6283293 TLR: Damn you to the fiery pits of hell! I hope you get duck-taped to a chair and forced to watch G3.5 My Little Pony! You killed off one of the most masculine characters! *Curls up in a corner of a shower and starts sobbing as cold water runs over TLR's body* Ulysses: I think you did smashing! His corpse still happens to be around by any chance, right?
6283338 Ulysses: Yes, you're beautiful! And make sure to take a barbed and rusty pole covered in sandpaper and use it as a dildo on your next victim! But seriously, where's the corpse of Big Mac? It's only a matter of time before TLR Gets back out of the shower and gets his act together. I'm willing to pay. Cervantes: Ulysses, what the hell do you want with an anthropomorphic corpse of Big Macintosh? Ulysses:... Stuff... *Ulysses kicks a grimy cardboard box filled with farming tools and all sorts of other bladed equipment underneath the bed* Ulysses: Just wanted to break in my new toys is all. Cervantes: Oh for the love of- Don't listen to him. He's a cannibalistic twenty-seven year-old schizophrenic who has a hard on for blades and torture. Ulysses: Oh thank you for those compliments! Cervantes: You see that? Right there. *Facepalms, and sighs heavily* Cervantes: Fuck this, I'm out. *Cervantes walks out the door* Ulysses:... sooo... how much for the corpse now? And would you like that in cash or credit?
6283597 I never stated that dog tags were required as proof of a soldiers death, I merely said that's all that would be left of a man from certain kinds of explosions. That, and enough remaining charred flesh and entrails to fill a 40 oz. Slurpee cup.
6283896 Ulysses: Woohoo! Crack out the frying pans and crank up the stoves! It's time to cook some African Style Steak! Cervantes: Dude, that's fucked up. Ulysses: Would you prefer I cooked Osama Bin Ladens home made recipe of Big Apple Crumble? Cervantes: That's even more fucked up. Ulysses:... Well... would you like a plate of raw elk penis to dip in ketchup? Cervantes:...Sometimes, I think you're adopted. *TLR Comes in the front door with a moist body and a towel around his waist* TLR: Alright, I'm ba- Hey! Get away from my computer assholes! Ulysses: Oh shit! *Pulls body out through the computer screen and jumps out the window, the sound of crashing and car alarms apparent* Ulysses: I'm okay! The body cushioned the blow! TLR:... You guys... weren't looking at my porn... were you? Cervantes: Nah, I wouldn't touch that with a twenty foot pole and a bio-hazard hazmat suit. TLR: Good. I see you were keeping Delta occupied while I was crying my brains out. *TLR Shuffles towards the computer and sits down in a chair* TLR: Saw your advertisement on OC's by the way. I'll be sure to ship something in a minute. Ulysses: Bow-Chic-a-wow-wow! Cervantes/TLR: Ulysses, shut the fuck up!
6284014 TLR: Tch, I'm the only one sane here really. Cervantes:... but we're alternate personalities you developed from a lonesome childhood to keep you company, and you just recently started expressing us over the internet. *TLR Speaks through clenched teeth* TLR: Cervantes, shut the fuck uuup!
6284082 *Ulysses climbs back in the room through the window, wiping blood off of his face* Cervantes:... Are you bleeding? Ulysses: Nah, don't worry, it's not mine. And Jacob, don't fret, there's no reason to be upset. Also, should you want to learn a few of my more... favored recipes, please feel free to stop by. I'll show you how to make a damned good hotpocket with that flesh in your fridge.
6284213 Ulysses: Eh, your choice. Cervantes:... I just realized something. Ulysses: What's that? Cervantes: We're all talking... in public... *Ulysses looks at nowhere in particular, but those who read this are unknowingly being watc-whoops!* Ulysses: Speak one word, and I turn your intestines into a kindergarten finger painting. We'll continue this conversation later Delta and Jacob. Until then, toodles!
Yeah I don't ever comment on things but fucking hell m8, shoot an old lady followed by some 1, 2 shankeroo of Big Red. Some extreme approach to 'take no prisoners' while just a few articles of Geneva Convention broken, implying cross-dimensional applications. Just hope the shrekoning/ruckus isn't too bad for some of the others.
This the part where I stop caring because both the protagonist and the setting are completely unsympathetic, the latter doing something idiot villains do.
I know people think rainbow dash is stupid but she is not dumb enough to fight a platoon of armed people or ponies see what this go back and tell the guard.
Oh fuck yes, the rainbowdash part was the fucking best. Ya know its really refreshing to have a fic like this. Cant wait for the next chapter
This chapter is fucking epic.
Always nice to see something that isn't all sunshine and rainbows
6283011 Walmart.
Naw. I googled something... I don't quite remember. I would probably just look up 'video game regeneration'...? But yeah, got it from Walmart.
You killed Big Mac, you bastard!
6283290
You killed Big Mac, you bastard!
6283293 TLR: Damn you to the fiery pits of hell! I hope you get duck-taped to a chair and forced to watch G3.5 My Little Pony! You killed off one of the most masculine characters!
*Curls up in a corner of a shower and starts sobbing as cold water runs over TLR's body*
Ulysses: I think you did smashing! His corpse still happens to be around by any chance, right?
6283295 Aren't I a monster?
6283338 Ulysses: Yes, you're beautiful! And make sure to take a barbed and rusty pole covered in sandpaper and use it as a dildo on your next victim! But seriously, where's the corpse of Big Mac? It's only a matter of time before TLR Gets back out of the shower and gets his act together. I'm willing to pay.
