Luna : Disbelief
"You honorless coward! Get back here!" My legs would not support me no matter how hard I willed them to. It did not matter, she had already escaped, fleeing like a foal with her tail tucked comfortably between her legs. There was no longer reason to force myself. Where she had gone, who her next victims were, why she was doing this, all would remain unanswered because of her hasty withdrawal.
"Luna, don't push yourself too hard, you're sti-" Celestia laid her hoof on mine, the softness of her voice driving my rage beyond its limits. I jerked my foreleg away from her, the contact feeling like acid that would sear straight through my flesh to my bones.
"DO NOT!" I was filled with adrenaline as the sudden anger at her made my previous rage seem like a kittens.
"Lu-"
"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, CELESTIA!?" I could not bring myself to be concerned with how she felt. Whether or not I may hurt her feelings was the furthest thing from my mind. There was far too much at stake and she was acting as if we had the luxury of mercy. On top of that, the choices she had made up to this point were utterly atrocious. "You did nothing to stop her," I slammed my hoof down into the dirt. "YOU PROTECTED HER!" I was beginning to lose control, my Royal Canterlot Voice spilling out of my muzzle unintentionally. I was on my hooves before I knew it, wings extended, my fury giving me enough strength to accomplish what I could not mere moments ago. "SHE TRIED TO KILL YOU, TO KILL US, CELESTIA!" She would not look at me, her gaze downcast and locked on the ground as if it had just called her every bad name in the book. As the silence stretched on my anger grew to greater and greater heights. "SAY SOMETHING, SISTER!" I could no longer hold back. We did not have the time nor the resources for foolishness like this. Her tears fell to the ground, soaking into the soil as she endured the force of my fury.
She is not this weak! She has never been this weak!
and yet...
"I... I-I’m sorry, Luna," still she refused to look at me. My rage continued to boil, but her tears quashed my lack of self control. I rubbed my head, folding my wings at my sides. All was not lost, we could still salvage something from this pathetic defeat.
"Celestia, she is stealing lives," I cautiously placed my hooves on her shoulders.
That must be it, she must not understand the severity of our predicament.
Once everything was clear to her she would see what I could and all would be fine, I just had to open her eyes to the truth.
"W-what?" Her shimmering purple eyes were moist with tears and shrouded in confusion. She shook her head as her brow furrowed in the same. "I don't understand."
"It is evil magic, Tia." I had to find the correct way to convey Twilight's actions or we would get nowhere. It was not as simple as killing or being killed. "She is taking the very essence of a being's soul."
"That doesn't-" She was trying to process my words, but it was not that easy to comprehend, even for me. "How can you be sure?" her eyes narrowed on me, as if she were filled with doubt. I suddenly wanted to shake her until she lost consciousness. I was not the enemy here and it frustrated me more than anything that she would question me.
"CELESTIA!" Our muzzles were nearly touching, eyes locked, neither willing to back down. I refused to falter. She flinched first, pushing my forelegs off of her shoulders and stomping away in a huff. "You must accept the truth, Celestia. Twilight Sparkle is no longer the mare you thought her to be." She paced back and forth, gaze locked on the dirt. She said something I was unable to perceive, but for some reason I became irritated, perhaps because I knew her words were something I did not wish to hear. "Speak louder, Sister."
"YOU'RE WRONG!" The blast of her Royal Canterlot Voice rocked me enough to make me fall backwards onto my behind.
Well, I did say louder.
She went back to pacing, the frustration on her face not subsiding in the least. The second I had been stunned only managed to exacerbate my aggression tenfold.
"When will you finally see that Twilight Sparkle is not the savior you made her out to be?" I stabbed at her heart, an underhanded tactic, but I was beyond being rational at this point. Now it was about hurting her as much as she had me.
So petty.
"She saved you, Luna." Sister's words were calm in contrast to her demeanor, the truth of her statement ringing true. It stung at my heart... It was well deserved pain.
"And I am eternally grateful," I had to approach things differently, find an alternate route to peace.
Perhaps we can find common ground if I can just control myself.
"But you must admit she has changed, Tia. These are not the actions of your once most faithful student." A sheen of anger passed over her face for a second, but left as quickly as it came. She sighed, the tension leaving her body.
"You're right, Luna," she sat down, rubbing her face with a hoof. "She's not... she's not the same. Something is... wrong. It feels like..." she looked at me after trailing off. I felt exposed all of a sudden, like I was being probed under a microscope.
