New year, and somewhat new me! · 6:24pm Dec 29th, 2015
Hey, guys. Long time, no see, right? I mean, aside from the occasional blog post or very rare story, you don’t see me as often as you’d like. I guess that’s expected, seeing how 2015 has been quite the rollercoaster for me; and I’m assuming the same for some of you guys as well. Which is why I’d like to take but a few minutes of time to explain some stuff to you guys.
I kind of chuckle to myself every now and then when I go on this site. Back in December of 2014, I thought I’d be getting 1,000 followers on this site and manage to post a 10,000 word oneshot during this year. That obviously never happened, but it doesn’t bother me.
I was too busy figuring things out to do any of that, yet it doesn’t matter.
What matters is that I want you guys to listen up. You know me by many names; The Princess Rarity, TPR, Toni, or whatever other screen names I have on any other social media you follow me on. But if any of you know me just a little bit, you’ll know that I am gay. A lesbian. Homosexual. However you wanna word it. That was a part of my identity that took me quite sometime to come to terms with.
As was another part.
For quite sometime now, I knew that I didn’t exactly belong to either side of the gender spectrum, that I didn’t feel comfortable on either side, but rather both - or a mix of them. A few months ago, I realized I was nonbinary, and I came across a new name to fit my identity because “Toni” just isn’t who I am. It’s a name that was kind of forced on me. I went through quite the list: Avery, Quillon, Delilah, et cetera, until I came across a name that fit me quite well.
Reagan. It means “royal”, it sounds both pretty and tomboyish, and just fits me, to put it simple.
My “pronouns” aka what I go by haven’t really changed. I’m still she / her, but I’d prefer they / them. I wouldn’t really be bothered by he / him, so you can call me that but … eh. Y’know.
Just like my sexuality, I’m not out to everyone. Just some close friends and my guidance counselor. So yeah. My second year of high school hasn’t been going that great, along with my home life, and I don’t wanna sound like a whiny baby here so I’ll keep it simple: 2015 has kicked my ass and handed it to me.
I’m hoping 2016 is better. I know I’ve said this multiple times, but I really am slowly but surely chipping away at the next chapter of “Predicaments in Ponyville”, going through my old notebooks to find my blueprints, and a sequel for “Silent Scream” is being toyed with here and there. I considered myself lucky to have finished “Fading (and Glowing) Lights”, despite the fact that looking back, it wasn’t that great as I thought.
Do you guys remember Cassara, my Discelestia baby? I’ve changed her and turned her into a character for original work. She’s a half-angel half-demon hybrid battling evil now! Yes, you heard right, I’m finally writing original stuff!
I know I don’t reply to messages or comments, because my depression is really starting to hit. But I’m still alive, and that’s what matters. I can make it a few more years before I turn eighteen and escape all of the negativity I’m currently surrounded by; the small town and it’s fucked up people, my screwed-up family, and so much more.
I congratulate myself, and all of you lovely people, for making it this far.
TL:DR - your Princess has gone through some shit, would like to be called Reagan now, is trying her hardest, and appreciates each and every one of you guys! <3 Kisses!
Wish I could figure myself out by the New Year.
Nah. I prefer Rares.
On a bit more serious note, does that mean you'll be looking into changing your name?
~Twi
3650139 Once I turn of age, yeah. I'm going to become Reagan Lunette. I'm starting to hate my original last name.
3650131 Hey, buddy, no one says you have to fully figure out who you are. If you're happy with the skin you're in, that's all that matters. You don't need labels, it just personally gives me comfort to know, y'know?
But good luck, with whatever you have going on.
3650148 I get it. Thanks.
3650153 If you ever need support, you should check out Jeffrey Marsh's Youtube channel. They go over some great topics and give a lot of boosts.
3650156 Jeffrey... Marsh... noted. Thanks.
I'll check it out.
Reagan, huh? I'll be ready to call an exorcist, then.
Glad to see you're keeping the fight through life's misery on and strong.
3650161 *hugs* Thanks, Raz.
3650171 *hugs back*
Congratulations! I admire People with The strenght to changes their lives! Have a happy New 2016, and keep being Awesome!
Oh, and if you don't mind, I'll call you "your highness".
3650291 *curtsies* If you wish.
Oh. Reagan, huh? Okay.
...
...can I still call you Toni, for old time's sake?
Glad to see your back, Reagan. And congratulations on figuring out yourself.^^
3650361 *kneels* Oh, indeed I believe I must, your highness.
(I'm probally going to sound stupid for asking this but anyway) what does nonbinary mean? I can't say I've heard it before.
3650372 Well, I wouldn't be offended seeing how you've known me for a while, but y'know, it's really just a matter of preference.
3650445 Don't worry, hon, it's not a stupid question! To sum it up, nonbinary means "no gender" and that I don't conform to anything. Like, I'd wanna bind my chest, but also wear skirts. Here's the official definition of it.
3650870
Thanks, that was very helpful.
I understand how cruel people could be for no reason, and you got my full support Reagan.
just keep on smiling and be around people that makes you smile and you will make it.
So Rarity, any news on what you will write next?