Applejacked

by Gregory the Mighty

The Stars Fall

The Stars Fall

The Mare in the Moon, myth from olden pony times. A powerful pony who wanted to rule Equestria, defeated by the Elements of Harmony and imprisoned in the moon. Legend has it that on the longest day of the thousandth year, the stars will aid in her escape, and she will bring about nighttime eternal.

Four large columns of light pierced the night sky, landing in a square formation just outside of ponyville. The four perfect craters smoldered as their contents emerged. They were four ponies. The four stars of prophecy and legend.

The first was Starlight Lament, an alicorn. Like all the stars, her body was adorned with an ethereal starfield, not unlike an Ursa Major. Her stars were of the milky way, and it gave her a dark blue body. Her mane flowed with white and silver, and her long horn glowed with an eerie red light. She wore a tiara of silver, with a jewel encircled in it. Her hooves were also adorned with silver and jewels. Like all the Stars, she had glowing eyes without pupils and no cuite mark to speak of.

The second was Starblight. She was a large earth pony with manic hair. Her body was covered with more stars that Sorrow, giving her a light blue shade. Her hair was dark and manic like Pinkie Pie’s and she wore a wicked grin, one that showed off her pointed teeth.

The third was Starswirl. A unicorn with deep blue with a striped mauve and silver mane. The Corkscrew Nebula in her star coat centered around her flank, almost giving her a cutie mark. Her eyes burned silver and her long horn sparkled with magic light, even when she wasn’t casting a spell.

The fourth and last was Starry Aria. Her eyes were as black as midnight, and her haggard main fell across her face. Her wings were long and majestic, but her tail was long and slithered along the ground like a snake. Her pointed teeth hid a long, forked tongue. Unlike the others, her star field was in her mane and tail and had falling stars drifting in and out of view.

The craters they left made a ring on the hill, Starlight Lament stepped toward the center. “The hour is upon us. Today we reclaim what’s ours and have our revenge!”

The others howled in agreement.

* * *

Twilight tore through the library like a hurricane. “ How could you do this to me!?”

“Do What? I was just minding my own business!” pleaded Discord.

“Get out! I hate you!”

Twilight began lashing out, throwing spells at Discord. Several of them hit him, though they seemed to have no visible effect. The large draconequus got the hint and stopped his verbal protests. He slunk out the door into the rain.

Twilight collapsed into her bed. How could this get any worse?

* * *

The four Stars traipsed into Ponyville.

Starblight smelt the air. “He’s this way. I could smell his foul stench from light years away. He’s in that tree house over there.”

“Excellent.” replied Starlight Lament. As she coked her head, moonlight glistened off her tiara. “Surround him. There will be no escape for him this time.”

It didn’t take long for them to encounter a sad Discord prodding down main street of Ponyville. He could have teleported anywhere in Equestria, but he didn’t. He brazenly walked round the streets of Ponyville, lost in thought, never straying more than a block from Twilight in her library.

His innocent walk became his undoing. Despite the rain, his scent now served as a shining calling card to the Stars. Soon they had traced the scent to the Ponyville Library.

* * *

Rarity purred as she turned to her lover. Spike was content to solve his sudoku. It kept his mind off Twilight. There was something about her new boyfriend that just didn’t seem right. Knowing that they were alone together in the library was enough to give him the heebie jeebies.

“Spike darling, do you think this horn of mine looks... lacking in some way?”

The purple dragon turned to the unicorn. At first he suspected she was going to bring up the subject of horn jobs, but it turned out to be far worse. She was insinuating that she needed and engagement ring. Spike put down his newspaper.

“Yeah, about that …” Spike braced himself. “I looked into that. It turns out ponies are not allowed to marry dragons. It’s in the constitution.”

“Wait... WHAT?!” Rarity was furious. “You have to be kidding me!”

“I’m sorry, but marriage has been legally defined. You can only marry a stallion. I just don’t qualify. I’ve sent several letters to Princess Celestia, but she hasn’t said a word. I think it’s just not in the cards.”

Rarity leapt up in bed, surging with anger and glowing with magic. A second later she stole herself, gasping and gulping down her emotions. “Th-that’s okay. I see where they are coming from. Excuse me dear, I do believe I need some fresh air...”

It was going to be a long night.

* * *

Discord bolted through the front door of the Library. “You have to hide me!! They’re here!”

Twilight crept down the stairs, wiping her tears. A volcanic eruption of anger was just what she needed to stop them. “I’m not hiding you from Celestia, you lout! She and I aren’t speaking, remember?!”

“It’s not her, it’s worse! It’s the Stars! They are four cosmic beings of unimaginable power!”

Twilight didn’t believe the story for an instant, but couldn’t waste an opportunity to take a stab at him. “Oh? And what did you do to them? Love ‘em and leave ‘em?”