"Like what, Tia?" I knew what she referred to, but feigned ignorance. She was aware as well, but refused to be honest with me. We grew silent, staring at each other like a couple of fools. She shook her head, averting her eyes.
"Nothing, Luna," she sighed again. As we inched towards being open with one another it became harder and harder to progress. "What happened, Luna? What did she do to you?"
Can she handle the truth?
She had been at the mercy of her student, still she would not turn against her. Would my near death confrontation change anything in her mind? Not knowing if it would made my blood run cold.
"She attempted to strike me down, blindsided me from behind after I left you." Tia did not react, only listened, a new mask concealing her real emotions. "We fought. I showed her mercy." Sister's face lit up at that. I could not tell her that I truly regretted doing so.
If only I had remained vigilant.
"She deceived me. She has a monster, a behemoth of unfathomable scale." The memory of that beast made me shudder.
"Do you not know what it was, Sister?" Celestia's curiosity seemed to stir at the thought of the mysterious monster.
"I was pinned... and afraid," I reluctantly admitted. That is why I was defeated. My lack of courage. There was no point in keeping it from her. I could only learn from my mistake and move on. I would not make the same errors in judgment a second time.
"Is it so frightening?" she asked. "To overcome you was once an impossible feat for any being, alive or dead." I blushed at her compliment. Praise from Tia always struck me as unearned. It felt like an eternity ago that I had been that powerful.
"Nay, sister, I have not..." The truth here could create friction between the two of us, but I needed answers, now more than ever. "I still have not regained my full capabilities yet." A tic in my sister's jaw showed through her mask, letting me know that I had indeed struck a nerve.
"Which I suppose is my fault." I could not say for sure whether she was being genuine or mocking. Pursuing peace was the correct choice regardless of her snarky attitude.
"Surely you would agree this endeavor has failed, Tia?" If all was well that ended well, then this was most certainly not well.
"Why would you assume that, Luna?" The way which she asked that question echoed Twilight's inquiries during our battle. It was less a query and more an observation. I was being evaluated by her and I hated it.
"What did it accomplish? What have we accomplished, Sister? We have lost our home and our land. We are fragile, weak enough to be threatened with death." Tidal Force came to mind. "Even our faithful have doubted us because of this experiment of yours. Your own student has become..." Were Tia and I always so different? What could she see that I could not?
"We can rebuild our home. We can take back our land. We can regain our strength. We can inspire our faithful... rally our subjects once again. My student..." she paused considering her next words carefully. "We will help my student, we will save her."
"Your optimism is most admirable, Tia, but you did not answer my question." She was not wrong. I had told Twilight Sparkle the exact same things, but what benefit came from all of this nonsense that could justify the losses we had taken?
"Over sixty years of peace, sixty years of precious, irreplaceable time and memories with my little sister," her smile warmed my heart, her mask gone. Memories flooded through my mind.
"Remember when we learned how to ice skate?" I chuckled. She laughed, delighted by the thought. We had used a spell to freeze the lake and spent the day falling all over ourselves endlessly. Well I had, Celestia was naturally good at everything she set her mind to.
"How could I forget?" she covered her mouth, failing to stifle the laughs. "I've never seen anypony so clumsy as you, Luna. I thought you were going to break a bone, or at least the ice itself." I could feel myself growing red as an apple.
"Tia, it was very difficult!” I think I had fallen more than one hundred times that day. "And you used magic! That was cheating!" I accused playfully.
"It worked didn't it?" she winked at me. She had not wobbled even once in her attempts. After a couple of hours she was an expert, even performing a pirouette with little effort. "But I'm pretty sure you were much more fulfilled by the experience than I was, in the end."
"Tis true." My first lake spanning trip without falling over made my heart soar. The embarrassment, time, and effort were all worth it once I had accomplished my goal. No magic, no wings, just me.
"I wouldn't give up those memories for anything, Luna," she looked up into the sky, most likely recalling more good memories. Perhaps she was right. I had more fun in those years than I could remember in all the rest of my life. Simply sitting with Tia in front of the fireplace and having a meal was more than I could ever ask for. Come to think of it, we did everything together during that time. Meals, activities, chores, there was not a single day I could recall where we were separate for more than a few hours.
Such mundane things... Such precious things.
"Tia, did... you..." She looked at me expectantly, her smile a knowing one. "Did you do all of this for us?" I fell to my rump. "For me?" She simply nodded.
