A sample of pastry · 12:38am Jul 30th, 2018
Though not fully awake, Twilight Sparkle had to hustle. She had remained awake long after the others had gone to sleep and now, she had to face the consequences. They had to catch an airship, as it was the fastest, most reliable way to cross the city due to traffic. As she trotted along, she wondered what might come next, when the skies were too full of traffic and airship travel became impractical.
Las Pegasus had been transformed by its new mass-transit system and now a veritable sea of equinity swarmed through the streets, with the city’s population having more than quadrupled in just a few years. The growth could only be described as explosive and the popular public opinion was that the city neared a state of collapse.
For a city in danger of catastrophe, there sure was a an awful lot of construction.
“Over there,” Seville said while pointing.
Turning her head, Twilight saw one of the new ultra-modern airships. It had a much smaller nacelle, but required far more electricity than previous generations. It didn’t run on coal like the older ships, but operated with a stirling engine heated by a closed-loop alcohol-based boiler. The alcohol boiled at a lower temperature than water and was heated by more alcohol, which burned far, far cleaner than coal. This new design was invented by Chanson Argentée, Emperor of Fancy.
Everypony said it was the future and Twilight was inclined to agree.
“It looks like a big steel zucchini,” said Applejack while she gave Twilight a hard shove to keep her moving. “And boy howdy, I can smell the hootch in the air. Smells like Granny Smith’s moonshine.”
“Zucchini?” Pinkie Pie pronked beside Seville, oblivious to the luggage strapped to her back. “Gee, I think it looks like a pen—”
“Pinkie Pie!” shouted Applejack,
“—cil. I mean, it sorta looks like a pencil, it’s long and skinny and kinda pointy in the front.”
“Come on, ladies, let’s get moving.” Seville, always a gentlepony, led the way through the massive crowd of ponies swarming through the transit hub.
So, uh, this story feels like it is dead in the water. Am I just wasting my time? Should I keep going? Like, I have no way of knowing until I get some manner of reader response. But the story numbers are bad. At this point, it is early enough to cancel it and delete it, removing it from the Weedverse forever. It can just be mentioned as background events in later stories.
Which honestly, is what I am inclined to do.
No, I think you should continue it, I think it's a geniunely interesting insight into the hidden tribalism of earth ponies, and the point where culture becomes discrimination, etc.
Please keep going!
Its been interesting and waiting to see where it goes.. I didn't realize Twilight told Celestia she was the manifestation of the Ink now but then with a power involved there is a good chance Celestia sensed not to mention there was the discussion about Sumac becoming an Alicorn without a doubt
I'm enjoying it. I feel that as often as "earth pony moments" or problems are mentioned (directly or in a roundabout way,) they aren't directly dealt with, something this story I think expands on.
But me want read unhorny pony story.
Noooo, don't cancel it. I want to know where Twilights thoughts go in regards to the Earth pony situation. I also want to see what Pinkie plans now that she's between occupations. I also want to see if they all end up drunk and 3 out of 4 married before leaving Las Pegasus.............
Besides, if you drop the earth pony centered story doesn't that make you anti earth pony too?!?!?!?!?
I like the idea of this story. I think the mix of characters is fascinating. We have seen two characters have huge life changes (Twilight's new responsibilities and Pinkie's transition), and I suspect that there is much more to come. I am hoping that the Twilight / Pinkie / Seville 's relationship will also get advanced. It would be a shame to push all of those things into the background of another story.
Twilight has been given effective charge of Equestria's internal politics, leaving Celestia to focus on the war. Almost anything internal to the country (and some things external) can have tribe as a component and could fall under her authority. Exactly what Twilight does with her new responsibilities, how she works with others, and to what ends, should be great fun to watch. Like many of the best ideas, it was surprising when you introduced it, but makes a lot of sense in retrospect.
I can see why Pinkie made the change she did. Sugar Cube Corner will likely still be a fine bakery with Sugar Belle (who will leverage her cutie mark and unicorn magic to make technically fine baked goods with great efficiency). But it will be a less 'magical' place, because the baked goods will be more conventional, and the shop will loose Pinkie's theatricality, her skill at improvisation, and her ability to personalize the product and pull out the 'exact right thing' that somepony needs.
I wonder if part of the engagement issue you raised is that the stakes of the story didn't seem all that obvious to me from the title, image, or description. And that the immediate threat the characters need to strive against has not yet come into clear focus. I have great trust that the best is yet to come.
You should write what you enjoy, and what you find yourself 'called' to write. But I hope that you continue with this story.
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You actually touched on the reason... war. That is exactly why Celestia pushed all of this off on Twilight. At this point in the timeline, the war is heating up. Celestia needs all of her focus on the war effort. So Twilight is effectively the domestic princess now.
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I feel like this has been coming since Chapter 64 of The Perilous Romance of Swans when Twilight gave Gosling the book with the history of the socio-economic reform and political upheaval from beyond the mirror. It was the first time we saw Twilight go against Celestia for the common good.
It also brings up lots of interesting questions
- Will Twilight run Equestrian domestic affairs from Ponyville, or from Canterlot?
- The existing government agencies and non-governmental constituents are all in Canterlot.
- Who will be her domestic advisors and staff?
- What demands will Celestia have for the war that will put stress on domestic tranquility?
- How will Twilight handle those demands?
- How will Twilight deal with refugees from war torn areas?
- Will the race / tribe of the refugees complicate matters?
- Who will take over running the school day to day?
And many more.
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Many of those answers have been hinted at already.
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Also...
Which Twilight gave Gosling the book?
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Was that Twilight a changeling?
Or from her time during Ink?
Or a different Twilight?
Sorry if I missed something.
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Pre or post ink Twilight.
Um, please don’t. I very much want to keep going with this.
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Since you bring it up, it would be cool if it was post Ink Twilight.
please continue! I want to see what happens and how Twilight handles the situation. She's now become aware of some of the ingrained prejudices Earth Ponies face and now has to figure out what to do in the mess. It's a fascinating set up from a worldbuilding perspective and I've been looking forward to this one continuing. I was hoping to maybe see Twilight embrace her Earth Pony nature a bit more and coming to understand that part of herself now that she's an Alicorn.
Also I'm digging watching Pinkie, Twilight and Seville dance around/figure out their whole relationship status.
i am enjoying it i like the side stories
also i just saw i was not listed as a reader for any of this
i guess i read the doc previews and never the published
Oh, I like the story so far and will definitely keep on reading it
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That does heavily effect the numbers actually. And those always those 1 or 2 things that are different. Why i stopped reading the docs