The Loser's Booth

by Pickleless

Be Very Very Quiet

When Electric Koolaid walked into the Loser's Booth, he thought he suffered as much as he could today.

And then he saw her.

---

"LIIIIKE, OHMAGOSH KOOOOLAAAAAID, THAT'S LIKE, SUCH A SAAAD STOOORYYYYYYYY~~!" CELES SCREAMED.

"W-O-O-O-W, I DIDN'T THINK YOU COULD BE THAT HORRIBLE OF A PONY!" ELMER YELLED WITH A MIRTHFUL LAUGH.

"WELL YOU KNOW HOW IT GOES GUYS! I THOUGHT I WAS THE BEST FRIEND KILLING ALL MY WORST FRIENDS. TURNS OUT, I WAS THE WORST FRIEND KILLING ALL MY BEST FRIENDS." ELECTRIC SHOUTED, BLUSHING.

"HAHA, OH WOW. YOU'VE COMMITTED A LOT OF MURDER TODAY!"

"YEEEEAAAAH!!! HE'S LIKE. TOTALLY BALLS OF THE WALLS MAAAAAAN!" CELES BROKE OUT INTO GIGGLES.

"ANYTHING TO GET MY BEST DAD ON IF YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING!" ELECTRIC POSED COOLLY.

"OH I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING BRO-BRO!" ELMER STARTED TO DANCE ON THE TABLE!

"As the cogs of fate creak against our favor, we strive to do what is right. Even as our loved ones, society, nature, and us ourselves combat against what we believe in. We pursue our right of happiness as our forefathers before us have. The right to serve justice and the peace of heart from salvaging harmony from the chaos amongst us." Celes shuddered. " Morale runs low as we are knocked down. As Mr. Koolaid has stated evil only prevails when good does nothing, yet here we are trampled and beaten. Tired in heart and as pony, hope seems lost to us all."

"Pony is not perfect. One never simply does good for the sake of good itself. We fight for our ideals, our morals, the things we take pride in. By building self respect through praise of others and one self, we gain strength to stand up and fight for what we believe in. We fight for the ones we love. The miracle, the work of harmony that brings a select few individuals together in peace." Electric stopped to take a sip of his drink. "But what if our ideals and morals are taken away? What if...what if the ones we love are taken away, never to be returned? What is there left to fight for? I have no religious zeal over this. There is no money or power to be gained. No moral obligation left to fulfill. I indeed am tired, in heart and as pony..."

"What is morality? A concept created by who? The Maker? We don't even know if it exists. If so, where does it originate from, and why do we strive to maintain such ethical harmony amongst us all?" Elmer pondered, "If we consider that Morality is simply a concept created by us sapient creatures for us sapient creatures, then perhaps the question one should ask is "What does morality mean for me?' We have lost loved ones, society frowns upon us, and it seems that mother nature itself looks at us as rejects. But deep down we had reasons we respected ourselves for for challenging danger. It would be best if we were to search deeper within ourselves for a solid, conclusive answer before folding our hand against fate."

"WOOOOOOOOOOW, I AM LIKE, SO TOTALLY TIIIIIREEEEED!" CELES WHINED.

"YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE FIGHTING YOUR WORST FRIEND, TURNS OUT, YOU WERE FIGHTING YOUR BEST FRIEND!" ELMER TOOK A LARGE SWIG OF HIS DRINK!

"WOAH HO HO HO! I REALLY WISH YOU WOULD STOP TALKING TO ME!" ELECTRIC SAID, PATTING ELMER ON THE BACK."

"WOW DUDE, THE GOVERNMENT IS TOTALLY TRYING TO KILL US!"

KOOLAID JUMPED ONTO THE TABLE AND STARTED TO JAM! "DEMONS WANT ME DEAD~! DEEEEEMONS WANT ME DEAD, DEEEEEMONS WANT ME DEAD, DEEEEEMONS WANT ME DEAD~! DEMONS WANT ME DEAD~! DEEEEEMONS WANT ME DEAD. DEEEEEMONS WANT ME DEAD, DEEEEEMONS WANT ME DEAD~!"

"HAHA YEAH MOTHERBUCKER!!!" CELES THREW A GLASS AT KOOLAID'S HEAD!

"Perhaps, if we are to dig deeply we should simply forget the concept of morality and look at what our carnal drive was, and see if we can reclaim it." Celes mused. "Watching and managing a government that is so dependent on me is horrifying. Every day I threaten to break under the stress. Instead of becoming detached from my ponies, so I would not become hurt if they were to strike out against me, I was completely immersed. Rather than governing and protecting my little ponies being a large portion of my life, it simply WAS my life. I invested such deep emotional and protective bonds towards every single one so I could draw strength upon it. It was the strength I used to lift the burden of servitude. That is way it is so mind breaking and painful for me not to be Celestia. Protecting the ones below is my only reason to live. I need them to need me. If my little ponies, Luna, or Twilight don't need me to protect them, then what reason do I have to live?"

