Hello. I joined this wonderful site about 2-3 weeks ago and I've written one hypnosis based story and am currently writing another. But I really want to write a ship fic which I've mentioned before involving an OC. Now I'm pretty sure I can write a decent original character but.. I'd like some advice on how to write a good romance story if you all wouldn't mind providing advice. I'd be really grateful. I thank you for taking the time to read this topic and consider giving me advice, its very much appreciated!

Okay well, my advice from someone who steers super far away from romance typically, so therefore totally unqualified other than being in a relationship and reading way too many sappy stories... tangent, need to quit that...

Well anyways, what I would say is that you need to keep in mind that people are flawed. Like really really flawed... People in love? Stupid, blind, and flawed, but that can be very compelling as a character. When starting a relationship there is always that time of exploration of the other, learning about them and sometimes, finding things you do not like.

Since this is in the Sunset Shimmer group I can only assume you wish to have her be romancing it up with your OC. If you are using a based on canon Shimmy then you need to hit on her deep shame for what she has done. Would she hide it? Could she hide it? What would happen if your OC finds out? These are the important things to consider, beyond that, consider their personalities.

Would everything mesh well? Would your OC find Shimmy to be bossy? Would that annoy him/her? Is your vision of Sunset more cowed and less controling? Would he/she had met her prior and saw the confident young woman she was and discover her spirit-broken, easily frightened, with trust issues, and a crippling fear of the word demon?

These are the sorts of things you should be asking yourself. Then develop the story around them growing and supporting each other. If you can keep those sorts of things in mind I think you have a chance at a beautiful story.

3840658
That's some excellent advice thank you. Yeah I agree that the basics of a character is to have flaws as well as positives, I mean who wants to read about a character who's perfect in every possible way? Thank you for the excellent advice.

My advice would be to focus on making the personality of your OC likable above all. Make them complex without being overly complicated, and the two characters personalities compatible, but clash just enough so that conflict can be set up for them to overcome, thus making the resulting romance feel more rewarding. A small look into their back-story, maybe a chapter or two, without going too deep, leave some part of them unexplained in order to cause intrigue, and make your original character interesting. As for the romance itself, I'd say the most important thing is to evenly pace it out. Have the characters develop their feelings over a semi-long stretch of time. Go to fast, and it won't be believable. Go too long across too many chapters, and you'll wear out the reader. The conflicts would depend on whether or not you want the story to end with the two getting together, or if you want the story to explore their relationship. I would suggest reading some other romances to get an idea of what you would want in your story, while finding certain cliches and plot points that may be overdone, and you may want to stay away from.
That's really all I have to say at the moment, so I'll just wish you luck, and hope you can come up with something that readers will enjoy, and you feel satisfied with.

3840671

Well I can tell you I sure as hell wouldn't like a perfect character. I wouldn't be able to relate.

Romance is tricky though as love is in essence, trust. What people metaphorically do is put their happiness in another's hands and just trust them not to drop in and stomp on it. It's a very tricky thing to portray, especially the creation of that level of trust. I applaud for taking on such a story though. I will be waiting for it.

3840680
Thank you very much! I plan on publishing it in December, after I get a bit more fanfic writing experience with my hypnosis fics so I can make it as good as it can possibly be. I think the key to writing an OC is to give them some parts of your own personality like similar likes or fears, but not basing them to much off of yourself. After all, if you can relate to a character then the way you write them will be even better! And yeah my plan is for my OC to know what she did, but he still stays her friend/ romantic partner because she was his first friend after his move to CHS. Thanks once again!

3840678
Thanks for the advice! Yeah I agree that giving characters differences is a key in writing as conflict is integral in any story. Also thanks for the pacing advice I'll keep it in mind. Thank you once again!

3841297 I agree with this guy. For me though it's, power and trust. Give them the power to utterly destroy you, and the trust that they won't. That is what I define love as. Everything else just follows.

3841313
Ah. For me it's trust, understanding, compassion, and attraction to the other person that makes a relationship work. I apologize if my idea of love seems rather strange. Also does anyone know how to pick an avatar? I've been trying to use pictures but I can't have them uploaded for some reason.

