The Stars That Circle the Moon
Entry Five: Masks
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Given her age, Celestia was well acquainted with the fact that life wasn't fair.
She also knew the price of immortality was that this unfairness just so happened to last a little while longer than everyone else's. The path she preferred may not be the right one for another and this was perfectly okay. Existence was a subjective experience, each pair of eyes able to behold a different sight despite gazing at the same work of art, and she had sat through enough rants and expressions to know that her citizen's needs were severe in their distinctions and variations.
What is a miracle to one may be a curse to another. The princess was no exception to the rule.
It was also a matter of selflessness, Celestia's own double-ended blade. Her unabashed, raw willingness to give just for the sake of giving was both what she stood tall for and what brought her down to her knees. Sacrifice was what her universe was manifested from and her own happiness was always forfeit.
So, when Luna had drove a stake right through the core of her heart, all this had become very, very clear. Simple words had been her weapon of choice, reaching Celestia's ears and being brandished in her brain.
'Your student,' Luna had said, uncharacteristically timid for a pony usually so set in their ways. Her eyes were everywhere except on Celestia. 'She is quite the mage, is she not?'
Celestia remained muzzle-deep in her stack of paperwork but ceased reading whatever negotiation or request had been in front of her at that moment, keeping her ears from perking up in curiosity now having moved up on her list of priorities. 'Twilight Sparkle is particularly... gifted, so to speak. Her potential is something even I cannot foresee. '
There was a pause, Celestia almost able to actually hear the gears in her sister's head churning and clashing. 'Has she been your student for long?'
'Oh, yes. For quite some time already.' Absent-minded, she scrawled her signature on a random document, all too obvious that her penmanship was a bit distracted. 'Since she was about eight or nine years old. Even then, she excelled in magical ability.'
'Ahh, I see.' Luna appeared to be gazing at nothing, eyes looking introspectively inward instead of out. Another pause. Her hesitation may as well have been tangible, any ounce of the headstrong Princess of the Moon absent.
Celestia wasn't even moving her eyes to pretend to read this time, her vision cemented downward as anticipation rose.
Luna gave a delicate, polite cough, and continued. 'And are you rather... fond of her?'
'Where is this conversation going, Luna?' Celestia looked up at this point, her quill accidentally freed from its magical grip and plunging to the desk, small droplets of ink spreading out and staining the wood.
'I apologize if I seem to be a bother.' Luna had staggered back a step, an eyebrow cocked at her sister. 'I merely mean to receive your blessing.'
It was Celestia's turn to look baffled. 'My blessing?'
'Yes,' She could tell Luna was battling with the grin that pulled at her lips -- not her coy smirk, but a genuine smile, which in itself was a cause to be celebrated. 'I would not pursue a courtship with Twilight Sparkle without the blessing of the one who is both my sister and her mentor.'
And with a mere sentence, over a thousand years of composure and stoicism came rushing to her aid.
'Of course you have my blessing, sister.'
It had been a lie, of course, but worse ones had been spoken. Even if by some outlandish alignment of fate she had chosen the truth, she wouldn't have been able to say no to Luna. Even if the words she was unable to whisper to her own shadow spewed out, there would have been no resistance towards the younger princess' request on her part. Who was she to deny her own flesh and blood the prospect of happiness?
Even if that happiness should have belonged to her.
But life was not fair.
In recent days it had been hitting her especially hard, the weight of being torn between selfishness and -- there was that word -- sacrifice colliding with her as soon as she rose with her sun. There was an ironic, funny little thought she sometimes had: that her attuned celestial body stood firm and strong in place and had the universe revolve around it while Celestia was the paragon of just the opposite, her life revolving around everyone else.
She enjoyed it, though. Helping brought her joy.
Not the kind of joy she yearned for while alone at night, her bed like a grave, but it was joy nonetheless.
Day Court now waiting for her, Celestia strode down the halls, poise as regal and refined as ever. Besides sacrifice, self-control was her greatest ally, her mask having a millennia worth of crafting and polishing to make it shine brighter than her regalia. The facade, resplendent and immaculate, was the only perfect thing about her and even then, it was the mere illusion of perfection. But that made all the difference in the world.
Just like a handful of others in the castle, the particular hall she was in was adorned in the most impressive stained glass works of craftsmanship and feats of creativity. The walls spoke through these monochromatic windows, acting as bards and murmuring tales and histories to anyone lucky or cultured enough to understand, although they were much more akin to memories for Celestia. They served as tiny reminders, some warm and triumphant that elicited a private smile from her every time she passed, and others that were not so pleas-
The one depicting Nightmare Moon caught her eye.
