The Lyruminati

by Silly Words

Interesting Once in a Lifetime Times

Author's Note:

It's been more than a year's worth of waiting, but I feel I am not able to make this chapter any better. Perhaps it's because I need more practice.

No jabs were planned to appear in this chapter, yet a few sneaked in anyway. They looked at me cute, though, so I let them stay.

Bon-bon was as still as a rock. All her concentration was directed to the jar she carefully tilted. Three viscous drops of a rainbow coloured substance spilled into a hot mixture. Satisfied, she relaxed, smiled and put the jar away. Then, she stirred the mixture, and finally poured it to a number of prepared forms.

“And it's done. The sweets should be ready and perfect once they cool down.”

Putting the empty bowl down, she noticed the dishes that laid all around her kitchen. “And, as always, there's so much to clan up afterward,” she sighed and proceeded to pick them up.

“Hey! Lyra! Would you like to lick the bowls?” She called.

Silence answered her. As she expected. It was a full week since the unicorn in question closed herself in her new underground bunker. Bon-bon was impressed that she had enough bits to get one installed, especially one so roomy and with quite a few anti-magic gadgets and protections. She was, however, less than pleased about the fact that the entrance was put into their cellar without her permission.

She had hoped Lyra would come to her senses in time, but it seemed more and more a lost cause. So with another sigh, she went down to hopefully do something about that.

As she entered the cellar, the massive new door was shut and as foreboding as it had been a week ago. Quite a few bags of sugar she stored around were missing for it to fit in and be able to open.

She approached and knocked a couple times. A few seconds passed and a click was heard. It was followed by a female voice: “Yes, what is it?”

“Good afternoon to you too,” Bon-bon deadpanned. “I was wondering if you'd like to have the mintbow leftover mixes, as usual.”

The door kept silent for a while. “It's a ploy, isn't it?”

“Eh. No, I'm pretty sure it's the usual mix.” Bon-bon rolled her eyes.

“That's exactly what an agent of Discord would say!” Shouted Lyra.

“Actually, I think they would either keep silent or speak in riddles,” retorted Bon-bon. “Seriously. Stop cowering in there and come out. Discord is reformed, there's no chaos capital growing around us, and I doubt you have enough food in there to last you 'till winter. Not to mention I have had a lot of ponies, quite a few of them angry, ask when will your workshop be open again. I will not support you with bits if you waste them on this... This silliness.”

“Well I'm not taking any chances!”

The earth pony rolled her eyes again. She didn't like doing this, but she gave in to Lyra's stubbornness too many times in the past. “Fine, then. I'll let somepony else have the mix. I'm sure Pinkie Pie will enjoy it.”

“NO! Don't you dare! That demon doesn't deserve such treats!”

Lyra's shout was followed by a series of clicks, indicating that the complex locks on the door were being opened. Then, the door slowly opened, revealing a nervous unicorn. Bon-bon noted that she looked ruffled. Also, a couple seconds later, she also noticed the nasty aura that spread from her.

Lyra took a step out of the door and looked around. Slowly, carefully, as if she expected some of the bags to bite her or Bon-bon to disappear in a puff of fluff.

“Welcome to the land of the living,” grimaced Bon-bon, as the odour reached her in full.

“What does that mean?” Lyra asked as she passed the other mare. “It's not a grave.”

“Well, it certainly smells like one. Have you had a shower lately?”

Lyra smiled sheepishly and laid her ears back. “Uhm, well, the water circuit broke three days ago.”

Bon-bon blinked. Then blinked again. She ended the combo with a facehoof.

“Before you say anything,” Lyra held her hoof up to stop whatever her aunt might say, “I saw Discord be re-released. Safety goes before comfort. But... I'm willing to trust you. If things are as safe as you say they are-”

Bon-bon didn't give Lyra a change to finish and held up a hoof herself. “Just... Go.”

Lyra ascended the stairs and checked that Ponyville was indeed as she remembered. Then, she shifted her attention to the kitchen, where the promised bowls of sweet mix laid. However, before she could step in, she was stopped by Bon-bon calling her name.

“Don't go in there. Wash up first.”

“But auntie...”

“No. I will not let you bring filth inside.”

“Oh, fine.” Lyra relented and turned around. “By the way, you don't make mintbows often. What's the occasion?”

