The Good Brony may have wrecked my compulsive need to be the first commenter two chapters in a row on TLS bastard, but not here! Fulfillment, at last!
Okay, so I said I'd reserve judgment on Mustang until I saw a little more of him, and now I feel a little more comfortable with his character to make an assessment. Medium ham. Not quite Stronghoof obnoxious- which is sort of cheating, if you think about it, because he was ripped straight out of FMA- but still a boisterous jovial character in his own right. I'm getting the sense that he sincerely has no grasp on the concept of subtlety, and his unnatural zeal seems to be his biggest strength as well as his biggest weakness, if his encounter with the ghouls and the plasma caster is any indication. Also wondering what's got him so paranoid about that case Inkwell was interested in. He seemed more embarrassed than angry at the possibility of Inkwell finding out about its contents. Hm...
Crosshair continues to be one of my favorite characters so far. I can't help it; I'm a sucker for snarky pessimists, and Crosshair fits that role quite nicely. More, I say! More snark!
Inkwell seems to fit the role of a Ranger like he was born for it. You've got him constantly fawning all over technology to the point of being considerably upset at the destruction of a mere ammunition cache. Yet, he's not a complete douche canoe like the majority of Rangers. Inexperienced sure, but not yet hardened by the Wasteland into a jaded asshole who judges everyone based on preconceived notions. His overreactions in certain situations also have a unique charm about them; for example, when he was grabbed by the head and hefted up off his hooves, or when Mustang and Crosshair landed on him one after the other. It gives me a chuckle not unlike some of Frosty's reactions in Memories.
There was a little more character interaction than world building this chapter, but what I did learn was interesting. This joint project between T.I.T. and Stable-Tec has piqued my curiosity, and I'm wondering what sort of things a stable manufactured in a joint effort between these two can cook up. Also, the Snow Pirates, who seem to be a major faction in Wintertrot, if the way Crosshair talks about them is anything to go by. The way Crosshair talked about them made it seem like it was less lingering zebra hate from the war, and more like he himself had a bit of history with the Snow Pirates. If so, I'm curious to see what exactly he could've done to cause such friction between himself and a whole faction.
So, cheers for finally getting chapter 4 back up! Hopefully, since you say you've gotten started already, 5 won't take as long. :3
2698678 Sorry for the late reply Tofu, I've been pre-occupied.
Thanks for reserving judgement on Mustang. He's an incredibly fun character to write, though keeping his dialogue in character is always a bit of a challenge. Mustang was partially inspired by Alex Louis Armstrong from FMA, but only partially, if only I could tell you the full weight of what I'm saying or have planned for Mustang. Alas, that would be major, MAJOR! spoiler territory.
Glad you still like Crosshair, I have fun writing him as well. Everyone loves cynical/pessimistic characters.
Glad you like what I have done with Inkwell, I have been wanting to show how much Inkwell loves technology for awhile. I have been working to expand on him and continue to give him his own charm.
Thanks, glad you like how I am expanding the world and expanding on the characters. Whilst also leaving you with more questions to ponder over. Chapter 5 is about a third or a quarter of the way finished. So hopefully I can get it out this month.
2701521 Heh, glad you like my small reference. As for exactly when this story begins, I'll reveal that in good time.
‘Celestia defends, Luna protects’. I am not sure if this is supposed to be a project horizons reference but if it is then you got it backwards it is supposed to be ‘Celestia protects, Luna defends’.
Just wanted to point that out :) living this series so far
‘Celestia defends, Luna protects’. I am not sure if this is supposed to be a project horizons reference but if it is then you got it backwards it is supposed to be ‘Celestia protects, Luna defends’.
Just wanted to point that out :) loving this series so far
Hmmm, this story is fascinating. It has a very interesting premise and has very interesting characters however I do have a few problems with it.
1. I feel like this whole story has been one long sprint thus far. Inkwell hardly does anything but shoot, heal up, shoot, talk, shoot...... I'd like the guns blazing to at least calm a bit.
2. I'd like to have had a bit more content before he went out and found Cross. I question the validity that the entire crew were still in the meeting area since they were at very least pseudo-soldiers and shouldn't of just panicked, and seeing as it took awhile for them to crash some should of escaped. Bodies should of been spread a tad more over the crash site. He never really searched nearby for wounded Rangers , It almost seemed shallow of him to first go to the armory, and not try to help his fallen brethren. After the crash and said needed search, thus his realization he may be the last Ranger left; I would have enjoyed him trying to figure out his next course of action more thoroughly; then come to the conclusion that he feels the need to accomplish the mission regardless. From there he should of tried to figure out how to do it, he'd need a base of operations, a way to get in contact with the nearest Ranger outpost, would it be ok under these circumstances to make non-Ranger blood welcome to his group. Inkwell needs to be a tad more meticulous with his planning, I say this based on the fact he's the Rangers' accountant/ deal getter thus I'd assume he'd have to be somewhat organized. I have no problems with him being unknowing of the conditions or location, but he shouldn't be practically incompetent when it comes to things basic training should of covered. I don't mind him being jumpy, just he seems almost incompetent at tactics.
...I'm really having trouble figuring out if Inkwell is brave or cowardly. He has moments that shows great inner courage, theeen he frequently has moments where he's panicking like a little foal. Is he just high-strung? This enigma puzzles me.
The Good Brony may have wrecked my compulsive need to be the first commenter two chapters in a row on TLS bastard, but not here! Fulfillment, at last!