At one point in time, even before powerful little Twilight Sparkle had entered her world, she would have admitted that experiencing jealousy had always felt strange and out of place for her. She was not prone to it like her sister was and when conflicts between them began to escalate, she had so carelessly dismissed it as a psychological issue of birth order and nothing more.
Guilt ended up strangling her with the truth. She had been a fool back then.
As she swept her gaze away from the blue-tinted battle scene, she assumed she was just getting a taste of what she dished out. In a morbid sort of fashion, she felt as if she finally understood Luna now, her sister's psyche no longer pieces of an enigmatic puzzle that just revealed an even more frustratingly elusive picture.
Luna wanted to be loved. And that was all.
Celestia heard her hoofsteps increase in tempo without her realizing, a sudden urgency to leave dragging her forward to the shortcut through the archives. Distraction was what she craved, her own thoughts becoming poison. Yes, a day of aiding her beloved subjects was exactly what she needed. Things were... safer this way.
Had anyone else been around, suspicion would have been expressed in a shallow 'princess, are you okay?' for how she bolted in, using her magic to keep the door from bashing right through the wall in her haste. The archives contained a respectful silence that lingered thick in the air, as if speaking too loud would disturb the scrolls and upset the books. It was a deafness Celestia was familiar with and it followed her each time she stepped her hoof in a room, every mouth clamping shut in fear of disrespect as opposed to just speaking to her respectfully. There was a difference.
She leaned her frame against a wall in hopes of reclaiming her breath, but it was caught in her throat as soon as she inhaled.
Through the iron bars of the Starswirl the Bearded Wing were two unmistakably familiar dark-coated ponies, their limbs an entangled bulk of blue and purple and their bodies sprawled out on the couch. Scrolls piled around them as if they were snack wrappers from a sleepover and not ancient tomes of knowledge, a chunky leather bound book nestled between them like a newborn.
I suppose it was bound to happen, Celestia thought, swallowing hard despite herself. The redeemer and the redeemed. She continued to Day Court, checking her mask for any cracks along the way.
That could be her, entwined without a worry and mind hazy with adoration.
That should be her.
But life was not fair.
Urrrrk, my feels...
Poor Celestia, ever the proper Princess. Never able to take what she wants.
Dear Faust... Poor Celestia. The feels on that one hit me like a runaway train...
A nice look into Celestia's Mind, though I hope this doesn't mean that she's going try and interfere with Luna and Twilight's relationship later down the line.
Regardless, a good chapter. Hope to see more in the future.
I'll admit I did not expect the chapter from Celestia's point of view, and while its sad, sure, all I can really think is "All's fair in love and war" and "Early Bird Gets the Worm" It was also kinda nice for Celestia to feel jealous, note the emotion and then note the comparison to Luna. Given the first paragraph, it sounds like Celestia's been down the road of outliving lovers before and she tries to cut herself off from her emotions and purposely stays away from getting involved no matter how much she wants too, while Luna doesn't because she hasn't perhaps experienced the losses Celestia has. I eagerly look forward to more installments.
Edit: Are all these stories connected to each other? If so, I think it might retroactively make the Chapter "The Second Best Thing" kinda sad as well...
Is there gonna be a Springer moment later in the story?
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CELEBRATE.
I hope I'm invited.
Could we perhaps...
Have a story...
Wherein Celestia gets to be happy?
Please?
I'd had my eye on this one, hoping to see more.
OUCH.
Huh? wtf? I thought I tracked this story...and it happens that I missed like 3 chapters?
Hmmm...
Each chapter up til now carries a heavy or strong emotion to it. This one felt beautifully tragic to me. Nothing more, nothing less. Yet so perfect.
If you've set out to out to vigorously stir the emotions of your readers... congratulations.
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Her Radiant Majesty deserves happiness even more than Luna, who nearly brought about genocide out of pettiness. :|
To give so much, and get nothing in return that she actually -needs- is beyond cruel. Whereas Luna has always had Celestia looking out for her, then Luna tried to -take- from her, and now that Luna's back, she's taking -again- this time just without force and combat.
People can go on and on about poor sad little Luna, but I rarely hear anything about Celestia's far greater hardships outside of the ranks of the Solar Empire. Why does the sinner get to be happy and the martyr never find any peace?
JUSTICE! We call for it! Or... I'ma cry.
