• Published 15th Aug 2023
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A Hogwarts Harmony - computerneek



Sometimes, the path to harmony is quite... discordant. Especially at Hogwarts.

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Chapter 7: Over-Mailed

When Hailey returned home to Privet Drive… it was to find that a second letter had shown up for her while she’d been gone. This one was instead addressed to Mr. H Potter, but still definitely destined for her.

“It’s backwards,” Petunia observed. “Maybe it’s self-addressing to whichever form you’re in when it arrives?”

“Weird,” Hailey agreed. “Maybe we’ll find out if they send a third.”


“How many do you think it will be today?” Hailey mused at breakfast. More letters had kept showing up for ‘Mr. H Potter’ in greater and greater numbers each morning- even when she’d deliberately interrupted her sleep to ensure she’d never turned back.

Petunia sighed. “Too many,” she answered. “You’d think they’d have realized by now that you’ve already agreed to attend.”

“Yeah, you’d think,” Hailey sighed. “Yesterday was over a hundred, so-!”

At that moment, a sudden boom echoed down the hallway into the kitchen and the whole house shook. It sounded like someone was knocking… hard.

There was a moment of silence.

“They’re here,” Hailey observed, and rose to her feet.

Whoever it was struck again, and the sound of breaking glass followed it.

Petunia also rose to her feet. “What the hell are they-!?”

As Hailey opened the door to the hall, the front door took a third blow- and she watched splinters fly off of it as another pane from the window next to it popped out and shattered on the floor. “We’re coming, we’re coming!” she called sharply… then stood there, by the kitchen, and waited. She had a feeling it was a bad idea to get any closer than that.

Petunia stepped up next to her. “Um…?” she began.

Before she could say anything else, Hailey’s feeling was proven as the door was hit with so much force it splintered apart, scattering debris all down the hall and revealing a giant of a man standing in the doorway.

The giant stepped in, out of the gentle drizzle outside. “Couldn’t make us a cup of tea, could yeh? It’s not been an easy journey.”

“You are breaking and entering,” Hailey observed calmly, “then asking for a cup of tea?”

“Get out of my house,” Petunia commanded.

“Where’s Harry?” the giant asked, completely ignoring them.

“Harry?” Hailey asked. “Harry who?”

“Harry Potter, o’ course,” the giant muttered. “Come to deliver his ‘Ogwarts letter.”

She raised an eyebrow. “To Harry Potter?” She paused, then turned to Petunia. “I don’t remember anyone by that name?”

“He ran away,” Petunia barked irritably, though Hailey could see the signs of her amusement. “Five years ago now. Never found him.”

“Can’t have,” the giant growled, rising to his full height and punching his head into the ceiling tiles. “The magic said-!”

“The magic has been wrong before,” Hailey snapped back at him despite not knowing what magic he was talking about, taking it as confirmation that he was magical. “Now get out, before I make you.”

“But Dumbledore said-!”

“Doesn’t matter,” she commanded, and snapped her fingers. Her wand immediately appeared in her hand, transported instantly from where she’d left it upstairs. “Get Out, before I make you.”

“Dumbledore said I wasn’t ter-!”

Bang.

Hailey wasn’t sure exactly how she knew how to do it, but she did- and it had taken her only a fraction of a second. A quick, tight flick of her wand was all it took and a bolt of scarlet light slammed straight into the giant’s chest. A moment later, the giant smashed through the door frame as he flew, backwards, out of the house.

“And stay out!” Petunia yelled after him, a couple seconds after he landed on the front lawn.

Hailey flicked her wand at the entryway, causing it to spring back together again, then walked up to the open front door and twirled her wand in her hand as she leaned against the jamb. “Go,” she commanded the giant. “Go tell this Dumbledore fool to stop sending us Hogwarts letters!”

He drew his pink umbrella and started twirling it over his head. “NEVER,” he roared, “INSULT ALBUS DUMBLEDORE IN FRONT OF ME!”

Then he swept it down to point at Hailey.

She flicked her wand almost casually, and the bolt of light that shot at her from his umbrella shattered against the shimmering silver barrier she’d conjured. A moment later, her own scarlet bolt of light connected with him, and he was thrown all the way out into the street, his umbrella twirling through the air before it landed on the ground where he’d been a moment before.

“What the hell,” someone muttered.

Hailey turned to see Auror Tonks standing on the side of the porch, her wand in her hand. “Ahh, Tonks,” she greeted. “Something happen?”

She nodded. “Yeah. Security ward tripped.” She glanced down towards the giant, who was quite suddenly surrounded by aurors. “And of course it’s Hagrid.” She sighed. “He never was very good at… Well, let’s just say he’s not the finest wand in the shop.” Then she turned back to Hailey. “But- how did you do that?”

“Do what?”

“You-! I mean-!” She sighed. “When he made it a Wizard’s Duel… how did you, a new Hogwarts student that has had her wand for not even a week, defeat Hagrid, who had three whole years of magic education before he got expelled?”

