Pinkie's Sensei

by Dirty Bit

Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Battle of the Century

In a time that would most certainly make physics want to get packing and leave Equestria, Iron Will stood on a newly-crafted fighting ring with his goat flunkees standing at his sides with their blank faces. Explanations are in order, but hey, it's Equestria. Let's go with magic.

Dan tilted his head "What's a minotaur doing in Ponyville all of the sudden?" He turned to Pinkie "Is he a friend of yours, Pinkie?"

Pinkie shook her head "No way! That's self-help guru Iron Will! He taught Fluttershy how to become a totally aggressive meanie-pants!" She looked ahead at him with a slight glare "I dunno why he chose to come back here, though! Doesn't he understand that no means no!?"

Dan scratched his head "Well, what's he doing here now?"

Iron Will turned to Dan and did a random pose as he pointed "Iron Will is getting to that, stringbean! Give him time to explain his awesome idea!"

The Saikyo Master was now burning with rage "STRINGBEAN!?!?" If there was fire behind him, it would possibly burn some of Pinkie's mane. Thankfully, he hasn't reached that level of power in his training yet...

Iron Will called out to the rest of the crowd "As he recalled when he first arrived in Ponyville, Iron Will has noticed a distinct lack of willing and able ponies that wished to seek his guidance in building up both confidence and strength!" He beated his chest for emphasis "So that is why Iron Will decided to see how strong each of you are by holding a tournament for his amusement!!"

The ponies only stared up at him with no applause.

Iron Will stared back, and after a brief moment, he added "Oh, and there's bits involved! Plenty of bits!" The ponies then instantly cheered, causing the minotaur to grin to himself. He then squinted his eyes and searched through the frienzied crowd from his fighting ring 'Where is she!?' Not wanting to stall, he cleared his throat "So anyways! Now that Iron Will has your undivided attention-" He noticed a brown earth pony with a bow tie and an hourglass cutie mark trot off with a bored expression on his face and glared as he called out "UNDIVIDED ATTENTION!!!" The earth pony stopped and looked at him in bemusement "He will be happy to inform you that it's not too late to register for entry into this tournament! All applicants move to that desk over there!" He points to a conventient desk being monitored by a goat with a visor and a pencil in his mouth "Anypony who doesn't enter in this fighting tournament..." He held up his fists aggresively "IS A CHUMP!"

Dan's rage subsided at the mention of money and he grinned to himself "Alright! That's for me right there! Looks like I picked a good time to come to this town after all!"

Pinkie gasped in amazement "You're gonna enter the tournament, Danny-sensei! Awesome! I wanna enter, too!"

Rarity, while tempted at the amount of money rewarded for fighting, could not possibly get her hooves dirty over some mere fights. Unless somepony were to touch one scale on Spike's cute little head, however... "Well it would be nice to see where Pinkie has obtained her skill! I'll be cheering for both of you if you actually wish to enter!"

Pinkie nodded with a smile "Thanks for the support, Rarity!" She turned to Twilight "Twilight, how about you? Doncha wanna win all that sweet moolah!?"

The lavender bookworm looked over at the cheering crowd "I'm not exactly sure...The money could be used to buy more books or perhaps donated to Ponyville Elementary for more books." Books and books and books...Thus is the mind of our local adorkable librarian Twilight Sparkle.

Applejack smirked "I'm definitely enterin' that tournament! That money'll do jus' fine fer th' farm!" She turned to Pinkie and Dan "Looks like it's gonna be us three! Too bad Rainbow ain't here to enter with th' rest o' us..."
_____

Meanwhile, at Fluttershy's cottage (I'll bet you read that in the Superfriends announcer's voice), the timid mare was enjoying a nice cup of tea while she watched Rainbow Dash sleep on the couch "I wonder how Mr. Hibiki is enjoying himself in Ponyville..." There was a faint sound of applause that was heard outside of her home, and her ears perked up to it as she turned to the door "What's going on out there?" She ignored the cyan pegasus for a moment as she trotted out the front door and looked over her porch to see many ponies gathered at town square "Oh my...Whatever it is it must be big." Part of her wanted to come, but she couldn't leave Rainbow Dash unattended "Oh well..." She trotted back into the cottage and shut the door.
_____

Ponies lined up for registration and each one present eagerly signed their names on the paper and prepared themselves for opponent placement. Dan, Pinkie, and Applejack already took care of their signatures and awaited the tournament standings with the rest of the fighters.

