Shooby don't · 5:29pm Sep 3rd, 2015
Duchess Seawinkle and her two ladies in waiting, Wavedancer and Sealight
Urgh, my royal queen of Ponyland, we have a serious problem involving the rivers and shipping lanes of Ponyland. The sea ponies- those annoying aquatic pests that swim through our rivers, eat our fish, and sing all hours of the day and night- are causing more and more of a problem in the waterways of the confederacy. They are slowing down boats, annoying and distracting the crews of ships, and causing general mischief around the banks of our rivers!
This trouble must be brought to a halt! If Queen Majesty wishes to allow "Duchess" Seawinkle and her little brood gunk up the waters of Dream Valley, that's her business! But we're not letting her aquatic vassals contaminate our waterways! I propose the states of the confederacy place metal mesh fences in the rivers, to deter and entangle these unwanted interlopers if they try to enter our waters. Also, boats could use bait to ensnare these unwanted creatures, where they can then be taken to Dram Valley's rainbow river and dumped in without any harm to the poor brutes. These methods will help rid us of these animals.
I urge you, as well as all of the others rulers of the Ponyland citadels, to take actions against this problem, before it grows into a full-blown epidemic that threatens the confederacy maritime commerce. Duchess Seawinkle will not listen to any of our diplomatic pleas or attempts at moderation, as she believe the waterways are hers to rule, and claiming she only answers to Majesty. I believe it is high time the confederacy taught them otherwise.
A concerned Daimyo of Hoofkaido, whose lands border on a sea pony-infested river.
I seriously hope no one is going to take this seriously. Angels Upon High this could be called a declaration of war.
-Sirocco
I can nothing but agree with Sirocco in this case. These creatures have the same right tp use the waters as we have, and practically declaring war solves nothing!
- Daffodil
3367016
3366892
Tell that to Seawinkle! her sea ponies are driving the pony captains mad!
3367025
Oh really? And WHY should we tryst you?
- Daffodil
3367025
Have they significantly delayed shipping to the point it cost the captains money, have they injured or killed someone on purpose?
-Sirocco
Minor notes:
- The famous pony Pinkie Pie lampooned this concept on her TV show on 7 Sept. 1987, by having referenced the landmark 1975 film Jaws, joking, "If it were a giant shark, I'd probably understand that Hoofkaido guy's concern a lot more than I am currently." She also imitated the motions of the shark in that film, and the participant in the sketch was Tiffany, the musical guest for that evening. Over the weekend, Tiffany, the 16-year-old American singer, hit the Top 10 on Dream Valley's and Equestria's pop charts (respectively, at #8 and #6) with a remake of Tommy James' 1968 hit "I Think We're Alone Now" on the MCA label.