
7119363 I have already explained it before, try reading the blog that goes with this story.
Oh man. That butchering of Old English. Should be "So We see that thou hath been enjoying thyself. Is thy bed comfortable?" And please, if anyone wants to correct me on this, please do.
7440419
Correction:adverbial phrases we sêon sê êow beneah benugon {been} {enjoyinh} {yourself}. {Is} êower str¯æl {confortable
What is with all this damn exposition in the middle of your story?! It's boring!
10148834
Then don't read it.