Because I don't have a review post ready today, some gems I've seen on Reddit since the last time I posted about them · 12:23am Nov 5th, 2016
Grandure: "I'm not scared of a computer passing the Turing test... I'm terrified of one that intentionally fails it."
Raske3zy: ITT: a bunch of computers posing as redditors
CarryTreant: The scary thing is, if there was a hyper-inteligent AI out there hiding its presence from us, I imagine it could quite easily manipulate people via social media without ever being detected.
NSA_Chatbot: That's preposterous.
Commander-A-Shepherd: Fun fact: some countries have armed security in Mcdonalds.
ShakesperianShadows: It's why the Hamburglar hasn't been seen since the 80's. Mandatory minimums are rough!
Nitrous-vengeance: TIL that in 2015, two day care employees in New Jersey were imprisoned for running a toddler fight club amongst a dozen boys and girls aged 4-6.
RockyTopBruin: Plot twist: There was actually only one day care employee all along!
Non-alcoholic Moonshine Unsweet Sweet TeaFrostyNugs: It's like calling water "non-alcoholic, unfrozen-ice vodka"
Steven Hawking: If Aliens call, we should be wary of answering.
Pleasemind: When Aliens call they will be saying "Hello Earth? Have you seen this man? He's a fugitive from our planet." and they will show a picture of Stephen Hawking.
Wistie: I have a friend that's so allergic to metal of almost any kind that if you put it in her hand it will start to feel hot in under a minute and if it stays there she'll break out in hives in under 5 minutes.
MercuryMinded: She's secretly a faerie isn't she?
Wistie: Or maybe a druid? Now I’ll have to check.
VladBelmont: Ptolemy tried to amass every book at the time in the Royal Library. When people came to Alexandria they had to surrender all books in their possession that the library didn't own - so yea it was pretty much all the important texts of the time.
Esantipapa: So if I were to go to ancient Alexandria, they would take Ptolemy books?
GreenGemsOmally: She's also accused of being "criminally inept and stupid" while also being this Machiavellian super villain that manages to orchestrate the perfect political murders multiple times to cover her tracks and despite decades of investigations they just can't seem to stop her! ahhhhh!
Trevize1138: A true successor to the Obama legacy because of how he's similarly a Muslim atheist out to enslave us under Sharia Law by legalizing gay marriage.
Daily News: Don King drops N-word, explains why ‘white women’ should vote for Trump in bizarre introductory speech for GOP Nominee.
Robvicsd:
Trump: Lets find a well respected member of the black community to campaign for me.
Conway: How about OJ?
Trump: Isn't he in jail?
Conway: Barry Bonds?
Trump: I hate baseball.
Conway: Don King?
Trump: Bingo.Ryan924: False. I once met Trump at a Mets game.
Thenurge26: More proof he hates baseball.
Tlk742: Can confirm. I am a Mets fan, hate baseball.
Fretbuzz40: Haven't seen that much character assassination since Game of Thrones.
AgoraiosBum: Wait, I'm still on season 1, what does that mean?
DoorLord: Game of Thrones is notorious for never killing a single character in the entire books/show (though this is hotly debated as there a few dead in the very first chapter, though most argue that those deaths didnt happen "in the story"). Even when one should be knocking on deaths door, they always find a way to slip away, evil, good, smart, dumb, always live. (Don't worry, this isn't much of a spoiler, it becomes evident quick)
It's basically become an internet joke to say GoT has a lot of deaths and people always say "your favorite character WILL die!!!" To keep newbies on the edge of their seat whole watching/reading. Cause I guess people think it's funny to straight up lie on the internet as a joke? /u/fretbuzz40 was just making a joke off the GoT joke.
It's a really good series tho! I'm excited for you!
Wikipedia: An estimated 4.7–5.3-meter (15–17 ft) female orca immobilized an estimated 3–4-meter (9.8–13.1 ft) great white shark. The orca held the shark upside down to induce tonic immobility and kept the shark still for fifteen minutes, causing it to suffocate. The orca then proceeded to eat the dead shark's liver.
