A Blind Bard

by way2dawn

Quaint Questions, Pesky Ponies

As my entourage of tiny voices eventually dissipated with a few “goodbye’s” and “see ya later”, only 3 fillies remained. Applebloom, Mac and AJ’s sister, on my left, kept asking me questions about the “Canterlot Royal Voice”... whatever that was. Scootaloo, a pegasus, trotted along on my right, kept asking questions about Dash, if I had met her, and so forth. Sweetie remained in my arms, seemingly pleased that she didn’t have to walk the whole way to wherever we were headed.

“Mister? Where are we headed?” a squirming Sweetie Belle asked me

“Well, first, what time is it?” I asked my pony-child posse. It was 2:30

“I think it’s time I met this ‘Twilight’ pony that Rarity and Fluttters mentioned. Girls, do ya mind guiding me to Twilight’s?” I was promised a guide , but not after a verbal onslaught of ‘Cutie Mark Crusaders Guides’.

Directly after said aural assault, Sweetie jumped from my arms, giving me a kick to the chest. Dang, that filly can KICK... Anyway, after stopping for a chat with some pony, I was told to stop by 3 different voices.

“Mister? Can y’all climb stairs while blind?” a concerned Applebloom asked

“Nnope” was my response. a moment later, knocking was heard. We must be at Twilight’s house, thanks for warning me, girls. a few moments later, a voice that I hadnt heard in a bit of time, greeted us.

“One second!” a few moments later, the door opened, and, if my imagination serves me right, there was a scaly dragon at the door looking dumbfounded at me.

“Guy! What’re you doing here?” I was looking (I hope) at Spike! I was pulled inside, but not before tripping up a few stairs,and flopping over the stairs and floor of the house. After being apologised to over and over by the lithe little lizard, I was guided to another seat and was asked to wait while some tea was made. Sweetie and the others were gone. They were nice fillies, but they were a handful.

"Spike, do you cook? Also what tea is this?" I asked the dragon as he handed me a warm cup, after asking if I wanted any sugar or milk in my tea. I shook my head and rook the hot, but not painfully boiling cup.

"Yeah, Twilight's always forgetting to eat during one of her study sessions. My job is to make sure that she eats and basically stays healthy. She can get a BIT obsessive." At this, Spike chuckled. "At least she doesn't have to worry too much about fresh air, this being a tree and all."

"Wait, this is a tree?" I was dumbfounded. I got a confirmation and was guides to a wall, where lo-and-behold, was a large, seamless plank of wood. Even the rings in the walls felt continuing. My only coherent thought was Magic. Ha. These ponies pulled a neat trick.

Almost directly afterward, something was moving it's way towards us. It was yelling.

"Spike! Where are you? Did you finish making lunch?" The voice was female. Probably Twilight. Turning away from the tree-wall, I asked Spike if Twilight Sparkled, he said that her NAME was Twilight Sparkle, but no, she did not glimmer. Except for her horn, which sparkled and was enveloped in an aura when she used magic, like any unicorn.

"Yea, Lunch is finished, come on down! We have a guest! It's the blind stallion I told you about yesterday!" Spike yelled. A few moments later, and after being guided to a new location, and being re-handed my tea, which was left in the other room, (which by the way was a delicious citrus blend) Spike guided me into a chair and was greeted by the new pony.

"Hello, my name is Twilight Sparkle. Protogé of Princess Celestia and resident librarian of Books n' Branches." Twilight introduced herself.

"A pleasure. Now, Spike, Rarity and Fluttershy mentioned you'd want to ask me questions, that hopefully, I can answer." I seem to have pleased the unicorn, for something akin to a 'squee' emanated from Twilight's place at the table at which I was seated.

A while later, after using the restroom, which was pleasantly not too different from home, and a frantic unicorn running around the tree-house-brary™, Twilight finally returned to the kitchen where I was handed a third cup of the citrus tea, by a baby dragon. I had to hand it to the lizard. He knew the exact temperature to get water to get it to steep but not burn.

Whilst Twilight was running around, Spike took the chance to warn me about her little... episodes, before returning to whatever he was doing before. Probably chores. I thanked the little guy for the warning before he left the room.

"Well Twilight, let's start, shall we?" I stated to the unicorn that was scratching away at a piece of paper. "I think that since neither of us know practically anything about each other, I think that a fair exchange is in order." Twilight accepted these conditions.
HumanTwilight
What are you?
Human, specifically, Homo Sapiens
Where are you from?
A small village called Colhen. Outside a city called Rocheste.
Is that inside the Crystal Empire? Equestria? the Gryphon colonies?
Nope. ever hear of the Southern Plains?
Is thet where you are from?
Yep.
So. you're not from this world...
Seems so.
Have you ever heard of manticores? Cockatrice? Basilisk? Phoenix?
Yes. In legend.
Ever hear of alicorns?
Nope. Only pegasi and unicorns. also legends, by the way.
Really? Anyway, Spike was telling me about your pointed incisors. Are humans... carnivores?
Humafs haf two tyfes of teef. One for meaf, anofer for plants.

