Equestria's Dreamscape

by Blackdrag-rose

1. The Darker Nightmare

Nighttime had fallen over Equestria and the only pony still awake was Princess Luna, who was spending her night going through the dreams of the sleeping ponies. Even after a thousand years the dreams ever got any better and the majority of them dreamed of better lives that existed when they were asleep. It was the only time she could be alone and guard anypony from their respective nightmares that they couldn't deal with themselves. It was a pass time that she enjoyed doing, helping ponies deal with their dark nightmares and allowing them to have a little peace at night.

About the only thing she couldn't deal with was her own demonic nightmare, which she had sealed away deep in her own dream world and tossed the key into an even deeper hole. Her darker half was never escaping the prison. Not for two to three thousand years at least.

That was when she felt a disturbance resonate throughout the entire dream world, shattering her peace of mind and thrusting her attention back to the world in front of her. She sent her magic throughout the areas around her, only to find that there was nothing in her immediate area that could have caused such a disturbance. Several of the trees had blown over and the sky itself, which was usually a light blue color, had become a purple color that was almost identical to Twilight Sparkle's coat color.

There was something, or somepony, else that was living besides her and the other occupants of the dream world. Something that had the power to cause such a disturbance and alert her in the process. There was only one pony that had that power and Luna had hoped that she would never have to see that pony ever again. That pony was a stallion that was capable of extraordinary magical feats and Luna could have sworn that she had seen the last of him a little over a thousand years ago.

She zoned in on where the magic force had originated from, an area with a peaceful sunset, and flew directly passed the borders that prevented ponies from leaving their own dreams. Luna could come and go as she pleased between the dreams, but to find the force that changed the area she had just been in she needed to trace it. Tracing magic was easy and it was also hard, it all depended on the skill level of the unicorn, or sometimes an alicorn if she was tracing her sister, using the magic. Bottom line was that she was either tracking a skilled unicorn, a certain draconequus, a powerful changeling queen, or another immortal alicorn.

Luna prayed to Faust that her target was either a skilled unicorn, a certain draconequus, or a powerful changeling queen and not another immortal alicorn that was as powerful as her and Celestia.

The dream area she passed through was a simple sunset, which could have meant that it might have been Sunset Shimmer's happy dream, but that wasn't much to go on. Luna followed the tug of the trace deeper into the dream world, into a much darker area in which the sky turned a darker shade of blue. The trees turned into huge thorns that stretched to the heavens and the ground turned black as the sands darkened. Everything Luna saw confirmed her suspicions that there was something else that caused the disturbance, something that had twisted one area of the dream world into such a vile location.

After a minute of flying Luna decided to land and kicked up a bunch of black sand, making her close her eyes to avoid getting any of it in her eyes. She walked deeper and deeper into the Forest of Thorns, as she decided to name it, and kept her eyes out for anything that could have disturbed the world. Eventually she came to a clearing, one with five stone pillars with what looked like a magical amethyst orb in the direct center. She stopped and looked around the rest of the clearing, trying to discover what had corrupted the area and forest like it had.

Before she could make a suitable observation of the surrounding area she found herself face to face with a cloaked pony floating above the orb. The pony was covered by darkness, so it was completely impossible for Luna to make out any details that could have told her who it was. And before she could even utter a word the pony was gone, as if he had been an echo from whoever's dream she was currently in. To make the circle complete she had somehow lost the trace, leaving her in the darkness about who she was dealing with.

The best thing she could do was lock the area in an isolated zone of the dream world until she and her sister, and maybe Twilight as well, could figure some things out. Either Luna was jumping at ghosts or she had a serious intruder that was somewhere in the dream world. One thing was for sure, the group of four alicorns were going to figure out what was happening and restore the corrupted area to normal.

She activated her magic and tore a sample of the thorns out of a tree, knowing that she could transfer it to the waking world with her once she woke up herself. With the thorn she knew that Twilight Sparkle would conduct a variety of tests until she discovered the origin of the thorn and who created the forest. Eventually she would come into the dream world and search the forest herself, which would allow the royal sisters to figure out how to battle the corruption.

The tree that was missing its thorn shivered for a second before it grew a whole new thorn, complete with what looked like a light green sappy ooze. Luna stared at it for a second before making a bag appear out of thin air and took a small sample of the strange substance. If the thorn and the ooze were connected then maybe Twilight could figure out exactly what they were dealing with. Maybe it was like a poison and its container, harm one and the deadly poison comes flowing on out into the unsuspecting victim.

Luna only hoped to Faust that whoever was behind the corruption wasn't who she had originally thought it was. Because if it was then everypony, alicorn or not, was royally bucked six ways from sunday.

Comments

[Raven Shadow]

Please let there be an epic fight Faust I pray it.

[Blackdrag-rose]

3080718
Don't worry. There is an epic fight somewhere in the story.
Faust wills it of course.

[Raven Shadow]

3080800 yay! I'm happy!

[Starlight Nova]

Have you ever considered submitting this story to Equestria Daily? You can find out how to do so here.

[Arcanist Ascendant]

"Nighttime had fallen over Equestria and the only pony still awake was Princess Luna, who was spending her night going through the dreams of the sleeping ponies. Even after a thousand years the dreams ever got any better and the majority of them dreamed of better lives that existed when they were asleep."

Hold up.

This works fine, just pace it better. Punctuation is key.

"had become a purple color that was almost identical to Twilight Sparkle's coat color."

Unless it's 'has', 'it', or other words that are merely required to piece the sentence together, try not to use one word too many times in a single sentence.

All in all, interesting, but needs help on description. You could have made this take up about 4,000 words if you described events well enough to paint a vision in the reader's heads of the scene. Ever heard of purple prose? It's bad. But doing just the opposite is worse.

I reccomend finding an editor.

EDIT: I apologise if this seems harsh. I enjoyed it, but it needs work. It would not, for example, be accepted onto EqD in its current state. At this point, what you need is not kindly-meant lies, but brutal honesty. That's how it will improve.

In fact, if you wouldn't mind, I could edit for you. It has potential.

[Sonata Blaze]

Oooh! I just have to see where this is going.

[Razzy]

Interesting start. Can't wait to see a certain very powerful changeling Queen join the cast.