Equestrian Recreation

by luigitime22

In Which the Fourth Wall is Annihilated Beyond Repair

Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, and Starlight Glimmer were all relaxing in the library at Canterlot Castle, reading. It was a fine day, with events like the Running of the Leaves not too far off, and the temperature was pleasant.

Twilight yawned and stretched before repositioning to read some more. “I heard the newest chapter of Make Your Mark released today,” she mumbled.

“Are we allowed to mention that here?” Starlight asked.

Discord suddenly phased through one of the bookshelves, entering the area. “When did we ever care about continuity and timelines around here?” he laughed.

---

“Well yes, he’s not wrong,” Twilight pointed out. “If I can mention the comic books in the first chapter of this… whatever it is, I’m sure we can mention the shows. Even if they are supposed to take place after we’re long dead.”

“Except for me!” Discord laughed.

“Except for him,” Twilight conceded.

“Well I suppose I can’t argue with that,” Starlight conceded. “I thought the new episodes were pretty good, myself. I particularly liked the episode where-”

Starlight was sharply cut off by the sound of Rainbow Dash screaming and flying out of the room as fast as possible, much to Twilight and Starlight’s surprise, and Discord’s amusement.

“What’s up with her?” Twilight asked.

“She hasn’t finished the chapter yet,” Discord explained. “I doubt she wants spoilers.”

---

“The winner is Bill Cipher,” the host announced, before the credits began to roll.

Twilight, Rainbow, Pinkie, and Discord all just sat on the couch in Fluttershy’s house, staring at the screen.

“Bad call,” Rainbow Dash said bluntly.

“Now be polite Rainbow, we don’t want Fluttershy to hear you,” Discord countered. After a moment, he did add, “I would absolutely win, though.”

“It is what it is, I suppose,” Twilight commented. “We lose these things almost all the time.”

“Speak for yourself. I won mine,” Dash countered with a smirk.

“And I uh… Did I win or lose? Some sort of tie? Inconclusive result?” Pinkie Pie pondered.

“For simplicity’s sake I’d just say yours was a tie,” Twilight answered.

“Well on the bright side, if they ever make Starlight fight that equality blood bending guy, that’ll be an easy win for us,” Discord noted.

“Thank you for the vote of confidence!” Starlight shouted from the other room.

Twilight snorted. “That’s not even a fair fight.”

---

“So, that puts us at 1 win, 2 losses, and whatever that was with Pinkie Pie,” Rainbow Dash tallied. “I guess there’s always next time?”

“In fairness, I got put up against a character from one of the most overpowered mediums in fiction, a fight that I was never going to win,” Twilight countered. “Especially since they just had her come back and beat Phoenix of all characters.”

“Should she have really beaten Phoenix?” Pinkie pondered.

“No,” the others all responded simultaneously.

Pinkie Pie just shrugged. “Oh well, it’s all for fun at the end of the day.”

---

The room remained largely quiet as the four continued watching their show, having switched to some other episode where an ice king was being destroyed by the Lord of the Things. Then Discord broke the silence.

“Do you ever stop and realize that with the statistics they gave me in my episode and the stats they’ve gotten in their franchise’s last episode, Rainbow Dash would beat that blue hedgehog that collects gold rings?” he asked.

Discord got multiple strange looks from the others, with Starlight even popping her head into the room in confusion. Twilight just continued watching the show neutrally. “Yeah,” she said bluntly.

---

Discord, Rarity, and Lord Tirek were back around the chess board as Rarity and Tirek went for another round.

“I see the glittery purple unicorn isn’t joining us this evening,” Tirek noted as he moved a pawn forwards.

“That’s correct,” Rarity answered. “New chapter of Make Your Mark and all that.”

“Oh right, right,” Tirek said. “I’d imagine they’re still getting used to the process. You don’t expect your villain to attack you with real lasers all that often in this world.”

“Let alone destroy your library,” Discord added.

“Twilight Sparkle had friendship crystal insurance, I don’t want to hear anymore complaining about that,” Tirek grumbled.

“Any guesses on what will happen in this chapter?” Rarity asked. “I’ll probably start it this evening.”

“Alphabittle turns out to be-”

“Something that wasn’t spoiled in the previews, thank you,” Discord cut Tirek off.

“Fine, fine…” Tirek growled.

---

“What do you mean you haven’t watched the new chapter yet?” Lyra Heartstrings said in surprise to Octavia. “Everypony’s talking about it!”

“I know, and that’s fine,” Octavia responded. “I am simply going to watch one episode an evening so I can take my time and savor each episode. Rather than just pile through it all and be done in a single sitting.”

“Why?”

“Didn’t I just explain that?”

“Well, I suppose that’s fine,” Lyra yielded. “But you’re going to have a great time! I especially loved the part where-”

Octavia just gave Lyra a glare.

“Oh. Right. Sorry,” Lyra said sheepishly.

“Quite alright, Lyra,” Octavia responded. “Just please don’t do that again.”

“Okay, I won’t,” Lyra responded. “I still have to watch the last episode myself, going to be great!”

“Oh, the last episode?” Cherry Berry asked, trotting up to Lyra and Octavia, complete with her flight attire. “It was really good! I liked where Izzy revealed she’s actually a space alien from the distant planet-”

Lyra ran off screaming, while Cherry Berry just watched her with a huge smirk and Octavia stood silently with a neutral expression.

“That was a fake spoiler, wasn’t it?” Octavia asked.

“Haven’t even started the chapter,” Cherry Berry answered.

Author's Note:

Well, this was fun.

Yes, I thought I'd have a little meta fun with everything that's been going on lately. For those wondering, I do disagree with the results of both Phoenix vs. Raven and Bill vs. Discord, (I think Phoenix and Discord should both win) but it's ultimately all in good fun. We'll get them next time. Just remember that it's perfectly fine to disagree with stuff, so long as you stay nice about it.

And I admit I have not seen Chapter 5 of MYM just yet. I'll probably take the same pattern of viewing as Octavia in this chapter, so it will be a few days before I finish. Please refrain from spoiling anything for the new chapter in the comments here for now, I do enjoy reading your comments here quite a lot. Thank you for reading!

Comments

[Block]

“Alphabittle turns out to be-”

WHAT DOES ALPHABITTLE TURN OUT TO BE?!

gib spoiler plox

[Comickook]

Hey there. Thanks very much for getting the next chapter up. Yeah, really loved so many characters running roughshed over the Fourth Wall pointing out what is ficitional (to them) and what is real. Heck, given how many fourth wall breaks there were here, I'm half-surprised there wasn't a scene with Opaline and the real Grogar with the latter making commentary on how surprised/disgusted he was that the writers chickened out on actually using him (yeah, technically spoilers, but nearly four-year-old spoilers, so they barely even qualify anymore).

Again, very much looking forward to more of this.