The Narrator and Celestia Part 1
Reaching into my wallet I took out my credit card and handed it over to the cashier, behind me I heard my Grandpa cough into his fist. Turning around I saw him place three six packs of beer into the cart. “Whoa, whoa, whoa I’m not paying for that,” I said.
My Grandpa snorted, “Like Hell you are.”
I frowned. “I thought we agreed on me only getting the door.”
My Grandpa waved his hand to the side. “Maybe you should learn to respect your elders and then maybe I’ll learn to buy my own things. Till then you’re paying for my beer.”
I rolled my eyes. “Alright fine, how much?”
“Eight fifty.”
I shrugged. “Well that ain’t too bad.”
“Each,” He spat.
“Well there goes my college funds.”
{Canterlot Castle}
“What I’m saying is if we reopen the trade route between Equestria and the Bison city states then we can solve our problems with the shortage of metals,” ranted the Equestrian Prime minister.
“Prime minster Virtuous, the reason why we ended the trade regulation in the first place was because of the constant bandit raids,” Luna stated.
Celestia sat bored in her throne, tired seeing her subjects bicker back and forth all morning. Sitting back in her throne she raised an eyebrow, glancing upwards she swore she could hear somepony speaking. Yet the only ones who were speaking in the room at the moment were her sister and the Prime minister.
Glancing over at her sister she needed to clarify that she didn’t have one too many drinks earlier this morning. Gently tapping her sister on the shoulder Celestia leaned in close to her sister’s ear and asked, “Sorry to bother you, sis, but do you hear that voice,” She asked.
Luna snickered, “Tia, I thought you said we weren’t allowed to tease the Prime minister.”
Celestia shook her head then frowned, she was getting real tired of this voice narrating her every action. “No, Lulu, what I mean is do you hear the… How can I explain this, I hear somepony narrating every other ponies actions.”
Luna frowned. “I’m sorry, Tia, but I’m afraid I don’t follow.”
Celestia sighed and scratched the back of her neck, instantly her face lit up and she said, “Like that, it just said I sighed and scratched myself.”
Luna grew concerned, “Sis, are you alright?”
“I-I’m fine why do you ask?”
“Well, I never seen act in such a way th-”
“Hello? I’m sorry to speak out of term here you’re majesties, but are any of you listening to me?”
Celestia turned to face the irritated stallion. “I’m sorry Mr. Prime minister. But I’m afraid we are going to have to cut the session short.”
The stallion frowned and bowed. “As you wish.”
Celestia let out a drawn out breath and began rubbing her temples; this voice is really starting to annoy me, she thought to herself.
“Tia, is everything alright you never ended a court session early.”
Celestia closed her eyes, trying to rid herself of this voice that was irritating the Hell out of her. “I’m alright just agitated that’s all, excuse me, sis, I have a few minor things I must attend to.” Celestia got up and left the throne room.
{The Chaos Chamber}
Discord sat lazily on his bed; gazing up at the ceiling he twirled his thumbs. Ever since he was reformed everything was just boring now, on the far side of his room he could hear a knock coming from his door. Discord sighed snapping his finger he appeared instantly in front of the door, taking hold of the handle the door swung open. “Why hello there, Celestia, fancy seeing you here.”
“Now’s not the time, Discord, now do you mind me asking, how did I know everything you were doing before you even opened the door?”
Discord frowned. “Sorry, what?”
“On my way down here I could hear a voice describing everything you were doing up until you opened the door.”
Discord raised a confused eyebrow. “I don’t understand what you’re saying, my dear Celestia.”
Celestia who was growing suspicious decided to ask. “Discord, is this your doing?”
Discord recoiled back. “What, no, no, no, I haven’t done anything out of term since I was reformed.”
Celestia sighed knowing that Discord must be telling the truth she took a few steps back. “Oh this is getting really annoying,” She muttered to herself.
Discord who was also beginning to grow curios decided to ask. “What exactly is this voice saying?”
“It’s narrating… Everything, describing every movement,” Celestia explained while she gently guided her hoof along the ground.
