Retrospective and the future · 12:12pm Jul 1st, 2019
Hello, all. Sorry this post has been delayed, but I've been spending some time catching up with other authors' stories in the Pandemic universe. Before I continue, I was given a link to some artwork concerning Jenny and Laura from the original story, commissioned by reader Dogman15. Enjoy!
https://www.deviantart.com/eillahwolf/art/Laura-and-Jenny-Tanner-803373451
As with every story I post, I like to take a step back after it's completed and try to look at it from a fresh perspective. Overall, I would say that the story accomplished what I had set out to do. That's not to say that there is nothing to improve upon. No story is perfect, and the larger and longer the story, the more chance there is for imperfections to creep in.
One thing I felt could have been better is the overall structuring of the story. With so many characters and subplots going on, it was sometimes hard to know when to let one go for a while and switch to the other. Sometimes I had to stick with a particular subplot for a longer time than I had really wanted, but I was having trouble finding a good breakpoint.
Some may say that the problem is that the story had too many characters. I have trouble with this criticism because the characters are what make the story. Considering the wide range of effects that the post ETS world had on people, I felt it necessary to represent a braod array of views, beliefs, and life situations.
So what about the future for the series?
I plan to write at least one more novel in the series. There needs to be a final resolution concerning the Devourers if nothing else. I'm not sure when I will start writing it, other than it will be after the summer is over, and there will likely be a lengthy planning phase first.
Finally, I'd like to close by stating that I was both surprised and flattered to see how many people wanted to write for this universe. I had never expected it to become this popular. I am still in the process of catching up with the works in the submissions folder, but I promose to get through all of them and get them moved into the appropriate folder.
That said, I appreciate all the support that my readers have shown me, and I hope you will stick around for what the fuiure holds for the series, as well as my writings in general.
Thank you for making the series!
I so need to catch up.
I am a bit ambivalant on that one. Because yes, widening the scope of the story was a good idea, but in the end the cast felt very limited, only a handful of character really got attention and they all knew each others and all lived in the same little corner of the world. We had something like what? 5 locations for the story mostly? It was very limitted for a story that tried to tell a broad scope.
At the same time, yeah, it was already too much and you struggled to keep up with all the thing you wanted to tell. I mean, poor Tom just disapeared and just re-appeared in the epilogue.
I suppose at least you had what you wanted: you tried something different to learn from! So there is that!
I wouldn't say there are too many characters and plots in this one, but then again I read through Picking Up the Pieces and that one had so many characters and plots going on (many plot threads that were left to hanging for other stories too) that it made Aftermath look extremely tame in comparison. Halira looks like she learned from her mistakes and has had a more focused plot thread since, and I am sure that the Devourer story from you will be more focused as well. I can guess some of the characters for that story already, figure we'll be seeing more of Jenny since the Narrative seems like it will be important, and I figure Jessie Middleton will be making the transition over to your story since she seems to be a key player (not that I mind she has been a fan favorite since she first appeared in the side stories and I want to see her finally grown up), Sunrise Storm feels like she has unfinished plot to do as well, and Bob's brain will likely come in handy for fighting alien robots just as much as Jessie Middleton's.
That being said: I would have liked to have seen the Molly/Tom/Theresa plot thread tie more into the main narrative more. Sunny felt like her content could have been fleshed out a lot more. Sunny felt like there was a whole arc here about her coming to terms with leadership and it felt highly incomplete or in the background.
Also, the fact that Sha'am Maut was essentially the cause of the entire plot it was kind of out of place because she didn't even appear until after the plot was pretty much resolved; if this was the plan from the start I would have preferred her being seen and acting earlier in the story and maybe some of the behind the scenes arguing with the Dreamwardens actually shown instead just being told that it was happening. Given Billy's actions and powers it made sense for the Dreamwardens to be involved in the story and would have made no sense if they didn't show up, but I felt that they weren't implemented as they should be. This wasn't so bad for people that read Picking Up the Pieces and were familiar with them, but that accounts for about a quarter of the readers which left about 3/4s of people kind of caught off guard by them. They needed to be better integrated in at an earlier point and their limitations and abilities better defined for the average reader. It was pretty clear from the comment section how few people understood what they could and couldn't do or what their motivations were. In fact, if I was not already familiar with them from other stories I would probably be at a loss on what their motivations were just by reading Aftermath.
The art is cute. I can't say I ever had a clear image of Sunrise Storm in my head so nice to see an example, Jenny is pretty close to what I imagined her pony form as, though I had imagined her smaller than her sister--big earth pony bones strike again.
