Hey Diddle Diddle, A Visit From Fiddle

by Metool Bard

Reversed Routine

When Octavia and Fiddlesticks returned to the apartment, everything was pitch black. However, neither sister seemed to care all that much. They were both too busy laughing.

"Sh-sho then Half Baked shtartsh hittin' on me again. Told me Ah wash the purdiest mare at the whole reunion," said Fiddlesticks as she stumbled into the apartment. "Now, thish here washn't anythin' new or nuttin', but thish time he wash gettin' a bit fresh. Askin' me what Ah wash doin' after the party, and sheein' if Ah wash intereshted in joinin' him fer a private convershation in the barn. He'sh alwaysh like that after a few chiders."

"Oh dear," said Octavia. "Wh-what did you do?"

"Well, Ah dechided to have a bit o'fun wit 'im," Fiddlesticks said mischievously. "Ah asked him if he wanted a taesht of mah pie. Y'know, all shexshy like. Now, bein' an Apple, he could've sheen right through me and left me alone. But y'know what they shay. Shometimesh, a shtallion thinksh with hish other head when he really shouldn't. Sho like a dope, he takesh me up on mah offer, and Ah grabbed thish apple pie Old Mare Appleshauche brought fer the reunion and shmashed it right into hish fache!"

Octavia degenerated into a fit of giggles, even though this wasn't typically her kind of humor. "Th-that'sh sho like you!" she guffawed. "I-I'll bet the Applesh were mighty shore at you for that!"

"H-hey, nopony can tell me that he didn't have it comin'!" said Fiddlesticks with a few snickers of her own.

Their revelry was interrupted by the click of a lamp. When the room was illuminated, they both saw Vinyl Scratch, sitting on the couch with her forelegs folded and a bemused grin on her face. Octavia's face became even redder than it already was.

"O-oh! Vinyl!" she said. "Wh-what are you doing here?"

"What time do you call this?" asked Vinyl.

Octavia paused for a moment, and then placed a hoof to her chin. "No, wait. We had thish dishcussion lasht night. I know thish one," she mused, racking her brain. "Um, uh... Oh, yesh! Half pasht one!"

"It's actually two o'clock," said Vinyl.

"Eh, cloesh enough," said Octavia with a shrug.

Vinyl raised an eyebrow. "And where exactly have you been, you little hypocrite?" she asked.

"Hey! Are-are y'all pickin' on mah shishter?" Fiddlesticks slurred, pointing an accusatory hoof at Vinyl as she wobbled back and forth. "'Caushe Ah don't take kindly to that! No, shir! In fact, Ah know fer a fact that y'all are usually the one partyin' all night long, sho you've got no leg to shtand on!"

"Actually, I do," said Vinyl in a very matter-of-fact tone. "Why do you think I called her a hypocrite?"

Octavia giggled. "Oh, Vinyl. You know I like to have fun every onche and again," she purred. "Don't be shuch a shtick-in-the-mud."

Vinyl opened her mouth to retort, but then stopped herself. "Too easy," she said with a dismissive wave of her hoof.

Fiddlesticks chuckled. "Actually, there'sh a reashon Tavia doeshn't go out ash much ash you do."

"Oh really?" said Vinyl, pretending that she didn't know. "And what's that?"

"She'sh a real lightweight."

Octavia gave Fiddlesticks a playful nudge. "Oh, now who'sh the hypocrite, huh? All it took wash one drink for you to try and shtart a hoedown!"

"Hootenanny," Fiddlesticks corrected.

"Whatever," said Octavia. "The shong you were shinging didn't even make shensh!"

"What?" said Fiddlesticks with a shrug. "It wash the shong Ah played at that reunion. Y'know, the one that convinched me to vishit ya?"

"Fiddle, we were drinking at a bar, not raishing a barn," said Octavia. "Everypony wash shtaring at you like you were crazshy."

"They weren't only shtarin' at me," said Fiddlesticks slyly. "After all, you choesh to join in."

"W-well, I didn't want you to get embarrasshed."

"Horshe applesh. Y'all were jush' ash tipshy ash Ah wash."

"Wow. Sounds like I missed quite the party," said Vinyl with a chuckle.

"Eh, could've been better if more poniesh joined in," said Fiddlesticks. "Ah knew Ah should've brought mah fiddle."

"You mean your violin," said Octavia.