3840699 in my opinion, to make the romance work the characters have to be similar, yet different. As in they have to have things in common without being clones. Have them both show some quirks about themselves that they would find strange, yet adorable. Adorkable always makes things better. but from what you've said, it sounds like you've got this. Looking forward to reading it, hope it helped!

3840644
I want to mention something specifically about Sunset Shimmer that I'm seeing an annoying trend of, particularly when it comes to shipping her...

There's lots of bronies jumping on the Shimmy bandwagon because they like what they see in Rainbow Rocks: Vulnerable, uncertain, unloved, eager-to-please. Waifu mode, basically. Awaiting her white knight.

Please keep in mind that is NOT Sunset Shimmer. That's 2 months out of her life of 18+ years. She has finished her redemption arc; the person you see in Rainbow Rocks has ceased to exist.

So who is Sunset Shimmer? For that, you have to consider who she was during her life of 12-13 years in Equestria, and then her 5 years as Canterlot Jr High/ Canterlot High alpha bitch. Sure, she's not an alpha bitch anymore. That doesn't mean she's no longer smart, bossy, ambitious, independent, driven, manipulative, and brave. Those qualities don't go away; she's not some author-wank blank slate like Bella. For an example of such a protagonist... you can check out Tohsaka Rin in Fate/ Stay Night. Not that they're clones, but they have similarities in temperament.

Lastly, because she's not a Bella, you better make sure that your OC love interest is worthy of an alpha like her. A loser who none of us can see being noticed by a winner like Sunset, would make your story crash and burn. Now, in the old days, the Greek hero wins over an Amazon princess by being more awesome than she is and "defeating" her to win her hand. Nowadays, under the deft pen of a capable author, there's other qualities a guy can embody in order to win over a Wonder Woman. Think carefully on that one, and ask friends to soundboard.

3840644

Advice, huh? I guess my general advice would be: "Don't believe everything you hear." Everyone has different ideas of how to write, so you are mostly going to have to figure out for yourself what makes sense to you and what doesn't.

As for writing romance, don't resolve your conflicts too quickly. I see a lot of romance writers make this mistake: They have the two characters become a couple and everything is roses, and then they just kinda keep going, writing cute fluff even though the story now lacks a direction. You don't necessarily have to end the story with "they lived happily ever after", but there's a reason most love stories do - there typically isn't a lot of interesting story to tell after that. If you want to keep going, you're going to have to introduce a new conflict right away, and it has to be something major enough that the characters can't live happily ever after until they've sorted it out.

At the same time, remember to use proper pacing and don't drag things out too much. Some writers know that the story ends with that big romantic first kiss and end up doing the opposite mistake of trapping the characters in a kind of limbo where they can't advance their relationship, typically because they refuse to confess their feeling to one another even when it's obvious there's something there. The love story has to feel dynamic and alive or the readers will figure out that you're stalling.

3840644 what kind of outfit do you have for sunset simmer

BACK!!! Sorry I was a little busy as my pc was disconnected for the internet for a few days. Glad to see everyone again!!!! Thanks for all the advice. MLai your advice sounds very useful and I'm glad to have heard it I'll keep her character in mind then. All of this advice is great!! I agree with most of it about pacing and conflict especially. Though jack what do you mean by "what kind of outfit"? Please explain.
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3843051
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3841338 any as long as they hit the knee.

3850712
But... her default skirt ends above her knees...

3851685 I am trying to get idea to Halloween next year

hmmmmmm... Well I was thinking it would be her default outfit. Also this would take place in between eq and rr actually. But I agree with Mlai and I even see it in Rainbow Rocks, Susnset isn't just trying to gain one or two friends. Her ambition is spurring her to earn the entire schools friendship. At least that's how I saw it. Thanks for the personality advice btw M!!!
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3852952 I saw rainbow rock but she should have a appropriate outfit.

3852952
Sunset may prefer skirts over pants or jeans, because ponies don't wear pants (outside of ninja costumes and chicken suits....). She would feel too constricted if she wears them, especially since modern pants/ jeans are all form-fitting.
But then, she also decided she'd wear a leather jacket, so who knows.