“I may have sort of accidentally stolen some of their cosmic powers. But I am TOTALLY not at fault. Buyer beware.”

“Are you going to tell me that in the last five minutes something more terrifying than you wandered into Equestria? Something that hasn’t happened in the last 3000 years?”

“This wouldn’t be the first time tonight we’ve been victims of astronomically bad timing, would it?”

Just then a thud was heard at the door. Then another. Then a violent tremor shook the whole place. The lights all snuffed out. The walls creaked as if the whole of the tree library was being crushed by a giant pair of godlike hooves. It was pitch black.

A ghastly voice began to creak through the wood of the walls. “Diiiiiiiisssssssssssssccorrrrrrrrd....” It was Starblight.

“No! Please don’t!” whined Discord.

A flash of light blinded everything around them. With a horrifying crash, the north wall of the tree ripped apart. A terrifying sound spewed from Starlight Lament’s throught “We have you now!” The south wall vanished. The east and west walls, and the rest of the tree, exploded into a million small pieces.

With the tree obliterated, the two were naked before their attackers. They approached from all sides, one star for each of the four directions. A beam of light shot from each of the four Stars’ mouths. They attached to each of Discord’s Arms and legs. They began pulling him apart.

Discord screamed in agony. The four beams pulled his extremities to their limits. In a painful burst of light, the draconequus seemed to explode.

For a moment, Twilight felt sorry for Discord, and terrified of her own inability to stop them. Twilight ran to Discord. He was smaller now, no bigger than any other pony. He still had a long dragon-like tail and two horns, though they seemed to match more than they did before. In turn, all his limbs just seemed to be normal brown pony legs. His coat was burned. He was covered with bruises. “Help me.”

Twilight looked up. The Stars were all glowing with even more energy than before. They were surrounded by halos of shining light. Their starfield coats had even more stars and they were zipping around almost like comets. They glowed so brightly that it was impossible to look at them without squinting.

“AT LAST! OUR FULL POWER HAS RETURNED!! THE STARS WILL RISE AGAIN!!”

* * *

“Applejack! Please sit down! Let me take care of you!”

“Oh, Luna. I’m two weeks from having a foal. I can barely fit in this booth.”

“I won't’ have you sitting on the floor, cushions or not. You can take that booth all to yourself. I’ll sit out here. Things have been going so well at the farm, I thought you deserved a little treat.”

“It’s so nice of you. I just want you to know you’ve been really great throughout this this whole ordeal.” Applejack and Luna exchanged a glance of longing. Before they could kiss, the others marched through the front door. Applejack turned away and blushed.

Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Spike, and Fluttershy joined them around their booth. “Doesn’t Fluttershy look positively glowing?” stated Rarity.

“I don’t know, she just looks huge to me!” exclaimed Pinkie Pie.

Rarity rubbed her temple. “Pinkie. That’s something we say when a mare is with foal. The more with foal she is, the more she is glowing.”

“Oh, so it’s like me when I ate all those corncakes?”

“No, Pinkie. You were just fat.” scoffed Rarity.

“Um, girls, I sort of have something important to say.” Fluttershy said meekly.

“Oh, Darling! We’re your friends! I’m sure we all know what’s coming. You and Mr. Dash are going to be tying the knot. Getting married. A beautiful, life-affirming marriage!” Rarity began to bawl uncontrollably. The others looked on in shock.

“Urm, I think she’s going to need a moment.” Spike shooed Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy over to the counter to order some ice cream. He would have shooed Applejack too, but he would have needed a shoehorn to get her out of that booth.

Left alone with Rarity, Applejack lent a reassuring hoof. “There there sugarcube. What’s troubling you?”

Rarity dried her tears and sat down in what little space there was left in the booth, opposite Applejack. “I’m sorry, dear. I just found out the most upsetting news. Apparently there is some barbaric law preventing me from marrying a dragon! Can you believe it!”

Applejack was taken aback. “Wow. That’s oddly specific, considering Spike is the only dragon in Equestria...”

“Oh, it simply defines marriage as only between a mare and a stallion. It totally puts Spike out of the picture. It’s so sad.”

“Golly. You two are that serious?”

Rarity stole a smile. “Yes, he is very dear to me. And I’m sorry for you, too, Applejack.”

“Whaddya mean?”

“You and Luna, haven’t you considered marriage by now?”

Applejack blushed as red as her barn. “Er, Uh, I don’t know what yer prattlin on about! Sh-She’s just helping me out on the farm is all!” Being the element of honesty, Applejack was a terrible liar.

“Applejack, you are a terrible liar. You two have been love-dovey ever since she moved in.”

Applejack swallowed a lump in her throat. “Well, I guess I better come out of the stable. She and I have been right close. It’s good to be able to talk about it finally.”

Rarity rubbed her hooves together. There was nothing for getting over the blues like juicy gossip.

