Story Review #17 · 3:01am May 21st, 2022

Story review #17: The Opposite Reaction —by EpicGamer10075

Character’s:

Coco Pommel: Alright as sad as I am to say this I don’t like Coco in this story despite her being the main focus. She is just a very OOC insert nerd/teachers pet trope here. Plus she’s a simp!!!!! Overall not my favorite main character.

Gilda: Gilda However is the exact opposite for me she is an OOC character done right. She’s just the canon version of herself in high school with her predator and bully features heightened.

Surprise: PUNCHING BAG!!!

Which leaves me very split on the characters on one hand we have a stereotypical goody too shoes whose to shy for their own good & on the other we have a stereotypical bully who I just vibe with more for some reason. But overall I’d say the characters are decent but could’ve definitely been better if given more chapters or development!

Premise: Romantic one-shot about Coco (teachers pet) and Gilda (bully) have a run-in in the hallway where Coco swoons over her bodybuilder crush and Gilda is unable to say no when the nerd offers to help her study.
It was a decently written fic and I definitely enjoyed it but the story and the setting aren’t anything to write home about.

Grammar and punctuation: Moderate. It’s not unreadable or even that annoying but as a reviewer I did notice quite a few misspellings or wrong words in the story.

Dialogue: Gilda swears like a sailor and Coco stammers more then she says full length sentences. And I’m perfectly fine with that. The dialogue is actually a highlight in this story.

Flaws: The development of the characters and Coco’s characterization are really what holds the story back from being great.

Highlights: As stated above the Dialogue is a lot of fun and flows almost as freely as Coco’s……
….Anyways the other Highlight for me is the way Gilda just picks people up, lifts heavy things, throws her weight around. I know it’s a small thing but I still love the way you write bigger folk.

But as always those are just my 2 cents and I recommend you check out the story yourself and form you’re own opinion. It’s a fun One-Shot and I recommend you check it out.

Rating: 5/10 Curious Trixie’s.