Okay, so I said I'd reserve judgment on Mustang until I saw a little more of him, and now I feel a little more comfortable with his character to make an assessment. Medium ham. Not quite Stronghoof obnoxious- which is sort of cheating, if you think about it, because he was ripped straight out of FMA- but still a boisterous jovial character in his own right. I'm getting the sense that he sincerely has no grasp on the concept of subtlety, and his unnatural zeal seems to be his biggest strength as well as his biggest weakness, if his encounter with the ghouls and the plasma caster is any indication. Also wondering what's got him so paranoid about that case Inkwell was interested in. He seemed more embarrassed than angry at the possibility of Inkwell finding out about its contents. Hm...
Crosshair continues to be one of my favorite characters so far. I can't help it; I'm a sucker for snarky pessimists, and Crosshair fits that role quite nicely. More, I say! More snark!
Inkwell seems to fit the role of a Ranger like he was born for it. You've got him constantly fawning all over technology to the point of being considerably upset at the destruction of a mere ammunition cache. Yet, he's not a complete douche canoe like the majority of Rangers. Inexperienced sure, but not yet hardened by the Wasteland into a jaded asshole who judges everyone based on preconceived notions. His overreactions in certain situations also have a unique charm about them; for example, when he was grabbed by the head and hefted up off his hooves, or when Mustang and Crosshair landed on him one after the other. It gives me a chuckle not unlike some of Frosty's reactions in Memories.
There was a little more character interaction than world building this chapter, but what I did learn was interesting. This joint project between T.I.T. and Stable-Tec has piqued my curiosity, and I'm wondering what sort of things a stable manufactured in a joint effort between these two can cook up. Also, the Snow Pirates, who seem to be a major faction in Wintertrot, if the way Crosshair talks about them is anything to go by. The way Crosshair talked about them made it seem like it was less lingering zebra hate from the war, and more like he himself had a bit of history with the Snow Pirates. If so, I'm curious to see what exactly he could've done to cause such friction between himself and a whole faction.
So, cheers for finally getting chapter 4 back up! Hopefully, since you say you've gotten started already, 5 won't take as long. :3
Omg! Frost! I love it when stories interact with other stories. What time does this story take place? And great chapter. Been waitin' for this.
2698678
Sorry for the late reply Tofu, I've been pre-occupied.
Thanks for reserving judgement on Mustang. He's an incredibly fun character to write, though keeping his dialogue in character is always a bit of a challenge. Mustang was partially inspired by Alex Louis Armstrong from FMA, but only partially, if only I could tell you the full weight of what I'm saying or have planned for Mustang. Alas, that would be major, MAJOR! spoiler territory.
Glad you still like Crosshair, I have fun writing him as well. Everyone loves cynical/pessimistic characters.
Glad you like what I have done with Inkwell, I have been wanting to show how much Inkwell loves technology for awhile. I have been working to expand on him and continue to give him his own charm.
Thanks, glad you like how I am expanding the world and expanding on the characters. Whilst also leaving you with more questions to ponder over. Chapter 5 is about a third or a quarter of the way finished. So hopefully I can get it out this month.
2701521
Heh, glad you like my small reference. As for exactly when this story begins, I'll reveal that in good time.
2735599 Glad you liked it.
2741250 No I mean the "let's type stuff and work on it later" in the middle of a creepy surgery scene that apparently gets no further mention.
2741257...Dammit. Dunno how we missed that. Or why nobody thought to mention it. *Facehoof* Fixed now, thanks for letting me know.
Much better.
DAKKA!
fc09.deviantart.net/fs43/f/2009/101/b/a/Dakka_by_LostSamurai.jpg
‘Celestia defends, Luna protects’. I am not sure if this is supposed to be a project horizons reference but if it is then you got it backwards it is supposed to be ‘Celestia protects, Luna defends’.
Just wanted to point that out :) living this series so far
‘Celestia defends, Luna protects’. I am not sure if this is supposed to be a project horizons reference but if it is then you got it backwards it is supposed to be ‘Celestia protects, Luna defends’.
Just wanted to point that out :) loving this series so far
3845360 It's a reference to The Last Sentinel, go read that Fallout: Equestria story, it's way longer than mine right now and you'll really enjoy it.
Hmmm, this story is fascinating. It has a very interesting premise and has very interesting characters however I do have a few problems with it.
1. I feel like this whole story has been one long sprint thus far. Inkwell hardly does anything but shoot, heal up, shoot, talk, shoot...... I'd like the guns blazing to at least calm a bit.
2. I'd like to have had a bit more content before he went out and found Cross. I question the validity that the entire crew were still in the meeting area since they were at very least pseudo-soldiers and shouldn't of just panicked, and seeing as it took awhile for them to crash some should of escaped. Bodies should of been spread a tad more over the crash site. He never really searched nearby for wounded Rangers , It almost seemed shallow of him to first go to the armory, and not try to help his fallen brethren. After the crash and said needed search, thus his realization he may be the last Ranger left; I would have enjoyed him trying to figure out his next course of action more thoroughly; then come to the conclusion that he feels the need to accomplish the mission regardless. From there he should of tried to figure out how to do it, he'd need a base of operations, a way to get in contact with the nearest Ranger outpost, would it be ok under these circumstances to make non-Ranger blood welcome to his group. Inkwell needs to be a tad more meticulous with his planning, I say this based on the fact he's the Rangers' accountant/ deal getter thus I'd assume he'd have to be somewhat organized. I have no problems with him being unknowing of the conditions or location, but he shouldn't be practically incompetent when it comes to things basic training should of covered. I don't mind him being jumpy, just he seems almost incompetent at tactics.
Sorry for the wall of text.
That is an interesting phrase Inkpot uses. Cocknoodles. Wait that's an actual word?good god.
ORK BOYZ WANT MORE DAKKA!
...I'm really having trouble figuring out if Inkwell is brave or cowardly. He has moments that shows great inner courage, theeen he frequently has moments where he's panicking like a little foal. Is he just high-strung? This enigma puzzles me.