Martinanese: Holy fuck, I wouldn't wanna meet that Orca is a dark coral alley.
Diamondflaw: Let's just take a moment to appreciate that a mammal suffocated a fish underwater.
Chagrin: Putin looks so weird when he smiles.
Mvanpop: He looks like an evil Dobby from Harry Potter.
ForgotMyFathersFace: We should do Ukraine a favor and sneak him a sock.
Wootfatigue: My garage raccoon likes to use my rack of winter tires as a fort. He's usually really good about keeping it clean so I don't check it very often, but today I noticed he was peeing inside of one of the Hankooks. Is there anything in pee that could harm the inside of a tire?
Menasan: “My garage raccoon.” Wait, what?
Wootfatigue: You know, a garage raccoon. It's like a barn cat or a junkyard dog, but for the garage.
Lord7777: Who are you and why do raccoons and also possibly squirrels love you so much. I would be scared to let a raccoon get that close to me intentionally.
Knotty_pretzel_theif: OP is Disney Princess.
...
HouseOfBull3209: You have a garage raccoon?
Wootfatigue: You don’t?
...
MatthewMadness14513: How about a mechanic raccoon?
A_Cave_Man: Am I the only one who works on my cars without raccoon assistance?
Madnessman: Right? Is this normal? OP is so nonchalant about his garage raccoons that I’m starting to feel self-conscious about my lack of garage raccoons.
Strasy: I realized I was living in the future when, sitting in my home office, I suddenly got an alert on my phone that I needed to leave in 10 minutes to make a dinner reservation because there was an accident on the highway.
I never explicitly told my phone where I was, where the reservation was, what time the reservation was for, etc. It read the reservation confirmation on my phone, added it to my calendar -- a calendar I didn't even know I had as part of my Google account -- checked traffic, checked my GPS location, and acted autonomously to send that alert.
Politico: Trump threatens to attack Clintons if more damaging tapes of him go public.
Infernalism: He’s been attacking them. What’s he going to do? Start tweeting bullshit on two phones at once?
PanglossTheTutor: Trump used to sleep with Hitler's book of speeches next to his bed.
John-Carlton-King: How reliable is this? I swear to god I almost can believe anything about that douche at this point
Trogon: Yeah, he's got the anti-antisemitism down, but I don't believe for a second that he's actually read a book.
Carph1: Why are airlines allowed to ban smartphones that tend to detonate but not people that tend to?
UnconditionalHope: It's called the No Fly List.
94672721582: Technically speaking, everyone on the No Fly List has not exploded yet.
Tomo225: How does someone even make something like that move so fluidly or at all? It's like they would need a degree in engineering or mechanics or something. It's insanely impressive.
SkylerYee: Yeah he runs a crew of mechanics and they have been doing cosplays like this. This year the whole crew did ALL of the Overwatch characters except Winston. He was the same guy who did the Hulkbuster in NYCC 2015. I had a chance to talk with him about his work last year.
Chiimaera: The character who was meant to cosplay as Winston was shot earlier this year. It's a sad story actually, guy was minding his own business, trying to help a kid out and then out of nowhere... Yeah. World can be tough. He'll be missed...
Mighty_Bandit_: Fuck. Link?
Chiimaera: http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-36414813 Still feel bad for the guy, he was a good guy, never did anything wrong.
Ofrantea: Probably some 35Q in the US Army. hes got balls.
Lojikil: Out of curiosity, why would you guess 35Q, and not 17C? or 29E?
Workerdrones: Forgive my ignorance, what are 17C or 29E?
Lojikil: 35Q, 17C, 29E, 25D are all US Army Military Occupational Specialities (MOSs). All branches have MOSs, but they vary across service (for example, something like the Army 17C MOS would be a Marine 0689 MOS, kinda).
With your specific question, the following MOSs are:
35Q is "Cryptologic Warfare Specialist" (a more "strategic" cyber MOS).
17C is a "Cyber Operations Specialist" (i.e. the offensive side of cyber operations).
29E is an "electronic warfare specialist" (i.e. wide-spectrum electronic warfare, EM, &c.).
