Jul
28th
2015
Am I creepy? · 1:09am Jul 28th, 2015
One of my neww friends said that with all of the pms I send out, I sound like a stalker. Another yelled at me cause I said I'd always be here for them, and kep yelling because I apogising for hurtting them, instead of apologizing for making them angry at me. Another one said I was weird.
am I to clingy? I can talk less. 58 days ago I made my first friend in over six years, and I've tried to model how I act like Pinkie, but I think I got it wrong.
I've been stalked before. I don't want to make my new friends angry or anoyed or scared.
I'm sorry.
Report
Thorniestmax · 243 views
·
You're okay with me.
If you want to chat, I'm open.
Well, you do not creep me out, and I love chatting with you, I will never turn you away, I would like to be your friend
*hugs tight* it's ok you're not creepy are a stalker you're just very nice and friendly
Ye be as creepy as ye like. If it makes ye happy then so be it.
I don't feel you're creepy.
I like you just the way you are. You know, I invited one of my followers to our new group and he says.."Your constant blogging is enough, but now you're in my notifications too".
Dick.
So I said," why don't you hit that unfollow button and u never have to hear from me again."
There's some hateful people on here. I thought we were supposed to be here to help each other. Fuck the haters.
As I said over PMs I like you you're really kind and friendly
If you're creepy, what does that make me?
I've been called creepy, scary, and annoying. Hoo pony! Have I made some people angry! Ah, good times!
For what it's worth, I wish I were stalked by a sex-obsessed loli-wannabe, I'm very slow to get annoyed, and, if you're having a hard time confronting whatever you think makes you unlikable, I'm happy to ignore or pretend you're not whatever that is, even if I actually like those things.
You're also a lot of fun to message.
1. I am Livid.
Really.
2. Look. I am Not the kind of person to.. attempt to comfort or make some one feel better.
Largely because i am rather rude and somewhat Arrogant, and i just do not like to be involved in certain things.
But i can say this.
You Are not Clingy, Nor Creepy, nor a Stalker. Those do not describe you at all. Your actually very out going and caring, and generally i do in fact have a Positive opinion of you. I Like talking to you and i enjoy reading your blog posts and such. Sorry i have not been replying on some of the PMs as well. Even if i do not reflect it, or say it, I Do value your friendship and i am sure that others here do to.
maybe More so then any of the people who have been saying these things to you.
and quoting 3275000,
I just... One person, I get. Maybe they just don't like how I do things. Two people, It could be a coincidence. But three people? In one night? I just... I don't know. I... I'm so new to the whole 'friend' thing. I keep feeling like I'm gonna get it wrong.
3274999
Thank you, E-Man. I do appreciate it.
3275000
I want to be yours as well, Poetry. I'm trying very hard not to mess up.
3275004
*hugs back* I try to be friendly. Maybe I'm too friendly? Like a dog that won't stop licking your face until you push it away? I don't want my friends to push me away. Do I come on too strong? For example, if you had responded to my cuddle message positively, I would have sent the second half of my 'friendship intro' I came up with:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
s6.postimg.org/sz3kah68x/Love_Drop_v2_1_YAY.png
YAY! I'm Max! How do you prefer I address you?
I try to send out daily messages to my friends, to let them know that there is always someone there for them. (I don't always make it daily, but I try.) If you decide you don't want me to do this with you, please let me know, and I will stop (with no love lost at all).
Is it too needy? To intrusive? maybe I shouldn't ask for what people prefer I call them. I thought it adds a nice, personal touch, but maybe I'm just prying and sounding creepy?
But I don't want to be creepy, Pan. Or bland. or generic. or sexless.
Thank you for that, Scoots96. I guess I just... have an easier time believing people hate me than like me.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It made one of my new friends mad, and s/he started yelling at me.
3275019
3275029
Thank you, Archy. I love sending them. They brighten up my day. But I don't want to send them if they darken someone else's day. I never, ever want my happiness to be at the expense of another's.
3275035
Thank you, jumbled.
