Valkyrie Sandora Rants: Kingdom Hearts 3 · 10:23pm Jun 25th, 2018
Okay, this is something that I need to just get off my chest. It's not so much a rant, as much as it's me letting my feelings out concerning this subject. A lot of people are really excited about Kingdom Hearts 3, and I'll admit that it looks like it could be fun. However, I'll be completely honest here, I'm not confident in this game being any good. In fact, I'll go out on a limb here and say that there's a pretty good chance this game is going to suck. This isn't just me being negative, this is me being cautious. If you're willing to stay with me here, I'll explain to you why I feel this way.
For starters, this isn't Kingdom Hearts 3. Kingdom Hearts 3 was at best Birth by Sleep, but we'll get there. Because of the stupid way Square Enix broke up the story, this is at the very LEAST Kingdom Hearts 7. Why do I say that? Because of all of the games that they put in between this game.
But those were all spin off titles!
No the fuck they weren't! A spin off title is a game that you can play in a main series that can be ignored from said series.
The Persona franchise is a spin off of Shin Megami Tensei, because you don't need to know anything about Persona to understand SMT.
Pokemon Mystery Dungeon is a spin off of the core Pokemon games. As long as you know what the fuck a Pikachu is, you'll be fine going in.
Metroid Prime is a spin off of the core Metroid games, as the story there is detached from the main titles, and they never call back to Prime.
Hell, Final Fantasy X2 is a spin off of Final Fantasy X, because the ONLY reason that game exists is to give you more Final Fantasy X if you didn't get enough the last time. Same goes for XIII2 and Lightning Returns if you didn't get enough of FF XIII. (spoiler alert: we ALL had enough of FF XIII).
Birth by Sleep, Coded, 358/2 Days, Dream Drop Distance, and any other "spin off" I missed can't be called spin offs because they are MANDATORY to play if you're to understand KH3. You can't ignore any of these games going in, because if you do, you're going to be so lost.
"Who's this guy that looks like Roxas?!" Play Birth by Sleep and you'll know.
"Why is Sora looking for these other people now?!" Play Coded and you'll understand.
"Wait, what's this "Real Organization XIII"?! I thought Sora killed Organization XIII!" Play Dream Drop Distance, and it'll make more sense.
Do you see the problem with that? This story is so all over the place, and Square Enix is trying to tie all of that together into one game. This goes into the other issue with these titles. They all together maked Kingdom Hearts way too complicated.
The first time they ever did something like this was with Chain of Memories on the GBA. Even THEN it was stupid, but Chain of Memories can more or less be skipped to understand the core plot. I NEVER beat Chain of Memories all the way through, and I understood KH2 perfectly well for the most part. Also, all Chain of Memories did was introduce Organization XIII and tell us how Riku and King Mickey got out of the Realm of Darkness, all of which was explained again in KH2.
Going into KH3 however, there's a bunch of new information you need to know about.
1: There isn't only one Keyblade. Actually, Keyblade Masters are the Jedi Order now.
2: Sora shared his heart with a boy named Ventus, who looks like Roxas, except that Ventus came first and let his heart rest within Sora after he kinda sorta died but not really died. This is why Roxas looks so different from Sora despite being his Nobody.
3: Xehanort is actually using the body of a boy named Terra, who fell into the darkness in a similar way that Riku did in the first game. Ironic because he actually did a ritual to give Riku the power of a Keyblade.
4: There's a girl named Aqua who's trapped in the Realm of Darkness. She was best friends with both Terra and Ventus and is the only one of her group that's remotely still alive. She's also the last living Keyblade Wielder to become a Keyblade Master through the Keyblade Jedi Order thing. See point number 1.
5: Xehanort was a Keyblade Master who sought absolute control of the power of Darkness, essentially making his side the Sith Empire. He was trying to create an ultimate Keyblade that was eventually broken up into the Kingdom Key (Sora's Keyblade) and the Darkside (Mickey's Keyblade), but was stopped by Aqua after he stole Terra's body and effectively made Ventus a vegetable.
6: Organization XIII had a fourteenth member named Xion, but she wasn't really a Nobody, more so a puppet made to absorb Roxas and become the new Sora. When she died, all memory of her was erased, but she's somehow important. Trust me on that.
7: Sora has to search for Terra, Ventus, and Aqua, along with reviving Roxas (because that's a thing apparently) and Xion (because why not), so they can all fight the Real Organization XIII, which is composed of all variations of Xehanort. Speaking of...
8: The Real Organization XIII is a group that's working with Xehanort for... something that I can't quite remember. All I know is that the members currently compose of Xehanort himself, his Heartless that you fought in the first game, Xemnas, Xigbar, Saix (yes they're all still alive, shut up), and Xehanort as a teenager for some reason. They even tried to get Sora to join them, and it almost worked. Yeah, think about that.
9: Sora didn't pass the test to become a Keyblade Master, even though he's ALREADY PROVEN THAT HE'S SURPASSED EVERY FUCKING KEYBLADE WIELDER IN THE WORLD!!!! (looking at Kingdom Hearts, Chain of Memories, and KH2 for examples). But Riku passed, so it's cool.
10: The members of Organization XIII (the ones from Chain of Memories and KH2) all lived because once their Heartless and Nobodies were both defeated, the original person was revived. Also, Axel is back, and he's a good guy now. He's also got a Keyblade. Got it memorized?
There, I saved you a bunch of trouble. You're welcome. But do you see how this is an issue? That's A LOT of information we need to know going into this game, and I'm sure I missed something writing all of that down, and I played ALL of these games.
