A Captain of the United Gilbret Federation is stuck in world where is Ponies are the master and humans are nothing but savage and tamed animals. Well not if this Captain has something to say about it.
My grammer detectors have become overloaded with so many mistakes they make congress look like a paradise. Find an editor or pick up an english book and get to reading. Other than that, the sfory is good. Keep on keepin on.
If I may, can I suggest giving the humans a BMP-3 or some other vehicle that they can use to rapid-deploy with, while kicking ass and taking names with the amphibious transport's 30-mm autocannon, a 100-mm rifled cannon capable of firing both standard cannon shells and Anti-Tank Guided Missiles (ATGMs), three separate 7.62-mm machine guns (two in bow, one mounted at co-axial); along with being able to fire on the move just as accurately as while stopped, being able to self-entrenfh itself in soft ground, fire off 81-mm smoke grenades or inject fuel into the exhaust system to make a smokescreen, automated fire extinguishers, firing ports for five of the seven possible passengers (minus the three crew members; the last two passengers would mount the two bow-mounted 7.62s), and a host of other useful features....
Honestly, I had no hope for this at the beginning. The only reason I followed it was that it had an interesting concept. Now I can say that I am actually interested in what will happen next. Just a word of advice though, fix and fine tune the earlier chapters so more people will want to continue reading instead of stopping.
4530544 I absolutely support the idea of a BMP-3 for support. Hell its gotta be the best IFV in existence, or at least my favorite. Its sure to put the fear of God in ponies minds when they see that big bitch driving into town. that things amphibious so they couldn't even drown them easily and the fire extinguishing system would make fire unuseable.
The strike team in the could have scared the populous more if they decided to inform the citizens of Equestria like Commissar Markhov in the Soviet 3rd Shock Army did with the civilians of Berlin during the Ring of Steel mission just with some editing Original "Citizens of Berlin! A ring of steel surrounds your rotten city! We will crush all who still dare to resist the will of the Red Army! Abandon your posts, abandon your homes, abandon all hope! Ura!" Updated for the situation "Ponies of Equestria! A ring of steel surrounds your rotten state! We will crush all who still dare to resist the will of Humanity! Abandon your posts, abandon your homes, abandon all hope! Ura!"
You should also have them say to free the human slaves and to bring forward any slave sellers slave trade leaders and charge high level ponies for their crimes
And sorry im con first if eso and im a spanish voy that i also has work to do and im getting bulied by an asshole, un reality i speak spanish not english
As this was happening Spectre was on the roof along with J shooting at the pegasus guards that's trying to give support to the unicorns and earth ponies their armor was completely useless to the 8.45mm bullets from the M8A1 and the 50 caliber from the Barret.
these chapters so far are in a desperate need of a rewrite so many spelling errors and misused terms such as you're using Clip all of the time when it should be Magazine, A clip is a piece of metal that holds bullets and allows them to be loaded into certain rifles such as the Mosin Nagant.
I kinda got off on a tangent there sorry but all i'm saying is that these chapters need a rewrite badly.
Yay terrorism and mercy killing
dud read this wal lisanig ato i astand alone
it has only just began
welcome to hell you fucks
My grammer detectors have become overloaded with so many mistakes they make congress look like a paradise. Find an editor or pick up an english book and get to reading. Other than that, the sfory is good. Keep on keepin on.
Kill them all OP! KILL ALL OF THE SLAVERS!
RETRIBUTION!!!!!!!!!!
Bro not to hate or anything buts it's called a drum mag not a round mag
If I may, can I suggest giving the humans a BMP-3 or some other vehicle that they can use to rapid-deploy with, while kicking ass and taking names with the amphibious transport's 30-mm autocannon, a 100-mm rifled cannon capable of firing both standard cannon shells and Anti-Tank Guided Missiles (ATGMs), three separate 7.62-mm machine guns (two in bow, one mounted at co-axial); along with being able to fire on the move just as accurately as while stopped, being able to self-entrenfh itself in soft ground, fire off 81-mm smoke grenades or inject fuel into the exhaust system to make a smokescreen, automated fire extinguishers, firing ports for five of the seven possible passengers (minus the three crew members; the last two passengers would mount the two bow-mounted 7.62s), and a host of other useful features....
My new favorite story!
