• Member Since 28th Aug, 2012
  • offline last seen Jan 1st, 2017


Admin of Straight Shipping and SpikeDash among others. I write half-stories.

More Blog Posts85

  • 314 weeks
    A Commission

    I'm a little late with this one, but I'd just like to direct anyone interested to a little SpikeDash I had commissioned. You can find a link to that right here.


    Spike grew up -- a little more than Dash ever expected, it seems.

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    3 comments · 569 views
  • 314 weeks
    Win some dolla - enter the SpikeDash competition!

    I wouldn't normally post a blog like this before I come back to the site, but my good friend, YourNeighborhoodAlicorn, is organizing a competition over in the SpikeDash group. Given that the last few competitions have been nothing but talk, I've decided to have a monetary prize. Furthermore,

    Read More

    16 comments · 386 views
  • 331 weeks
    Running out of fucks to give

    [03:30:30] luv maiden: are you online?
    [03:31:03] *** Tom (Vexy) has shared contact details with luv maiden. ***
    [03:31:10] Tom (Vexy): You better be a sexy robot seducing me with cam
    [03:31:25] luv maiden: hey.., how are u?
    [03:31:30] Tom (Vexy): yes!
    [03:31:34] Tom (Vexy): I knew it!
    [03:31:54] luv maiden: well im trying out thongs, you sound cute lets have sum fun...

    Read More

    13 comments · 615 views
  • 338 weeks
    Dragon Breeding

    The Birds and the Bees

    This made me laugh. I hope it makes you giggle a little as well. :pinkiesmile:

    4 comments · 726 views
  • 341 weeks

    It had been my original plan to attempt Oneshotober this year. I had enough oneshot ideas to feel confident enough to write at least a few of them within the month. But after reading one of Rainbowbob's recent blogposts, I've come to realize that I don't want to do that anymore. Instead, I want to attempt something

    Read More

    4 comments · 611 views

Darling Conundrum Followup + Reading on Youtube (So click this and go watch it!) · 4:59pm Jan 5th, 2014

Twilight Sparkle and the 'Darling' Conundrum...

When I write fics, I usually pour a hell of a lot of thought into them. Compared to my other ideas, however, this fic is remarkably shallow, and it's rather unsurprising to see why. The idea was thought up during a skype conversation with Mr101 because we were discussing how people tend to overcharacterize Rarity by making her use phrases such as 'darling' and 'simply' far more often than one would realistically say in natural conversation, and that meant that the conversation quickly dries up and feels very wooden and contrived to the reader.

So I was surprised, then, when this was so popular. I wrote this while sleep deprived by well over a day, and literally put very little thought into it. I published it after coming back from a party before crashing, so I've no idea how long it was dancing in and out of that Popular Stories box. Despite this, it somehow accumulated more than 100 upvotes before getting a single downvote, and is now sitting at a ~50:1 ratio with almost as many views as there are words. I'm baffled, yes. This isn't something I'd ever see as being remotely popular, let alone my most popular work bar Spike's Crusade. In fact, one could say that it's more popular than Spike's Crusade because, unlike Spike's Crusade, it got its own reading by thisisausername2004. I recommend giving that a watch because he discusses the fic a little at the end.

So really, what am I trying to say with this fic? Well, this fic is really a sort of exaggerated deconstruction fic. First of all, there's the business of Twilight's spell. It's a ridiculously overused trope that Twilight would cast a spell and suddenly everything goes wrong. Cue conflict. Cue plot. Cue everything. Rather than it being a series of unfortunate events that caused the situation in the fic to occur, it instead relies exclusively on Twilight's misdemeanor and nothing else. How reflective of this in the show? There's actually very few instances of Twilight's magic messing up, and in fact Twilight has shown herself to be very adept at what she practices in. Of course, despite this, it's still a good and fun trope to make use of. Who doesn't mess up a magic spell every now and then? This fic took Twilight messing up the spell to the extreme, as it does with just about everything.

As I mentioned above, the whole thing makes a mockery of all the authors who characterize Rarity by making her say 'darling' and 'simply' far too much. I have actually read a fic where Rarity said 'darling' twice in a single sentence. Applejack doesn't really say Sugarcube a lot, so she was only really there to reinforce the problem. (and to hint at RariJack...) Rainbow Dash, however, crashed into the library and shouted out "Twenty percent cooler", which is obviously not something she'd normally say, but that's exactly the point—she said that once, and yet despite this, the 20% cooler meme is enormously popular. It was a dig at the seemingly random popularity of the meme among the community... and Twilight's reaction is pretty much my own.

Finally, what did the spell actually do? Well, admittedly it did warp and alter in my head as I wrote it, but I really felt that this line was the hint:

Why is Rarity acting so...

Twilight searched for the right word.


Try contrasting that to the show where all the characters shrug off Pinkie's antics as "it's just Pinkie Pie being Pinkie". Here it's simply Rarity being Rarity. The spell originally took the extreme overcharacterization of Pinkie and instead reversed it so that all the other characters to vastly overcharacterized. In the end, however, it was simply Rarity saying 'simply' and 'darling' far more often than is necessary or even realistic.

In contrast to my other works, particularly what I'm currently writing, this is horrifically shallow in retrospect. I spouted 1400 words on very little story. I don't think I have any doubt that my next fic will be of better quality. Whether it'll be as well-received as this one remains to be seen.

Thanks for reading. :moustache:

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Comments ( 16 )

I was already expecting to see you having mixed feelings about this one becoming so popular. :eeyup:

As far as I know you, you tend to lean over writing more serious, in-depth fics, instead of light-hearted, like this one, or pure clop, like I see Spike's Crusade.