Susnset isn't just trying to gain one or two friends. Her ambition is spurring her to earn the entire schools friendship. At least that's how I saw it.

She once aspired to be a princess. I don't think that's gone, rather it's her ideas of what a princess is that's changed.

For ponies, their desire for friendship comes with that caveat. You can almost say it's an ulterior motive, but even if it's true it's hard for us to put a finger on what's so bad about that. For humans, it's just because it feels good, because evolutionarily the more social humans succeed and thrive. It's that way for ponies, but even more literal.

Interesting Idea Mlai... Thank you for this excellent advice! I will get started after I write a few more one-shots. Please provide any and all advice you may have!

3843051
*Applauds*
For that my friend, you get a moustache (and if you don't want one, you're still getting a moustache)!

3840644 Shipfic advice? Sure.

Don't.

3853945
Why not?

3865006 My personal predudices aside, I've found that the best stories keep the canon of the characters intact as much as possible (See A Legion of One, MIA, IAIMAY, Phoenix Wright: Turnabout Storm, and My Little Dashie).

If you ship characters that aren't canon though, you kinda ruin it.

3865366
Ah. That makes sense for some people I suppose. I get it Gamer but I'm going to write this story. I really want to try this topic and style of story writing Gamer. Who knows? I may be good at it, or I may not. All I know is that I wont know how well I can write a ship fic until I try to write it!!!

3865908 *shrugs*

You wanted advice, it's your call whether you want to heed it or not.

3840644 I can't quite agree with what 3840658 said; you can certainly try romance, but if you're going to do it right, don't half-ass it. Develop a character that would be compatible with Sunset (namely someone different than she is). The best relationships in fiction arise from differences between the two people, as they are then able to learn from each other in both the bad ways and the good, and that's interesting for an audience, as it also allows us to simultaneously get to know them both as well.

When you actually begin to develop their relationship, find interesting ways to have them meet, talk, and eventually become closer as partners. Stumble into cliches and you'll bore your audience to tears; this is where I think Someother was trying to stray you away, and yes, it can be difficult to write an original relationship that people care about, but if you seriously put effort into something, you can truly create something, for lack of a better term, magical.

3840644 One big thing I would suggest that you're OC (If you going that direction) needs to hold his own against Sunset Shimming, matching her in wit, and sarcasm. And if for some reason you're like me and you want to have this take place before EQG make him someone who wouldn't easily fall prey to Sunset's tricks of blackmail and humiliation.

3882654
That's one plausible way to frame an OC, but not the only way. If you build up an OC as "Just like SS, except wittier" or "Just like SS, except more cynical" what you have accomplished is create a Mary Sue who is same but better than the canon protag. It's easy to do it incorrectly, and then people hate that.

Another way that you're less likely to mess up with, is to make your OC a completely different person from SS. As an example, think back to a lot of pre-2000 action heroes. His sassy female love interest/sidekick is the brainy one with class, and he's the crude dumb one, or the one without common sense, or the one with big honkin' character flaws. But why does she fall for him and the audience root for it? The obvious answer is because he has a big gun, but that's not the real answer.

3882708 True, true. Another aspect I might also say is that perhaps the OC likes the bad girl aspect of Sunset's personality. Not that I'm saying the OC should (Unless you want to right a crazy OC) approve the whole destroying people live's becoming a she demon and enslaving the student populace for world domination part of it. But more of the tough minded, willing to do what's necessary, will kick you flank in a heartbeat kind of aspect to her. I've always liked stories that depict Sunset Shimmer as nice but if you harm her friends she will DESTROY you. I feel the bad girl (Or Alpha as you put it) side to her is sometimes missing in lot of stories.

(Also In a story of similar nature my OC has a love of fictional Villains. For he find them fascinating.)

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3882851
Thanks for this advice. The story was intended to take place between EQ and RR but I'll try writing for pre EQ and pre RR and decide which one I like better. And indeed if there is one thing I LOATHE in fan fiction it's Mary sues. I do love a good parody sue though. Planning to write a later one shot involving a crossover with Blazblue about parody sues.... If I get the game for Christmas that is... Now I just need to figure out how to solve my one major weakness as a writer and I'm good to go!

