UniqueSKD TRIES to get back into writing, decides to do new chapter to Earning Their Trust. · 1:32am Aug 3rd, 2017
Thorax stepped out of his new room, his best smile on his face. However, no sooner had he stepped through the door did his hoof slip on something soft, and he found himself getting close and personal with the hard wooden flooring, face first and with a loud thud. He groaned as he lifted his head, a slight daze enveloping his mind. There were sounds of muffled childish giggles close by. Shaking his head as he stood back up on to all fours, Thorax turned to his side and was met with the faces of six little foals looking up at him, all of whom were giggling hysterically at the. Behind the little foals, still confined to her wheelchair, Jet Shine sat with a hoof over her mouth and shaking her head as she tried to hold back a giggle of her own.
Thorax gave his onlookers an awkward smile as he got back up onto his hooves, dusting himself off as he stood to attention in front of the little foals. Jet Shine rolled her wheelchair over to the side of him and placed a hoof on his shoulder. "Looks like you just learned one of the first rules to working here, Thorax," she chuckled as she held out to him a small soft leathery ball. "Always watch out for the children's toys. The last thing I need is covering a medical bill."
Jet turned to the children still present in the room. She cleared her throat, and they all stood straight and to attention in a line, as though they were presenting themselves to some potential adopting family. "Now children, this here is Thorax; the changeling I told you about yesterday. I know that he looks a little bit scary, but I assure you that he means us no harm."
Jet rolled her wheelchair towards the end of the line and began to roll her way across the line, introducing each foal one by one to the new changeling carer. The first foal was a small Earth pony colt with a messy light-green mane and yellow coat. He had a cutie mark depicting some kind of strange-looking fruit. "This is Mango," Jet said. "He's one of our older residents. Say hello to Thorax. Mango."
"Hello," he said with a small wave of his hoof.
The next foal was a little pinkish-gray unicorn filly wearing large glasses. She had curly purple hair with dark blue stripes running through it. On her flank was a cutie mark of a telescope. "This here is Night Gaze. She's into studying stars and constellations."
"H-hello, Mister Thorax," Night Gaze said with a courteous bow.
That's all I have so fat for the new chapter. What the fuck am I doing? I have no clue how to progress my own story. So I'm going to need an editor or a proofreader or whatever you call them to help me with this one, gang. Just someone to help make this crappy chapter just 10% more decent at least so I can upload and not have as many rotten fruit thrown at me.
So if any of you want to take a dare and help with my travesty of fanfiction, please let me know. Meanwhile as you try to think of how to (im)possibly make this chapter decent, I'm going to bed and hoping I don't wake up in the morning so the rest of the world doesn't have to suffer my existence any further.
Good luck, sir.
4622093
First of all, I HATE it when people tell me they'd like to help but they can't. I HATE that soooo much
And second, your first edition of your story was received very well because 80% of people on this site are primitive cunts. Meeester included. They don't appreciate poetic effort, or they're too dumb to understand how rhyming works. Your story isn't a masterpiece, but it's not awful. Maybe with a few tweaks it would be better. But then again let's remember what site you're submitting your story to - THIS ONE. This site, where child rape stories get into the Featured box.
4622096
What is that supposed to mean? "Good luck Kiefer; you're going to need it?" Tell me what context you meant that comment.
4622406
I feel like that isn't addressed nearly as much as it should be, sometimes I feel like I should be ghosting my IP so Chris Hansen doesn't start messaging me on Skype to take a seat.
4622571
CHRIS HANSEN? YOU SAID THE SECRET WORD! ENJOY THE CLIP!
4622406
Well, your blog title says you're trying to get back into writing, so I'm hoping a favorable wind blows to carry you toward that endeavor.
4622732
Fair enough.
Nice work man!
4622571
Excuse me sir but...
4622612
I see. Well, if it's all the same to you, I'm going to go take a nap and get assassinated during said nap.
4622980
Jokes on you, I put forever glue on the chairs and counters. We're trapped here for the rest of time.
4623995
Officer... get someone to carry him and what he's glued to away. Also fetch me another pair of shoes so I may leave.
4624278
Very clever Chris, standing on the counters to avoid any possible traps, but you couldn't possibly have expected this! geekologie.com/2015/06/09/robots-falling-down.gif
4625887
*Chris sighs in exasperation* Y'know what? I don't care enough at this point. Officers, do whatever you need to I'm going home to get a beer.
4629528
Nice try, but I've replaced both the officers and your beer with child pornography!
4633660
NOOOOOOOOO
*Chris then proceeds to handcuff himself and goes to jail*
4634456
That was the closest thing to a readable fanfiction I've ever been a part of. I can die happy now.