Cervantes: Ulysses, what the hell do you want with an anthropomorphic corpse of Big Macintosh?
Ulysses:... Stuff...
*Ulysses kicks a grimy cardboard box filled with farming tools and all sorts of other bladed equipment underneath the bed*
Ulysses: Just wanted to break in my new toys is all.
Cervantes: Oh for the love of- Don't listen to him. He's a cannibalistic twenty-seven year-old schizophrenic who has a hard on for blades and torture.
Ulysses: Oh thank you for those compliments!
Cervantes: You see that? Right there.
*Facepalms, and sighs heavily*
Cervantes: Fuck this, I'm out.
*Cervantes walks out the door*
Ulysses:... sooo... how much for the corpse now? And would you like that in cash or credit?
6283597 I never stated that dog tags were required as proof of a soldiers death, I merely said that's all that would be left of a man from certain kinds of explosions. That, and enough remaining charred flesh and entrails to fill a 40 oz. Slurpee cup.
6283378 Geez, I thought Jacob was crazy.
Hey, I'm still the most badass motherfucker here!
Sure you are. Anyways you can have the body for free.
6283896 Ulysses: Woohoo! Crack out the frying pans and crank up the stoves! It's time to cook some African Style Steak!
Cervantes: Dude, that's fucked up.
Ulysses: Would you prefer I cooked Osama Bin Ladens home made recipe of Big Apple Crumble?
Cervantes: That's even more fucked up.
Ulysses:... Well... would you like a plate of raw elk penis to dip in ketchup?
Cervantes:...Sometimes, I think you're adopted.
*TLR Comes in the front door with a moist body and a towel around his waist*
TLR: Alright, I'm ba- Hey! Get away from my computer assholes!
Ulysses: Oh shit!
*Pulls body out through the computer screen and jumps out the window, the sound of crashing and car alarms apparent*
Ulysses: I'm okay! The body cushioned the blow!
TLR:... You guys... weren't looking at my porn... were you?
Cervantes: Nah, I wouldn't touch that with a twenty foot pole and a bio-hazard hazmat suit.
TLR: Good. I see you were keeping Delta occupied while I was crying my brains out.
*TLR Shuffles towards the computer and sits down in a chair*
TLR: Saw your advertisement on OC's by the way. I'll be sure to ship something in a minute.
Ulysses: Bow-Chic-a-wow-wow!
Cervantes/TLR: Ulysses, shut the fuck up!
6283968
Interesting group of people. Anyways any OC's will be welcomed.
Seriously, you want a OC from them? They're not right in the head.
Jacob, you keep the flesh of you enemies in the fridge. You even tore Discords throat out with your teeth, so I don't think you can judge anyone.
*Huff* Whatever.
6284014 TLR: Tch, I'm the only one sane here really.
Cervantes:... but we're alternate personalities you developed from a lonesome childhood to keep you company, and you just recently started expressing us over the internet.
*TLR Speaks through clenched teeth*
TLR: Cervantes, shut the fuck uuup!
6284061
See, they're crazy.
Jacob, we're the same way. I made you so you're part of me.
...
*Jacob walks to a table and slams his head onto the surface*
SHIT!!
Idiot.
6284082 *Ulysses climbs back in the room through the window, wiping blood off of his face*
Cervantes:... Are you bleeding?
Ulysses: Nah, don't worry, it's not mine. And Jacob, don't fret, there's no reason to be upset. Also, should you want to learn a few of my more... favored recipes, please feel free to stop by. I'll show you how to make a damned good hotpocket with that flesh in your fridge.
6284200
I rather eat my meat raw, thank you very much.
It's true, he eats that shit raw.
6284213 Ulysses: Eh, your choice.
Cervantes:... I just realized something.
Ulysses: What's that?
Cervantes: We're all talking... in public...
*Ulysses looks at nowhere in particular, but those who read this are unknowingly being watc-whoops!*
Ulysses: Speak one word, and I turn your intestines into a kindergarten finger painting. We'll continue this conversation later Delta and Jacob. Until then, toodles!
Yeah I don't ever comment on things but fucking hell m8, shoot an old lady followed by some 1, 2 shankeroo of Big Red. Some extreme approach to 'take no prisoners' while just a few articles of Geneva Convention broken, implying cross-dimensional applications. Just hope the shrekoning/ruckus isn't too bad for some of the others.
6301708 They have hands.
6301772 can you add a navy seal squad into the story I want to see more earth military personnel in the story
6450548 I think I can make that work, but they may not make an appearance in the story for a while.
He should use explosives on the farm house. The lack of things blowing up is starting to affect my enjoyment.
When is the next chapter coming out?
6810214 It's half way done, but it may still be a while till I update it. Just know it will come out as soon as I can finish it.
F*********************, I WANT TO SEE DESTRUCTION ANNIHILATION BLOOD
6301772 thanks, this will help me on my journey.
7229711 i thought so, but i wanted to be sure
Oh come on man!....
Why'd you kill Granny Smith?.... that's a dick move... *groans* hhhnnggg.....
I love these kinds of stories, but I'm not gonna lie; Big Mac and Granny Smith? A line has been crossed.
Great fic by the way!
This the part where I stop caring because both the protagonist and the setting are completely unsympathetic, the latter doing something idiot villains do.
I know people think rainbow dash is stupid but she is not dumb enough to fight a platoon of armed people or ponies see what this go back and tell the guard.