• Published 4th Apr 2013
  • 2,569 Views, 82 Comments

Hey Diddle Diddle, A Visit From Fiddle - Metool Bard

Fiddlesticks decides to pay her twin sister a visit. Cue the sitcom shenanigans!

  • ...

Slaves of Routine

There was a loud crash as Vinyl Scratch stumbled into her apartment with the grace of a clumsy ox. Hastily and sloppily, she picked herself up and fixed the lamp she had knocked over.

Okay, here's hoping Octy didn't hear that, she thought, taking a quick look around. She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw that not a light was on in the apartment. As quietly as she could, she closed the door and began making her way to the bedroom, wobbling all the while. She didn't get far before bumping into a table and falling over again.

"Ow! Sunnova..."

Her musings were interrupted by the click of a lamp. Looking up, she saw Octavia sitting on the couch and dressed in her robes, looking rather cross. Vinyl swallowed.

"O-oh! Hey, Octy!" she said, trying to play it cool as she picked herself up off the floor. "Wh-what're you doing up?"

There was a heavy pause as Octavia stared at Vinyl coldly. "What time do you call this?" she asked, breaking the silence.

Vinyl gave Octavia a puzzled look. "Uh, I call it nighttime," she said with a shrug. "Why? Do you call it something else or something?"

Octavia folded her forelegs. "For your information, Vinyl, it's half past one."

"Ooooooh~! So it's technically morning then," said Vinyl, sheepishly rubbing the back of her head. "Heh, my bad."

Octavia didn't even bat an eyelid at Vinyl's comment. "Where have you been?" she inquired.

Vinyl's eyes darted around the room. "W-well, I was just at my gig!" she said nervously. "Y-you know I work late on Thursdays."

"It's Saturday."

"Well, yeah, now it's Friday, but... Wait, did you say Friday or Saturday?"


"Aw, crap."

Octavia's expression remained deadpan. "That was quite amusing, Vinyl. I simply cannot contain myself," she said dryly. "Now, can we perhaps dally with the truth for a while?"

"O-oh, right. Yeah, sure," said Vinyl, racking her brain for an easy way out of this predicament. "Um, uh... I was caught in gridlock, then I was struck by lightning, and then there was this manticore, and you're not buying any of this, are you?"

"You know me so well," said Octavia in a mocking tone. She then sighed. "Vinyl, you and I both know that it was your turn to get dinner tonight, or rather last night. I gave you twenty bits in good faith. Now where's our supper?"

"Okay, just give me a sec," said Vinyl, searching her mind for answers. "Twenty bits, yeah, I remember that... Wait, that was today?!"

Octavia groaned and slapped her face with her hoof. "No, Vinyl. It was yesterday. We've already been over this."

"Oh, rightrightright," said Vinyl. "Yeah, the whole, midnight, thingamabobber."

Octavia gave another sigh. "Every single time, it's always the same song and dance. Your turn to prepare dinner comes up, and you just scamper off to who-knows-where and forget all about it. What do I have to do, tie a ribbon around your horn?"

A sneaky grin formed on Vinyl's face as she cocked her eyebrow seductively. "That might not be a bad idea, Tavi," she purred, making her way over to Octavia and pinning her to the couch. "You can give me the ribbon, and when I get home, you'll unwrap me like a Hearth's Warming present, and then..."

"Stop right there, Vinyl. That's not going to happen," said Octavia, wrinkling her nose as she took a whiff of Vinyl's breath. "Ugh, just as I suspected. You've wasted my money treating yourself to a night on the town. Again."

"Hey, that's not fair, Octy," said Vinyl with a pout, sitting up and placing her hooves on her hips. "I don't do that every night."

"No, just whenever you feel like it," said Octavia, rolling her eyes.

"And that's not every night. So ha!" said Vinyl smugly.

Octavia was not amused. "Vinyl, this has to stop. I don't mind you being out during all hours of the night; that's just your wont. But you have to stop spending my money on frivolous things."

"Well, maybe you should stop giving it to me then," Vinyl countered. "Ever think of that?"

Octavia raised an eyebrow. "If you're trying to get out of doing errands, it's not working."

Dammit, she's onto me, Vinyl thought. C'mon, Vinyl Scratch. You can get out of this. Just put on that ole DJ P0N-3 charm.

She then leaned down close and stroked Octavia's mane. "Y'know, you're cute when you're mad. Have I ever told you that?"

"Yes. Yes you have," said Octavia plainly. "It's getting quite old, actually."

"Crud. W-well..."

"Save it, Vinyl," said Octavia, pushing the white unicorn off of her. "I honestly don't know why I put up with you sometimes."

"Oh, that's a load of horse apples," said Vinyl coyly as she sat up. "We both know it's because I'm sexy."

"For the record, that one's getting old, too," said Octavia. "Alright, I've had just about enough of this nonsense. It's time we both went to bed."

"What? Are you crazy?" said Vinyl. "I don't need to put no hay in no sack and hit it with forty winks or whatever."

"That's a mixed metaphor."

"I'd like to mix your metaphor, if you know what I mean."

"I rarely do."

"Good, 'cause I don't know what I meant, either," said Vinyl with a laugh. "Thank you, Manehattan! Goodnight!"

And with that, Vinyl finally passed out. Octavia sighed.

"The ironic thing is that she's going to be bright eyed and bushy tailed come daybreak," she muttered, dragging Vinyl to the bedroom. "I'll never figure out where she gets all her energy."

As she laid Vinyl into their bed, a small smirk crossed her face.

"Heh. It's the same as always," she whispered. "She has her fun, and I keep everything from falling apart. She might be a terrible roommate, but at least she enjoys herself. Now if only I could teach her to behave herself, too..."

"Only when you stop acting like a prudish stick-in-the-mud."

Octavia's face turned bright red. "V-Vinyl! I..."

Vinyl chuckled. "It's like you said, Tavi. I'm the pony who has fun, you're the pony who maintains order. Honestly, I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world."

Octavia smirked. "Only because you're the sole beneficiary of this arrangement."

"C'mon, admit it. You get something out of it, too."

"Like what?"

"Like me! I'm one-of-a-kind, baby!"

Octavia snickered. "Well, I can't argue with that. And actually, I'm very grateful you're so unique."

"See? Told ya!" said Vinyl as Octavia crawled into bed. Vinyl then narrowed her eyes. "Waaaaaaait a minute. Was that a shot?"

Octavia giggled. "Goodnight, Vinyl," she said, promptly falling asleep.

Vinyl chuckled a bit and shook her head. "Yeah, 'night," she said, falling into a peaceful slumber herself.