4530544
This is 30 years in the future so I'm gonna need your help to modify the weapons and name
4530149
Whoops
Honestly, I had no hope for this at the beginning. The only reason I followed it was that it had an interesting concept. Now I can say that I am actually interested in what will happen next. Just a word of advice though, fix and fine tune the earlier chapters so more people will want to continue reading instead of stopping.
4573862
Honestly I really enjoy writing this.
But since English is my third language I'm still learning.
I need a editor but since thread notification is offline editor won't find out.
4530544 I absolutely support the idea of a BMP-3 for support. Hell its gotta be the best IFV in existence, or at least my favorite. Its sure to put the fear of God in ponies minds when they see that big bitch driving into town. that things amphibious so they couldn't even drown them easily and the fire extinguishing system would make fire unuseable.
Wow great Story so far, I like it how the ponies will soon learn why not to enslave humans, great chapters so far. Please continue
VI LA REVOLUTIONION
The strike team in the could have scared the populous more if they decided to inform the citizens of Equestria like Commissar Markhov in the Soviet 3rd Shock Army did with the civilians of Berlin during the Ring of Steel mission just with some editing
Original
"Citizens of Berlin! A ring of steel surrounds your rotten city! We will crush all who still dare to resist the will of the Red Army! Abandon your posts, abandon your homes, abandon all hope! Ura!"
Updated for the situation
"Ponies of Equestria! A ring of steel surrounds your rotten state! We will crush all who still dare to resist the will of Humanity! Abandon your posts, abandon your homes, abandon all hope! Ura!"
On another note, if you want futuristic weapons for the strike teams and armies later invading Equis here are some pics that should help:
wallpaperhi.com/thumbnails/detail/20120723/soldiers%20war%20army%20futuristic%20goggles%20concept%20art%20marek%20okon%201920x1200%20wallpaper_www.wallpaperhi.com_99.jpg
Artist: Marek Okon
cdn.whatanart.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/futuristic-navy-warships-military-concept-ship.jpg
Artist: Jaime Jasso
As for the vehicles:
digital-art-gallery.com/oid/72/640x814_12914_VANEVIR_interior_backView_2d_automotive_military_truck_futuristic_picture_image_digital_art.jpg
creativecrash.com/system/photos/000/223/760/223760/big/Type_61_main_battle_tank_06.jpg?1340036983
4714976
I am going to do a seen similar to that. With the COD WWW scene but a bit more drastic.
The eye googles are already on Spectre and OP Eyes.
Those other vehicles they will have a spot light (hint hint)
4718130
i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/4280390144/h832755CF/
4714976
4718130
You should also have them say to free the human slaves and to bring forward any slave sellers slave trade leaders and charge high level ponies for their crimes
4797121
All will come soon
4797235
To quote a handsome devil who is in the military
"VIA LA REVOLUTION"
If this story involves cappin' bitches, I'm in!
Fuck yeah! I have been waiting for a story like this for some time now.
is dis dead
4890069
If u see this comment that means I'm not dead.
Yes it's still alive it's just in a coma
4893025 oh thank god, I thought a guy in a baking and monkey mask ate you with a rusty sporl. Thank god I'm wrong.
so when is the next chapter coming out
4959958
When I have time from school.
Next week maybe.
Im getting tired
5073841
Of what waiting because I'm trying to balance writing,śchool and jobs
5073841
You know what there will be a chapter before October 5
That's a promise
Thanks:)
Gracias :)
And sorry im con first if eso and im a spanish voy that i also has work to do and im getting bulied by an asshole, un reality i speak spanish not english
You pinkie promised there would be a new chapter un TVE 5th and bits now the eight
5114466
I know I'm sorry.
I'm thinking of another human that's going to arrive in Equestria but at the side if the ponies. Possibly a merc or a traitor to the Gilbret empire.
Rather than that I think it's almost ready.
Whats TVE story called
Dont worry bro i forgive you, by the way whats the story called
you know in retro spec if they treated humans better none of this would of happen
ANNIHILATION
you didn't from the start😈😈😈
Alternative: 12.7mm.
these chapters so far are in a desperate need of a rewrite so many spelling errors and misused terms such as you're using Clip all of the time when it should be Magazine, A clip is a piece of metal that holds bullets and allows them to be loaded into certain rifles such as the Mosin Nagant.
I kinda got off on a tangent there sorry but all i'm saying is that these chapters need a rewrite badly.