You see, going into Kingdom Hearts 2, Square Enix knew the plan, so they didn't need to introduce a bunch of new ideas. We already knew about Heartless, Kingdom Hearts, and the Keyblade. All we needed was to be introduced to Organization XIII, the concept of Nobodies, and how the fuck Riku and Mickey Mouse got out of the Realm of Darkness unscathed. Okay, cool. I'm good going into Kingdom Hearts 2 now.
But with KH3, there wasn't a clear plan. If you look at the "spin off" titles, you see that they were building the plot for KH3 as they went along.
Birth by Sleep told us about Keyblade Masters and introduced us to Xehanort.
358/2 Days introduced us to Xion.
Coded showed us what Sora's going to be doing in Kingdom Hearts 3 probably.
And Dream Drop Distance introduced us to the Real Organization XIII, how people who were Nobodies got revived, and how Axel came back.
See? They were building KH3 as they went along. THAT'S why there were so many games. It wasn't to build suspense. It was because they made a promise for a third game, but then realized they didn't know what the story of said game would be, so they covered their asses by putting out a bunch of "spin off" titles.
Know another franchise that went this route? The Matrix. The first movie was perfect. It was simple, straight forward, and while it didn't end with the computer world taken down, it basically showed that there was hope now. Also, the concept was simply "what if the world you lived in wasn't real?" That's a chilling idea in of itself. Then the second movie came out, and they put their heads so far up their asses that the plot got convoluted as FUCK. This was because they were trying to top themselves after the masterpiece that was the first movie.
Now, could I be wrong about all of this? Absolutely. In fact, I hope I AM wrong about all of this. I hope that Kingdom Hearts 3 is everything we wanted it to be. Gameplay wise, it looks really fun. The trailers are showing some really interesting concepts storywise. So who knows? This might just be the game of the century. But honestly, I'm not holding my breath. I liked Mighty no. 9, but it wasn't as great as I wanted it to be. THANKFULLY Persona 5 was. But Kingdom Hearts 3? I'm sorry, but I can't be too excited about this game. As a story writer who made the same mistake with one of her pieces (Inner Demons II anyone?) I just don't have high hopes for this game.
But the graphics look really pretty!
Oh shit, that's true. 10 out of 10, game of the year.
I'm Victoria,
and I need a glass of water.
To be honest the Kingdom Hearts franchise is in its dying gasps. But you are right. They took too long and brought out these ridiculous spin off games that are each supposed to be canonical in some way shape or form. So the entirety of Kingdom Hearts 3 is most likely going to fall apart and have about as good as a payoff is finding out who Rey's parents are in The Last Jedi. (PS that movie Blew too)
To be fair they make the HD remixes so people either played the games they missed or in the case of 358/2 (I hate that name so much) and Re:Coded watch the story and so yourself some trouble. And now on PS4 they have an all-in-one package that has the HD remixes, and 2.8 I'm saying the title will get you KH3 on release. Second, it's no longer Axel but Lea. Got it memorized? Third: Did you see what happened to Aqua in the trailers for 3? Fourth: I know that joke at the end you got from She Who will Not be Named. (Yeah after all the crap she's tried doing to Josh and his friends this year. I'm done giving her anymore chances to clean up her act.)
You do an entire post about a game possibly sucking, and only give one line to the GAMEPLAY! Everything we have been shown regarding the meat of this game looks fantastic, a return to KH2's spectical and moments of glory style, and yes it looks and sounds amazing. That is what will decide of the game is good or not.
Second, you are way overblowing the need to play all of the games, you only need to play KH1, KH2, BBS, and maybe DDD to get the ghist of the story, and on that note...
to quote someone i'm sure you're familiar with "expecting a well written story out of Kingdom Hearts is your mistake". This series has been loud and proud about being a hammy fanfic since the the first game, and taking it seriously is just a wild goose chase. Nomura certainly dosen't expect you to do so, as evident by his surprise that the Aqua reveal from the Frozen trailer overshadowed the fact that Frozen is a KH world!
So yeah, Kindgom Hearts 3 is going to be great, no questions asked.
I understand what you're saying, it's a lot to take in for a game, it kinda makes me miss the old side-scroller games I grew accustomed to when I was a kid
And Terra's, Aqua's and Ventus's master is Luke Skywalker.
I'll admit, I have a lot of KH titles to play.....though least in recent years Square has made it an easier task; collections on one console as oppose to buying/emulating multiple systems.
Oh that last one hurt me more then I care to admit because soooooo many people use that excuse.
I Just hope that after 13 years and 4 games, kh3 is fun to play and has a good story
I'll admit the KH plot is beyond convoluted as hell, I'm not blind to the obvious, but honestly? I'm still going to get KH3. Because I want to see where this batshit insane Phineas and Ferb type rollercoaster of a plot leads. I've seen the other KH games played and they look fun, especially KH2, and I really want to see if they can make KH3 make sense provided you know what the hell's going on. But seriously though, Mugen Kagemaru is right. Play Samus Returns, it's fucking fun, and it ties in well with two other Metroid games, one that's considered the best of the 2D Metroid, and the one with the haunting footsteps.
It's actually really easy to follow the basic plot of the story if read Jiminy Cricket's journal or looked it up online
4957359
I enjoyed Samus Returns a lot. The new mechanics were, odd, took a while to get used to, but it was a lot of fun. And, unlike in the original, the Final Boss feels like a final boss. You can't just instakill it, no, it is a LONG and ARDUOUS fight.
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I never played the original Metroid II, so I had no expectations. That said, I had fun, I was challenged, and I beat the game. I'm satisfied personally.
4957378
I have not. Haven't had the chance.