Calling for Editors

Hey, me again.

I think anyone who reads my story is aware of how this works; reply if you want to look at the chapter in its rough form and offer criticism. However, you should know that I'm not hugely happy with this chapter, so -- if you think there are things that can be added to the chapter to improve it -- by all means, please let me know.

Preemptive thanks.

Comments

[FanOfMostEverything]

I'll happily give it a look, though I'm only available in the evening for this sortof thing.

[nightwalker]

Sure, let's have a look

[Joural]

Id be willing to give it a look, but cant before the weekend- busy work week(bluh, 44 hours)

[TheTownCrier]

I'll give it a go.

[Travolore]

I'd be willing depending on what you need.
T

[Doggyshakespeare]

I'm willing to give it a look.

[SaintAbsol]

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I've taken the advice of Joural and removed the section at the beginning and added a few things to extend the other scene as well as added about a page's worth of text to extend the second scene. I would like if you would give the chapter a look again; the link you have should still work.

[TheTownCrier]

A few minor spelling errors, nothing too bad. So far.