Nonetheless, I celebrate your success! :pinkiehappy:

It's an amazing form of observing how absurdly over the top some authors can go just to try to leave the character 'in-character', and rely in catchphrases instead of observing the psychological aspects that makes Rarity be Rarity. I know we have like, three episodes that highlight her, but that's just a lazy excuse to not make your field research, and have a believable characterization.

She's not even the hardest one to write... :duck:

Anyway, congratulations again! I hope you keep bringing us awesome stories, my old friend, be the serious, in-depth ones, or light-hearted comedies like this one! :rainbowlaugh:

I don't see what you mean. Twilight fails spells all the time. The parasprites. Love it, Need it. Flutterbat. Need I go on? She is very good at magic, but I think magic is like a genie with a bad attitude. It'll give you everything, including the fine print.

I'm surprised that he didn't pick up on the fact that your story is making fun of people having Rarity say Darling too much. I mean it's kind of obvious from your title.


There are also plenty of examples where Twilight has used magic without complete disaster, and if you were to compare them, then you would find many more instances in which Twilight has shown she is a capable magic user, as opposed to when she's destroyed half of Ponyville.

However, I wasn't really addressing that in my fic. What I was suggesting is that that is often all that authors rely on to instigate the problems in the fic.


The title implies that pretty heavily. I'm sure it would have been a redundant observation to make, regardless of the validity. :rainbowlaugh:


Although a lot of what I write (and no one else has really seen, dear prereader) is serious, I do have a few comedy ideas hiding up in here in my noggin. :raritywink:

Just give them time and they'll come out and play, just like this one did.

I'm guessing he didn't read that many fanfics where Rarity says Darling way too often in conversations.


Actually other than those few instances Twilight hasn't messed up her spell work in the show. Teleportation (aka, highly precise, horrible consequnces if it goes wrong spell) she does constantly. When she's to lazy to walk somewhere, when she has somewhere she wants to be, just for lols. She does it with ease.

The Time Travel Spell. AKA another spell that could go horrily wrong, she did perfectly. Sure she could have organized her approach better, but she created a stable time loop because she didn't. And she still did it right.

The Ursa Minor. OMC! There were tons of spells she merged, mixed, and used simutaneously. Along with the mustache spell.

The Orange Transformation spell. Sure she missed with that, but being distracted durring a crucial moment will do that to you. And we did get to see a merger of flora and fauna.

So no she doesn't do it all the time. But everypony every now in then rolls a critical faliure in the game of life. It's just as possible as getting a critical 20, but polar opposite in the end effect.


I concede that the failures aren't as frequent as I implied, but catastrophic spell failures do cause some crazy problems!


Ain't that the truth. Especially rolling a critical fail scales with the pony in question. In Twilight's case, with power equal to or greater than Star Swirl the Bearded [aka. Haxy McHaxypants] (pre-Alicornation), her failiures are the things of legends.


...or a Saturday morning girls cartoon. :rainbowwild:


:rainbowlaugh: even then, her failiures beat down any other girls tv show. Heck even most boy's cartoons can't match Twilight's occassional failiures.


True, Twilight's mishaps are pretty spectacular... makes me wonder what would happen if the likes of Celestia botched a spell. :twilightoops:


That's it. Tonight I'm making a satire. Thanks in part to our little back and forth and to 1702549. Both of you are getting shout outs. Of course I was mildly musing this earlier, thanks to this fic (well a satire on Vexy's SatirE), but Celestia botching a spell. Or spells. Will be utterly delicious to create.


Alright. This I gotta see. Shoot me a link when it's done! :pinkiehappy:


I'm not gonna lie, this sounds like it's going to be good. :raritystarry: Please do send us a link when you're done, TheGreatEater. I can even give it a proofread tomorrow if you'd like?


This so far has actually grown beyond the original joke.

You know how you Vexy, made this as a Satirical Joke, on satires on how Twilight miscasts a spell. And that's the entire plot device of the story?

Well Talguy21's Celestia bit got me started and it's grown a bit. You know how there are tons of stories about how Twilight [who's a scientist, and good at chemistry] can't cook? And all of her cooking is an abomination?

Or her dancing / musical ability is the thing of horrors?

Well it's said that a student is a reflection of their teacher. So I'm going to have Celestia visit her schools as a guest student (since in Fanon she has a few). Then I'm taking Talguy's "What happens when Celestia fails?" And taking it up to 11. Along with some messed up spells.

Next chapter will be dancing at her music academy (where Tavi and Vinyl go in some fanfics), possibly music (that summons a god of undeath).

Mechanics (with all the little things Twilight builds, and the psycho tech of doom. Celestia accidentally building a death ray and making a picture on the moon would be amazing.)

Finally. What the things all been building up to. Celesita going to "Celestia's School For Gifted Unicorns".

Ending with an epilogue. But yeah if you guys want to proof read. I can link the Gdocs to you guys. Just PM me an email to link to. Oh! And thanks to both of you guys. You really stirred a spark for this fic, and I'll be linking you in the Long Description as a shout out.


Hey, I'm just glad I'm contributing to the fanfiction scene for once. :rainbowwild:

That does sound like an absurdly amusing premise... If I were to name it, it'd be 'Like Student, Like Teacher'. :pinkiehappy:

As for proofreading... I could, and if you really want to, just send the link via a PM here, but I usually prefer to see the finished product. Either way is cool, though.

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