Well, you Wanted an Epilogue... · 3:15am May 21st, 2012
I think I've figured out why some of the readers 100% happy with the ending of "The Incredibly Dense Mind of Rainbow Dash." It's all caused by the Mass Effect references poisoning the story with the bad-ending-ness of ME 3.
I know how to fix this:
Epilogue:
Before I could even start figuring out what to do about the fact that my best friend was kissing me, I felt myself being yanked away by some sort of…force.
Next thing I knew, I was standing on top of one of the open towers and Canterlot castle. Then, some sort of weird ghost-filly popped up out of the floor.”
“Rainbow Dash,” the ghost filly greeted me. “You have a choice to make.”
“Um – what the hay is going on here?”
“You must choose to perform a red Sonic Rainboom, a green Sonic Rainboom, or a blue Sonic Rainboom.”
“Why?”
“Because you must.”
Well, that was a dumb answer. “So what difference does it make what color my Sonic Rainboom is? Hay, a Sonic Rainboom is all the colors of the tainbow anyway, so how could make one that’s a single color?”
“Your arrival at this place has provided you with new options,” the ghost-filly declared.
“So I can make single-colored Sonic Rainbooms now?”
“Yes, as long as that color is red, green, or blue.”
“That doesn’t make any sense.” The ghost-filly just continued staring at me blankly. “So what difference does it make what color of Rainboom I create, anyway?”
“It makes absolutely no difference, aside from color the Rainboom itself will be.”
Okay, this was getting dumb. “So what if I don’t do a Rainboom at all? Or what if I make a purple one?”
“You can’t,” the ghost-filly insisted. “Your only choices are red, green, and blue.”
“Y’know what? Go feather yourself.” I flapped my wings and dove off of the tower. There was a pink pony who, now that I thought about it, was a pretty darn good kisser waiting for me back in Ponyville.
“Wait!” The ghost-filly called out after me. “You can't leave yet! I haven’t told you about how I created the changelings, and told them to kill all of the ponies in order to keep ponies from getting killed by evil love-eating monsters!”
The End
Seriously though, the actual followup story is coming along nicely. Cloud Kicker is fun to write.
OK that was funny.
See, ghost pony? That's why you should never bury the lead.
>told them to to all the kill ponies
LOLWHAT?
Yo dawg, I heard you don't wanna be killed by synthetics, so I made some synthetics to kill you every 50 thousand years so you won't be killed by synthetics.
126019
Oops. That's what I get for writing something on a whim in 5 minutes, and not proof-reading it. Why is there no way to edit blog posts?
Still better than the actual ME3 ending
Nice one
Hey,
Remember, CK is the main character. You're supposed to be making her suffer - her problems being our hilarity, of course. Unless Blossomforth is secretly the main character, in which case... (actually, I've no idea what that implies).
JMH
Good lord is this genius. I think i'm actually crying a little.
I tip my hat to you. Excellently played.
126049
The solution to that conundrum is just to make all your characters suffer constantly. Then you don't have to worry who the main character is!
Funny stuff there. Though it does make me epically sad and frustrated that Mass Effect is going to be forever affiliated with the most dissapointing ending in video game history. I'm not even exageratting. For me, Mass Effect 3 had the most dissapointing ending of any video game, movie, book, or TV show. I still have trouble wrapping my mind about how the final ten minutes of a game could taint a 100 hour experience.
At least Rainbow Dash got to make a real decision to make herself happy. Funny post overall.
126037
You actually can edit blog posts. Go to "Chengar Qordath -> Blog" and click the little pencil icon next to the blog post you want to edit.
126178
Much obliged.
i actually liked the gamer poop refence......
i have nothing else to say, so here's spike wearing a robe and looking at rarity's ass
i.imgur.com/pp9NH.jpg
"oh yes, this is rather my best work!"
Still a better ending than Mass Effect 3
Win!
You should post this as an actual chapter so more people would read it.
lmao godlike