"I realized something when you were... gone, Lulu," her face twisted in grief. "We are a part of each other. I cannot live without you sister, and I believe you feel the same way." I thought long and hard about how it felt when we were apart.
"When we are... separated for long I begin to feel..."
"Divided?"
"Yes!" I agreed emphatically, still trying to sift through my thoughts. "Like I am missing something important that I must find." Tia nodded again, her expression telling me she knew the exact feeling.
"There is no place I would rather spend the rest of my life, be it hours or multiple eternities, than with you, Luna. That is why I have made the decisions I have." She was too skilled at speaking. Years of politics honed her craft to an unreasonable level. I was sure she could convince me of anything, even something as foolish as throwing myself into a bottomless inescapable pit. And so, I relented.
"Forgive me, Sister," I sighed. "I did not know." She only shook her head.
"Forgive me, Luna, maybe it would be better if I were a bit less mysterious with my plans from now on." We smiled at each other, finally coming to an accord that put to rest any grievances I had about that subject.
The past is the past and it is done and gone.
As far as I was concerned she had justified her actions. There was just one more issue we had to deal with. Perhaps, the most difficult issue we had to discuss.
"Then we must speak on one more subject, Sister." I was steadfast in my conviction.
"I know, Luna," she raised a hoof, a look of grim determination crossing her features. "If we are to save Twilight, we must face her," she exhaled harshly. "You spoke of evil magic?"
"Both her and the beast were able to wield it." She looked uncomfortable at the possibility. "It was large enough to swallow Ponyville in a single bite and its flames..."
How best to describe them?
"Deconstructed my being."
"De... constructed?" She did not understand and I could not hold that against her. Experience was probably the only true way to comprehend the ferocity of the beast.
"My particles..." I thought harder. "my atoms?" I knew I sounded and looked ridiculous as I gestured with my body. "Disintegration!" I clapped my hooves together. "But not just my body, my... soul." That was not the term I would select again, given the opportunity. She was quiet for a long time, her eyes shut.
"I must be frank, Luna, this is a little hard to accept," she looked at me like I had just told her it was literally raining cats and dogs. "Your soul, Sister?" I knew it had been folly to mention that. The soul was unproven, a concept not even acknowledged in most intellectual circles. Not even I was certain I believed in souls, but it was the best I could come up with to describe what had happened to me.
"What purpose would it serve to lie, Tia?" I asked with a shrug, praying she would not fight me on this.
"Perhaps you're mistaken?" she asked, eliciting an annoyed rolling of my eyes. "A beast that gobbles up ponies? Using evil magic to steal souls? To be honest, Luna, that sounds more like an old mares tale abou-" She stopped, her eyes shooting open.
"Say it," I growled, aware of exactly where she was going on her tangent. Her lack of faith in me also contributing to my sudden anger.
"Forgiv-"
"SAY IT!" It was my turn to use the Royal Canterlot Voice. I was hovering off the ground, wings flapping of their own volition.
"I will not, Luna," she set her jaw, an immovable statue. Again we glared at one another, yet this time I was the one to fold.
"Coward." I descended, turning from her and sitting down roughly.
Why must things like this be so complicated?
Why can I not just tell her the truth and be believed? Why am I perceived as so... unreliable?
I knew the answers, yet that made it no less frustrating. As Celestia's hoofsteps drew closer I tensed, expecting a flick of her wing to my head or a slap on the shoulder. Often, when we argued she would reprimand my name calling with physical punishments. Instead, her soft wing enveloped me as she took a seat next to me.
"I'm sorry, Luna," she looked down at me, her warm body inviting, relaxing. I rested my head against her chest, all my negative emotions melting away immediately.
"If I could take it back, I would do so without hesitation, Tia. It is my greatest shame and sincerest regret."
But I cannot. All I can do is try to be better. Try to never go down that horrible path ever again.
"I know, Lulu, I know," she rubbed my side with her feathers. "You weren't to blame then, or now." I wanted to protest, but her comforting embrace was intoxicating.
Why does she think that?
"I should have been there for you. I should have listened. I should have been a better big sister."
"Tia, you have always been the best sister I could ever ask for. You can not blame yourself for my paranoia or my failures." My words hushed her. I could sense her thinking deeply, gathering together something that had troubled her for far too long, finally prepared to discuss it.
"Lulu?" She spoke after what felt like an eternity, in reality only a couple moments.