“She’s been real nice to me, but she seems different...” said Applejack.

“How so?”

“Ever since that third date, she’s been starved for attention. It’s like she’s a different pony. She’s been wanting it from me day and night. Even with her doing all my chores, I get tired from giving her so much lovin’.”

“Enjoy it while it lasts. Things always change after you’ve … consummated your relationship. Just look at me and Spike. Sweetie, you’re just in the honeymoon-phase of your relationship...” Rarity would have continued, but saying the word ‘honeymoon’ had reminded her of her own problems, and she started to get choked up.

The others came back with ice cream.

“Please girls, you need to hear what I have to say...” cooed Fluttershy.

Rarity chortled. “Fluttershy, please, we all know about Mr. Dash...”

“No! You have to listen to me! Rainbow Dash is gone! The Wonder Bolts called her up suddenly! She said there was a war coming to Equestria!” screamed Fluttershy.

Silence befell the group.

“You don’t think the war’sa comin to Ponyville do ya?” remarked Applejack.

At that very moment an electrical charge flooded the room. The shelves and and metal pans began to shake from the energy. A second later there was a gust of wind and a loud pop like thunder and Twilight Sparkle and a very damaged Discord were teleported to the center of Sugercube Corner.

“What happened!?” screamed Applejack.

“This is an emergency! The town is under attack! Everyone evacuate! Take cover!” Twilight screamed at the top of her lungs.

There weren’t many other patrons in the sweet shop at that time of night, but Daisy stepped up to Twilight. “What do you mean? Is a monster attacking!”

Twilight pointed out the bay window. Ponyville was burning. Starblight was taking to biting ponies with her sharp teeth. Once they were bitten, they started to glow with a bright purple aura. They then began rampaging and destroying everything in their path. Not to mention biting others. Starswirl was simply shooting magic from her horn, knocking over buildings and setting them on fire.

The tall alicorn, Starlight Lament began hacking and coughing. Within a few moments, she began vomiting up a thick, oily glob. The glob came to life and began chasing ponies down.

The pegasus, Starry Aria, did nothing.

Twilight turned to the other ponies. “Mr. and Mrs. Cake? You know that emergency preparedness plan you came up with after Pinkie’s 21st birthday party? The time has come.”

The Cakes nodded in solemn agreement and proceeded to take their children and the remaining patrons down a storm cellar dug a hundred feet deep into the mountainside.

The main five and Luna marched outside.

* * * *

Twilight Sparkle lead the group out into the streets. She winced not at the fires or chaos. She had her heart torn out once tonight by Discord, and she wasn’t going to let that happen again by watching Ponyville fall.

They stared down the Stars on Main Street. At first the Stars could not believe they were being challenged so openly. This led to a belly laugh from each of them as they realized they were being called out for a fight. When they finally accepted the offer, Starlight Lament did all the talking. “Foolish mortals! Do you not comprehend that we are even more powerful than before?” If Rainbow Dash had been there, she would have had a witty comeback--but as it was the only thing they could do was launch into battle.

They fought tooth and hoof. It was like fighting the tide. Nothing they threw at them had any effect. The most powerful of Twilight’s spells flew through them like oil through water. They were immune to Fluttershy’s Stare and none of Applejack’s bucking did the trick. Luna stayed behind, on Applejack’s insistence.

When all seemed lost, a sonic rainboom was heard. From the skies, Rainbow Dash and the rest of the Wonder Bolts had arrived. “Thank Celestia!” decried Twilight. They took to the skies and dive bombed the Stars with a fury of attacks. Their moves were of no effect, however. Not even Rainbow Dash’s Buckaroo Blaze could stop them. They did buy some time for Rainbow Dash to return to her friends.

Dash was still bursting with confidence. “I brought something from Canterlot. Thought these might be useful.” From underwing, Rainbow revealed the Elements of Harmony. They sparkled with a fierce joyful magic and floated to their owners like magnets.

“Alright!” exclaimed Pinkie Pie. She was as elated as all ponies present. The bolts from the Elements of Harmony battered the four Stars. At first it seemed to take effect. The Stars were damaged and enraged by the bolts of pure friendship, but after a few minutes, they shook off the attack. Starry Aria, the pegasus whom until now had been silent, let out a howl. It broke every of glass window in Ponyville.

The Elements shattered into a hundred pieces. The main six were defeated.

“We’re out of options. Luna, it’s up to you!” yelled Applejack.

“Can I have a kiss for good luck?” Applejack abided and the blue alicorn galloped forward. Luna cringed. She was going to need more than a kiss to endure this battle.

She tried lobbing energy bolts from her horn, but that did no good. She tried charging at one, but every time she did, another Star tackled her. She was outnumbered and out-maneuvered. It was clear they were just toying with her at this point.

“I don’t get it. She was so strong when we fought the timberwolves!” Pinkie said.

