Dear Starlight Glimmer:
From this moment on, all ponies you choose to befriend must be on the List of Approved Friendly Ponies. No exceptions. Any attempts to defy this rule shall be punished in the most humiliating and sexy ways imaginable.
Your super sexy teacher, Princess Twilight Sparkle.
Dear Twilight:
Let's be honest: we both know that Starlight Glimmer is way sexier than you.
Sincerely, The Great and Powerful Trixie.
Dear Diary:
Trixie tried to recruit me and Snips for an awesome trick with a big fluffy cat! Unfortunately, Snips said no. I have no idea why. That cat is so fluffy!
~Snails
Dear Trixie:
Please help me! The great purple demon wishes to destroy me!
Your little creation, The Great and Shiny Sporksie.
Dear Diary:
I have just had the most indescribably strange urge to articulate my thoughts into verbal form ever since the Psychopathic Princess's pathetic pink pupil powerfully possessed my particular perceptive processes and permuted my prose...
HELP!!!
~Big Mac
Dear Trixie:
I despise your human counterpart, and I also despise your best friend for her attempt to usurp the position that is rightfully mine. That being said, I also resent Twilight for dropping me like a bar of prison soap (knowing her, she dropped it on purpose). Therefore, I shall join your team and help to overthrow the Lavender Menace.
Sincerely, Sunset Shimmer.
P.S.: I shall also be bringing along a pair of dragons, who also wish to get revenge for almost having them mutilated (long story).
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I got that reference
Aha, so Spike and Ember got through to Sunset after all. Good!
My dearest Mistress Princess Twilight Sparkle,
Thank you for the raise in my cleaning budget. Unfortunately, while I am in Canterlot cleaning Celestia's castle with the two best cleaning products ever, bleach and ammonia, I will not be able to fulfill my duties in your castle. Hopefully, I set the timers correctly and should be able to get out before the real cleansing begins. If I somehow end up dying, which, when it comes to mixing bleach and ammonia is a real possibility, I may be a couple days late coming back. But when I do come back, I promise to be twice as attentive to your needs.
Signed your loyal slave and industrial cleaner,
Neko Majin C.
~KBO.
I don't get the third and fourth ones.
Oh well. At least Sunset doesn't hate pony Trixie. How is she sending a letter to them anyway? The journal?