Even though I don't like Celestia I can't help but feel a little bad for her, I do understand her "problem" but I'm a rather selfish person and I would never sacrifice anything to obtain my own interests, even if I had to walk on thousands of corpses to achieve my desires (then again I'm not what you would consider a "decent" person).
PS. I forgot where I wanted to go with this...
Great way to keep on the TwiLuna topic but present it from an entirely different (outside) perspective.
Not sure about this wording: "The walls spoke through these monochromatic windows". If we're talking about stained glass, then they'd be polychromatic. Monochromatic means single-color, which seems out of place here.
great chapter!
celestia deserves happiness as well, isn't there a solution for everyone?
also; we know what happens when an alicorn feels incredibly jealous...hello daymare sun! (not now of course, but it's a possibility)
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Yeah, I was a little torn between that too. I took the Celestia/Luna scene in the first episode of season three as a reference and the windows only seemed to have one or two colors.
1643611 Was the original conflict with Nightmare Moon as black and white as the wicked and petty Luna dooming all the world in a fit of jealousy and being struck down by the mighty and righteous Celestia? We don't know? Did Celestia ever feel remorse for what happened? We don't know. Is there any lingering resentment between the two? We don't know.
What do we know? Celestia and Luna were at one time the best of friends, then the most bitter of enemies, and now all seems to be forgiven. About Luna, we know that she always wanted to be as loved as Celestia, she is sorry for what happened, and she's struggling to putt the past behind her. About Celestia, we don't know much at all.
Considering what drove them apart was one being honored above the other I can't stand stand the Solar Empire and New Luna Republic. Why does one have to be better than the other? Aren't they supposed to be equals?
Well fuck. I don't know where you are gonna take this from here... But I know one thing. There. Are. Not. Enough. Twilestias.
Don't get me wrong. I frickn love a good twiluna. But twilestia was was the ship that confirmed my bronyhood. It also doesn't help that your write a damn good twilestia swag.
Also, my calendar has been marked. Swagday is now official, bitches.
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That's ridiculous. She either needs to be a sad immortal, or a super troll. She can't have true happiness, it's like, a law, or something.
Oh, and I am so glad that this story updated!
I swear to god if this doesn't evolve into a main plot device im gonna....
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It wasn't a matter of one being honored above the other. It's a matter that Celestia and Luna had opposing, similar duties, and that ponies are diurnal by nature. This is something Luna was supposed to be fine with... instead, showing an infinitely unattractive weakness as a leader, she grew dissatisfied and jealous because ponies didn't cavort about at night worshipping her sky. She dropped the ball as a role model, ruler, and person.
That's pretty fuckin' petty, Jeeves. And I never said Luna is wicked. Word of God has it that her jealousy and teenage-angst level of drama attracted and allowed her to be possessed by the malevolent spirit Nightmare, thus creating Nightmare Moon, who warped Luna's wants in order to bring the death and devastation it wanted. Eternal Night would have been genocide. You tell me what Celestia was supposed to do during their conflict. Kill her own sister to save the world? If she didn't have the Elements, which did not function properly due to being wielded by one pony, then yes... that's what would have had to have happened. Instead she managed to seal Nightmare Moon away, and given that she already knew NMM was returning, means she's been waiting all this time to see her sister again.
Unlike the NLR's unbridled and idiotic hatred of Celestia, considering they go about telling everyone NMM's genocidal machinations were just because she was misunderstood and that Celestia is an evil tyrant who wanted to be rid of her little sister and keep all the power for herself, the Solar Empire actually loves Luna. Yes, she's petty, and overall weak-willed compared to Celestia, but she still ends up being a victim. Not of Celestia, but a victim of her own faults, which means she needs to take time to get past them - rather than condemning her forever.
Which still changes nothing of what I've said. While Luna was dealing with the repercussions of her weakness of character, Celestia was holding the world together and keeping their nation safe, alone as the only alicorn - more alone than anyone can be, being the only one of your kind. The only problem I have with everyone fawning over Luna 24/7 with no love for Celestia is that out of the two of them, only ONE of them was petty enough to nearly destroy the world. With all plausibility and deductive logic in place, Celestia's sacrifices and sorrows know no end... but no, it's Luna who's treated by everyone as some sort of icon or hero by you people.
It's almost as if people can't fathom what Celestia had to deal with. To me, that's just pretty damn sad. So, you can hate all you want - just keep in mind that out of the two camps, only one of us tends to be shallow.