"Yes, Tia?" I knew what was coming. I could feel it in my bones. We had avoided it for almost one hundred years. I nuzzled deeper into her welcoming embrace, steeling myself for the coming storm.
"Why did you turn against me, Sister?"
So we are jumping right in?
I did not want that. Maybe stick a hoof in to test the water and then slowly submerge myself to acclimate, not throw caution to the wind and pull the trigger.
"Going right for my jugular, Tia?" I evaded the question, opting to act foolish instead. Tia, unfortunately, did not take the bait, nor was she going to let me off the hook so easily.
"Forgive me, Sister, but I... we must deal with this." If that was what she wanted then so be it. I took a deep breath, the Nightmare appearing vividly in my mind's eye.
"I was hurt, Tia... scared. It felt like I was trapped in a dark place with no hope of escape. You-" I stopped short.
No, I will not blame her. It had been me. It had all been me.
"I failed to make you understand. I did not, I should have tried more. Should have..." It was all regret, all things I would do differently if given another opportunity. It was always so easy to see clearly with the benefit of hindsight, but anypony could easily see how foolish I had been. Tia stroked my shoulder with her wing, a constant reminder of the endless sympathy that I did not deserve. "I hated you, more than I have ever hated anypony or anything else, I loathed you. I made you a villain, made you my enemy. Everything was your fault. Our subjects neglecting me. My insecurities as ruler. My inability to fix anything. It was so much easier to blame you rather than myself, to wish that you would..." I choked back the tears, wrapping her warm body in my forelegs. She hugged back rocking gently, soothing me like a mother would her foal. I wept into her coat. To think that I ever wished for her to go away... to die. "I'm so sorry, Sister. I'm so..." She quietly shushed me. As my cries slowly dwindled, she spoke.
"You know, Luna, I have never blamed you for what happened, not once."
Who then? It was I who let the darkness consume me. T'was I who chose to be evil. There was none other than I...
"Then who, Sister? Surely you do not-"
"I had such a long time to examine myself, Luna," she paused. "Even now saying things like that feels... wrong."
"In what way, Tia?" I did not see how it could be her fault. It was not possible, but we both needed relief and this could be cathartic for her.
"As if I was the only one who suffered. As if your imprisonment wasn't drastically worse than anything that happened to me." I could detect the disgust in her. Perhaps a self loathing. I was an expert at identifying that by now.
"But you do not truly believe that, Tia. Why hold such trivial things against yourself?" I could not comprehend her self flagellation.
"Because it FEELS like I do, Luna." Her exhaled breath was an exasperated one. "I saw you, Sister. I wasn't oblivious. It wasn't some grand revelation that you were unhappy. I watched you become bitter and envious. I watched you grow cold and seclude yourself. I said nothing. I did nothing."
But why? Why would that matter?
We were both buried under our duties. She had held herself together. She had remained strong. She had never fallen from the righteous path. Why then, should she have to hold me together as well?
"Sister, you bear no obligation to keep me on the correct path." I intended to absolve her, but my words sounded hollow in my own ears. "The fault lies with me, strictly with me."
"You were never a good liar, Luna." Her words should have incensed me, but instead made me wince.
Do I bear something against her?
After all this time, after all the love and kindness I had been given, did I still resent her?
No. NO! Tis not true. It cannot be true.
If it was, then I-
"Lulu?" She pulled back looking down at me. I did not want to see her. I wanted to crawl into a deep dark hole and never come out.
Such shame.
She placed a hoof under my chin and tilted my head back. Her purple eyes filled with so much love I had to bite my tongue to quell my tears. "If you never admit I bear responsibility as well, you'll never let go of the grudge you have against me."
She knows!? Of course she knows.
The tears came once again, despite my best efforts. "Luna, I am scared."
Why? What could cause such feelings in you, dearest sister? I will destroy it. I will kill whatever causes you such pain.
"Of what, Tia?" speaking was troublesome through my tears.
"You." As her tears fell, my heart broke in two. I was the problem. I had always been the problem. I- "You must be honest with me, Luna. I need you to tell me how you feel, how I made you feel when I neglected you."
"Sister, I'm-" I tried to look away. Down, left, right, up, anywhere but into the loving eyes of the one I had betrayed all those years ago. The eyes of the one that feared me.
"Luna," I could not look away. I had to face it... to face her, had to admit what I had been denying for so long. And so did she. "Lulu, I'm so sorry." I could see no more for the tears. They cascaded like waterfalls on a moonlit night. The dam had broken and there was no holding its contents back.