3275042
*hugs* Thank you, Karen.
3275077
Yes, you did.
3275192
Oh, HUD! *HUGS CRYING* That was beautiful. OH, his vaoice is so sothing, and the message, aned Thnk you! Thank you! This is a beutif song.
3275278
:nuzzle: You arn't creepy, Elric. You, Karen, Nav, FPony and Pan have gotten me through some of the toughest times I have faced in the last 2 months. Thank you so much for being you.
3275283
Thank you, Techy. *hugs* You are awesome.
I just... want to make everybody happy. I'm trying. I really am. Thank you all for your kind words.
3275421 *hugs tighter* i would never push you away for that and sorry for not reply
3275421 Who's a silly Max? Ye be worryin' over nothin'. Ye be scari'n folk who ain't never had a friend, I kin tell ye that much.
3275338
But, I don't know what made me unlikeable, FPony. I want to be likable. I want to be liked.
3275417
Thank you, SGP. I send out the DFMs because I care for all of my friends. I actually care for everybody. Even the people I get super angery at, and, well, sometimes entertain thoughts of them being hurt, I don't actually want them to be hurt. Even the people who tried to kill me. I want everybody to be happy, and it hurts so much that there are people that are hurt, frightened or angered by my attempts to make them happy. You don't have to reply to every PM. I send them s-so people know... well, because I want to be here for all my friends. Which... apparently makes people angry. I don't understand why saying that makes people angry, and when I asked why, I got yelled at. alot. And told that I'd already been told why. I... must have missed it. I re-read it over and over, but I still didn't get it. I still don't understand.
I truly value each and every friendship I have made in these past 58 days.
3275443 So, uh... you d-do want to be my friend?
3275454 Uh... what? I've... I've had friends before. I kinda... most of them hate me now, but I've had them before... I'm just... out of practice. Not that I was ever good at making and keeping friends before, but I did have them once.
3275483 If they truly hate a lass as fair as ye, they don't be deservin' a friend as sweet as ye be to us.
3275477 *hugs tight* yes and mabye more
3275491 Thank you, Pan. But those that do are right to hate me. I have ruined lives. I will spend the rest of my life trying to be better than I was.
3275592 Aye, we all have made mistakes. Ye have to learn to better ye self and become a better self than ye were before.
3275506 Hurray.
So... well, I'm Max. Would... would you mind if I asked how you p-prefer I address you?
Normally, I um, I try to send out daily messages to my friends. (I don't... I don't always make it daily, but I do try.) I would stop the instant you tell me you don't want me to, and I won't be hurt at all If you decide you don't want me to do this with you. Do... do you mind if I send you a friendship message each day?
Al-also. I can totally be friends, but... I cant... I can't be romantically involved with anybody online. Even if I wasn't already sort-of in a relationship. I don't think I'll ever get over my issues with putting myself out there. I might, but probably not. I'm sorry.
3275613 not i would love that also thank you for telling me that but i was talking about best friends
3275597 Ah am better than I was. I rarely leave the house, except to screw, donate or shop. when I am feeling Lex, I don't talk to people. I make sure that all of my interactions are safe, and do not run the risk of hurting anybody. I am a better person than I once was. that is the one good thing I can say about it.
3275619 Oh! *Hugs* We might totally become best friends! Well, eventually!
How you prefer I address you? (if you don't mind my asking)
3275635 *hugs tighter* i hope so also i have many name princess pancake pony nightmare princess pancake pony ppp pancake pony are pancake call me whatever
3275421
(Wipes your eyes and hugs you back)
You're welcome.
3275644 Ooh! Can I call you Threep? (3P=ThreeP) It sounds really cute!
3275660 *rests head against you* Thank you, Hud. You, and everypony here. You are all... so nice. so very, very nice. Thank you. Thank you all.
3275700
sure
3275708
(Keeps hugging)
3275709 Well, Threep, it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance.
3275730 the pleasure is all mine my dear mare
i744.photobucket.com/albums/xx81/mazeedt/gazfd1cc.png
3275720 Thank you.
3275738
3275747
You're welcome.
