This Strange World
Twilight and Spike are walking among the hallways. Twilight still doesn’t have a good gist of how this strange new world works, but she figured it out soon enough.
Suddenly she hears a voice.
“I’m really sorry… I just found it, and thought I should give it to her…”
Peeking through the corner, she sees two girls having a conversation. One of them has light pink hair, the other has red and yellow hair. Twilight can’t shake the feeling she recognizes them.
“I didn’t know you had dropped it.”
“Well I did, and I was about to get it before you swooped in and ruined everything. You shouldn’t pick up things that don’t belong to you.”
“It… doesn’t really belong to you either…”
“Excuse me?!”
“N-n-nothing…”
“That’s what I thought. It’s as good as mine and you know it! You really are pathetic! It’s no wonder all your friends are stray animals!”
Twilight can’t stand this situation. The other girl was bullying her! Twilight has had experience with bullies--mainly Babs Seed, from what Applejack told her--and one thing was certain, she would not stand down and just watch.
“How dare you speak to her that way?” she says, stepping forward.
The orange-haired girl realizes Twilight and turns around. “What did you say?”
“I said, how dare you speak to her that way?”
The two look at each other. One look at Twilight was all the other girl needed to know everything. She smiles. “You must be new here… or else you would realize just who I am.”
“I don't care who you are, nothing gives you the right to be such a jerk!”
"What did you call me?!"
"You heard me, I called you a jerk! If you don't like it, you can just get lost!"
"Oh, you're going to regret this, fresh meat!"
She then walks away angrily.
“I can’t believe you did that,” the pink-haired girl speaks up.
“I couldn’t just stand there!” says Twilight.
“But no one stands up to Sunset Shimmer!”
“Sunset Shimmer…?” Twilight turns around, seeing Sunset walk away.
“You’ve heard of her?”
“Sort of…”
“I don’t think I’ve seen you around before. Did you just transfer to Canterlot High from another school?”
“Um…” Twilight quickly tries to find an excuse. “Yes! Another… school! My name’s Twilight.”
“I’m… Fluttershy…” the other girl responds in a whisper.
“Sorry, what was that?”
“Um… it’s Fluttershy…”
“Sounds like you’re saying Fluttershy, but... how can that…”
Fluttershy then notices Spike. “Oh my goodness!” She then runs straight towards him, knocking down Twilight. “Who’s this sweet little guy?”
“That’s Spike. My… um… dog.”
“He is so cute!” Fluttershy then goes to her backpack and pulls out a dog biscuit. “Go on, eat up, little pup!”
Spike looks at it and starts to slowly eat it, satisfied with its flavour.
“Wouldn’t you just give anything to know what they were really thinking?”
“He usually just tells me.”
“What do you mean?” Whoops. Now ya done it, Twilight.
Spike, covered in drool, proceeds to bark, to avoid blowing the two’s cover.
“Oh… nothing, never mind.” Time to change the subject. “Sunset Shimmer said you picked something up. Something that belonged to her. It… wasn’t a crown, was it?”
“How did you know?”
“Uh… lucky guess?” Pause. “Do you still have it?”
“No.” Did you really expect it to be that simple, Twilight?
“But you know what happened to it?”
“Yes… this morning, I was passing out flyers for the animal shelter, like I do every Wednesday. When I realized that nobody was taking the flyers, I sat on the ground feeling sad. Just then, the crown hit my head. I had no idea how it got there, but I didn’t want anything to happen to it, so I decided to give it to Principal Celestia.”
“Principal Celestia? She’s the ruler here?”
“You… could say that. Technically, I guess she and Vice-Principal Luna do make the rules.”
“Where is she now?”
“Probably in her office.”
As Twilight turns around and starts to run to Principal Celestia’s office, a soccer ball rolls over in the area. Twilight doesn’t realize it--she’s just getting used to being biped, you see--and trips on it with her feet and falls down. Fluttershy realizes this and catches her.
The ball rolls over to another girl, who proceeds to pick it up. "Oops, sorry about that. Are you OK?"
The rainbow-coloured hair was all Twilight needed to recognize the girl. "Rainbow Dash?"
"Oh, so you've heard of me, huh? Well, I can't say I blame ya. After all, I'm only like the greatest athlete in all of Canterlot High. I captain like every sports team they have, so I need to keep in top form and practice my moves all the time. I guess my ball slipped away from me though. So anyways, who's your new friend Fluttershy?"
“I’m Twilight Sparkle,” Twilight introduces herself.
"Nice to meet you Twilight Sparkle,” Rainbow says as she grabs Twilight’s hand and helps her get up. “I know we never met, but Fluttershy and I go way back, so if you’re friends with her, then you're a friend of mine."
"Um, well I don't know if we're Friend-Friends,” Fluttershy speaks up, “but just a moment ago she stood up to Sunset Shimmer for me."
Once she hears this, Rainbow drops her ball in shock and opens her mouth also in shock. "No way... You stood up to Sunset Shimmer? You?"
"Um… yes?"
Rainbow then wraps her arm around Twilight's neck and turn-rubs her fist into Twilight's side while saying "Man, you are one gutsy girl!” Letting go of her and gently slapping her on the back, she says “I like you already, Twilight Sparkle. Can't wait to hang out with you some more!"
Kicking the ball back into her arms Rainbow walks away while saying "Well I gotta get movin', catch ya girls later!”
Twilight then realized what she was going to do too. She quickly started to run towards Principal Celestia’s office. Once she is gone she realizes she doesn’t know where to go. She returns to Fluttershy asking for directions.
“Third door on your left.”
“Thank you!”
Once the two were nearly out of sight, Fluttershy calls for Twilight.
“Wait! You’re… not really supposed to have pets on school grounds,” she says pointing at Spike. “You might wanna tuck ‘em into your backpack. That’s what I do.”
“Oh… okay! Thank you!”
A knock on the door in Principal Celestia’s office is heard.
“Come in.”
Twilight then proceeds to open the door. With her head.
“How may I help you?” asks Celestia.
Twilight then places her backpack on the ground and struggles for a response.
Principal Celestia realizes she is not getting a response and stares at Twilight with an unamused look on her face. She then notices Twilight’s appearance.
“Wait… you’re Twilight Sparkle, aren’t you?”
“Yes!” Twilight blurts out. “How do you know my name?”
“I just got your file the other day. You’re the new transfer student who recently moved here from Everfree High in Manhattan. You’re scheduled to start attending here today."
"I am...? I mean… yes, I am! Now, the reason I’m here is that… I was told that Fluttershy found a crown and gave it to you."
“Yes. I had Vice-Principal Luna put it somewhere for safe keeping. No idea how it ended up on the front lawn. Were you interested of running for Princess of the Fall Formal this year?”
“Uh… no. Not exactly. The truth is… well the truth is I… you see… the crown is actually...” Twilight then realizes what Principal Celestia just mentioned. “Princess of the Fall Formal?”
“It’s Canterlot High’s big Fall dance.”
“Like the Grand Galloping Gala!”
“The Grand Galloping Gala…?”
“Oh… uh… it was a... big deal at my old school.” Real smooth, Twilight. Real smooth.
“And was there a princess?”
“Yes, but she wasn’t exactly a student.”
Twilight stares at the wall on the other side, near Principal Celestia, where she sees photos of Sunset Shimmer with a crown and apparently being the Princess of the Fall Formal every single year.
“Here at Canterlot High the students select one of their peers to represent them. She receives her crown at the Fall Formal.”
Twilight puts on a thinking face. As she exits the room she speaks up.
“You asked me if I was interested in running for princess. Can anyone run?”
“Yes. You just need to let the head of the Fall Formal planning committee know you’d like to be on the ballot. Was there anything else?”
“Uh… no. That was it!”
“Well, if you do need anything else, my door’s always open.” And with that, Principal Celestia closed the door.
As Twilight exits the office, she pulls out Spike from her backpack.
“Why didn’t you just tell her the crown was yours and ask for it back?” he asks.
“Well, I was going to… but imagine if one of them showed up in Equestria saying they came from a place with tall, fleshy two-legged creatures with these! They’d think they were crazy!” Actually… that’s not that far from the truth, Twilight.
“You make a good point. What was with that whole thing about you being a transfer student, though?”
“I have no idea. But I can use that as a fake identity if anyone is suspicious.”
“Makes sense.”
“Looks like if I want my crown back, I’m gonna have to become princess of the Canterlot High Fall Formal. So that’s what I’m gonna do!”
“And how exactly do you plan on doing that?”
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Well nice job with this chapter, I was just expecting a little talk what is happening in pony world. Best of luck with the next chapter.
3859046 That's in the next chapter.
Well, you sure are following the story of EQG right, and even some aspect of the switch is very much noticeable.
I'm sorry, but even if you change up the dialogue, most of these scenes are narratively pointless unless the reader hasn't seen the Equestria Girls movie. You should focus more on events not seen in the film, or that are significantly altered from the film. For example, Twilight's meeting Rainbow early here, which is important. But the scene with Celestia isn't apparently important at all because it's not changed enough.
congratulation. this sucks.
3865966 I said I wanted constructive criticism, but not that. At least tell me what I can do to make it better.
3869297
How about not just reenact/retell events from the freaking movie?
You want to do a switch a ro story with the human Twilight and her dog (now turned drgaon) Spike running around in Equestria? Then focus on that damn it. Don't focuss on the story of a movie we already know, focus on what may have happened in the pony world outside of Twilight's experience. You know, create something similiar to the episode where Spike took care of the pets, which happened simultaneously to the Crystal Empire qualification. Instead we get that. You know what retelling stuff people can see in other shows is? Unimaginative garbage. And the fact you are not able to realize that makes it clear you have not much writing experience in general.