"Tia, where were you?!" I hit her with a hoof, though there was no strength behind it, only over a millennia of sadness. "Why weren't you there!" Another strike with no power, only sorrow. "I was all alone!" Isolation. "You have always been there!" Confusion. "You are my light, Sister!" Rage. "You left me!" Abandonment. "You went away and it was so dark!" Envy. "I was so scared!" Fear. "And then..." The Nightmare. I bawled uncontrollably into her chest, my sobs echoing all around us as I weakly struck her with my hooves. She held me close, stroking my mane. As my tantrum died down I knew I had to put everything on the table. She was right. I had to be completely honest. If there was ever a time to do so, it was the present. "I only wanted you, Tia," I sniffled. "Even if the whole world turned against me, even if I had nopony else, I could be happy if you were with me. I could go on as long as my light guided me," I sighed. "But you were not there." We were quiet for a while. I could hear her sniffling, feel the warmth of her tears dripping onto my mane as she held me close.
"Please Luna, forgive me. Truly, there is no greater fool than I." She had abandoned me, left me alone in the blackest of darkness. Yet she was here now, whenever I needed her, she was here. She was with me, holding me, comforting me, apologizing to me, right here, right now. I hugged her tightly. "Never again, Luna," she kissed the top of my head, nuzzling into my mane. "I will never make a mistake like that ever again. I'm not going anywhere, Sister, I swear." I felt weightless. The gravity of such burdensome events melting away, leaving behind it a path to true joy for the both of us. It was gone. Something even overcoming the Tantabus could not fully provide me replaced it. Peace. I squeezed my dearest sister as hard as I could.
"I forgive you, Tia." I never wanted to let her go. My sister... My light...
Stats
Page generated in 0.018 seconds
Total duration
994 users online
1,345,876 hits today, 2,244,100 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Welcome back! Hope your eyes are good as new!
Looks like both Luna and Tia had things to get off their chest. Luna is still bitter about the Nightmare Moon incident and Tia has trouble accepting what Twilight had become. But now that they talked things out, I hope that finally nothing will hold them back from taking on her.
Twilight taking the life essense of ponies makes me think this is a sick attempt to preserve everypony and keep them to herself without ever losing everypony again. Would make the most sense though it's probably giving her too much credit to assume she has any sense left in her addled mind.
Keep up the good work!
11464510
Thanks man. I can't wait til they fight together...if they fight together. Twilight is super fun to write I hope it goes good.
Sheesh... On one hand, the interaction between the siblings brought an invisible tear to my eye.
us-tuna-sounds-images.voicemod.net/8c635e27-83d9-4c74-a0a5-5e6295a007f9-1661130531391.jpg
On the other hand, I have a strange sense of humor that made me laugh at how all of this ‘feely stuff’ happened after Miss Porple Sporkle rampaged against the sisters!
i.ytimg.com/vi/uBw2gX4TNSM/maxresdefault.jpg
Unfortunately, because of a certain story and stories I can’t fully enjoy the beautiful platonic, sisterly love between Princess Luna and Princess Celestia anymore without thinking about…the thing.
Besides the controversy, good chapter, author.
Blessings
-Davidtin
11712344
Appreciate you still reading. There are NO romantic feelings between Luna and Tia here.
Also, to be clear, my headcanon is definitely not them together. That's too wacky. I actually think Luna's true spouse is Shifting Sands. An oc character from Timeless by Radbunny, a spectacular Luna romance fic. I highly suggest it if you have the time.
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/439476/timeless
Also, yeah I also got a few moments of "am I lathering on the sappiness too much here?" Whew the sappiness gets much worse.
This chapter strikes me as very personal.
What a weight the sisters seem to be under. Who is really at fault? What has driven them apart? Certainly not their own proclivities. Then what?
They seem to be rent by the onus of their duties and an adumbrated moral obligation which was too much for feeling beings to bear. I hope this is explored further as the story progresses.
It's interesting that C would 'experiment' with Twilight for the sake (apparently) of alleviating whatever this 'burden' entails. But what about poor Twi?
We'll see...
Some pretty big feels here.
11884740
Spot on. Especially the experimenting with Twi observation. Arguably, Tia improved her life. On the other hand it could be perceived as a cursed life.
I know what my perception of it is, but I like the idea of others thinking a righteous being is evil.