Re-edited a scene in Chapter 51

Hi, all. I just did a partial rewrite of the Candy-Cherry scene in Chapter 51. The plot hasn't changed, but I tweaked the narrative to eliminate some false drama that several readers brought to my attention.

The chapter highlighted the fact that the character of Cherry did not quite come across as I had intended. Characters in my stories tend to write themselves, if that makes any sense, and that's a good thing. Usually. Cherry I likely should have tweaked a bit, but rather than rewrite the whole story, I'll carry that bit of lessons learned into future stories.

If you liked the scene as it had been originally written, you don't need to re-read it unless you're simply curious, as the changes don't affect the remainder of the story.

Thanks again, everyone, for your support

Comments

[Admiral Q Ponyform]

Darn, i hoped for more. I just don't like Cherry leaving at all. A first real negative in this story.

[Arararagi]

4148926
I thought the point was rather well made though. Candy has to move on with her life, and Cherry was getting in the way of her doing that.

It also lets me have hope for a spin-off sequel featuring Cherry's adventures!

[Admiral Q Ponyform]

4150191 I disagree.