Iron Will went over all of those who signed and for some odd reason grunted in disapproval 'Ponyfeathers! She didn't sign up at all! She can't be hiding from me...is she?' He snapped his fingers as a goat approached him wearing a ballot box for a hat. You ever wonder why they have to make those stupid faces? Well, I don't blame you. Anyways, the minotaur spoke "Alright, now that tournament registration is closed, we will now start the match ups! First up is...Pinkie Pie? What the hay kind of name is Pinkie Pie?"

The party pony in question eagerly bounded towards Iron Will "That's my name, silly! What do I do now?"

Iron Will pointed to the goat with the ballot box "Pick a number from that box and that will be where you will stand in the tournament standings! Oh, Iron Will can't stand redunant terms!" He snorted in disapproval.

Pinkie giggled "Well, Pinkie can't wait to get started!" She hopped to the ballot box and sported an eager grin "Come to mamma!" The party pony dug her hoof into the ballot box and shifted it left and right before she finally picked up a ball. She read the number and smiled "Look, Danny-sensei! I'm number 1!"

For the first time since he arrived in Ponyville, Dan Hibiki felt jealous and donned a forced smile "Very good, Pinkie! Way to show those hoof-picking skills!"

His student giggled as she hopped away while two goats managed a lined chart. One of the goats held a marker in its mouth and drew a picture of Pinkie Pie under the first line in record time. Seriously, are they smart or dumb? This is going to be an issue for those wishing to look into it...

Iron Will then looked at the sign-up sheet "Next up is...Applejack! Weird...When can cereal fight?" Since Cocoa Puffs.

Applejack trotted up and dug in her hoof into the ballot box and pried out a ball. She read the number "Number 7! Heh, lucky me!" The cowpony smiled to herself and took her place back with the crowd while the goat with the marker drew an immaculate portrait of Applejack under the seventh tournament line.

Iron Will then looked at the sign-up sheet "Next is...Dan Hi-...Hehbecky? Heebeekee?"

Dan gritted his teeth "Hibiki! Dan Hibiki! Saikyo Master extraordinaire!"

Iron Will was unamused "Never heard of you...Pick your number so we can move things along!"

The Saikyo Master grumbled to himself as he trotted over, but then held a face of determination as he dug his hoof in and fished out another ball. He then read the number "Number 13!" The goat drew a crude picture of Dan under the thirteenth line and noticed how it paled in comparison to the last two "Oh come on!!!"

Tournament placement lasted for about a half hour, and it was a good time, considering there had been an amount of 42 combatants participating in Iron Will's tournament. The minotaur stomped to himself and growled "This doesn't make any sense! Iron Will was sure this would work! He-" He forgot that he turned his back on his combatants and the audience while he vented and quickly turned to face them as he regained his composure and cleared his throat "Well, now that we've set up who will be pummeling who into dust, we can finally begin the first round of this tournament!"

A pony in the audience called out "How long is this going to last??" Looks like some ponies have better things to do than watching many fighters pummel each other into submission.

Iron Will replied "That will be determined with how strong these fighters are!" He turned to the fighters "Iron Will hopes for your sake that you do not disappoint him with any slip-ups!" He turned to Dan "That goes double for you, stringbean!"

Dan growled and pointed a hoof "You don't know who you're messing with, pal!"

Iron Will deadpanned "Iron Will begs to differ..." He held his hands up "To place the rules of battle in a nutshell, anypony fighting will be eliminated either through ring-outs or knockouts!"