Uh-huh . . .
I want a follow-up to this chapter.
It practically demands a follow-up considering the premise.
Also, I'll be honest, I'm still not sure which, if any, of these stories follow from others.
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They don't really follow each other at all. Just random little ideas.
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IC.
Also in regards to chapter 5, I'm not a big fan of how it treats love.
When you have a story, short stories in particular, you want to focus on the main issue. But this leads to the problem of excluding other things.
(In my experience it's a particular problem with romance.) That sort of exclusion can lead to a kind of one-note character, someone who seems to only have a single dimension to them. In this case we have a Celestia with an undeclared love for Twilight, so when Luna goes after her instead Celestia gets all morose and then that's basically the end of the vignette. It makes her appear very limited, and to be honest we don't know much about Celestia to begin with, so it can be hard to write her.
On the one hand, the story is about romance so it should definitely stay centered there, but on the other a character whose motivations and thoughts are so utterly centered on the romantic can simply be unrelatable. There's just not enough depth to make them seem like an actual person (or pony in this case).
Just my two cents.
1646666 We don't know that eternal night would be as catastrophic in Equestria as would be in real life, we know almost nothing about Luna's fall from grace, and I'm pretty sure Luna was more lonely than her sister during her banishment. You have to make quite a few assumptions to come to the conclusions that you have. Also, while Luna tends to be the more popular character she is usually portrayed as inferior to her sister by the fandom.
This was a well done chapter, I enjoyed it
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Yes we do. Word of God, Lauren Faust. Eternal Night is just as dangerous as it logically would be.
And you're making some hefty assumptions there yourself, whereas I used deductive reasoning. You're assuming that Luna was even conscious while bound in the moon. It's not like NMM was up there stomping around on the surface or something for a thousand years while Luna was along for the ride. You can be alone, and lonely, in the middle of crowd of adoring people fawning over you every moment. If you can't understand that, then I can see why you might think Luna was worse off.
1647776 "Yes we do. Word of God, Lauren Faust. Eternal Night is just as dangerous as it logically would be."
I never heard what Lauren Faust had to say on the matter, but until it's in the show it isn't canon.
"And you're making some hefty assumptions there yourself, whereas I used deductive reasoning. You're assuming that Luna was even conscious while bound in the moon."
So you're saying she wasn't?
"You can be alone, and lonely, in the middle of crowd of adoring people fawning over you every moment. If you can't understand that, then I can see why you might think Luna was worse off."
Now you're making assumptions about me. Don't make this personal. Nothing I said was meant to offend.
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Doesn't matter if you heard it or not, it's what she's said. And it was meant to be in the show, but was cut due to time constraints. Go look for it yourself, you'll see what I mean.
You said she was. I said you're assuming she was. She might or might not have been, however - it's far more likely she wasn't. For one, she was possessed. Two, she was sealed in a celestial body. That's two levels of shit to be buried under when it comes to one's conscious.
No one made anything personal. I said IF YOU CAN'T understand it, that's not offensive any way you look at it unless you are -trying- to see it that way. If you don't have the frame of reference necessary to understand that concept, then yes, it makes sense to me that you can so easily disagree with that part of my stance. Big difference between knowing something, and experiencing it first-hand; a difference we call understanding.
Anything else you want to misconstrue in a negative light?
1648173 For your information I have more experience with that than most. I did not say that I was offended by what you said, only that I did not mean to offend you. It seems you've made up your mind that Celestia is a better person and more sympathetic character than Luna and take personal offense when someone expresses an opinion to the contrary. I only wished to have a polite and civil argument, but unless I'm misjudging the tone of your replies, you do seem to be upset by what I've said. So, I apologize for touching on such a sensitive topic, and I find it unfortunate that who your favorite pretty pony princess is should be a sensitive topic.
Love is not diminished by being shared so
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~cough~
What we have here is a lesson.
When one gives their all they recieve nothing in return.
When one gives nothing they recieve it all in return.
As you said Celestia's just too selfless to take anything for herself and thus is doomed to sit upon her gilded throne with the love of a nation but none of the heart.
It is so tragic and I wish she'd be more selfish... She of all deserves it most.
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So much irony. When you posted that, I was in the middle of a heated discussion where I was in Celestia's position in all this. The universe is fucking with me.
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Welp...
Its what the universe does best...
Sorry but thats how it is.
No refunds.
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and i though i was the only one who ships twilunestia
there needs to be more storys where they share twilight
interesting