Into The Void

by Doctor Whooves PhD

Chapter the twelfth - Muffins raise IQ. It's canon.

Chapter the Twelfth – Muffins increase IQ. It’s canon.
The Doctor walked casually into the schoolhouse. However, it didn’t look as grand as he had been led to believe.

On the inside, there was a long dark corridor, with two classrooms on each side, and another room with a large, imposing door at the far end. The floorboards were old and creaky, and cobwebs adorned the corners of the room. A thin, invisible layer of dust coated everything.

As The Doctor carefully looked around, he noticed that each of the classrooms had been left in a state of disarray, as if the school had been lifted off the ground and whisked far away, leaving it to be forgotten. He took a deep breath, and gently pushed the giant door open.

The room emanated sophistication. Lining the walls were several tall bookcases, crammed with thousands of leather bound books on all kinds of subjects, ranging from trainspotting to spot training. Near the back of the room, a gray pegasus donning a stylish top hat and classy monocle sat with her legs crossed at an impressive mahogany desk, reading a large book titled “Advanced calculus and trigonometry : an expert’s recreational studies of fancy mathematics by Big Macintosh”.

The Doctor was taken aback. He certainly knew a thing or two. He walked on up to the pony’s desk, only to find he recognized who was occupying it.

“Wait… Derpy?” He said aloud, confused. “What on earth are you doing here?”

The pegasus quickly shut her book, and slammed it down onto her desk, creating a loud, bouncing echo throughout the room.

“You sound surprised. Did you really think a pony that possesses such extraordinary intelligence like myself wouldn’t naturally be drawn to an ever flowing fountain of knowledge such as this? Of course, I wouldn’t expect you to understand, what with you failing to grasp simple concepts such as string theory, or why balls bounce.”

“Something’s not right here,” The Doctor said in a skeptical tone. “This doesn’t look fun at all.”

Scholarly Hooves scowled at The Doctor. “Fun? is that really all that matters to you? Why waste time with that when we still don’t know how Equestria was made?! There are important issues at stake! Where did Alicorns come from? Does Princess Luna like bananas? Are there secretly robots living among us? VERY. IMPORTANT. ISSUES. There is no time for ‘fun’ when so much is left unsolved. Why is it there is so much we don’t know yet?”

“Well,” The Doctor pondered, “because if everypony knew exactly what happened, there wouldn’t be fan-fiction.”

Scholarly Hooves turned her nose up at The Doctor, adjusting her top hat so it didn’t fall off. “Is that really the best you can come up with?

The Doctor thought. “Well, there’s a certain joy in mystery, no? Surely you’re not going to tell me you aren’t filled with awe and excitement when you learn something new?”

Scholarly took a step back. “Well, sure…”

“And therein lays the balance! We learn new things, and then put them to the test! If we just studied all the time, and never put anything into practice, then nothing would get accomplished! Don’t you see? You can have fun whilst learning things!”

“Like what?” Scholarly asked, somewhat curious.
“Come here, I’ll show you!” The Doctor grabbed Scholarly, and pushed her through the doors into the second room on the left of the corridor. Turning on the lights, it quickly became apparent that they were in a kitchen.
The Doctor grinned, and started singing as he zoomed around the kitchen, tossing ingredients here and there, throwing bowls, pans, plates and big poofy chef’s hats all over the place.

Derpy, it’s really quite ok!
There’s no need to have that look of solemn dismay!
I’ve got just the thing to cheer you up, have you right as rain!
We’ll turn that frown upside down, a laugh all of the way!
Chuck a couple of shiny eggs into a frying pan!
Careful, not too roughly now, lest you want them to go BANG!
Next you’ll need some creamy milk, a brilliant alabaster!
Now plop in some bread, and you’ll quickly become the master!
Check it out, you’ve made a dish that everypony loves the most!
Look at its perfection; don’t you just love some French toast?
Break out the maple syrup, we’ll soak it down to a tee!
I really can’t imagine anything else that brings everypony so much glee!
Nothing can top this magic now, I’m sure that you’ll agree,
What we have is more powerful than the elements of harmony!
Check it out, you’ve made a dish that everyone loves the most!
Look at its perfection, don’t you just love some French toast!
A brilliant recipe that brightens anypony’s day!
It’s the perfect breakfast, snackalicious treat that makes all the gloomy clouds go-
a-Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

“Go on, give it a try!” The Doctor sang cheerfully, shoving the delicious food at Scholarly. Taking a bite, her face immediately lit up. Her top hat bounced off her head, and her monocle slid to the ground as he blonde mane’s colour returned.
Derpy smiled. “Thank you, Doctor. I… I just don’t know what went wrong.”
The Doctor smiled. “It’s ok, we all lose ourselves every now and then.”
The two ponies laughed, finishing up the rest of the warm French toast.

Chaos Derpy's Battle Theme (Scholarly Hooves' Theme)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCJKbRFEVWk

Doctor Whooves' French Toast Song
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k7lpu1PqYEY