3882881 Oh trust me every fan fictions writer fear is to right a Mary Sue or Gary Bob (Unless you're me and you write for Flash Sentry and you just put him through crud the whole time but that's a different story...) Oh and if you do, a story taking place pre EQG don't be afraid do you're own take on Sunset Shimmer mental process (How she thinks, why she's doing what she's doing, and even what kind of evil tricks she pulls.) Those sorts of things. Could be interesting to see how the OC reacts.

3882906
OF COURSE!!!!! Character development is one of my favorite plot devices as suggested by my account name. Sunset Shimmer is my fave character simply for that one reason in addition to all of the others!!

3884600 Totally, also, I don't know why but for some strange reason I have this image in my head of the moment when Sunset reveals that she turned into a she demon (This is of course if the OC wasn't around during the Fall Formal) and the OC's first response is..."Should have turned into a dragon." Like the OC's is totally cool with it, and not even shocked. Granted my OC"s tend to be pop culture obsessed fantasy/sci-fi geeks who want to believe in a world where magic exist who knows like all the tropes and then he starts critiquing Sunset's plan and pointing out all the flaws and Sunset is just shocked an a little annoyed that he's critiquing her plans....I know it turns what should be a emotional moment into a joke scene but I guess that just my type of writing style.

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My plan was actually for my OC to respond with some line like this when someone mentioned the she demon. "I mean looking at all of you I imagined you all had to be on something but this just proves it." IDK

3884787 That's funny too. Also I see Sunset Shimmer as a girl with a temper. Not as bad post RR but still a temper non the less and one you don't want to activate

3884803
Yeah my plan was to joke that Pinkie was the schools main supplier. But thanks to your advice I may consider doing the story that's pre EQ... Ah but I need some advice for my big weakness as a writer

3884826 Well if you are going to do a Pre EQ story then you're big sticking point will be to decide if the OC will be just a observer throughout Sunset reign of terror of the school or will he have some interaction with her.

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Interaction. They become good friends at that point. Also my problem is a writer is that I keep writing more stories rather then finishing my pre existing ones... Advice?

3884849 Hmm...I have the same problem, (So many ideas in my head) well one thing you could do is have a few chapters done before you start posting, that way you don't annoy you're readers with long update waits (At least they'll have a good chunk of story to read). Another tactic I see is don't write in order, write the scenes that are firmly shaped in you're head that way you have them on paper.

Another ideas would be have a planning document, describe the characters, story and situation out then start writing.

That's one way to do it.

3884882
Thank you for the great advice!!! I take it at heart then!!! OKAY THEN!!!! One more chapter of my forced memories forced mothers story and two more One shots and I'll start writing this!!!!

3884894 Oh boy PM when you post the OC Sunset Ship fic , I am quiet interested to see how it all plays out. Or just PM me if you want any help, always happy to lend a idea or two.

3884898
Thank You very much!!! I have a few questions now about some advice if you wouldn't mind... First should I write it pre EQ or Post EQ?

3884910 Hmm...Well, I think a pre EQ story would more interesting only because they're a bunch of Post EQ stories already, break from norm is my saying. (The boy falling in love with the Bad Girl) .That's what I do at least. But it's you're story and whatever makes you feel more comfortable

3884925
Alrighty then! I don't want to make it instant infatuation at first sight mind you. I want to make it more of a curiosity about her bullying nature kind of beginning. I really hope that youll enjoy it when I write it

3884930 Oh I'm sure I will. I like the idea of him being more fascinated than in love at first. The mystery. Maybe he'll try to get on Sunset's good side to get close to her and learn more about her bullying nature.

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Yep! and next question my good sir/friend. Should my OC have a difficult or tragic backstory? Not a clichéd one mind you... I'll PM you the details

3884948 Okay...well how difficult/tragic are we talking. Mean brothers, parent's divorced, can't walk and disabled?

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Pmd you the details