5082421
Agree for the most part.
And I still feel that the Dreamwardens have way to much power that they don't need for the role they play.
5082434
I feel more comfortable with them as of Monsters We Make. They still have a lot of power, but their vulnerabilities are displayed more and that makes them seem less cosmic horrors and more characters. Makes them less intimidating and it looks like they are part of the government as just another branch like the CIA or maybe better said interpol since they are international. Hard to call them all powerful watching as Ghadab is completely helpless and crying while basically everyone he loves and cares about are getting killed and he can't even take vengeance for it, as well as watching a psychopath threaten and mock Phobia and her family and she just has to sit there and take it because no mind magic and no dreamwalking means there's nothing she can do about it. Those oaths really do hold them in check, to the point it seems almost unfair. Just waiting to see who takes Sha'am's place now.
5082454
My opinion does not change. It should be authority only.
Thanks for keeping up with the writing! If you want to condense the number of characters down, maybe focus on plotlines, and flesh out other characters using them? If you want to include worldbuilding (which would probably work very well, if you're sticking to your 20-year plan) you might be inspired by Stand on Zanzibar, or the interludes in American Gods or Worm. Molly's sections worked well for that, I felt, even if they didn't seem to directly connect.
5082421
In retrospective, I think including Halira's stuff was probably a mistake, because it was done as a nod to Halira and not because it was fitting to the story. A lot of it felt tacked on instead of organically included. And at time I almost expect pop up telling me "Do you wan't to know more about this mysterious character? Just go read Halira's fic!".
I mean, no offence to Halira, but I was here to read Asgeek's story not their; so getting told that some part of the story I had to read someone else's fic was irritating.
And on the other hand, sometime not reading more was a good thing, I don't always need to know the detailed background of every named characters.
5083490
While I think references to Sunset Blessing and Wild Growth were appropriately handled and gave readers the information they needed I will take my share of blame for how the Dreamwardens were handled. ASGeek did consult me about a number of things with them and I should have offered more suggestions on how to better communicate the lore involved in a fashion that didn't make people have to come read a full other story. There is a lot of lore, and there was always the fear of giving a major lore dump for characters that were largely in the background. There were probably ways that could have been better done though and I will take my share of blame for not taking the time to help come up with a better solution. As was mentioned by innkeeper it wouldn't have made much sense for them not to get involved, but they could have been handled better and I apologize for not stepping up with more suggestions on that until late in the game.
On the plus side: I don't see where they need to be major players in the Devourer storyline. They may be present, but it would be in the far background more as consultants rather than active players in the plot. By the time the devourers storyline runs around they are effectively burocrats/government officials and would be acting more in that regard--sitting in meetings, reading and sending reports, helping facilitate communication, giving information about what they know concerning Devourers to scientists and whatever defense force is formed. Decisions and actions would mainly be in the hands and hooves of others so you shouldn't have to see any more manipulations or major actions from them in future ASGeek stories. I know it wouldn't even be all the same characters as there would have been a few roster changes by then. A few would be the same characters, but upwards to half the roster might be changed by then--I know at least two, perhaps three that will be turning over their jobs to others by that point and only one of those replacements is set in stone on who.
Any other characters of mine who would be involved I think would be essentially fresh characters due to the time gap between my final Riverview story and the Devourer storyline. Looking at Jessie in that, who is only 6.5 years old as of Monsters We Make and would be a grown adult by the Devourers storyline which makes her almost a completely new character coming from ASGeek, with her filly backstory key points probably able to be summed up in a
that story. paragraph or two that's easily entered into a casual conversation. I'm unsure if anyone else from my stories would really fit well into that storyline other than her. If any were the time gap would cause so much change they are essentially fresh characters as well.
I don't know ASGeek's plans on it l, so I can't be sure who is or isn't a character in it. I just know I confirmed I didn't want to write it when it came time to tell that story.
I read both stories back to back and loved every minute of it. I literally couldn't put it down to the point my wife had to snatch my phone from me so we could have dinner once. I found the number and diverseness of characters to be a plus, not a negative. one question though, is there a list of all the stories in this universe? Can't wait to see what you write next.
5217319
Just found this comment but we do have a basic timeline with all stories just missing Halira's "Starting Over" posted on the pandemic forums. All pandemic stories are listed under the groups story section.
https://www.fimfiction.net/group/212821/pandemic/thread/426657/pandemic-story-timeline