25D is a "cyber network defender" (i.e. blue team monitoring)
Things like the new "Joint Cyber Analysis Course" (JCAC) and the army equivalent will pump out lots of these new "cyber" MOSs to help beef up DoD/Army defenses.
Previously the DoD usually relied on things like INSCOM, the DISA, and the NSA to deal with these sorts of things, but they've decided to train up forces more heavily of late (this is a huge simplification of what they're doing, but it's thegeneral trend).Disturbd: Who are you people?
VapeApe: Weaponized nerds.
As a former Make A Wish kid, I do too. Still enjoy my experiences till this day, and it was 18 years ago. I went to Hollywood, felt like a dream!
Aren’t you supposed to be dead?
FruitbatNT: Hold up... you bought a "farming sim", in order to spend your fake farming sim money, to hire an AI worker to plant fake grass....
You know what, no, I refuse to think about this any further.Barnmallow: In Euro Truck and American Truck you can hire fake drivers to drive fake freight for your company because delivering freight yourself is boring.
FruitbatNT: But then...why....
No, I will not do it.
Petit_bleu: Who introduces themselves like that? "Hi, it's the clinically depressed man!"
BattleAxeNelson: Hey, it’s me, the pizza man! "Oh that's okay, he must be made of pizza".
TooLazyToRegisterLol: That would be awesome. I used to believe black men were made of chocolate when I was younger.
RickGrimesLol: You mean they're not?
Earleebird: We need stronger crossbow laws!
Sw04ca: The Pope tried that in Second Lateran Council of 1139. It was ineffective.
Gmikoner: Tell me you just googled crossbow laws... there's no way you knew that randomly off the top of your head.
Sw04ca: After I wrote it out, I did use Google to make sure I had the date right. After all, nobody wants to be that asshole that mixes up the dates of the Second Lateran Council and Third Lateran Council, right?
AreYouTheGuy: Yeah totally. I god damn hate whenever anyone mixes up the two.
...
Absurd_olfaction: No, some of us weapon nerds knew that a dude named Innocent prohibited the use of crossbows against fellow Christians.
Luckierbridgeandrail: What we need is a dude named Christian who prohibits the use of crossbows against innocents.
PhilosopherFLX: In a world with crossbows, there are no innocents.
Mutfundtaxetf: /r/Its1406andthisisdeep
...
Wrgrant: How do you shoot 3 people with a cross bow, given the time it takes to rewind and cock the thing? Unless they were all unconscious or tied up or something.
AreYouNotShpongled: I think modern sport crossbows are actually a lot easier to cock than the medieval variety was. I don't know - I haven't touched the things since the Pope banned them in 1139.
Newspaper Headline: Dark sense of humor “can be dementia warning sign.”
HalBriston: Well, we’re all fucked.
Ginx2666: Don’t worry, we’re mostly safe – very rarely something posted here is funny.
I almost got an aneurysm trying to decode whatever the hell it was supposed to be. Apparently Moonshine Sweet Tea is a brand, not a descriptor.
-trying not to laugh-
-laughs-
4285473
Yes. It is a very uh, special brand name.
My question for the garage raccoon guy is, how many others you you have that you need to differentiate where they live? Have you also got a kitchen raccoon? A lounge raccoon?
These are all things of beauty... with the exception of the Overwatch cosplay. I've grown to despise that meme and how it's infected my favorite gorilla scientist from the moon.
Aside from that? Gold.
4285473
Would you like to buy a Safe™ car? Some Clean™ water? Some Quality™ tacos?
4285972 The meme is dumb but that implementation of it was beautiful.
So many of these are great, thanks TD
4285595
Nah, I bet it's all the different animals. Garage raccoon, garage mouse, garage bear, etc.
Trump, an anti-semite?
I've actually drunk Non-alcoholic Moonshine Mint & Honey Sweet Tea. I liked it, but I like mint tea.
They have some stuff on the label about being brewed fresh, one kettle at a time, so I think the moonshine bit's trying to make it sound homemade or something.
--Sweetie Belle