I pulled one of my lips back at the corner to let Twilight have a look. She walked toward me, and asked me to move my head around. i complied and did the requested action for a bit, before apparently being satisfied, and returning to wherever she was before, and continued scratching.

As I finished my tea, Twilight levitated the cup from me, and led me to a new room. I was placed in a large, plush chair, it had overly large armrests, and placed near a fire. Wait. A fireplace IN a tree-house-brary™? Magic, gotta be magic. Unfortunately, as soon as I got comfortable, something galloped into the study and started rattling off words at a minimum of 32 WPM (words per minute). After a few tense seconds, the pony galloped off. All I could do was turn to Twilight and ask "What? How?"

"Don't bother. Pinkie is just being Pinkie." Twilight sighed in exasperation, like she had tried to understand Pinkie before.

Something caused a breeze in front of my face, and the pony returned.

"I saaaaaiiid, Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie! You're new to Ponyville, right? Of course I'm right! I've never seen you before, and I know EVERYONE in Ponyville. You must be the thing that Big Mac brought into the Infirmary yesterday! Are you ok? Of course you are. Otherwise you wouldn't be here, especially on Nurse Redheart's watch. If you're new to Ponyville, you must not have friends, but you do, so that's great! I hope that Fluttershy, Spike, AJ, Big Mac, Nurse Redheart, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, the Crusaders, Cheerilee, and Twilight were nice to you! The only Element of Harmony you haven't met was me so here I am! Oh! come with me! I gotta show you something! Follow me!" Pinkie left again, so Twilight called her back.

"Pinkie, I know you want to show him Ponyville, but go slowly, he can't see so he needs you to go slowly. Also, you actually need to guide him." I stood up and found Pinkie's head. Her mane was frizzy, but somehow soft. I nodded to the mares and Pinkie left the tree-house-brary.

"Pinks, are you a pegasus?" I asked the mare situated at the end of my left arm I couldn't feel any wings, but I wanted to be on the safe side.

"No, silly I'm an earth pony baker!" Pinkie giggled after speaking. As we traveled around Ponyville, We had gathered a bit of a crowd in our travels. I think they enjoyed that I was answering their questions. I was soon in need of using the bathroom. Again.

"Hey everybo-pony. We have to get going, if you have any more questions, feel free to ask me, at any time i'm out and about." I used a small amount of what was called around here the 'Canterlot Royal Voice' to reach all of their ears, and got the party to disperse. "

After walking again, Pinkie began to introduce Sugarcube Corner(the place we were headed, or so I was told) as 'The Bestest bakery between bookstores, because Bagels' bagels burn and Blueberry's birds bask behind the burners, blatantly boring their beaks in the bread.'

Pinkie stopped suddenly and dashed off, leaving me behind. Sighing once again, and sitting down, I hoped that somepony would see me here and help me out.

"That was much better. Would you like some help, Sir?" A schoolteacher's voice that I recognised, approached.

"Cheers, Cheers. How are ya?" I asked, turning to the mare.

"Fine. Just fine. I wanted to apologize for my reaction earlier. I want quite expecting the Royal Voice from you. I thought only the Princesses could use it." Cheerilee sounded thoughtful at the end of her apology.

"Well Cheers, can you help a human out?" I asked "Pinkie left me behind. We were headed toward Sugarcube Corner." With that statement, Cheerilee helped me up and we started toward the Sugarcube Corner. As we walked along the cobblestone streets, I almost could hear Cheerilee chuckling, when I brought it up, she dismissed it saying,

"You'll see soon, my loud friend. You'll... well, in your case, HEAR. "

Cheerilee's words somewhat frightened me, but I trusted the schioolteacher.On the way, I thought about the questions I had to ask Twilight later. After I finish answering hers, of course.

1. Who are the Princesses?
2. Canterlot Royal Voice?
3. Elements of Harmony?
4. Is there a spell to let me hear a book's words?
4b. If not, can she read me the books?
5. Does this town have a bard already stationed here?

Guess I'll find out soon enough.

Author's Note:

Author's note: Hello everypony! way2dawn, here, again, saying,
I HATE WRITING TWILIGHT'S DIALOUGE!!! Sorry about the short chapter, couldnt think of anything else to say.

Now, Twi is outta the way, and you can probably tell who's next. See ya real soon!

Comments

[Lanafilly]

that's quite the Runaway Bold you got there hun, you should probably fix that.

EDIT: which somehow transferred over to my comment... odd

[way2dawn]

1621035
Runaway bold? Whats that?

[Lanafilly]

1621096 when you were doing the Q&A with Twilight you forgot to stop bolding so it stayed bolded through the rest of the story

[way2dawn]

1621099
Fixed!

[Lanafilly]

1621104 hooray~! ^w^

[Deadinlight]

you there! author! i neeed more @-@

[way2dawn]

1622905
sorry, no more writing today, i upladed that at school... in the cafeteria. my brain is fried, give me til sunday to start a new chapter... k?

[Deadinlight]

1623178
mmmm fried brain....and sure, not like i have any say lol

[way2dawn]

1623304
NNOPE! (sorry)

[Fireeaters]

Moar!