Applejack called out "What about th' pegasi? They have the advantage in th' air for Celestia's sake!"

Iron Will simply responds "Knockout! First battle is Pinkie Pie verses Roid Rage!"

The pegasus in question rose up and held up a hoof "YEEEEEEEAAAH!!" His face was plastered with aggressive determination, hardened experience, and yes, steroids. Why do you think they call him that? Why do you think his wings are so small? Why did you bother answering these pointless questions when a fight's about to start?

Pinkie and Roid Rage stood on both ends of the fighting ring, Pinkie still in her Saikyo ghi as she stared down her opponent. The party pony grinned with a sense of hotblooded courage while Roid Rage simple bore his teeth like he does after yelling his signature catchphrase.

Iron Will pulled out a gong and stick from behind him while he held a stoic expression "Begin!" He struck the gong with his stick.

Steam poured from Roid Rage's nostrils as he whinnied and charged at Pinkie "YEEEEEEEAAAAH!"

Pinkie simply stood her ground while the monstrous pegasus closed the distance between them. When he got close, the party pony moved out of the way while Roid Rage zipped past her and flew off the stage "NOOOOOOOOOOOO-" He crashed into a deserted cart that sold cabbages. Whoever ran that cart will not be happy when he returns...

Iron Will was dumbfounded, but then he proclaimed the victor "Pinkie Pie wins by ring out!"

Pinkie hopped up and down "Wohoo! I didn't have to lift anything! This is gonna be so easy!" She already felt more invigorated that she would spread the teachings of Saikyo through beating up other ponies in a tournament for her sensei.

After the next two matches flew by with an inadequate display of skills, namely slap fights, Iron Will called the next two "Applejack and Blossomforth!"

Applejack chuckled "Heh, So Ah get a pegasus like Pinkie? This oughta be fun!" She trotted to the ring and noticed her opponent.

She was not familiar with most ponies like Pinkie, but she noticed how the white pegasus held a manestyle similar to Twilight's only it's pink. What she also noticed was just how flexible she was while she performed her pre-fight stretching. Applejack was almost tranced until she shook herself "Why do ya hafta stretch yerself like that so much? Are ya a three time Twister champion or somethin'?"

Blossomforth glared at Applejack and huffed "Why does everypony keep dissing what I do?" She got on her feet and pointed "I made it perfectly clear to Rainbow Dash just a week ago that what I'm doing is an ancient practice called Yoga!"

Applejack raised an eyebrow "Yoga? What in tarnation is that?"

The pegasus smirked as she assumed a defensive stance "I'll be showing you while you fall at my hooves!"

Applejack chuckled "Ah think the horseshoe's gonna be on th' other foot there, missy! Let's dance!" She stood her ground and awaited the start of her match.

Iron Will held out his gong and stick "Begin!" He struck the gong with his stick.

Applejack pawed at the ground and then charged at Blossomforth with fire in her eyes "Yer in fer a world o' hurt! Let's see yer stretchin' help ya this time!"

Blossomforth simply gave a smug smile as she simply sidestepped the cowpony and grabbed her side with her forelegs "It's called..." The pegasus lifted her opponent "Yo...GA!" She then tossed Applejack back to where she began her charge with minimal effort.

Applejack got up and glared "Lucky shot! Here Ah go again!" She then galloped towards Blossomforth and quickly turned herself to a bucking position. When she skidded in front of the pegasus, she quickly brought out her hindlegs for a good old-fashioned applebuck.

Sadly, her hooves hit the air. When she turned, she noticed Blossomforth in an Ustrasana pose as the cowpony's legs went through the gap between the pegasus' back and forelegs. Blossomforth flashed a smug gaze at Applejack as she stuck out her tongue.

Applejack growled as she brought back her hindlegs and quickly turned to swipe with her left foreleg. Once again, her hoof connected with the air when she noticed Blossomforth quickly go into a Salabhasana pose. The cowpony growled in irritation "Why doncha stop posin' and start fightin!?"