"Are we really shtartin' on thish again?"

"Fiddleshicksh, there'sh no differench."

"Mah hoof there ain't!"

"Alright, tell me one."

"Fine! Piech o'cake," said Fiddlesticks. "Now lesshee, uh... Hmm..."

"I'm waiting~," said Octavia in a singsong voice.

"Hey, d-don't rush me! Ah'm a'thinkin'!" said Fiddlesticks. "Hmm... Well, it'sh like thish. When Ah play it, it'sh a fiddle. When y'all play it, it'sh a violin."

"Sho they're pretty much the shame thing."

"Exactly! No, wait..."

Octavia couldn't contain herself as she doubled over with laughter. Vinyl had a bit of a chuckle herself.

"Okay, as much as I could listen to your little comedy routine all night, I think you could both use some sleep," said she.

"Mmm. Shleep shoundsh niche," said Octavia with a light yawn. "But jusht one thing."

"What is it, Tavi?"

Octavia got onto the couch and pinned Vinyl down. "If you wake me and Fiddleshticksh up tomorrow with your wubsh, we are going to buck you sho hard, you won't be able to walk shtraight," she said in a semi-sultry voice.

Vinyl gulped. "Um, just so we're clear, do you mean the good kind of bucking, or the bad kind?"

"The ole fashioned Apple kind," said Fiddlesticks with a sinister sneer.

"Right, that's the bad kind. I'll just make a note of that," said Vinyl. She then used her magic to take up a post-it note and pen. She wrote down "Touch and Die" on the note and posted it on the stereo.

"Good girl," Octavia cooed. "Well, I'll shee you in the morning light, Marshmallow. Goodnight~."

She then gave Vinyl a kiss and staggered away. Fiddlesticks snickered, and Vinyl's cheeks began to bring out her eyes.

"Sh-she callsh ya 'Marshmallow?!'" Fiddlesticks asked between laughs.

"Only when she's like this," said Vinyl with a sigh. "Yeah, yeah, yuk it up. Man, I can't believe this. I was expecting you to embarrass Octy, not for her to embarrass me."

There was then a thump from down the hall.

"Who put thish door frame in the way?" Octavia's voice called out.

Vinyl forgot her embarrassment as she sniggered and shook her head. "Looks like I'll be helping her get into bed. G'night, Fiddle."

"Yeah, 'night," said Fiddlesticks, trying to control her laughter. As Vinyl left to help Octavia, Fiddlesticks settled herself on the couch and lowered her stetson over her eyes. As she drifted off to sleep, she was still giggling. "Eheehehehehe. Marshmallow..."

Comments

[The Princess Rarity]

Tavi's pet name for Vinyl and this part, "Who put thish door frame in the way?", just made my afternoon, lmfao.

[HappyPetals]

I like how quickly this is being updated.

[ShadowLDrago]

"What time do you call this?" asked Vinyl.

The sheer irony.

Octavia paused for a moment, and then placed a hoof to her chin. "No, wait. We had thish dishcussion lasht night. I know thish one," she mused, racking her brain. "Um, uh... Oh, yesh! Half pasht one!"
"It's actually two o'clock," said Vinyl.

Which is worse.

Octavia giggled. "Oh, Vinyl. You know I like to have fun every onche and again," she purred. "Don't be shuch a shtick-in-the-mud."
Vinyl opened her mouth to retort, but then stopped herself. "Too easy," she said with a dismissive wave of her hoof.

Way too easy.

Octavia gave Fiddlesticks a playful nudge. "Oh, now who'sh the hypocrite, huh? All it took wash one drink for you to try and shtart a hoedown!"
"Hootenanny," Fiddlesticks corrected.

Details.

Octavia got onto the couch and pinned Vinyl down. "If you wake me and Fiddleshticksh up tomorrow with your wubsh, we are going to buck you sho hard, you won't be able to walk shtraight," she said in a semi-sultry voice.
Vinyl gulped. "Um, just so we're clear, do you mean the good kind of bucking, or the bad kind?"
"The ole fashioned Apple kind," said Fiddlesticks with a sinister sneer.

So the bad kind.

"Sh-she callsh ya 'Marshmallow?!'" Fiddlesticks asked between laughs.

Yep.

"Who put thish door frame in the way?" Octavia's voice called out.

GENIUS!