3275989
3275472
It's good generally to be liked and likable, but not always.
Your worth is independent of how much you're liked or, even, how much you like yourself. Your worth is something that's yours intrinsically and divinely, whether or not you've made terrible mistakes or recognize that worth yourself yet.
There are many times it's good to be hated, feared, annoying, or creepy, and not just because some people mistake the worth or intentions of a person. Sometimes people need to feel angry or scared or creeped out or annoyed in response to completely innocent things. If you're wise and strong you can love them through whatever their challenge might be, even when they blame you. When you focus on whether or not you're liked or a good person, you risk invalidating the feelings of those who either like or dislike you and help neither yourself nor them.
It seems like you genuinely love people. Perfect your love, and you won't be afraid.
Ps. Sweetie... If anyone tells you different, tell them to unfollow you, you don't want that in your life
3276348 well said, my friend.
3276348 I am having a hard time understand this, so i am going to break it down, and examin how I feel about each part.
I'm not sure how I feel about this, but the next part seems to elaborate, so I'll reserve judgement for now.
I agree with this. Just because I've made terrible mistakes, doesn't mean I am worthless. Although I like to be degraded, I am able to separate this from my feelings of self-worth.
I'm not sure how this makes any sense. When is it ever good to be hated? aside from Halloween, When is it good to be feared, or creepy? At what times has it ever been good that someone was annoying?
I suppose... I understand this, put this way. I certainly react in very negative ways to innocuous stimuli, and
cannotshould not begrudge other people doing the same.I don't know if I am that wise, or strong. I can try to be, though.
I thoroughly understand this. I want to point out that I don't do what I do because I want to be liked, I do what I do because I want people to be happy. My wanting to be liked is a separate issue, and I would prefer people be happy, even if it meant they didn't like me. My main goal is peoples happiness, within the limits of my abilities.
I do. I really do.
... I don't know if I agree with this, but perfecting love is a good goal regardless. I ever endeavor to do so.
3276386 I don't have to be friends with all of my followers. So long as they are not being actively unfriendly, I have no problem with them choosing to follow me without being my friend (although I have no idea why they would).
3277487 Ok...good attitude. Everyone likes you, girl. so just be yourself. We were all worried when you left!! WE really, really like you, you brighten up ALOT of people's day., including mine.
3277811 Aw, Karen!
37.media.tumblr.com/9bee7cbfa59e89a52d8e964cde259b0a/tumblr_n6w0qfbjsF1rcsx3uo7_r1_500.gif
3277410
Simple gestures like explaining yourself are the reason you come across as very polite, and I know that this takes effort, even for those to whom it comes second nature. This is one of many reasons you ought to like yourself and certainly a reason I like you. I don't mean to draw undue attention to a small thing, but, in light of your worry, I felt it was worth mentioning.
You acknowledge that you're not worthless despite your mistakes, but that isn't the same as understanding that your worth is independent of any mistakes you've made.
I'll speak for myself here, now, to avoid assuming anything more than necessary about you, and I hope that these personal insights might answer some of your concerns.
My mistakes affect how I see and define myself, but they'll never impact how I'm seen of God as long as I keep trying to do what's right, no matter what, in every situation. I kind of suck at this as far as sexual behavior goes, so I worry about my ultimate value to him. Arrogance and fear on my part lead me to rationalize playing with fire in ways that would have caused me to lose what's most precious to me if not for many miracles on my behalf. I can't give up trying to rid myself of my thorns after I've been given so many chances and considering how much love I might spread without fear.
The example I think of often is a parent making their kid brush their teeth when they don't want to. Anybody with something important to say to the public necessarily forces their way into the spotlight, and many who hear may misunderstand or become unsettled by the messenger despite the efforts of the person to come across with care and concern. Misunderstanding and pride are a step away from fear and anger, both of which happen all the time in normal, everyday, social interactions. My own care for others has been misunderstood by those who aren't used to the way I show it or who misunderstand my intentions, so I empathize with you in that regard.
