“Er,” I used a hoof to brush my mane out of my face as I flew above the vast American expanse.
“Something wrong?” Dash asked as she flew beside me.
“This stupid mane keeps getting in my face!” I’d thought flight would be at least one advantage of being a pegasus, but my now-long mane had ruined that enjoyment. Every time I even felt a brief hint of excitement while flying, my mane flew right into my face and temporarily blinded me. “How do mares deal with this?!”
“You just gotta let it flow behind you.”
“But... that’s so girly! For god’s sakes, it’a so girly it’s a cliche!”
“Look, I know the whole being a pony thing is weird, but it beats the end of the world right?”
“Ok Dash,” I’d been dealing with this problem since that horrible Sunday when all hell had broken loose, “allow me to retort. I can deal with being a pony, hell, I can even deal without hands. What I can’t deal with is being a damn girl!”
“Hey! What’s wrong with being a girl?” Dash stopped flying and got right in my face.
“N-n-nothing, it’s not being a girl that sucks, it’s that I lost my masculinity.”
“Please,” Dash waved a hoof in my direction, “I’ve known lots of stallions who were way more fru-fru than any mare could ever be. Besides, Celestia still needed to work out some bugs with the potion on the seeds, it was the only way.”
I sighed again, “I know, it’s for the good of everypony else. But I mean, the way my friends looked at me after they took the potion... Nate nearly bucking kissed me!”
“Yeah, um, sorry about, I guess the whole heat thing was a bad side effect.”
“No crap,” I pouted.
“Well I think you’re doing pretty well as a mare. You’d probably give Rarity a run for her money in a dress.”
My eyes went wide with suspicion, “Did... did you just call me cute?”
“Well, I mean, um,” Dash’s blue face turned dark red, “maybe.”
“No,” I wildly gesticulated my hooves.“No, no, no! Where’s Discord? Clearly he or some other sick entity has contrived this just to see me squirm.” Damn it! I’m a guy, a former human! I am not in love with Dash! No matter how cute her mane lo- STOP IT! STOP IT BRAIN!!
“Well excuse me for saying you look good.”
“No, I think you’re a nice pony too, it’s just this is too weird for me! I mean, pony, pegasus and a mare, a mare in heat! It’s just...” I bit my lip, “just too much.”
“Hey,” Dash flew closer and patted me with a feather, “we all have our tough days, but that’s what friends are for.” Dash was getting closer.
“I know. Thanks Dash.”
“So you really think I’m a nice pony?”
“Well,” I blushed a little, “maybe a bit more than that.”
“Really?” Dash leaned closer as I closed my eyes.
~~~
I sat up in a flash. It took me a second to remember that I was in a White House bedroom. “Ugh, fricking dreams, they just keep getting weirder and weirder." I was about to fall back to sleep, but I noticed my wings were fully extended. “For buck’s sake.”
___________________________
Author's note: I'm sorry I couldn't resist. Happy April Fools Day Everypony!
FIRST!
Another dream, really? Quit screwing around or I'll have him come after you.
androidguide.ru/img/08/085/AA_12_Fully_Automatic_Shotgun_.jpg
396102 No I want this kinda crap to happen so put the AA-12s away.
396102 bitch please.
eyeonasia.files.wordpress.com/2011/04/play-arts-adam-jensen.jpg?w=796
This guy is knocking down FMP's doors and shooting his grandma.
(counter--ed much?)
troll.me/images/conspiracy-keanu/what-if-my-brain-is-trolling-my-dreams-and-always-starts-dreaming-about-sex-just-before-the-alarm-rings-thumb.jpg
This is what he's thinking ^^
399954 Alright.
i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu261/VileCanti/SMDC2K_by_surfeit.jpg
399967
Fricking pony dreams
399968
Edit: and then I realized that's super mecha death Christ (all of my whats)
399954>>396102
You people are silly
399976 there is a reason why I have a likeness to pinkie pie
AND TWILIGHT LOL
img.ponibooru.org/_images/5b93e87b91cb8c51ac0c86dc8eeada8e/91877%20-%20artist%3Aa01421%20smile%20twilight_sparkle%20vector.png
The dream thing was a thing I found whilst trying to grab a pic of a guy saying: WTF IS WITH MY DREAMS?
"Author's note: I'm sorry I couldn't resist." You shouldn't resist these impulses. They're funny, entertaining, and creative!
I unofficially dub this alternate continuity the Cherryverse.
TL;DR AT BOTTOM. RANT INCOMING.
This is the first Conversion Bureau fic I've read, mainly because the description didn't set my teeth on edge. The whole idea of the CB jives in just exactly the wrong way for me, personally, pushing all the wrong buttons. But this is good, real good. Some people are excited, some go nuts for or against it, som dread it like the plauge and most just want to live.
I always get a vibe from CB fic descriptions, an unspoken 'truth', like "Being human is bad. Being a pony is better. Everyone wants to be a pony. You want to be a pony. Your friends are happy. Your friends are ponies. You want to be happy. Your parents love you. Your parents are ponies. You love your parents. Everypony is happy. Everypony loves you. Everypony is a pony. You love everypony. You are happy. You are a pony." That might be overdoing it a bit, or maybe a lot, but it really creeps me out a lot of the time.
I don't mind the whole "humans are bastards who burn their bridges from both ends" thing CB's got going. The 'verse just creeps me the hell out sometimes. Don't like the whole "Equestria and Earth have been in peaceful contact for a long while and populations are intermingled with no riots or race/species wars." Just don't buy that cohabitation has been that peaceful. I haven't read the stories, so I might just be talking out of my ass about that particular point.
/end rant
Sorry about that, didn't intend to soapbox or rant, but it just turned out that way.
TL;DR: Dislike Conversion Bureau, like this story.
415928
Ah yes the russian roulette that is TCB. I agree with you the misanthropic feel of some of the stories really does leave a bad taste in your mouth (and probably triggers Captain Planet flashbacks ).
However, I think some fics have been able to pull it off namely Chatoyance's stories and Krass's since they primarily focus on the emotions people feel as they become ponies, rather than the state of the world. If the world's apocalyptic state is brought up (Last harvest and stuff like that) it's only to set the stage rather than be the focus. I feel that's the correct path to go down. Plot shouldn't dictate characters, characters should dictate the plot.
Also if you want really creepy pulled off well, check out Chat's Code Majeste. The PER scenes are like something out of Videodrone and the main character's transformation and the overall status of alicorns in that fic I can only describe as "terrifyingly beautiful"
399968
i2.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/007/508/watch-out-we-got-a-badass-over-here-meme.png
Get this bloody thing updated