Blossomforth rose to her feet "Very well!" She flew back and then shot her right foreleg forward. To everypony's surprise, her foreleg stretched as if it were taffy being pulled in a machine. It connected with Applejack's muzzle and quickly retracted while the cowpony bounded back and found herself at the tip of the ring the moment she recovered.

Applejack shook herself and stared in shock and bemusement "What in tarnation!? How'd ya do that?"

Blossomforth donned a predatious smile "Years of practice!" She took another shot with her right foreleg while it extended like rubber.

Applejack was ready as she sidestepped the elongated hoof and quickly charged in before it retracted. She then reeled her own hoof back and brought it towards Blossomforth's face with unrelenting force.

The pegasus flew back after the delivered hit along with her retracted hoof and her expression of pain was slowly replaced with a shady smile. While one of her hindlegs was raised in mock imbalance, she swung it as it stretched like her forelegs. This time, it connected with Applejack's stomach as she skidded back from the hit. She coughed until she found her breath "Now that's jus' plum unfair!"

Blossomforth drew back her stretched hindleg and stretched herself in an Urdhva Danurasana pose as she stuck out her tongue again "What's the matter? Can't handle my style?" The question was pointless with the amount of drooling stallions in the audience. Even Dan was enraptured with the display of Yoga.

Applejack glared as she stared down her opponent. She couldn't lose this now. This was for the money, for her farm, and for her family. The cowpony then galloped forward with her spirits reinvigorated.

However, Blossomforth anticipated this as she jumped into the air and hovered while she bent back her hindlegs to where they were clasped behind her head while she held her forelegs together "Come with me, friend..." She then stretched out her forelegs as she grabbed Applejack by the shoulders and propelled herself in the air while she kept her grip. Then she yanked herself downward at an amazing speed.

Applejack looked up "What th-" Both her's and the stretchy pegasus' heads met, and she brought herself upward and performed the same gesture two more times.

When Blossomforth brought herself up for the fourth time, her forelegs twisted and she readied herself for the finisher "Yoga..." She then brought herself down as her head clashed with Applejack's while spinning at a remarkable speed "Shangri-La!!" When she finished, she leaped off of the cowpony as she fell down on the ring unconscious.

Pinkie gasped with an expression of sheer worry "Oh no! Applejack! She's been stretched into submission!"

Dan turned to Pinkie "I think the term you're looking for is headbutted, Pinkie."

Pinkie turned to Dan with her expression unchanged "That too!"

Iron Will brought up the hand he held his gongstick with "Blossomforth wins by knockout!" Well, so much for Applejack getting money...

The next two rounds flew by quickly as well. What was wierd was that one of them happened to be not a combat battle but a rap battle. It was epic, though. Iron Will then called up "Next up is Stringbean-"

"Dan Hibiki!!"

Iron Will continued "-versus Mr. Waddle!" Both Iron Will and Dan looked around to see where the pony in question was at. They then heard the sound of a withering moan as a decrepid earth pony wearing glasses and a bow tie trotted up. The minotaur and Dan looked at each other and then winced at the old pony that showed himself. Iron Will reluctantly pointed "Are you-"

The old pony looked around "Did somepony call my name?" Yep, it's him alright.

Iron Will facepalmed and pointed "Onto the ring, you two! Let's go!"

Dan and Mr. Waddle made their way onto the ring and stood at each side. The Saikyo master was slightly reluctant until he remembered battling a crazed assassin with the same age some point in his life. He then stood his ground while Mr. Waddle stood obliviously with his limbs shaking from his old age.

Iron Will held up his gong and stick as he called out "Begin!" He then struck the gong as the battle began.