Discord smiled. “So you mean like this? Celestia sat there looking at Discord with a very agitated look while he narrated everything she was doing while another voice was doing the same–”
“Yes,” Celestia said furrowing her brows. “Exactly like that, now can you please stop I don’t need two beings narrating my life.”
Discord smiled deviously. “Oh the fun I could have doing that, and just by seeing you I can tell it just drives you mad!” Discord rubbed his palms together chuckling to himself thinking about how much fun he’s going to have later when toying with the guards.
“You better not toy with my subjects later,” Celestia said.
Discord frowned. “Wait–How–what!? You aren’t messing around you’re really having something narrate everything for you!”
Celestia nodded her head. “And yes it is driving me mad.”
{My Bedroom}
A knock came from my newly replaced door. “Hey, Boy, your Grandmothers been calling you for over the past ten minutes!”
I sighed, “Tell her I’ll be there in a minute I’m in middle of something.”
“You better not be doing what I think you’re doing,” My Grandfather said.
“What are you talking about, Grandpa?” I asked.
“They say doing that stuff makes you blind, now go help your Grandmother.”
“Why can’t you go help her?”
“Boy, I’m in the middle of chopping wood. Now go help your Grandmother before I blow freaking hole in this door.”
I sighed, “Alright.” Getting up from my computer I saved my progress and went down stairs. Opening the door I was greeted by my Grandfather who was looking down at me with a stern expression. As I closed my door I began heading down the hallway to the stairs, behind me though I heard a strange metallic noise coming from my room. “What the-?” My Grandfather pushed me forward.
“Come on, boy, your room ain’t going anywhere no move it.”
{Our living room}
My Grandmother was sitting in her wheel chair knitting. “Hey, Granny,” I said taking my gaze to the floor. “Grandpa said you needed some help.”
My Grandmother didn’t say anything; she just nodded her head and pointed to the quilt she was knitting. In the center was a large hole. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry again for yesterday.”
She nodded her head again. “Apology accepted now could you please stitch that part back together for me.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Granny, you know I can’t stitch.”
“Well there’s always a time and a place to learn, now get to it, boy,” She said, with a sigh I sat down next to her and attempted to get to work.
Taking the needle I began stitching while working I accidentally stabbed myself. “Ah! Fu–”
Behind me I felt my Grandmothers hand collide with the back of my head. “Watch your language young man!”
{To Be Continued}
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But the stupider it gets the funnier it gets.
Oh fuck, I'm scared.
this just gets better and better. i must say am enjoying this. i would laugh if i had some one narrate my life for a day (even better morgan freeman)
I like imagening the narators voice sounding like the guy that narates everything in the game Bastion
And the Narrator was being narrated.
2986278 I'm sorry maybe Moran Freeman can have a cameo.
2981985 He deleted all his work portraying to the whole fourth wall.
2983132 Glad you liked it!
2987867 You better be, pal, cause I'm coming for ya.
2987138 Oh that's a brillant idea, if this story continues to get the amount of fame it's getting now. I might just do that as a bonus chapter.
Not sure... I think I shall read this, JUST because my name is on it...
This is... Interesting. Though I am not sure as to whom the Narrator actually is... I suppose he is living with his grandparents, and his grandpa does not like him very much... He must have moved in only recently, which would imply that either his parents are dead, or live somewhere else.
From the useage of the shotgun I can imply that this takes place in the united states of america.
Surely if that shotgun was fired someone would have heard this? Unless, of course, they live on a farm.
The story has potential, what with it interacting with the world of MLP. Which is a neat original concept, I suppose.
I'll keep my eye on you...
2989679 First off the description don't take it seriously, but overall you're assumptions are really freaking close. And for the lack of detail I added I applaud you, and I'm glad you liked it!
This is insane, and I am glad to see it is Incomplete, as it means more is coming.
Fascinating and hilarous.
His grandfather is a jerk, and his grandmother is kind of forceful. I can imagine how this goes... The narrator really should get his own apartment as soon as possible though.
This amuses me i require more.
2991424 Well I don't think the grandpa's a jerk. He's been justified with his rude actions to this loser of a grandson, who just acted much like an ass towards his wife.
Course, as to why the guy isn't living with his parents instead is a mystery, but if answered will either change my opinion or strengthen it.