I did this thing. · 8:00pm May 30th, 2014
I write like Vladimir Nabokov. Proof: http://iwl.me/s/c3e0655f
Analyze your writing.
Don't know what to think of that.
Time to cite numbers as vague allusions to sexual aggression, I guess.
Or learn Russian.
*
I actually started, after a long hiatus (producing income-generating words), writing Source again. The unabashed joy I feel at getting back to it reminds me of why I ended up in this imminently creative fandom, and writing in this horse-filled sandbox, in the first place. It's a rich plenum; black velvet textured earth. The dirtiest dirt in the entire dirt world.
Also, I'm going to post some of my articles from Writer's Digest on here as a concise reference for brony authors. Maybe I'll rework them to be a bit more equine-relevant (and avoid copyright, since I like money, ponies, and staying out of court all at the same time).
Before I start giving anyone pony writing advice, though, I should probably write something pony. Right.
Makes sense.
I also did that thing.
I submitted samples of three different stories (not clopfics, mind you!)
Each time, I got back that I write like a different author of erotic novels.
>lolita
heheheh
Successive works:
Gertrude Stein - Onus
I like how it lists F. Scott Fitz's and Hemingway's as her books.
J. K. Rowling - Onus - Funeral Fit for a Queen (WIP)
William Shakespeare - Remnants - Quiescence (WIP)
Arthur C. Clarke - Remnants - Chapter 1 (WIP)
The password is r1temor3r4zzl3. It's a fun toy, but it's way inconsistent. All put together it says Gertrude Stein; it might truncate output. I suppose good has come out of it, though, in that it's piqued my interest in my old fiction again.
Looking at you, 2072063
2163882
It has to either truncate or sample based on a variable, though it consistently spits back Nabokov when faced with the consolidated verbiage of Source or the first five chapters of both my novels. I'm trying to figure out which words are particularly Nabokovian.
When I try the chapters individually I either get Arthur C. Clarke or... shoot me... Dan Brown.
Though I was one of the editors for Inferno. It may just be telling me I write like me. I hope. Don't tell Dan I said that.
2163845
I'm sure "blush" and any synonym for lip chewing will get you E. L. James.
How often do you opt for the words "bosom", "quiver", and "member"?
2164277
You were an editor for Dan Brown?!
*dies*
2164731
I work for Random House, more specifically Bantam. The man has twenty editors. Taking that into account, it becomes a less and less impressive 'accomplishment'.
I'm just a vernacular haberdasher on a journeyman's belletristic journey; a man playing with words. Nothing more.
2164758
How did you get an industry job?
*crawls up to you*
*curls around your feet*
2163882
The Pony that Never Was - J.D. Salinger
The Seasons - Arthur Clarke
From the Eternal Love of a Sister - J.R.R. Tolkien
Containment is Magic (Chapter 6) - J.R.R. Tolkien
Something I haven't published yet - H.P. Lovecraft
Something else I haven't published yet - Arthur Clarke
My poem - William Shakespeare
I am thoroughly convinced that this thing doesn't know one bit about how I write.
... Oh, was there something you needed?
2164763
I tried.
Okay. To boil down my resume; I wrote a hundred stories, four of which made it in to magazines; two won minor prizes. I got better. I conned a few publications into buying my words in the form of articles I was half-qualified to write. I got better.
I finally reached a point where I could put the whiz-bang-pow parts behind framing and theme, at which point I was almost thirty. I killed my interview with Writer's Digest; ended up on their staff for three years; got better. A friend keyed me in that Random House was looking for editors. Let me tell you, friendship isn't just magic, it's job opportunities.
I parlayed what little street cred I had and strong-armed my way through the door. I've always been good at job interviews. I just stare at the HR rep like I want to eat them. It works.
I got better (I think).
The rest is recent history.
*
2164825
That's enough to pique my interest. Salinger was a consummate writer, an accomplishment he celebrated by never being seen or heard from again.
2164825
Well, you did say you want me to write more, so leave feedback if you want? I mean, sooper secret unpublished content that I gave the password to in a public forum? I'd be on that shit in a heartbeat.
*clicky fingergun noises*
Also, I'm not sure it's a compliment to say you write like Lovecraft; his work is dense as hell.
2164865
I guess I'd best just pick my ass up and get to work.
There should be pony literary magazines. I'd be much more incentivized to write fanfic if I had the chance of being paid for it.