!00 veiws and no comment, for shame. So i chall since i always give foal con a chance to shine.

1250255 18 min later 104 views and two comments

You deserve a ......[img]IMAG0032[/img] that is all.

Fix grammer than story will be so much better.

Some improvements:

then brought my hoof up to the door and pushed the door open.

Better: then brought my hoof up to the door and pushed it open.

Maybe use Word for the small grammar mistakes and reread what you wrote to spot others like the one mentioned above.

That aside, you wrote a hot little foal con fic. Maybe a bit rushed, but still nice.

Bronydragon