“Princess Sparkle's coronation.”

The unicorn suddenly froze. “W- What?”

“Oh, yes, just yesternight, Twilight Sparkle became an alicorn princess. It was a rather strange day too. But nothing that much out of the ordinary. I'm sure you'd like to congratulate...” Bon-bon's monologue trailed off as she realized her niece is nowhere in sight. Then a metallic bang echoed from in her cellar followed by a series of quiet clicks of a complicated mechanism.

“Lyra, this is getting beyond ridiculous.”

She didn't get any answer and went back to the bunker door, now again closed. She tried knocking, but this time, no answer was heard. After a few minutes of contemplation, she decided to take drastic measures.

She moved to a place a few hooflengths in front of the door, stood as it expecting a battle and took a deep breath.

"Lyrica Peppermint von Heartstrings!"

The Voice, as it was called, was an ability Bon-bon discovered sometime shortly after getting her cutie mark, when her normal voice lost its foalish squeaking quality. She was able to say things in a special way. It was only slightly louder than normal speech volume, however no listeners were able to tune it out. Some claimed it was like she spoke directly inside one's mind, getting attention more effectively than talking in the Royal Canterlot voice.

When word of her ability reached the local school, the foals started arguing if the "Voicemaster" could beat the "Staremaster". Things never got far enough for the two ponies in question to actually confront each other, but Fluttershy seemed even shyer around the candy maker afterward.

This, however, was only one reason Bon-bon didn't do it often. Another reason is that the usage of the Voice made her throat sore quickly and sometimes even temporarily changed her normal voice. One time Bon-bon used it, it was to lecture her former coltfriend, when she discovered he was just a lying cheater. She only talked for two minutes. For him, it probably felt like two hours. After that, Bon-bon could hardly speak for the rest of the day. She couldn't even haggle with shopkeepers, only managing a lousy "I didn't put those in my bag!" when she was falsely accused, getting tons of apples before she managed to figure out how to react without more speaking.

As such, right now she hoped those four strong words of Lyra's full name would be enough to get the unicorn out. Fortunately, they were. Lyra exited in a daze, giving even more of a zombie impression than just on smell alone.

---

“What interesting times we live in,” mused an earth pony mare with a cutie mark of an icing dispenser.

“I know, Cream. A princess coronation. Those are so rare, they happen even less than once in a lifetime. I am quite happy to live through it.” Answered Bon-bon, watching the royal balcony, as a purple pony she knew as just a unicorn neighbor waved her new alicorn hoof to the crowd.

“Huh? Oh, yeah, that too.”

Bon-bon passed a questioning glance at the brown earth pony.

“I just can't remember when I've seen my daughter that happy,” Cream nodded toward a positively ecstatic Lyra. “But as much as I'd like to hope the county air has done her good, there's just no way she got that in just the two weeks time since your last letter.”

“That's true. Don't even ask about what she did in that time.”

The conversation halted for a while as Princess Twilight sparkle addressed the assembled crowd and a wave of cheers exploded in return.

“Do you remember about Zecora? The zebra alchemist I wrote about a few months ago? Well, turns out Lyra tried one of her brews. Supposedly, it was meant to 'show things hidden to one's eyes' or something. She thought it would unravel all of the alicorns' politics and secrets.”

“Ah. But instead it showed her things to be genuinely happy about instead.”

Bon-bon nodded.

“Well, once it wears off, I'm going to ground her so hard that rock farmers will get jealous. I thought I taught her better than to trust drugs.”

Lyra, oblivious to her relatives' discussion, happily hopped, grinning from ear to ear, as Princess Twilight Sparkle passed, singing, with her best friends.

Comments

[Bronydragon]

Yes! Finally a new chapter!
'T was a fun chapter. We are most pleased. More of it!
And we can't await the punishment miss Bon Bon has at the ready for miss Heartstrings.

Dragon

[Silly Words]

4480187
Sorry, the punisment is left as an exercise for the reader
As for the writer, onwards to write the next promised chapter!

[Bronydragon]

4489383
Spike?

Nooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!

Thank you Spike.

You're welcome.

It would've been so fun to read what you had in store for poor Lyra and how she'd suffer. Just imagine her pleading and whining. It would be glorious!

Dragon