Creative Writing Exercise: Make-Your-Own Smash Character Trailer

Huh.

You know, I never really thought that this would be my first ever blog post. Nor, indeed, that I would ever have reason to make one until my stories got popular (so, probably round about the heat death of the universe, though that may be a little optimistic).

But then... then I followed FanOfMostEverything's link to MythrilMoth's challenge to come up with a Smash Bros character trailer and, well, that was too much to resist.

As such, I came up with one for a couple of characters who, lets face it, should have been in Smash Bros and probably would have been had things worked out differently on the corporate side of things.

It's an average day in the Mushroom Kingdom. As such, Bowser is charging through a corridor with Peach, tied up and gagged, over his shoulder. He runs past the camera as we see, behind him, Mario come around the corner and throws a fireball at Bowser.

Cut to a shot to Bowser's side, following him as he runs and fireballs impact all around him.

After a couple of seconds, cut to behind Bowser again as he jumps into a Mario 64-style painting. The painting ripples massively as he goes through, the waves only increasing afterwards.

We cut, just before the waves reach a crescendo, to Mario running. As we do, we hear a shattering sound. Mario runs up to the painting as we follow tightly behind him. Mario jumps into the painting... only to impact it and slide down the wall.

Cut to Mario sitting on the floor, rubbing his head. He looks up and we see that, in the bottom-right corner of the painting, there's a hole in the shape of a corner jigsaw piece. Mario tilts his head, letting out a confused whine. He gets up, looking around for the missing piece.

As he does, a text box appears at the bottom of the screen, with a question mark on the left of it and bird-like grunting heard as the newcomer “speaks”.

“Hey, Shroom Breath!”

Cut to a low shot past someone's hip. The figure is mostly in shadow, but we can see, hanging down, a furry hand holding a golden jigsaw piece.

“Looking for something? Maybe we can help.”

A strange noise is heard and, as Mario looks back at the painting, the missing piece fades into existence.

Cut to Mario's face, confused for a brief second before it becomes determined and he gives a resolute nod. He puts his foot back, ready to sprint off into the painting... only to be knocked flying aside by a brown and red blur.

“Outta the way, Fuzz Face! Real heroes coming through!”

Cut to a wide shot of the painting with Mario slumped unconscious against the wall to the side of it. Punches, slams, assorted impacts and the occasional explosion are heard as the painting bulges out repeatedly, as if things are fighting to get out of it.

After a few seconds, a beaten up and dazed Bowser flies out of the painting, landing hard on the ground. Then, a second later, a beaten up Peach flies out and lands on top of him. Then a beaten up Little Mac, looking massively confused about what he's doing there, flies out and lands on both of them. Then, finally, the painting explodes into jigsaw pieces as the final fighters burst out.

(Note: I have neither the time nor the talent to mock up a splash screen, so I hope it's okay that I use this fine gentleman's.)

The pair land as Banjo holds his hand out to the side, a number of jiggies falling onto it. He tosses them up into the air so the fall into Kazooie's mouth. She swallows and the pose, with a “Guh-huh!” “Breeee”

Fighting Style:

Together, Banjo and Kazooie are something of an all-rounder, a little heavier and slower than average but not by much and with a mix of close and ranged attacks. However, their Down-B move allows them to split up, letting player become either Banjo, who is slower, but heavier and capable of taking hits, even negating some, and Kazooie, who is faster and has flight capabilities, but very light. Each of the two split-up forms is somewhat weaker than when they are together, but if one dies while split up, the other comes in and both must be KO'd before they lose a life. They each have slightly varied movesets and a different final smash

Special Moves (Together):

Smash: Egg Shot – Banjo and Kazooie shoot an egg out in front of them. The normal eggs do a small amount of damage, but can be fired in rapid succession and do have some knockback. However, once in a while, one of the eggs will be a grenade egg, which does much more damage and sends the opponent flying.
Forward-Smash: Beak Barge – a short dash forward that knock opponents back.
Up-Smash: Beak Bomb – After a short pause in which a red feather flies out of the pair, they dash in whatever direction the player holds, hitting anyone in their path.
Down-Smash: Split Up – Switches between the pair together and them split up. Holding L as you do it switches to Banjo, holding R switches to Kazooie. While split up, holding the aforementioned buttons switches between them and holding the other button or no shoulder buttons brings them together again.