"You forget, you are but a small child..." Electric whispered. "You need not strive for such a great cause. You may not be able to protect all your little ponies, and rightly so, it is not your responsibility to bear. But this does not mean you can't protect somepony. You have stated is not justice that fuels you but self validation. Then validate yourself by protecting just somepony, not everypony. If you can make a difference for just one pony, I think that's alright."

"I am small child! Unstable and misinformed! I have no strength or skills to draw upon! I am useless, and the world simply wishes for me to be locked up in asylum, where I can't cause trouble! For that is what I am, trouble! Nothing but trouble..."

"If the goddess of the sun accepts a outcast changeling like me. I would be honored." Elmer murmured.

"It would bring ease to my heart to know I have Celestia looking out for me." Electric said with a smile.

"I-I am not really royalty, or anyone powerful, why would you want me?"

"You're a royalty to me, Celes." Elmer said, laying a hoof on her shoulder.

"I would be honored to have you protecting me." Electric said, laying a hoof on the opposite shoulder.

The Princess released a choked sob.

WOOOOOOOOW GUUUUUYS!!! LIFE CAN BE PRETTY COOL SOMETIMES!!! CELES SAID, SLAMMING HER HEAD INTO THE TABLE!

"WOW, YOU'RE A USELESS PIECE OF CRAP!" ELECTRIC SAID SMACKING CELES IN THE FACE.

"GOOD THING I'M YOU'RE USELESS PIECE OF CRAP! STUPID IDIOT!" CELES SAID, SLAMMING HER HOOF BETWEEN HIS LEGS!

"AW MAN, GOTTA BE THE WORST FRIENDS!" ELMER SAID, POSING!

"FIIIIIIIINE WIIIIIIIINE! OH FIIIIIIIINE WIIIIIIIINE! WHERE ARE YOU FINE WIIIIIIIIIINE?!? I NEED MORE FINE WIIIIIIIIIIINE!!!" CELES WHINED!

"AWWWWW YEEEEEEEAAAAAH!!!" ELECTRIC SAID, BOUNCING IN PLACE!

"I THOUGHT I WAS HELPING MY DAUGHTER!"

"INSTEAD I WENT TO A SLAUGHTER!"

"I HAD TO SAVE THE CASTLE!"

"BUT IT WAS TOO MUCH OF A HASSLE!"

"CHANGELINGS WANTED TO PAINT THE SKY ORANGE!"

"THEY'RE-"

"OHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYY GOOOOOOSH! SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!!! YOU'RE TOTALLY RUINING MY BUZZ!!!" CELES YELLED!

"WOW!!! I DIDN'T THINK I WAS THAT BAD OF PONY BEING!" ELECTRIC BLUSHED.

"HAHA!!! YOU THOUGHT WRONG YOU FILTHY MONGREL!!!" ELMER SCREAMED!

"I wasn't protecting my daughter out of self worth. I was simply because I love her. With my daughter and wife gone, I don't know what to do anymore. They were my sole reason. My sunflower. My ray of light. It's very hard for me to keep focus on one thing. If I don't have something to pour my love into, I can't stay focused long enough to...well, simply live life. I need somepony to focus on, somepony to love. But what pony could ever love a unicorn like me?"

"I don't have any parents or siblings, I need somepony to love me..." Celes quietly said.

"I never been loved before for who I am." Elmer gave a humorless laugh.

"I'm brash, loud, annoying, impulsive, and even dangerous. I'm also pessimistic, mean, pathetic, and unnerved. Would you really want the attention of somepony like me?"

"I would love to have you dote on me." Celes curled up next to him.

"If you can love a changeling, you are worth more than you think." Elmer gave a gentle smile.

---

"So..." Elmer quietly said, getting the other two's attention. "I think... I think I should probably take my turn now."

Celes gave a weak smile. "Don't be shy, it's been a truly difficult day for all of us. I know that what you have to say might anger me, but... I promise not to bite."

"...I wouldn't make that promise, if I were you."

Celes and Koolaid frowned.

"I should probably start with how I came to Canterlot..."

Electric stared at the little girl next to her. Feeling the tears building up again. The sweet little filly who has suffered as much as he has.

The filly who looked just like her.

Author's Note:

Changelings wanted to paint the sky orange.
They're like some sort of monstrous sporange.

Comments

[Bright Melody]

Celes is Electric's daughter! If I'm correct you all owe me a chocolate chip cookie. I love this story, and why is a like 5 or 6 year old drunk?

[The Letter J]

Changelings wanted to paint the sky orange.
They're like some sort of monstrous sporange.

Hey, don't generalize changelings like that. There are also groups of changelings that want to paint the sky purple and silver.

It was fun reading Electric Koolaid's narration in the past few chapters, but it got kind of confusing here when he's narrating the dialogue of several different characters. Especially when he's in "loud and obnoxious" mode.

[Pickleless]

4303498
It's moving on to Elmer's, who isn't, well, Koolaid.

[Wolf Wytch]

4285844 she's drunk because she asked the barkeep for some fancy dessert wine, and he was all like "I really shouldn't" and then she was all like "Bitch, did i ask for your opinion? Get me some bucking booze!" and he was like "Fine, whatever." and now she's drunk.

[shaithis1]

Glad to finally be done with EK"s weird and hard to follow monologue