Today, for our inaugural episode of Super Trampoline's Super Bad Fanfic Theater, I read the deliciously horrible and mercifully short " A small part of me wants to kill you", written by the extremely untalented FimFictionWriter012. Here is the author's story description:

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Oh hey, look what finally updated after seven-and-a-half months of inactivity!

Dash 'n Scoots and the Wrath of the Twilight Princess

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Hello there, my name is Super Trampoline, and I'm a bat pony. Since I am not a very good visual artist, I am giving you money to draw me. Here are some references.

Let's start with the main one: the good old General Zoi's pony creator:

And me with a Christmas hat, if you're feeling charitable:

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My entry for the Horse News ‪#‎PantyHorse‬ swimsuit and lingerie contest!

Hey Super Trampers! (I'm calling my loyal followers that now.) I have a weekend away from the Internet coming up. What sort of horsewords or horseword accessories would you like to see me work on in the peaceful embrace of nature?"

Possible ideas include:
-EFNW Followup
-That White Space sequel
-any one of the dozen or so incomplete stories I have sitting around
-those story reviews (I'm about halfway through)
-Austraeohaiku
-???

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"Weird Al" Yankovic is a Cunning Linguist. If you haven't watched his beautiful parody of Robin Thicke's song "Blurred Lines", what are you waiting for, it's brilliant! As an English tutor, I can especially commiserate with the complaints expressed within.

You've probably seen this on my profile page:

The sequel to White Space is coming July 6th, and it's HEAVY.

To love a changeling is one thing. But to love your husband's killer? That's pushing it.

My name is Sandy Shoreline, and I'm married to a monster.

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The prophet has deemed it so. Now, for the first time in forever, I shall worship the TRUE pony goddess!

EDIT: Flint Pearce hacks again!

It was not a beautiful day. It was raining. Hard. The grey clouds blotted out the sun and poured water down upon Applejack. Standing in the muddy grass, the mare was bucking apples as usual. But why now? Why was she not cuddled up with a loved one indoors, a softly glowing fire in the hearth?

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How to Find Your Favorite Bat Pony at EFNW:
--Bat Ears
--Colorful green orange yellow and black beanie
--Blue and white mop-head tail
--Blue EFNW staff shirt
--Bright smile, cheerful demeanor, helpful attitude, and boisterous energy.
--Will be behind the soundboard on most Fanfiction panels.
--Will be dancing like a maniac at PonyStock