She shrugged. “I followed my instincts?” she offered. “I mean seriously, I don’t know how I did that either.” She paused. “Well… I do, but I don’t know how I knew how.”

“Something tells me you’re going to be a terrifying duelist someday,” Tonks informed her, “if not already. That was a very advanced shield alongside an intermediate disarming charm- with some mighty fast cast chaining and silent incantations.” She sighed. “That’s a lot of very high-level techniques, and you just followed your instinct?”

She nodded. “Yeah.”

“Are you, by any chance, an experienced witch that reincarnated, or…?”

She shook her head. “Nope. Not that I’m aware of, at any rate.”


Dumbledore stared at the letter before him.

A week before, just in case his enchantments on the Dursley home weren’t enough to ensure Harry got his Hogwarts letter, he’d assigned Hagrid to do just that.

He’d expected Hagrid to be absent for a week; that simply meant his enchantments weren’t enough, and Hagrid had to go to greater and greater extremes to get the letter delivered. The disappearance duration had started getting a little worrying- but then…

Then this letter.

It was a notice to the Headmaster of Hogwarts, from the Department of Magical Law Enforcement… that Hagrid had been arrested for breaking and entering, initiating a Wizard’s Duel with a minor, and six counts of breach of the Statute of Secrecy. His trial had been held the day after his arrest, as was fairly typical of cases that involved a House of sufficient standing, thanks to a Veritaserum-permitting law… and he had been sentenced to just one year in the Ministry-internal prison.

Apparently, the reason he hadn’t been sentenced to Azkaban, or to a longer sentence, was because he had done it under order in his position as a Hogwarts employee. That also meant that a case had been opened against Hogwarts regarding the same, and a couple other charges added on thanks to the details Hagrid gave during the trial- and he would be required to attend as the defendant, to represent Hogwarts.

He must be wearing too many hats. There was no other way he would have missed a case like that until after it was a done deal!

He rubbed his forehead with one hand. How was he going to smooth this over…?

He wasn’t sure it was going to smooth over. The case was marked as involving a high-standing House- Most Noble or higher- so Veritaserum would be required by law, and he wouldn’t be able to hide his reasons.

But he could lay the blame on miscommunication- that was what had happened, wasn’t it? He’d merely ordered Hagrid to ensure that Harry received his letter, with the expectation that there might be difficulties related to his relatives. He had not told Hagrid to do anything illegal.

As such, he was probably going to get off with no more than a slap on the wrist, and Hogwarts merely fined.

He didn’t think it was going to interfere with the Student Instructor Program too much, though- but he’d have to inform Princess Celestia of it before she found out through her people.

He heaved a sigh, pulled out a fresh piece of parchment and a quill, and began to compose the necessary letter.


Molly Weasley chuckled softly as she watched her youngest. She had taken the little girl along for the Hogwarts shopping season this year; this time, there would be nobody of sufficient age left at home to watch her.

Not that Ginevra had ever needed watching, for that matter. No; it had always seemed like it was Ginevra watching her older brothers and even father once, back when she’d been five, rather than them watching her. Why? Whenever she got home, Molly would always hear stories and complaints from those older babysitters that she was reprimanding them when they tried to do the things they wanted to do.

She wasn’t complaining about that, of course. Thanks to her youngest, her family had straightened out- to a degree. It still wasn’t the way she liked it, but ever since the girl had learned to walk and talk, all of her sons’ grades had skyrocketed.

And that was even before she considered just how insanely active the girl’s Accidental Magic was. As a matter of fact, it was so active she was pretty sure the girl had learned to control it already!

Now, though… Ginny was merely holding a conversation with a few much older girls that had weirdly colored hair. That itself wasn’t too unusual; rather, the weird part was that they seemed to have gone straight into a discussion of something that was too mind-bendingly strange for her to make heads or tails of. But Ginny had always been a bit of a weird child- or was it just the difference between a girl and a boy that she was looking at? She could never be sure.

Then a muggleborn with bushy brown hair had entered the apothecary they were in with Professor Minerva McGonagall and her parents… and joined the conversation with so much eager energy it was practically like she’d already been a part of it.

Then a minute later, while the muggleborn’s parents were watching the fast-paced conversation with a look of building bewilderment, the Greengrasses had walked into the shop; apparently, Daphne Greengrass was starting at Hogwarts that year. They’d had their younger daughter with them too- Astoria, according to Mrs. Greengrass.

And Astoria had also promptly joined the conversation.

Interestingly, when Molly had subsequently started a conversation with the other parents (after they had all taken care of their business in the apothecary, of course), it had been to find out that both the other girls- Hermione Granger and Astoria Greengrass- were seen as a little bit strange as well.

Author's Note:

And now, Dumbledore finds out about... some of the side effects of all those law changes. Only some of them, though.

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Still working on fifteen. My muse hasn't been interested in fanfiction lately, focusing much more on some of my other... projects. Fortunately, though, there's still a 7-chapter backlog after this one, and I'm actually properly satisfied with the way they're flowing, so I've got plenty of time to get my muse back on track!