Applejack felt a deep pain in her stomach. “Did I do this to her? Did living on my farm make her weak?” Applejack couldn’t even finish her thought before Luna was kicked backward in defeat.

Their last hope was lost. They were now surrounded by superior forces and defeat was imminent. The monstrous ponies closed in on them from all sides, their mouths salivating at the thoughts of what they would do to them...

Then a sound came through the darkness. “What is that?” asked Starblight.

The question was answered by a pair of headlights turning on and piercing the darkness. They barrelled down Main Street of Ponyville and collided with Starswirl at full speed! The Star was knocked back a full block. They turned around to hit another star, but it was clear they didn’t have enough momentum for another big impact. They were only buying time for the others.

Big Mac and Granny Smith poked their heads out. “Run! Run while you still can!”

With no choice left, The ponies escaped into the Everfree Forest.

* * *

Starry Aria floated up to the highest point in Ponyville. She landed on top of the weathervane on Pony Hall as gently as a leaf. Tipping her nose to the heavens she began to sing. A low dirge of sorrow and loss. The silk tones of her music flew through the night air, creeping into every alley and crevice of Ponyville.

Soon, the ponies started to react. Stumbling out their doors like zombies. They wore blank expressions and hummed along with the woeful tune. They had been turning ponies to their side before, but now their stranglehold was total. Everypony was now their unwilling slave.

Ponyville was lost.

* * * *

Hours later, the group had reconnoitered at the abandoned Castle of the Sisters. This place had many good and bad memories for the girls. They had their first adventure there, and had revived Princess Luna using the Elements of Harmony.

Discord was thrown into a moldy old chair.

“Talk!” demanded Twilight. Her mane was nearly standing up on end from her rage. The others hadn’t seen her this bad.

“There’s nothing to tell! Centuries ago, the Stars fell to earth, apparently just for a visit, and I tricked them out of their powers. That’s how I had all those phenomenal cosmic powers. They’ve had it out the Earth ever since.”

Rarity stepped in. “Wait, how did you manage to trick them?”

“Oh, that’s not a very interesting story. Though I will say it involves a pick-axe, a suite in Las Pegasus and a bushel of salmon.”

“Let’s focus here!” Twilight snapped. “What are they after?”

“I don’t know! They already have all their powers back. They could do anything!”

Twilight broke off her interrogation and began pacing back and forth around the ruins, furious.

Rainbow Dash stepped forward and spoke in an uncharacteristic sobriety. “With all that power they could take over all of Equestria in a day.”

Twilight’s pacing intensified. “Stars... Stars... and the stars will aid in her escape.” She thought about it. “Luna! The stars are the ones who set Nightmare Moon free after a thousand year imprisonment! They must be going after Luna!”

“Did somepony speak my name?” Princess Luna descended from the heavens. Her hair was clear and full of sparkle. Her eyes glowed with awesome power.

“Wait, if you’re Luna, who’s that over there?!” Pinkie Pie panicked.

The blue haired luna began to scowl. “I suppose the jig is up. I now have no need for any of you stupid ponies anyway. “ In a blinding flash of green light, the smaller Luna transformed into a tall, slender black creature with gnarled wings and a horn. “Behold! It is I, Chrysalis, queen of the changelings!”

“You-You were going to steal my baby and replace it with one of your own!?” screamed Applejack.

“Well, that was the plan. I was hiding in the bushes during your moonlit picnics with the princess. I heard all of the details she disclosed. When she left I took her place and told there was a change of heart. Something about that form changed when exposed to sunlight... but I just went with it. As long as I could get affection from you, I had all the power I could need. Or so I thought. All of the love in Equestria could make me powerful enough to defeat those four monsters. As for your baby, I’ve like to exchange it, but I haven’t had any drones in centuries. I’ve been having sex with Applejack for months and months, but still I have not been able to get pregnant myself!”

Applejack blushed. The group exchanged unsettling looks. Eventually, all eyes rested on Fluttershy. Reluctantly, the yellow pegasus flew over to Chrysalis and whispered something into her ear. As Chrysalis listened to the explanation, her eyes began to widen with understanding. “Oh, right. Penises.”

Comments

[Midnight herald]

and the wat-storm continues in its delightfully meandering path to awesome.

[djthomp]

[SergeantShenanigans]

I- but- when- just- what?

[Seether00]

Um wat? I am kinda confused, when did it turn into an adventure story?

[Hellpony]

This is the only thing I got to say:

[DaBeejees]

The question was answered by a pair of headlights turning on and piercing the darkness. They barrelled down Main Street of Ponyville and collided with Starswirl at full speed! The Star was knocked back a full block. They turned around to hit another star, but it was clear they didn’t have enough momentum for another big impact. They were only buying time for the others.

I literally lol'd when I read this.

Also, this story is getting ridiculous. And I fucking love it!