Oct
23rd
2015
Sorry about the delay · 4:06pm Oct 23rd, 2015
I'm not in a good way regarding my head. I'm trying to get something moving. Anything. Instead all I do is sit here. I'm waiting on licenses from Washington and Oregon. Waiting on just about everything. Everything I seem to do just makes me feel like I'm suffocating, and I don't know what to do to make it stop.
Anyway, sorry. I'll try to get more chapters of Horizons out or do something productive.
I'll fail, but I'll try.
Edit: sigh... this is all I can come up with today. What is wrong with me?
I feel you man, I'm in a similar situation ATM. Get better, sort stuff out, no worries and no hurry, we'll be here.
I think you've probably earned yourself a break at this point.
Take it easy on yourself mang!
Do you need help with anything?
~Skeeter The Lurker
I originally started reading Horizons when 33 was the newest available chapter. Guess it's about time to do it all again.
I've thanked you for writing a bunch of times Somber, but I feel compelled to repeat my broken record performance yet again: thank you. Horizons is a big part of what re-ignited the fire that is my love of reading- and that has subsequently become an inferno. That alone has carried me much further in my ambitions than I ever expected to go. I'm not done yet, and neither are you. Take a breather. You've already accomplished a lot, and yet still have a lot ahead of you.
Rock on.
If memory serves you are a teacher, & I am in a teaching program myself. I understand quite well how long that process can take as it has been made abundantly clear to me. If you need help or if you need someone to talk to we are here for you. That is an honest offer.
we're here for you if you ever need to talk.
also, if you haven't already, look into seeing a therapist -- that sounds like classic depression
My experience with depression sounds very similar to that; an inability to find the strength to do even the stuff I genuinely want to, and an invisible blanket smothering me (mine got so bad about two years ago that I ended up going on meds for it and the difference was literally night and day)
Good luck, Somber.
GGRRrr
[Take as much time as you need. If you need a break, take it.]
GGRRrr
[I would rather wait months for a long good quality chapter than a short rushed one.]
Read the notes. I'm intrigued, good sir. This is already a story I'm excited to read.
I hear you on the other matter, as well. Do what you need to do, life is for living. If you need to take a break, see a psychiatrist, roll down grassy hills while screaming Billy Holiday lyrics, you do that. But do that last one soon, all the grass is going to get covered with snow before long =P
A lack of production. All too familiar to me. You could listen to Shia Labeouf and just do it or you could listen to me and go binge play Fallout. Life will ram your head into the ground every chance it gets, but we need to keep getting up and continue to walk the road of life. Where was I going with this? Right... FALLOUT 4!
Anyway, good luck. I've been working on my thing for over a month, rewritten it 4 times, still on chapter 1, all because I always think it turns out bad. You have more experience writing. Don't worry, you'll do just fine, I'm sure of it.
I like the idea of the AI thing.
That AI thing was really cool.
Dude, that AI premise is a really great idea! Anyway, it sounds like you need a break.
Not doing what I wanna do is something I struggle with almost every day, and I have been struggling with it ever since I can remember. Of course that's not an all-encompassing explanation of what's happening, but you know that. It's to have a neverending loop running in your head that you can't stop. I'm curious to what extend we might have similar experiences on it, as everything you've said about it so far seems to line up exactly. Does it sometimes happen to you when you're just having a random thought process, like spinning around on an awesome desk chair, and you can't seem to get the chair to stop spinning in your head?
Regardless, I cannot tell you the answer to your situation, as I don't know it myself. But I can tell you two things that you might already know. Mindfulness gets you out of your head, and just doing what you wanna do is key. I know that last one hurts because "how the hell do you just do it", but if there's one thing I know, it's that attention makes things grow. If you think, you think more. You feed the loop. The loop eventually takes away the situation and focuses on yourself. In moments like these, don't think of good or bad. Think of easy. Do something that moves you. If it's putting on some music, do that. Anything. And just let everything go, just do exactly that. Listen to the music, or whatever it is. Just that. When you look back, you'll see you gained distance from the loop, and the rest is up to your conscious you.