'Creepy,' in my experience, depends entirely on how a person is raised. In Europe, I've lived among cultures where smiling at acquaintances and strangers is semi-suggestive and people wonder whether you mean that you're up to something or know something about them if you do smile, no matter how innocently. While it's good to try to be aware of how we come across, it's simply impossible to control sometimes.
It's good to be your caring self as best you can, even if somebody doesn't understand your intentions. If they say something, then, sure, go ahead and change your approach, but don't let how they were raised spoil good things with others in the future.
I admire and respect that you place the happiness of others before being liked yourself. My personal challenge is forgiving others for lasting grudges they seem to hold against me despite my efforts.
If you love a person absolutely, is there anything you wouldn't do within reason/wisely to give them a happy life? If saving them meant confronting your worst fears, is there any fear you wouldn't stare down as if it were nothing to you? It takes real love to keep going despite hate, grudges, and fear.
Being inadequate to meet the needs or standards of others to be liked or make them happy is hard on me and others as well. You're not alone. Don't fear your own inadequacy. Stare it down because you know you've done what you've done because you love people.
I do try. I explain myself because I get confused easily, and my thoughts confuse others, so... so I explain myself...
I do like me. I don't like some things about me, but I like me as the total package.
God made me, and I am a sex toy. I refuse to believe He made me without the intent that I be used.
Since I got better, I have never had to wonder if my Lord loves me. It was everyone else I wondered about, save Tom.
I still don't think it is ever good to be truly feared. While it may be effective for an authority figure to be feared, I don't thing it is good.
Absolutely nothing. Although it would end me, I would face my deepest fears for him.
Thank you, 3281864, for being you.
3449415
Thank you, in return, for being so accepting of me, and sorry-not-sorry for the incoming wall of text.
God's will in sexual matters is not something I think I'm well informed of by Him, but I do know that I sin for lusting after what God, in present circumstances, hasn't given to me. I believe He made me, and I love sex obsessively, but I don't presume that I ought to obsess over sex as I do. I believe that He gives his children weaknesses so that we'll be humble and, if we seek to change for the better, to become perfected in Christ through faith that His grace is sufficient after doing all we can to obey His commandments and heed his counsel.
Repentance for sexual sin is one of the most painful spiritual experiences I know, and withdrawal from my lifelong addiction to selfish sexual behavior has been beyond my ability to endure alone. I have desires that I know would destroy me if fulfilled, but to relinquish my hold on those desires feels as though it would also destroy me. My spirit is willing, and part of me sincerely believes that, despite how immensely appealing certain fantasies or lifestyles seem, God has something so much better for me that, if I understood the smallest part of His reward, I'd never be tempted at all to sin ever again. The flesh is weak, however, and I'm mostly blind to the eternal outcome of my actions. I arrogantly presume that who/what I want to be here and now is worth giving any thought next to what God would make of me and the happiness and eternal pleasure of His ultimate reward.
It would be nice to have what I want sexually and also have what God would give me. My crisis of faith is that I'm not able to let go of the notion that this is possible. I think to myself, maybe God wants me to fulfill some greater part of my sexual desires, no matter how dangerous it seems. If I were to ask an ecclesiastical leader what to do, the answer seems painfully predictable: abandon the desire. Yet I don't believe I can do that alone, and I've been too afraid and too arrogant to search earnestly for experienced help.
The thought has occurred to me often that if I were married to a woman whose fantasies are compatible with mine, we could satisfy each other and meet the divine standard of matrimony. This is probably a pipe dream, but, for better or worse, one I haven't given up on.
3449883 I appreciate your view on this, and wish you luck in your endeavors, but I do not believe my sexuality is wrong. I believe our interpretation of God's will on sexuality is wrong. I am lovingly, and carefully, crafted for my purpose in life. Although I have my flaws, everything I am was designed toward my purpose. I cannot believe I am not supposed to fulfill that purpose.
3449928
Glad I could offer my perspective!
3449973 :nuzzle: