• Published 18th May 2014
  • 1,482 Views, 29 Comments

Apples, Tanks, N' Badflanks - ultra1437



Celestia and Luna go on an unexpected adventure after a drinking contest gone awry. Let’s follow them, and see what kind of trouble and adventure our drunken princesses can manage to find!

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Equestrian Intermissions 3 - We're getting crowded in here, aren't we?

The Elements of Harmony and their bearers were gathered again in Twilight’s library. “Discord? Why did you help me that readily? It’s not like you…” Twilight’s mind kicked into overdrive as Discord’s smile faded. ‘The princesses go missing, and AJ turns up with Discord offering to help look for them the next morning. He never really acted like he enjoyed anypony’s presence, other than Fluttershy. Did he finally make friends with them or something, only for something to happen?

Rarity’s mind had followed like Twilight’s, and she found herself looking at Discord in a new light, but the pony next to her, Rainbow was about ready to pulverize him. Her mind had already taken her to Applejack’s original thought of Discord sending them away so he could take over.

He opened his mouth, ready to launch into last night’s events. Twilight beat him to the punch. “Before you explain anything, Discord. I’m not going to put up with any of your tricks. With the princesses gone, I’m Equestria’s de facto leader, and I’m not in the mood.”

Discord nodded before he started, “I was bored yesterday morning and–” Twilight’s look hardened, and he changed his story slightly. “Long story short, the princesses and I had a contest. Applejack was the referee, and when it was over it was a draw. We were tired and I offered to teleport both of them to Celestia’s room before going to bed myself. They accepted and I cast a teleportation spell. I had assumed from the contest that my magic had been inhibited, like their magic was. I found out that they were missing, when Applejack—” the mare waved sheepishly “—woke me up this morning, demanding to know what I did to them.” Applejack looked away, embarrassed. “She even had a dozen solar and lunar guards ready to try and contain me.” Fluttershy squeaked at Twilight’s glare intensified again, but otherwise kept silent through his tale.

Applejack defended herself as she added to his story, “They weren’t in either of their rooms, and Celestia didn’t raise the sun this morning.”

“After her rude awakening, I checked on the equipment we used for the contest we had last night, and it turns out there was no magic inhibition at all on it. I assumed my magic was inhibited, so I charged up far more power than I felt. Truthfully, they could be anywhere in the universe right now.” Applejack shot Discord a warning glare, but relaxed when she noticed Twilight’s mane started frazzling during the story.

Noticing her increasingly distressed state, he paced the room as he ploughed on. “I can find them, but it will take time. I need your help, Twilight Sparkle. If you can keep Equestria running as close to normal as you can, I can bring your princesses back. After that, I’ll submit to any punishment all eight of you can agree to.”

Twilight looked to her friends for their opinions. Applejack nodded wholeheartedly, while Dash shook her head. “I still don’t trust him. He messed with our heads when he originally broke out, how do we know he’s not doing that right now?” Fluttershy looked devastated at Dash’s words.

“Well, if you’re questioning it, wouldn’t that mean that he’s not? Besides, didn’t you originally distrust Twilight when you first met her?” Rarity rebuked. Dash backed down, her ears folding against her skull submissively. ‘Maybe she has learned to pick her battles after all.’ Fluttershy nodded tentatively.

Pinkie nodded. “Only if we can throw them a welcome home party.”

Her friends had spoken their piece and Twilight sighed. “Alright. We’ll help, Discord. But if you try anything…” She let the threat linger.

He looked into her eyes as he responded, “I swear, I will do everything in my power to help you, your friends, and retrieve the princesses.”

“Pinkie Pie Promise?” Dash inquired.

“If I must.” Dash nodded. “Alright. Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.” Discord mimed the motions during the promise.

“Alright, but I’ve still got my eye on you.” Rainbow hardened her glare for a second before relaxing.

“That’s enough, Rainbow. Let’s get to Canterlot and try to restore order, girls.” Rainbow took to the air and flew out the front door, anxious to get this all over with.

Author's Note:

Yes. I will horribly rhyme these if I damn well please. Also, I reserve the right to not rhyme them, too.