Dan gritted his teeth and waited for the old pony to make his move, but all Mr. Waddle did was stand idly by with a scared look on his face. The Saikyo master then lowered his guard and began to feel pity for the old pony as he trotted up to him "Hey, you think it would be a good idea to throw the fight? I mean, sure the reward's tempting and all, but I don't think you're cut out for this sort of actio-"

Mr. Waddle's face was quickly replaced with a hardened glare as he quickly jumped and struck Dan's muzzle with his left hindleg. The Saikyo master yelped after the hit and rolled back towards his side. He then got up and rubbed his nose before he glared back at the old man who once feigned weakness "Oh, it is ON!"

Rarity could not help but glare at Dan for some reason.

Dan then galloped forward and then performed his famous Dankukyaku on Mr. Waddle, but he blocked each blow with relative ease. Mr. Waddle then gave a rolling hook that connected with Dan's right jaw as he flew back again.

Pinkie was punching the air with her forehooves as she called otu to her sensei "C'mon, Danny-sensei! Show that meaniepants who's boss!"

Dan got up as he rubbed his jaw from the latest hit, but then he grinned his shiny teeth once again. It was time to make this battle quick and painless for the Saikyo master's elderly opponent. He then performed the signature pose of flexing his right foreleg while his left one rested over the bicep "Ikuzo ora!"

Pinkie clopped her hooves together "Oh! He's gonna do one of his special moves! And he's speaking Neighponese finally!!"

Twilight was now curious as she watched "What's it gonna be, Pinkie?"

Pinkie turned to Twilight "He's gonna perform a combo where he combines two of his greatest moves to beat his enemies with a stick! Only that stick's gonna be his fists!" She then looked down "But then again, I know plenty of people who fight using a stick, but they have buttons at the side!"

Twilight ignored her friend's rambling and focused solely on the techniques Dan was about to perform

Dan rolled once and posed again "Ora ora!" He did it again "Doushita doushita?" And again "Namen jya nezo!" and again "Torosugi daze!" and once more "Yahoo!" He then hopped over the more-than-confused Mr. Waddle and landed on his hind legs as he held a hoof up "Chou Yoyuse!" He grinned at everypony. Everypony was dumbfounded and went to ask what in the hay just happened until Dan quickly spread his forelegs with determination in his eyes "Saikyo Ryuu Ougi!" He then crossed his forelegs and dashed towards Mr. Waddle. When he was close, Dan brought out his right forehoof and struck the old pony clear in the jaw "Let's go!" He then performed what appeared to be a more advanced version of the combo Pinkie demonstrated on Rainbow Dash. He finished with an uppercut that connected with Mr. Waddle's stomach and lifted him up.

K.O!!!!!

Everypony but Dan wondered where that ominous yell came from, but they then turned to hear Mr. Waddle yell in defeated pain before he flew out of the ring and landed on his back. When Dan touched the ground with his hindlegs, he held up a hoof and grinned his teeth as they shined. Sadly, nopony applauded at his victory, and were more focused on the voice that appeared out of nowhere.

Dan trotted to the edge of the ring where Mr. Waddle fell and pointed a hoof at the old pony as he glared down at him "Don't you even THINK about suing me for damages, gramps!"

Iron Will gave an exasperated sigh "Stringbean wins by ringout! Whoop-de-doo..." He then looked away as he brooded to himself 'This isn't working! But Iron Will will know that she'll come around eventually! He jsut knows it!' Who the hay is he talking about?

End of Chapter 4

Comments

[Dirty Bit]

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Surprise...

[Gizmo Hibiki]

So I am guessing that the old pony is......Gen?

[Dirty Bit]

755693 lol no, Dan faced Gen before. Mr. Waddle's just one of those badasses in disguise

His victory quote was a reference, though

[Path_of_cloud]

No quips from Spike with all this manly combat going on crazy. I'm a fighter and I've never see anyone use yoga in combat... but suddenly I really want to face someone who does.

[Hobopony11]

Good ol' Dhalsim's Yoga stretch attacks. I hate and love them at the same time.

[TheAlmightySage]

The Goats are so smart, they are dumb.