A story about a young pegasus' love for a strange creature from a far-away land, and the conflict to win over his affection... by any means necessary.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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What I thought he was gonna say...
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That was heavy
I must know what he lied to her about!
*Eagerly awaits next chapter*
Wow, I loved this chapter. The ending was perfect, though a little bit cheesy
"You are Scootaloo"
Okay, good, because I thought I was agent 47 from the cover picture.
I'm sorry.. But I simply cannot read this. Please space out your stuff. My eyes simply cringe trying to read this.
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I dont know the reference - if there is one - with that weird line at the end of your comment, but lordy do I love it.
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Space it out? What do you mean...? I thought I spaced it out rather well. It reads just like any other normal book.
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Glad you enjoy, though I'm a bit disappointed you don't like my using "Anonymous" as a name. But it's not a big deal, you've got a system down for it. Also
>first person stories
Not quite. Second-person is the term you're looking for.
2410946 Yea that's my problem. I have grown so accustomed to spacing (line breaks) that trying to read a story with solely indenting cause me to get a headache. It's nothing against you or anything, but that's what I meant.
2410991
THEN STOP READING FANFICTION AND READ A DAMN BOOK OR TWO
:3
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Damn it Wuten I come back from school to start my first fic and you HAVE to update. Why is story so good to read! AANNDD my fic ideas are gone.
Did he hit Aj ? Did he say he eats Meat ?
Or that he never loved her ?
Argh, Wuten !
You frikken Tease, you made me read what seemed like a Clopfic for the Story and now you're gone for 3 Weeks .
You better not fuck shit up on your exam .
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So, how's it hangin'?
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Oh I'm doing pretty good, you?
Nice little piece here, I hope to see his past with AJ revealed a bit more later on. And it sounds like that lie he mentioned will be important at some point.
My only real complaint about this is the POV change near the end of his little story. It starts like he actually is telling them a story, in first person, but near the end it shifts back to second. Its kinda weird to read.
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I can see that. It's an even bigger reason why I decided to use italics to denote the story he was telling. It starts with a small dialogue from Anon telling them what happened, followed by the scene itself that played out. The perspective is a bit strange at first, and I think I might format this chapter a bit more to better suit the reader here.
2409824 OMG THAT WAS MY EXACT THOUGHT
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That was briefly came to mind, yup. But it would have been too cliche
-
Let me guess: He's eaten horse before.
you know, this was suppose to be one of the chapters were it reveals everything, but now im even more confused then when i was before. (well done)
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>all of these people trying to guess what the lie was
Oh boy, this is going to be good...
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Your voice is sexy .
Hmm. Gonna pretend that bit didn't happen. AJ's family not being accepting of her choices violates the canon and almost everyone's interpretations of the Apple family so hard. I do not approve.
Moving right along.
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Um... okay then...? It's gonna be a bit hard to ignore it, though; the relationship that Anon and AJ had and then broke off is a pretty big thing in this story.
The way I see it (at least in this story), the Apple family wants her to be with someone who can carry on their family's legacy; ponies and humans can't exactly have offspring together (of blood, at least) so naturally the Apple family would be opposed to the idea, at least up-front. If the two of them had maybe spent more time interacting with her family, which I'll get into later on in the story, maybe things would have played out differently?
I'm taking everything I can into consideration here. There will be explanations for most of the things that happen that are outside of the established show canon.
2451630 I can accept that Anon and AJ had a falling out, that's not the issue. But I despise the reasoning. It goes against the Apple family character in every way.
Besides, there's still Apple Bloom.
Really enjoyed reading this story so far, liked and favourited!
*in Gordon Ramsay's voice*
THIS CHICKEN IS SO RAW
YOU CAN STILL HEAR IT YELLING AT A MOUSE
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Fixed. You're the first person to catch that, thanks.
Oooh this was a good one.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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That avatar.