Special Moves (Banjo):

Smash: Pack Block – a very short-reach attack where Banjo swipes his open pack in front of him, damaging any opponent he comes into contact with and catching any projectile in the pack, nullifying it.
Forward-Smash: Bear Barge – Same as when they are together, but does less damage.
Up-Smash: Pack Whack – Banjo whirls his pack around him, not getting much lift but moving horizontally and knocking anyone he hits aside.
Down-Smash: Switch/Reunite – As detailed above.

Special Moves (Kazooie):

Smash: Egg shot – Same as when they are together, but never has grenade eggs (as they're kept in Banjo's pack)
Forward-Smash: Fire Egg – Kazooie whirls around and shoots a fire egg behind her, which impacts on the ground next to her in a burst of flame.
Up-Smash: Leg Spring – Kazooie leaps up, barely moving horizontally but getting a huge about of height and slashes anyone in her way with her talons.
Down-Smash – Switch/Reunite – As detailed above.

Final Smash (Together): Breegull Blaster – Banjo takes Kazooie out of his pack and starts wielding her like a rifle, shooting out an incredibly rapid series of golden eggs. The pair cannot move during this, but rotating the control stick allows them to fire in any direction and the eggs have massive knockback and intercept projectiles, allowing them to rebuff anyone who tries to hit them.

Final Smash (Banjo): Taxi Pack – Banjo holds his pack open in front of him as a field emits from it. Anyone caught in the field is drawn into the pack. Banjo then puts the pack on the ground as Kazooie jumps in and the two proceed to beat the pack mercilessly, before Kazooie leaps off and Banjo fires the caught opponents out with considerable force.

Final Smash (Kazooie): Icy Clockwork - Kazooie fires a few ice eggs at the ground around her, which form a shell of ice. Then, out of the ice emerge a vast number of eggs that burst to reveal clockwork Kazooies. These Kazooies then home in on other characters and explode while Kazooie sits protected by impenetrable ice.

Costumes:
Standard
Dragon Kazooie (Banjo normal, Kazooie in her dragon form)
Gruntilda (Dark green Banjo with black Kazooie, shorts and backpack)
Bottles/Jamjars (Grey Banjo, Military green shorts, checkered backpack)
Mr Patch (Because why not, Bright green banjo, yellow shorts, red-and-white-striped backpack, White Kazooie, eggs are now small beach balls)
Weldar (All various shades of grey)
Yooka-Laylee (Green Banjo, yellow shorts, red backpack, purple Kazooie with red beak

Stage: Click Clock Wood

Stage transitions between four seasons – Spring has no special features, Summer drains the level's water, forms leaf platforms and has Zubbas flying above the stage every of often, Autumn refills the water and creates leaf piles (some large that act as hills and some small that slow down anyone entering them) and Winter freezes the water and has snowmen popping up in the background throwing snowballs at the field.

Assist Trophies:
Jinjos
Mumbo Jumbo
Humba Wumba
Gruntilda
Klungo

And finally, the most important part of any Smash fighter (and one I can't help but notice everyone else so far has missed):

Kirby hat: Wears top of banjo's head a la Charizard, but with a much smaller Kazooie-head fascinator on top.

(Note: Please bear in mimnd that I haven't played Smash Bros in years. As such, I have no idea whether this character would be even functional, let alone fun. I may have just come up with more annoying Ice Climbers. Still, it was worth a try.)

Comments

[Ri2]

...OH MY GOD YES. I loved the shit out of these two back in the day.