• Published 29th Mar 2014
  • 2,013 Views, 75 Comments

Rarity on DXM - Majin Syeekoh

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Impasses Are So Passé

Twilight stared in horror at the malicious violence that Sombra had caused, then shook her head. She didn’t have time to grieve for her friends’ injuries right now.

“So...what should we call you?” she asked as she moved behind the library desk, sitting down. Rarity kept her eye trained on Twilight. Guess he’s not much of a talker. Sighing, she said, “Well, since you’re being so helpful, I’ll suggest a name. How about Sombrarity?” Rarity raised an eyebrow. “You see, it combines both of your names. I motion that we call you Sombraity. Do I have a second?”

“MMMM-MMMPH!” Pinkie strangled out.

“All those in favor?” Twilight asked, raising a hoof. Pinkie flipped on her back, raising her hooves in the air. “All those opposed?” Sombrarity raised a hoof. “Well then, with two for and one against, motion passed. Welcome to my library, Sombrarity.” Sombrarity grunted in derision. “By the way, Sombrarity, how did you get the dildos to penetrate?” Sombrarity raised an eyebrow at Twilight. “The sex toys.”

“Elucidate.”

Twilight peered at Sombrarity quizzically, then turned a deep shade of crimson as she realized what he(she?)was asking. She steepled her hooves in front of her face, then said, “Huh...I guess they didn’t really have sex toys in your time...well, how do I put this most efficiently?” Twilight looked down, then put her hooves on the desk, then looked up. “They’re...devices designed to relieve...sexual tension in a mare.” Sombrarity stared confusedly at Twilight, looked back at the dildos, then turned scarlet as it hit him. Twilight looked away, then turned back to Sombrarity. “Well, now that that’s out of the way, how did you get them to penetrate?” Sombrarity, now in his element, floated the dildo he had aimed at Spike’s head over, spun it in front of Twilight, then launched it at the wall as Twilight watched in wonder as it stuck into the wall. Sombrarity then yanked it out of the wall and floated it back to Spike’s head.

“Hmm...interesting. I suppose that the spinning would increase the penetrative power.” Sombrarity shook her head, which Twilight raised an eyebrow at. “Then why do you spin them?”

“Stability.”

“Stability? I guess that would apply over longer ranges, but we’re talking close-range combat here.” Sombrarity shrugged. Twilight frowned. “I guess I can’t expect you to cooperate...so, how did you come about, um, ‘borrowing’ Rarity?” Sombrarity grinned malevolently.

“Crystals.”

“Crystals?” Twilight asked. Sombrarity motioned to the papers in front of Twilight. “Oh, you want to see my papers? Go ahead!” she said with a smile. Sombrarity grasped the papers and a quill with her magic and brought them over to her. She shuffled through them, then underlined a passage and handed them back to Twilight along with the quill. Twilight picked up the paper that Sombrarity had underlined and read the passage.

Dextromethorphan in its natural state is a crystalline structure.

Huh?

Dextromethorphan in its natural state is a crystalline structure.

Twilight looked up at Sombrarity with an incredulous look on her face. “You’re kidding.” Sombrarity shook her head, then produced a paper with her magic and levitated it over to Twilight. Twilight grasped it with her magic and studied it. She pored over it for a few minutes, then looked up at Sombrarity. “I don’t get it. This is just the chemical structure for Dextromethorphan. What am I looking at here?” Sombrarity shook her head, grasped a quill in her magic, and circled a certain part of the chemical, upon which Twilight’s eyes widened. “Oh, Celestia...this is a Soulcatcher Crystal! But somehow you’ve managed to attune this to your own soul...but you wouldn’t have been able to do this in your current form, or even in your shadow form, which means…” Twilight looked up at Sombrarity with a newfound respect. “Well, you certainly know how to plan ahead, I know that much...but this is insane! How would you even have this knowledge of chemistry a thousand years ago?” Twilight shook her head. “Something doesn’t add up…” she said. Sombrarity nodded.

“Friend.”

Twilight stared at Sombrarity, not knowing what to to make of that. “Who would make friends with you?” Something then hit her. “Starswirl.” Sombrarity shook her head. “Time traveler?” Sombrarity nodded.

“Hypothetically.”

“Hypothetically? What does that even mean, ‘hypothetically’? How is one hypothetically a time traveler?” Sombrarity, however, refused to respond. Instead, he tried to impale all of Twilight’s friends’ heads, which Twilight was prepared for, for she trapped all of the dildos with her magic, along with Sombrarity. What she failed to catch, however, was the buttplug that now sailed towards her horn, pinging it quite viciously, causing her to drop her hold and rub her horn dizzily. Sombrarity took this chance to escape the library. After recovering from the blow, she sat there and thought for a second. Where would Sombra go at a time like this? Rarity’s, perhaps? No, that doesn’t make a lick of sense. It then hit her in the head like a sack of potatoes. The pharmacy! Twilight stood up and looked at her options of who to take with her and cringed.

She had momentarily forgotten about the display of utter brutality that Sombrarity had displayed, leaving only Pinkie intact, being bound and gagged. Sighing, she tried to undo the ball gag that was wrapped in Pinkie’s mouth, only to find that her magic wasn’t quite working yet. Shaking her head, she trotted up to Pinkie Pie and fumbled with the clasp in her hooves. I will never understand how earth ponies get along with just hooves. She finally got the clasp undone, leaving the ball gag to drop to the floor. Pinkie took a large gasp of air.

“Oh Twilight thank you I thought I was a goner when Sombrarity bound me up but you saved me from that super-duper meanie and could you please untie my legs and save all of our friends?” Twilight nodded and untangled Pinkie Pie’s legs, letting her stand up and stretch them. “So you gonna save everypony else?”

Twilight shook her head. “I can’t. My magic isn’t working right now, and with no way to cauterize their wounds, I’ll have no way to stop the blood flow when I remove the...dildos.” Twilight then trotted up to Applejack and looked down at her, Applejack looking up hazily. “Listen, Applejack, I’m coming back for you. I’m coming back for all of you. I just need to catch Sombrarity, ok?” Applejack weakly nodded, then twitched her head up. Twilight lowered her ear to Applejack’s mouth.

“Give 'em a good whuppin' for me, ya hear?” Applejack whispered into Twilight's ear. Twilight giggled and lifted her head back up.

“I will, don’t you worry.” Twilight then looked over to Pinkie Pie and nodded towards the door. “Pinkie Pie, we’re going to the pharmacy.”

Pinkie looked at Twilight with a confused look on her face. “Why?”

Twilight shook her head. “No time. I’ll explain on the way.” With that, Twilight Sparkle galloped out the door, Pinkie Pie shrugging and following in her wake.